NEARLY

On a chilly Thursday evening late November, long row of people were queuing in front of the coffee house Coffee & Cake. The air was filled with excited murmurs. Hands were holding champagne colored envelopes. Women and men were all waiting for the doors to open and Hong’s House winter fashion show to start.

Hana watched the crowd from the window. A lot of people had come. Such a good sign. She has had the fear less people will be interested after the incident. Well, some people probably had decided to miss out on the show because of it but there were still a lot of audience. They’ll fill the seats, she had thought relieved.

“Everything is set.” Kyungsoo stepped into the room quietly. He was wearing a shirt and jacket, nothing too fancy, still much more different from how he dresses on weekdays. “The MC has arrived. The coordis are at their places, waiting for instructions. All models are backstage, getting ready.”

“Chanyeol too?”

The designer frowned.

“He’s not a model?”

“He is.”

“You know the answer then.”

Hana pursed her lips. The truth is Chanyeol had sort of avoided her lately. It was supposed to be understandable considering he was having exams and another life besides modeling. And regardless of that, he showed up on time to rehearse and attended all the meetings he was told to. But other than that… she has missed him somehow. They haven’t stopped texting but their messages got shorter and occurred less frequently. And just yesterday, she had offered to drive him to the show but he declined without an explanation. Hana was trying to push the negativity out, however after falling once, she couldn’t help but be more cautious.

Kyungsoo stood next to her.

“Don’t be too nervous. Tonight is going to go well and without complications.”

“Why are you so sure?”

“I am because I’ve witnessed everybody’s hard work to make this show successful. I’ve seen how many times you’ve skipped on sleeping just to make all the clothes fitting and presentable. Why do you have doubts?”

Hana exhaled loudly to compose herself. She felt weak, exactly like how she was not supposed to.

“I don’t have doubts. All you’ve just said is true. It must go well, we’d prepared thoroughly and wholeheartedly. I just… I feel like it’s all sinking in now. I’ve accepted the fact but it is now when I completely feel what it means, you know?”

Kyungsoo put a hand on her shoulder. It wasn’t a good sign. The guy only let his affectionate side out if there was an emergency. Her troubled state probably showed more than she had thought.

“That’s okay.”

“It’s not.”

“It is.” He insisted in a gentle voice then changed back to being serious. “Enjoy the night. You won’t walk down the runway but the things you’d worked on will. You have to steal the show.”

Hana turned towards him with a faint smile.

“You’ve worked on the other part of it. You deserve the spotlight.”

“I’m not media material.” Kyungsoo deadpanned. “Now, let’s go outside and start before the audience falls asleep.”

They left the room and the floor as well, to go down to the ground floor and sneak in backstage. On the way Hana had caught the flash of cameras and had heard people whispering her name. The unsettling feeling in her stomach grew stronger.

Upon entering, they encountered the MC and the stylist first. Heechul smirked seeing the two designers.

“… and here come the stars of the show. Are you ready to party?”

“Hell yeah.”

“Kyungsoo, you should learn match your words with your face.”

“He isn’t party material either.” Hana defended her partner then turned to the other man around. “Hi oppa, how are you?”

Leeteuk grinned widely.

“I’m great. It’ll be my first time hosting a show for you so also a lot excited.”

The girl rolled her eyes.

“We’re nothing special. You’ve hosted bigger shows than this.”

The man has been a TV and radio host and in the last ten years he had gained immense popularity. Without his friendship with Heechul, it would have cost a fortune to get him to this event.

“I’ve worn some of your clothes. You make masterpieces. And the media attention is out of the ordinary. If I fail, I fail big time.” Leeteuk responded with a chuckle. “I’m going to do my best to bring you success though. Do you want to see my lines?”

Hana shook her head.

“I’d rather laugh on your jokes later. I have to go to check on some things before we start too. See you then!”

“Definitely, Hana!”

After exchanging looks with Kyungsoo, the girl went back to the changing rooms. Roles and tasks were divided weeks prior but she has liked to know if everything was set before the opening.

