A baffling sensation spread across his whole body, sending a cold shiver down his spine and making his heart jump excited but at the same time it felt like a suffocating grip…

… It was all because of that thing.

It was quite curios if you ask Jaebum, the way such odd feeling twitches inside him until he can’t do other thing rather than wonder again and again why he can’t understand what makes him feel so confuse and lost.

After that night in Jinyoung’s room he didn’t have a lot of chances to be alone with his little bandmate; schedules were chaotic and Jackson has been particularly talkative with him. It’s not that he doesn’t like to spent time with his foreign friend, but he doesn’t like to be so away from Youngjae either.

And it was worst if the ghost of those plump, sweet lips were always tickling his mouth; just like the beautiful memory of that cruel dream his unconscious showed him so vividly how could it sound those three little words dedicated to him in Youngjae’s voice was all the time messing with his conscious side.

‘It was just a dream’

He had repeated that heartbreaking phrase in his mind a millions times by now, and at some moments Jaebum was able to believe it. But there was that other side of him that whispers from the darkness that it sounded too real to be a mare construction of his lovesick mind, drowning him in a despairing doubt.

‘It was just a dream…

…It wasn’t’

There was a bloody battle inside him, giving him awful headaches and endless nights without any good drop of sleep. It was a war, a deadly one, and his poor heart was the one in the middle; suffering the slow pass of time without Youngjae and the constant bombing of stubborn words.

And if to all that you add the curiously baffling feeling that thing causes on Jaebum, you have as a result the dangerous cocktail which little by little is disarming him.  

-Good morning, Jaebum hyung!- the soft echo of Jackson’s nice voice reaches his sleepy head slowly, along with the gentle touch of big hands holding him by the waist.

After leaning against the kitchen counter for God’s know how long, his brown eyes look up at those bright ones; finding his friend’s smile way too excited to be the first hours of a long, heavy Monday.

-Good morning…- Jaebum mumbles tiredly, trying to smile along with his friend but in the end his lips just curled up in a fail attempt of sweetness.

Those thick eyebrows frown in front of him in what Jaebum knows as Jackson’s clear expression of concern.

-Is something bothering  you?- and there it was, the fencer’s honest worried question and his big eyes staring directly at him.

Damn, he doesn’t have the heart to lie to Jackson if he looks at him like that.

-It’s nothing really bad.. I’m fine.- it’s all what he can manage to say as his dark, ashamed eyes turn away to hide in some place of the kitchen.

But those hands on his waist travel up, cupping his face in that nice and kind way that pleads him with its only touch to be honest.  And when his nervous gaze meets once again with that sparkling one, Jaebum feels his entire skin shaking.

-Are you sure? You look so stress and tired all the time, leader.- Jackson’s words are careful, yet the afflicted tone on his voice was loud enough to make him realized how serious his friend is.

There was a moment where Jaebum didn’t know what to answer. His mind was suddenly blank and his eyes couldn’t turn away from those brown ones which seem to be begging in the most heartbreaking way for the truth. He couldn’t lie to Jackson no matter what… but under any circumstances he could say the truth neither.

He had reached an impasse, indeed. An awful one, he must add.

-Jackson, don’t worry about it. I’ll be fine… it’s just some little problem.- Jaebum tries to make it sound less important, as his hands softly place themselves above his friend’s warm ones.

There’s a small stab of guilt in his heart as Jackson sighs and nods softly. After all this time, after all the problems they had, as a band and personally, Jaebum knows his bandmate couldn’t push him to talk about something if he didn’t want to.

It’s not that he want to take advantage of Jackson’s kind heart, it’s just that Jackson could never understand.

Who in this world could?

It was still hard to believe even for him…

-Okay, Jaebumie hyung; I won’t push you. But can you promise me something?- Jackson voice is soft but serious yet there was something hiding in those brown eyes Jaebum couldn’t really describe.

-Anything.- the answers slides off his lips before he could even analyze the terrible consequences it could most likely bring; but the guilt on his heart was already haunting him.

-Promise me you will tell me, leader. Whatever it is, you know I could help you. You know I couldn’t hate you, right?- Jackson says, low and careful, as his secret eyes didn’t move away from his.

Uh, it was odd. From Jackson’s words, to Jackson’s glance; passing from that tone of voice and ending in those thumbs brushing his cheeks so slow and kindly.

It was too strange, too out-of-place for Jaebum’s like…

…Everything screams that there’s something Jackson knows.

But what can possibly Jackson know?

“Great, you are getting delusional” Jaebum thinks as a calm, yet sweet smile curves this time on his pink lips. –I promise, Jackson.- he answers with sincerity, watching how Jackson smiles back at him and now all feels like it should.

