Don’t try to hide; I’m scared of your cold eyes

I saw the light that is you, you can’t be caught

Don’t let go of my hand

When morning comes, when I meet someone, I feel it-

The colour of the world without you is boring

Mrs Cho refuses to let me go anywhere but the hospital. She puts us in a taxi, and sits in the passenger seat only after she is satisfied that both Jonghyun and I are safely in the backseat.

I no longer see her as the old woman who asked me once to read out the ingredients of milk; as the woman who was convinced that her dead husband was living under the drains.

“How bad was it?” Jonghyun asks me.

I shake my head, unable to respond. How do I tell him how scared I was? How do I express, in mere words, the enormity of what I felt?

“Bad.” I answer instead. “I could hear…”

The world.

But my throat closes up.

“It’s okay,” Jonghyun says, and takes my hand in his. “It’s okay.”

~

Dr Lee isn’t in the hospital, so we have to wait till he comes. Jonghyun sits by my side while Mrs Cho goes to get us some coffee.

“I’m sorry.” I say.

“What for?”

“For bringing you into this.”

“No,” Jonghyun looks at me firmly. “It’s not your fault.”

This brings tears to my eyes. I might get dehydrated today, from how much I’ve been crying.

The taxi pulls up in front of the hospital, and Jonghyun gets out first. He holds his hand out to me, and I shove it away. What does he think I am- disabled?

He has a s