She consulted with Tiffany near the venue about the sound and the schedule and spoke some with other coordinators as well. In a changing room, she stumbled upon Baekhyun, Jongdae and Sehun. They posed for some funny before-the-show pictures to the camera of the hired photographer. A few meters away an intern was struggling with buttoning up Jongin’s jacket. Hana approached them and after saying a few calming words to the girl (named Sooyoung, apparently at her first real, big scale fashion show and first time getting closer to someone as handsome as Kim Jongin), finished dressing the model. When Sooyoung left, she didn’t forget to scold the guy though for being too distracting. Jongin just smirked.

A few rooms further Junmyeon was chatting with Tao. The latter was already clad in his first attire, make up and hair on point. He didn’t look as tense as last time but Hana was sure Junmyeon is there to calm his nerves. She wanted to be there for the Chinese model too. However the conversation seemed private and on the contrary of their promise, Tao hasn’t approached her yet. If he needed time, she was willing to give him.

There was one person Hana hasn’t seen yet but deep inside was waiting for him to appear. When Chanyeol emerged from a room and they crossed paths, Hana startled and stopped.

“Oh, did I scare you?”

“A bit. It seemed like you popped out of nowhere.” The girl explained then seized the other from head to toe. “All set for the real thing, I see.”

She’s seen him countless times over the week in his attire but it always felt like she’s seeing him for the first time. Chanyeol wasn’t more handsome in better clothes and different styling. The care for his appearance just highlighted how genuine he looks, raised attention to his outstanding features. Even in the dim lightning of the backstage corridor, he was glowing.

“Yeah, now I just have to walk.” Chanyeol said in a happy-go-lucky matter. He tried hard but Hana had known him enough now to recognize he’s masking his anxiety with it. “You’re ready too, I see. I mean… you look pretty. You really do.”

The girl averted her eyes to the ground. She was used to compliments – in the world of fashion people were flattering and even more ingratiating. She usually handled them with a polite smile or complete ignorance. Chanyeol’s remarks were on a different page though. They felt out of place and strangely affecting.

“You look good too. I like what Jongdae did to your hair.”

Chanyeol smirked.

“You don’t even deny it?”

“Why would I deny you look good?”

“I mean what I’ve said about… You know what? Nevermind.” The guy snorted. “Sometimes I forget you function differently than most girls.”

This didn’t exactly pass as a compliment. Hana narrowed her eyes.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing.”

“It obviously means something, if you’ve said it like that.”

“How did I say it?”

Hana let out a sigh to restrain herself from fuming. If they keep this up, they’ll just fight which none of them needs before such a big happening.

“You know what? Nevermind… I was looking for you. Actually, I was trying to reach you these days but couldn’t. Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. Things just got busy with school and… yeah, private life matters.” Chanyeol scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. “I’m not mad at you or anything. And won’t disappear before I could flaunt your suit on stage, don’t worry.”

Hana wasn’t worrying about that but she didn’t dare to say.

“You’re going to do great.” She said instead. “You’ve been practicing hard and put in a lot of effort. Obviously people will notice you’re new but they won’t think for a second you’re an amateur. Just keep in mind what we’ve taught you through these weeks and first and foremost, bask in the momentary shine of fame when you’re out. It won’t last for long. But it’ll fill you with satisfaction and give you such energy which will help you go on your path confidently. Don’t be tense. Instead await your moment to come, be excited. You have every reason to be.”

Chanyeol crooked a smile as the girl reached the end of her speech.

“How do you always know what to say?”

“Intuition, I guess. And with you somehow it’s even easier.” Hana mused then snapped back to reality. “Anyway, the point is, you’ve got everything to close the night with success. Just relax, okay?”

“Okay.”

Despite of his agreement, Chanyeol looked still quite anxious in Hana’s eyes. She took a cautious step closer to him and searched for his eyes with hers.

“Is there anything else I could do for you? I might be your boss in some sense but I consider myself more on your side. I’m willing to help you with anything, just say it.”

