Throwing a stone at my originally calm heart,

Maybe you don't know

Tell me that everything you've said before was just a prank to fool me, oh

I've always wanted to say, without feeling awkward,

Looking back at the past, I regret everything like a fool.

My heart has always been yours but I'm just waiting impatiently, yeah I'm a fool.

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Filming schedules were done and we're on our break today.

The maknae line except Tzuyu went to school. I was supposed to sleep in today, but as soon as I saw the date on my phone, I was suddenly awake.

I stood quickly, running to Nayeon's room.

"What is it?" Nayeon was fixing her room.

"...Want to go out, unnie?"

"Omo, you're taking me out for a date?" She said with a hint of sarcasm.

"Chaeyoung and I have been together for 2 months already!"

"Aigoo. I thought we were gonna have some happy time together. Where are we going?" She asked.

"I'm planning to do a surprise for her in the bedroom!

"Hold it right there! Did I hear that correctly? In the bedroom!?" Shocked by my reply.

Aigoo, this 20-year-old woman's head who ironically persists to act like a kid.

"I mean like the kind you see on Instagram a lot."

"Oh... Those with the balloons and lights and stuff? ...That's very expensive to pull off." She said.

"Yeah. I saved a lot for this. I plan to do the lights and balloons. I also have our selcas printed!"

"Let's go then." She proceeded to prepare for a shower and so did I.

It's the first time in my life doing this and I'm worried if it would be overdone and cheesy. Honestly, this is something couples do on their anniversary. We've had like, only two months.

Anyways. A little effort doesn't hurt, right?

Nayeon and I went to this one party shop that sold heart-shaped balloons and we bought an air pump and balloons that were white because we wanted to go with purity as the concept. Chaeyoung is young and innocent; it was the perfect color to match the dim lights that we were going to set up. The next destination was my favorite cake shop that we always go to. We picked this small strawberry cake because Chaeyoung really, really loves strawberry.

Unlike the usual "girls take too much time choosing things to buy" thing, we were fast and decisive enough to get a lot of time in preparation.

No one but Chaeyoung, Nayeon and I knew about the relationship Chaeyoung and I have. Even my co-members didn't know that it was actually serious.

We stepped inside our dorm, catching the other members eating lunch.

"What's the occasion?" Sana asked.

Nayeon and I looked at each other, a box of cake and the bag containing the air pump and the balloons in hand respectively.

I nodded to Nayeon.

"It's Mina and Chaeyoung's 2nd monthsary as a couple!" Nayeon announced to the whole room.

"Eh?" The reaction was heard from everyone.

I was really shy and somehow embarrassed for them to know about this.

No one has came out yet until this time, exposing me and Chaeyoung.

"So, Mina you're actually..." The words came out Jihyo's lips.

"... a lesbian?"

"...Yes." I nodded with hesitation.

Everyone suddenly clapped happily.

"Welcome to the club, Mina!" Momo said while everyone got up to group hug me.

"Wait what?"

"We're all actually homouals here." Jungyeon said.

I was more surprised than touched. No one told me this ever before!

"We were keeping our relationships within those who told about theirs, you and Chaeyoung were the ones who weren't saying anything." Momo said.

"Let's cut this all out and start with the plan, shall we?" Nayeon said.

"We don't even know the plan." Jungyeon complained and Nayeon rolled her eyes in response.

"I'm planning to make a heart shape on the wall beside her bed using our white Christmas lights and fill the room with white balloons while giving space for a walkway to the bed. On the bed will be our selcas and pictures also forming a heart shape. Once she enters the room and sees it, I will enter with the cake. Got it?"

The room was silent with everyone's face surprised.

"Wow! Chaeyoung must be something. She made Mina talk this fast and long just for a plan!" Jihyo said in disbelief.

"If Mina is this hyped, then let's get started!" Sana replied energetically.

The whole room got busy.

Momo, Jihyo and Jungyeon were inflating the balloons while Sana and Nayeon did the lighting.

Jihyo and Jungyeon had a great time doing the pumping together while Momo was slowly tying up the filled balloons while distracted by the cake.

Nayeon and Sana were setting up the lights on the wall but Sana keeps struggling to untangle the wiring and not tripping on it.

I got our photos together and put them on the bed, forming a heart shape. The photos were taken from trainee days to SIXTEEN days then the present.

Emotions rushed in and I was on the verge of crying, but why would I cry on a happy day? I was so happy to see us go and grow together as both artists and people. I hope I'll see ourselves together for the rest of my life.

She is and always will be the light of my path.

The clock is close to striking 4 PM and we just got done with all the preparations. We already texted Dahyun and Tzuyu about the plan so that they could create a space for the setup.

We were just waiting for the kids to get home.

Everyone was excited and I was getting nervous, almost getting really dizzy.

Dahyun texted us that they were close.

This is the moment of truth.

"We're home!" The maknaes except Chaeyoung said with mischievious smiles.

To what appears as a normal day-off, acting like we're all watching a movie, Dahyun and Tzuyu took a seat with us to tune in rather than the usual routine of taking a shower first.

"I guess I'll take a shower first." Chaeyoung fell for the bait. Hook, line and sinker.

She opened the dim-lit room, but one as bright as my love for her. I tailed holding the cake with a lit candle on top of it.

She was shocked.

"It's our second monthsary, Chaeyoung! Do you like it?" I told her as I shut the door.

She started crying.

"...Do you like-"

I was slapped.

"What's wrong?"

"...Let's" She uttered.

"...break up."

The words that I didn't want to ever hear has came out of . Verbally too.

I was struggling to put up a smile and holding the tears back.

"You're kidding... right?"

"Please tell me you're kidding."

"I'm not... I've been having a crush on this guy at school, he's a lot better than you." She said showing a forced smile.

"But why?" As the tears rolled down on my cheeks.

"Don't you feel scared, unnie?" The strong face that she had, broke down into tears.

"Don't you feel scared that we might be exposed? The media even has news rumors on a same- relationships in an idol group!" She shouted.

"But most of the idol groups do a lot of skinship too..."

"That's what they want you to believe, unnie. Or at least, they're in the same situation as us now. Even Hani sunbae-nim dated a guy!" She insisted.

"This is for our future, unnie."

Chaeyoung was trying to sound mature but her mindset is showing the immaturity of her heart. Why didn't I expect this coming.

"So the pictures in your phone actually meant something more than friendship for you, after all."

"...I'm hoping that he's the right one for you, takes care of you, respects you and loves you."

The fire of the candle went out.

I put the cake in the middle of our pictures.

"Let me do this one last time."

I put her in my arms. Giving her the tightest hug I could give. This feeling... This warmth...

This warmth is what I'm going to miss. 

"I love you." As I told her probably for the last time, in front of her. I kissed her lips. 

She didn't struggle at all. She even gave in to me.

Our lips broke off and she gazed into my eyes. Sending to what seems to be a message of mixed emotions.

"I'm not going to say that I love you back..."

"That will only make me go more crazy for you." She said as she wiped her tears off, taking the cake.

We both went out of the room putting out the fakest smile that we ever could, as if nothing happened.

Everybody was clapping for us. They really supported our decision, but Chaeyoung probably knew better.

Momo was taking most of the cake and we were all laughing.

In the end, I still had a family to go back to. No matter how painful it may be.