chapter vi. | forget

“Finally,” Jisoo rejoiced. “Our Hayi’s free from that dreadful history paper’s that been keeping her from us!”

That earned her a couple of chuckles and Hayi was reminded of the enthusiastic Suhyun from this morning. She had kept her suspicion but was more gleeful than anything to have her friend back at her side during lunch.

“Yeah,” Jinhwan added. “It’s weird. Felt like I barely saw you throughout the whole of last week.”

Hayi along with Jisoo, Jinhwan and Junhoe was making their way to their first period. As Hayi was dismissed from homeroom earlier, she bumped into the trio.

Walking like this side to side made her resonate with what Jinhwan said. She was glad everything was back to normal again. No more hiding.

In a way though that was a total lie because that deal she had with Hanbin was anything but normal. If Hayi didn’t know any better, she would’ve thought the whole thing a crazy dream.

The pressure of Hanbin’s lips against hers was no lie, however, as she swore the sensation still lingered whenever she thought about it. 

Surprisingly though, the deal despite being sealed with that one fateful kiss in the library was not needed as often Hayi expected it to. That made sense though. Hanbin wasn’t always on the edge, waiting to explode at every minute of the day.

It was just quite odd because he seemed a lot calmer these days. More careful, if Hayi had to be precise. It was as if he fought to avoid an episode himself.

And that was good, right?

But then there was also the way he had been acting around her. In all honesty, one of her biggest fears was the awkwardness that would ensue after but there was none of that. In fact, it was almost as if the old Hanbin was coming back to her.

He seemed to open up again, making casual conversations with her and even walking her up to her street when they used to part ways a few blocks before that. He had been pretty distant for a long time now. That had been her dilemma but now it was almost perfect.

Almost, if Hayi didn’t feel suspicious of it all.

Something still seemed to stop him from letting her in completely and this wall between them had only softened. Not vanished.

“Well, here’s my class.” Jisoo drifted away to the door with a wave. “See you guys at break.”

The remaining trio saw her off. “Have fun, Jisoo!” Hayi called.

As they resumed their journey, Jinhwan let out a sigh beside her. “Thank god for the mid-break that’s coming soon. I’ve been swarmed with assignments lately. I only have that science competition to deal with now.”

“Oh yeah, how’s that going? Isn’t that a science test for advanced levels?” Hayi asked.

“All for one measly certificate you get for participating,” Junhoe added uninterestedly.

“It’s good for my academic profile. You wouldn’t understand, June. You’re not a senior yet and universities really look into that.”

Hayi silently agreed. The kid was still a year below them after all.

Jinhwan turned to Hayi. “How about you, Hayi?”

“I at science,” she said. “But I heard about this creative writing scholarship. I might try out for that.”

“Oh, yeah that,” Jinhwan nodded. “Good luck. I heard many have their eyes on that.”

Hayi frowned. She didn’t want to openly admit it but the future was really uncertain in her eyes.

With no passions or goals in mind, graduating was not that exciting. The adult world was scary and she wasn’t sure whether she was ready for it. She was only trying out for the scholarship because it was the only thing that made her feel like she was going somewhere.

She fleetingly wondered what Hanbin planned to do after graduating. She should ask him soon.

“Wow, all that coffee from this morning for nothing. You guys sure know how to bore a person,” Junhoe said, picking up pace.

The other two glared at the younger boy despite being used to his attitude. Leave it to Junhoe to ruin a rather serious moment but Hayi was somewhat relieved with the distraction.

“Brat,” she said affectionately before noticing her English class door right in her view. “Here’s my stop.”

“Lucky you,” Jinhwan sighed. “I still have to walk with that little down the hall.”

Hayi did feel bad for him and hope Junhoe doesn’t completely ruin his morning with his usual acidic comments. She smiled at the elder with a sympathetic pat on the shoulder.  

“Later Jinhwan,” then after, “Junhoe!”

Junhoe turned to acknowledge her with an expressionless wave just as Jinhwan scuttled to catch up to him. She inwardly giggled at the sight of their mismatched heights before remembering what class was about to commence.

Butterflies soon filled her at the realisation.

Right…

English with Hanbin.

The class was almost full. Still tired, Hayi succumbed to a sleepy state and laid her head on the desk. She rested her eyes, the power of the coffee she drank earlier already dwindling. The day hadn’t even started.

Eyelids closing almost completely, an icy sensation jolted them back open. Her head sprang up so fast it almost dizzied her. She blinked groggily to find an iced mocha next to her arm.

“Morning.”

She heard a shuffle next to her and by the time her brain caught up, Hanbin was already settled in his seat. Slowly, she picked up the takeaway cup in her hand like she had never seen it before in her life.

Wow. This was one of those little things he hadn’t done in a while. What was the occasion?

She took an experimental slurp, the chilled drink waking her up instantly.

“What’s this for?”

Hanbin was quiet for a moment, shifting in his seat.

“An apology,” he eventually said.

Hayi was dumbfounded. “For what?”

His brows knotted deeper in thought as he murmured.

“Everything, really.”

She could only guess he was talking about the party and everything surrounding it.  That was a while ago though so it was unexpected.

“It’s a little too late for that, isn’t it?” she dismissed casually to lighten the mood.

However, the boy only seemed more devastated, the corners of his mouth pulling down further than up.

“You’re right. It’s been a long time coming, but,” his hand suddenly landed her elbow, tingles shooting from his touch. His eyes found hers. “I’m really sorry.”

Hayi went blank for a second.

She didn’t know to think of the remorse in his eyes. It was a vivid emotion she hadn’t seen in him in ages. Only reserved when he lost total control and Hayi would cry because she didn’t know what to do. That was when they were younger. Around elementary when he used to cry as well in his fit.

Though there were no tears in Hanbin’s eyes now they were as genuine as then.

Which baffled her even more.

Why? It had been so long and now he was guilt-ridden and gifting her