Hearing that, the look in Chanyeol’s eyes flamed. With such intensity, it made Hana unsettled a bit. They kept eye contact for a long second but then the guy slowly shook his head.

“It’s really okay. You’ve encouraged me enough already. Thanks, Hana.”

The girl watched Chanyeol’s retreating back with a feeling of disappointment. She had tried to do her best but for some reason she felt like she hasn’t done anything she could have.

* * * * *

Hana took her place next to Kyungsoo as the show started. Leeteuk did a good job at firing up the audience – a few restrained chuckles ran through the coffee house after some well-aimed, slightly sarcastic jokes. Finishing his speech, the MC gave a cue to the head engineer and the chosen music began to play.

Interns made some last-minute touch up but overall the long row of models were queued up and ready to take the stage. Arriving to the assigned starting point in music, the first one – Jongin, as per usual, in an imposing pinstripe suit, looking finer than wine – went out.

It was the point it really started. Hana didn’t dare to take a side glance and ogle what the audience’s reaction is. Unfortunately she couldn’t shut her ears. A few hushed whispers, some deliberate scribbling and continuous clicking sounds from media could be heard over the music and reached backstage as well. She tried to think nothing of them though, just looked ahead firmly and watched how the coordis instructed models to change and interns to act.

The situation made her remember the first time she was presenting an outfit for a show. It wasn’t even an outfit actually; she had got just some work done on a back of a suit jacket. It was very minor but her heart was beating loudly in her chest when the model with the pattern she made on his back entered the spotlight. Without Boss’ encouraging smile flashing at her, she would have fainted for sure.

The memory was vivid and realistic. She saw the pattern clearly, felt the excitement slash nervousness from before and most importantly, the smile seemed coming alive. “Good job, Hana”, Boss said. “I’m proud of you.”

Hana got back to reality when a hand covered hers on her knee.

“Are you here?”

“Of course.” She answered instantly, not wanting to worry Kyungsoo. “Don’t watch me, watch the show.”

They both did. When it was Chanyeol’s turn, Hana was sitting on the edge of her seat. Those thirty seconds he was out felt like forever. The audience went silent too fueling the girl’s anxiety further. Chanyeol arrived back in one piece, his forehead glistening with sweat. Hana stood up and was about to hurry to him but Heechul was standing in the way.

“Not now, baby. Talk to him after the show is over, he has to go out together with others, you know.”

“I know but –“

“No buts.”

The girl sat back to her place frustrated.

Everything went smoothly. The models one by one finished their walk then gathered in front of the entrance and came out altogether. Hana only started to loosen up when the audience’s clapping filled the coffee house.

“We did it.” Kyungsoo murmured to her in a warm voice. “Good job.”

The girl smiled back at him strained.

“Yeah. Good job.”

Soon the models finished their last round. They congratulated each other or groaned in bliss it’s finally over. Using the commotion, Hana successfully slipped away from watching eyes and skimmed to the tall model standing on the side.

“Chanyeol.”

He turned around. His pupils were blown, he was gasping for air. For a second he could have been mistaken as not feeling well but she has known those symptoms. He was still dealing with the adrenaline of performing.

Hana didn’t hesitate more and with a few steps, hugged him close. The action felt natural. It made the hollow from before filled in.

“You were great. I haven’t seen you outside but… You were good. I’m proud of you.”

Chanyeol was seemingly taken aback by the sudden rush of emotion and even more by the sudden skinship but putting his surprise aside, hugged the girl back with a smile and ran a soothing hand across her back.

“I did what I was told. I just walked.”

“You don’t know but you’ve done much more than that. Thank you, Chanyeol.”

For a moment none of them said or did anything. They just stood there, arms around each other. Well, Chanyeol had no complaints.

They didn’t stay alone long though. Kyungsoo marched over there from the other end of the room in a second; eyes throwing daggers at the couple.

“We don’t have time for this. Hana, you’re supposed to be on stage.”

