Hanbin sit beside Chaejung on the bench with two glass of machiato, which is Chaejung’s favorite from the near coffeshop around Han River. They have been stopped at one of the secluded are where there is not much people passing by, enjoying the night view.

Chaejung takes a deep breath as she receive the machiato and sipped it carefully. Enjoying the warm that slowly invading her stomach. She glance at Hanbin as he put his outer suit on her shoulder, being a gentleman he is.

“ Oppa. . “ Hanbin frown upon hearing the endearing nickname. The funny thing is. . Chaejung only call him Oppa when she need to talk seroiusly with him,” W—what are you doing, Oppa?” asked Chaejung.

Hanbin notice how her eyes become glossy. How she trying hard to facade her emotion. But he know her too well to notice the astronomical pain behind those eyes. After all, they had been dating for 4 years and know each other for 7 seven years.

“ Jungie-ah. . I am so sorry. . Oppa is sorry for everything Jungie-ah. . “

And she start shaking the moment he said the words. She trying to regain her breath as she push away Hanbin’s hand that trying to reach for her. Trying to hold her. Instead she starting make a distance between them.

He should be sorry.

How she wish that he said those words two years ago when he practically cheat on her. Throwing their 4 years relationship in trash as he easily break her up through the cellphone.

The fact is he left her to be with another woman. He left her when she do nothing to wronged him. She always imagine how Hanbin gonna be her first and her last. The one that have been with her since the beginning. What they had is beautiful that it’s really unbelievable when he suddenly decide to end their relationship.

Her family know him. Her parents who is actually dislike how she have boyfiend when she just a junior high school student despise him at first. But slowly, through time, they gain her parent’s acceptance.

She know his family too as they often hang out together.

Everything is perfect with their parents approval. She trust him blindly. Trust him wo never have a change of heart, But she never expected to get a betrayal in return.

In her depression days, she clearly remember at all those nasty thinking.

What does she have that I doesn’t have?

The reason why she suddenly wanted to enter the showbiz. Because she wanted to know what make that woman more than her until he choose to turn his back on her. She wanted to understand his world more. To know where their relationship possibly goes wrong. She keep comparing herself with that woman, questioning her self worth as she slowly falling into depression.

Is it really her?

Is it really beacuse they have different world and can’t be together?

Is it because she is only a nerdy high school girl who already accepted in law major and he is an idol who will have a lot of fangirl?

Is it because she is lacking something so he find comfort on others?

And for two years. Two long years of questioning all those self-blaming questing, she finally can assure herself that she is not the one who is lacking. She gives her all to their relationship to make it work. But it’s him. He is the one who choose to leave her and seek comfort from others. He is the one who choose other woman rather than her.

But now. . to finally hear him said the words, she just wanted to laugh loudly at him. Why is he sorry? It’s his decision after all.

He already make his decision. Now, it’s her turn, right?

“ Funny how you said sorry to me. . Did the girl dump you?” asked Chaejung bitterly.

“ That woman. . she is someone from my company. . We are on the same age. . “ said Hanbin carefully as he watched she suddenly b with tears. He just wanted to grab her and hug her but he know better than doing that,” We met a few weeks after the show WIN : Who is Next Began. . “

“ She is stubborn and ambitious like me, always stand on her ground and that is what makes me so interested in her. It’s just. . She like the woman version of me. . “ said Hanbin,” I have been cheating on you for three months. . I got caught up in the showbiz and lonely when I can’t met you. . Phonecall doesn’t ease my loneliness. . I lied to you a lot of time. . We just kiss. . And I never sleep with her. . “ shame can be heard from his voice. 

“ But then I know that she only play with me. . This girl is not at fault. . She said sorry because she lead me on. . The truth is. . she is on a love-hate relationship with one of my sunbae and she just wanted to get an expression out of him by befriend me. . But she doesn’t inted to drag it for so deep that we have an affair behind our spouse. .She never love me as she just see me as a friend. . A rival as we have the same passion on rap and writing songs. .  “

“ What is the purpose of telling this to me now ?! Are you wanted to parade on my face how she love you better than me?!! ” snap Chaejung as tears streaming down her eyes. Hanbin slowly engulf her in his arms as the girl strugging to get away. But no way he gonna let her go.

“ Hit me. . yell at me. . do anything. . just. . just don’t leave me again, Jungie ah. . “ said Hanbin as tears started to streaming down from his eyes.

“ All I ever do is love y—you. . “ sobs Chaejung as she shakily hit his shoulder,” Lov