Who knows? Maybe someday he could get the courage to yell to the entire Galaxy that he is in love with Choi Youngjae…

…Not that it could happened any century soon, obviously.

-Thank you, leader~- at the warm feeling of a whisper caressing his ear his whole body and mind was able to realize the tight hug Jackson was giving him at the moment.

-Uh, it’s okay … there’s nothing to thank.- Jaebum mumbles somewhat nervous, not knowing where to place his hands as the boy hugs him tighter.

It’s not that he is not used to be hug by Jackson, he even enjoys how warm his shorter friend is, but there’s still that something which makes everything so odd and weird once again… What is it? 

His hand finally finds a comfy place on top of the boy’s back, giving it soft pats as the thought of how long this hug is taking crosses Jaebum’s wondering mind. Footsteps echoes softly in the kitchen then, and the grip around his body gets tighter as Jackson has ever hugged him.

And there was that thing again.

That thing making him shiver in uneasiness and uncertainty, making him wonder what did he do to deserve such thing…

…To deserve Youngjae’s eyes glaring at him.

-Good morning…- Youngjae’s low voice hangs in the air, and amazingly Jackson’s arms slowly moves away from his body.

-Hey, Youngjae! Good morning!- Jackson turns around, kindly greeting their bandmate as all the mornings.

But there’s still something estrange… and now it feels even estranger with Youngjae here.

-Did I interrupt something?- his little vocalist wonder, with a darken tone on his voice as his small eyes place on the rapper’s brown ones.

And from where he is standing Jaebum can see a smirk forming on Jackson’s lips. –Of course not, Youngjae.- and there also is a darken tone on his voice too.

It was indeed odd… it was too odd… and he didn’t understand a thing.

Why does Jackson acted so unlike of him? Why is this rare aura around them? Are them hiding something from him? If they are, why? What is it?

And why does Youngjae keeps glaring at him like that? Like if he wants to say something… something important.

Hell, can this gets any better?

-Hyung, snap out of it.- Youngjae’s soft voice hits him hard, bringing him out of his thoughts and connecting their gazes in that tiny distant which separates them.

-W-where is Jackson?- is all what his surprise brain can process to ask as Youngjae’s addictive aroma fills his lungs and soul.

He sees how those small eyes roll somewhat annoyed, act particularly curios if you ask Jaebum.

-Your favorite bandmate has a schedule with the rest of the members; they have just left.- the singer comments with a rare tone of voice to refer to Jackson, calmly walking to the fridge to pour some orange juice in a glass.

Feeling so surprised and confused there are not much things Jaebum can say now. –Oh, well… I will go to… shower…- he mumbles, not really knowing what the hell to do.

Two short steps was all what his feet walked, before a warm hand closed around his arm quickly pulling him back until his hit the kitchen’s counter and sweet, plump lips smashed against his own in a sloppy, sensual kiss.

Tongues ily brushes against each other inside the vocalist hot mouth, as Jaebum’s hands perfectly fit around Youngjae’s waist and his playful teeth nibble tantalizingly on the younger’s bottom lip, earning another cute whimper from his cute vocalist.  

-Wow, it has been a while since you did that.- Jaebum breathes out, watching in delight how the younger boy leans closer for another kiss.

-You were around with your favorite bandmate all this time…- Youngjae whispers against his lips; before giving him a slow and deep kiss which melt him.

But there was still that something in Youngjae’s voice… killing him with concern.

-Youngjae…- he pulls away against his will, looking straight into those small bright eyes. -Is something wrong?- he needs to know, this morning was too odd for him to keep on thinking without having an answer.

But his little bandmate sighs slowly and frowns confuse. -What could be wrong, hyung?- he wonders, like if all was just Jaebum’s imagination.

“I guess I’m delusional after all.” he thinks a little bit amused, brushing off all that estrange situation from moments ago as his mouth gets closer to Youngjae’s plump one.

-I was just wondering. You didn’t ask me ‘why’ today.- he mocks in a low, seductive tone; watching those small brown orbs shining brightly.

There is still something in them… something Jaebum can’t really say what it is.

-Because of that thing I do, right?- but Youngjae’s  playful words surprised him, making his eyes go wide open.

-You know…?- Jaebum wonders carefully, hearing the loud beating of his heart in every single part of his mind.

But when curios words were hanging in his ears said in a serious tone of voice mixed with a little bit of sensual twinkle Jaebum knows there’s definitely some missing puzzle on this game he is playing with Youngjae. 

-Do you know, hyung?-