“I won’t go out.”

“Don’t speak nonsense. Come on, everybody is waiting for you.”

This time around the girl didn’t even answer. Chanyeol looked down at her worried. She was still holding onto his shirt strongly, hiding her face. She didn’t look stage ready at all.

“If she doesn’t want to –“

“You have no right to be part of this conversation.” Kyungsoo said in a strict voice. “Stop being a girl, Hana and get yourself together. You can’t break down now!”

By this time, the designer’s voice had raised in volume, gathering attention from the people at the scene. Heechul, the supposed to be main coordinator of the night, stepped in with a tired expression.

“Alright, alright. I’m here to save the day. Kyungsoo, you go out. New model whose name I can’t remember yet, take the girl to a room and try to pamper her right.”

Chanyeol nodded dutifully and started to drag the shaken Hana towards somewhere peaceful. Kyungsoo would have stormed after them but Baekhyun and Jongdae were next to him and could successfully hold him back.

“Let me go. She has to –“

“She doesn’t have to do anything, ‘Soo.” Baekhyun interrupted him emotionlessly. “Put down your mad hat and greet the crowd.”

“But –“

“This is the only solution we have right now.” Jongdae cut in. “And you’ve worked on this just as much as Hana, if not more.”

Heechul tapped the expensive watch on his wrist.

“Time is ticking, bad reviews are written, people.”

Kyungsoo closed his eyes for a second then shrugged of his friends’ hold and entered the stage.

Sehun and Jongin, who had been in a changing room until now, were surprised to find a gloomy atmosphere emerging.

“What’s going on?”

Baekhyun shrugged and exited the hall. Heechul followed him with a smirk. Jongdae was left with two confused models but all he could do was slowly shaking his head.

* * * * *

“What a surprise, right?”

Luhan lifted an eyebrow at the woman’s question but didn’t say a thing.

“She was supposed to show up but Do Kyungsoo appeared instead of her.” Jessica continued while leisurely steering the wheel. “I wonder what happened. Did she get sick? Did she chicken out? I place my bet on the second option. Hong Hana is nowhere as intimidating as she carries herself. She’s probably crying backstage now.”

“You enjoy her misery too much, noona.”

“I don’t care how she is. But I’m happy over the fact the show didn’t go as planned because of her.”

“What makes you say that? Maybe that’s how it was planned from the start.” Luhan opposed. “Do Kyungsoo is one of the main designers at Hong’s House. I don’t doubt what we’ve seen today got out from under his hands. He’s the rightful heir.”

Jessica rolled her eyes.

“I know that. You don’t have to lecture me, Han… But maybe I should lecture you. What we’ve seen today has ‘Hong Hana’ written on them in bold letters. I recognize this style everywhere. She’s the one who should have come out. Something is definitely off.”

Luhan looked outside to the city night with a bitter feeling. He has expected a lot from this show. Ever since he stopped working for Hong’s House, he’s had a certain longing growing in his heart. He hoped tonight will put out that feeling. Well, it just fed it more.

Seeing Jongin and Sehun walking down the stage gracefully in fitting suits reminded him of the times he had done the same. Seeing Kyungsoo bowing to a clapping crowd had him thinking of the long hours spent in his room, standing still while he was stitching and checking the way the suit hang on his body. Not seeing Hana made him worrying about her. No matter how cruel Jessica could be, she was partly right. The girl loved designing too much and has been too dutiful to miss out on an opportunity like this. Something was not right.

“I’m glad Kris couldn’t come.”

Jessica glanced at her employee from the corner of her eyes.

“That makes the three of us.”

Author's Note
Here is how the show went down... Not how you've expected, right? I threw in some drama~ I understand if you're confused over a lot of things - most of them will be explained in the first half of the next chapter. I have to ask you to be patient, sorry. ^^ If you have any thoughts about this busy chapter, don't hesitate to tell me them in a comment. I'm still waiting for your deductions! Subscribe if you like the story so far ;)

Until next time, take care!
chloris