The rush of warm water run through her body as she carefully message all the sore muscle. The stiff neck and shoulder until her numb toes—thanks to her 7 inchies Louboutine heels— as she moan deliciously. The euforia of the event already ended as she makes her way back to one of hotel in Hongkong. The warm water droplets formed steam all around her, enveloping her body, making the glass walls mistead over.

It’s not a luxurious hotel, but a simple and ecent hotel where doesn’t cost much.

Celebrity is not damn rich people actually.

She have to say goodbye first to her Oppa who have to headed to Korea first due to his tight schedule. And her manager already head back to Korea too because he miss his family and it’s her vacation day. She have one week free from schedule after the end of her shoot yesterday. 

And what is she doing here?

Because one particular man beg her to spend 24 hours in Hongkong together after the event.  And like a wrapped woman she is, she eventually agree on him. Like always.

She is .

It’s been almost two months. Two months since her first encounter with her ex boyfriend who is now back to his current boyfriend, Kim Hanbin. Or people know him as B.I, leader of IKON under YG entertainment, One of the talented rapper in Korea together with his bandmates, Bobby. She clearly remember two months ago, she was so determinate that she doesn’t have any feeling to him anymore. He is no one to her and she have nothing to do with him anymore. Because for her, a man like him doesn’t worth of her time. A man like him doesn’t deserve her. A man who had hurt her, who had lied to her, who had betray her in the most sinful way to her fragile heart. . the man who actually her first on anything, her first love.

Fast forward to one month after their first encounter, she back to the old Kim Chaejung. The woman who is completely head over heels to him.

Sleeping together in the same bed, eating late dinner together, going to a secret date, make ramen in the middle of the night, texting and called each other almost everyday, sharing their life together, basking in the fire they start again.

She know that she keep telling Hanbin that she doesn’t trust him yet. But her heart know that if Hanbin tell her that the sky is green then she will, again, blindly trust him.

She sniggered as she feels so mad at herself.

She remember everything that her Oppa said in the event. She is .  

In the space of weeks they are back together, gone was the independent woman. The woman who had worked so hard to stand on her own feet after being broken and fall into deep depression. The woman who had worked so hard to earn her self confidence, stopping asked about what that other woman have that she doesn’t have, and realizing her self-worth again. The woman who—after months living in self-hatred, depression, suicidal thought, bitter and cynical mind and constant anger to herself—had to crawl on her hands and knees to get herself out from the hell she created. Shedding tears, blood and sweat just to be her oldself before she know a person name Kim Hanbin.

His betrayal is like a poison that keep eating her from inside, slowly destroy her soul.

And here she is now again. .

Wrapped around his finger.

Her inability to deny him in anything disgust her.

And now all the pent up question started to resurface again. Her Oppa words who is ringing to her ear just like a fresh wind on summer.

You know, love. . Oppa only wanted your happiness. . But Oppa guarantee nothing if he would repeat the same thing again. You can’t possibly goes to mental therapy and depressed again right?

Will she be able to be independent and stand on her own ground again? Will she be able to recover if he did hurt her again? They are still young. Barely 21 years old. In the next five years, will he still love her like now? Will he still love her the same?

As the question after question keep appearing in her mind as she fall to her knees. Letting the water pour on her head as she started to weep. Unable to pretend that eveything is okay.

She let herself cry, allow herself to grieve over her lost. The woman who her Oppa loves so much. Because she know, she already lost this battle. There is no way out anymore as her heart keep yearning to him.

Hanbin just stand outside her bathroom door as he hear her crying. He just got back from the event, after saying goodbye to as she wanted to stay in Hongkong for the next 24 hours, he drive himself to her hotel.

She already tell him the pass code as he doesn’t need to knock.

The pitifull weeping of the woman who holds his heart making his own eyes welled in tears.

The instict to rush inside, gather her inside his embrace and comforting her is so strong that he lend his body to wall.

Maybe because he doesn’t know what she had been through for the past two years.

He only hear story but it’s not quiet explain what she had been through. She never really tell him what she had been through for the past two years. She never tell him what is the reason why she choose to be actress when he know to well that her dream is to become a lawyer as she loves books so much. She never tell him what is the real reason why her family hate him so much.

She never tell him anything.

Sure she tell her days to him. From her drama to CF, but she never actually tell him about something close to feeling.

He hear the water turn off as he decide