He couldn’t remember anything at all about the accident. When consciousness kicking in, a jolt of pain went through all of his body parts especially his head. It was throbbing badly until he gritted his teeth trying to hold it in with eyes prying opened. When his vision had cleared, he saw Jinhwan sitting beside him with a red tears-stricken face.

“J-Jinhwan hyung…” Bobby called out for the older; snapping Jinhwan out from his reverie. The latter smiled gratefully with tears gathering in his eyelids when he saw waking up. Jinhwan helped Bobby to sit properly and the younger was baffled watching him cried.

“Hyung, are you alright? Are you hurting somwhere?!” He asked urgently while hands roaming on Jinhwan’s face to rub the tears away with his thumbs.

“I’m fine, Jiwon-ah. I have been waiting for you to wake up. Thank God that you are okay.” He said it with a sad smile lingering on his lips. Bobby frowned deeply looking at his hyung. For some unknown reason, he looked extremely small tonight with the small cuts and blisters damaging Jinhwan’s handsome face.

“Hyung, what happened to us?” Bobby asked trying to grasp the situation. He saw many paramedics around the places alongside polices. Suddenly, the throbbing of pain came again and Bobby began to remember what had happened before. The van, screams and bloods; memory box was starting to function again. His heart sank to the pit of his stomach and he felt cold when his thoughts came to his other members. “H-hyung, where are the others? Is everybody okay?”

“Jiwon-ah, I’m sorry but … I don’t know.” Jinhwan explained with another flood of tears coming through. “I really don’t know where are the others right now. Hanbin was here just now but then he ran to nowhere leaving me and you behind.” Watching the crying Jinhwan made him felt so bad. Bobby really hated it when Jinhwan cried. He quickly wrapped the petite figure of his hyung in his embrace. His hands were around the older boy body while his eyes searching frantically for any sign of the others.

Bobby was examined once again by one of the paramedics after they saw him waking up. The two remaining members then sat on the roadside waiting for any news about their members when a policeman came to them informing that they had found one of their missing members. He took them to the other side of the road and Bobby and Jinhwan ran as fast as they could when they saw Junhoe lying on a stretcher beside the road border.

The sight of the younger with the cast on his right leg and left arm, bloods and bruises all over his body sent another wave of tears to Jinhwan and Bobby. The oldest tightly held on Junhoe’s hand in desperate attempt to let him know that he was not alone. A few minutes afterwards, a group of medics, firefighters and polices running to them with another stretcher. Hanbin and Yunhyeong were with them.

When the stretcher was placed right beside Junhoe, Bobby felt how the air was snatched away from his lungs when he saw Chanwoo lying lifelessly on it with numerous cuts on his face and body but the most disturbing thing to see was the slight bump on his chest that was covered with a blanket. A male medic was applying pressure evenly and much carefully to the wound on his chest. More blood was flowing out profusely from the wound. Bobby had to hold on Jinhwan’s hand and blocked his view of the maknae when the oldest seemed to almost faint.

Everything that happened next was a blur to Bobby. Without his realizing it, he was separated with Hanbin, Yunhyeong and Chanwoo as he was ushered to another ambulance alongside Jinhwan and Junhoe. While on the way to the hospital, Junhoe kept murmuring incoherent words that they couldn’t understand but Bobby managed to catch on the other members’ name including Chanwoo. Jinhwan hadn’t stopped crying ever since he saw Chanwoo and Bobby was worrying to death over the younger. He cried hoping for Chanwoo to stay alive.

His eyes squinted shut when the lights greeted him in view. The blinding white lights from the ceiling sent him another headache but it was bearable than the painful throbbing before. A female nurse came close to him and greeted him warmly. She kindly helped Bobby to sit and the first thing he asked to her was his other members whereabouts. He was sure that he wasn’t alone before and that Jinhwan was walking with him to the emergency room.

“Your small friend was here just now. He received treatment for his slight cuts and burns and he waited beside you. He just left a few minutes ago. Your other friend is over there beside you.”

At the mention of ‘other friend’, Bobby quickly averted his gaze to the direction the nurse was pointing to only for his eyes to widen in shock to see none other than Song Yunhyeong laying on the hospital bed right beside him. “Yunhyeong!’

Bobby rushed down from the bed then to Yunhyeong side. The latter was sleeping peacefully. His face was scratched with cuts and the upper of his lips was stitched. Bobby thought that it would be hard for him to talk afterwards like usual with the black color thread in his lip. Bobby hoped that they stitched him when he was still unconscious.

His unintentional scream just now had managed to make Yunhyeong stirred in his sleep. He opened his eyes and Bobby was smiling in relief watching his same age friend still breathing the air. He was about to call for him again but the words caught in his throat when Yunhyeong suddenly sat up in fast motion then grabbed Bobby’s arm harshly. His pale face and frantic eyes were startling Bobby out.

“J-Jiwon-ah, w-where is Chanwoo? Where is he?!” Yunhyeong inquired to him. His action resembling a mad man. “Hold on, Yunhyeong-ah. Calm down. Don’t panic.” He tried to calm down but unfortunately it only made things worst. Out of a sudden without him realizing it Yunhyeong had already pulled his collar and he kept asking where was the maknae. Bobby was afraid of him and thankfully the doctor and the nurses rushed to their side in no time. They pulled Bobby away from Yunhyeong and sedated him. Bobby was out of breath when the struggled was over.

“It looks like your friend experiences shock symptoms after the crash. Don’t worry, he is sleeping right now and next time when he wakes up he will be fine again. Please be careful next time sir.” The doctor’s words only worrying him more about Yunhyeong. Bobby then decided to wait beside the latter watching his friend sleeping with a frown plastered on his face. Bobby would be lying if he said that he wasn’t scared of Yunhyeong earlier.

He waited beside Yunhyeong for about an hour when Yang Hyun Suk walked through the emergency room with a few staff tailing behind him. Bobby couldn’t describe how happy he was to see the old man there. He hugged Bobby and patted his back encouragingly. “Jiwon-ah, are you alright?” He asked carefully earning a nod from Bobby. He was so glad to see him again until no words were able for him to utter.

“Sajangnim, have you seen the others? How are they?” Hope was building up inside of him. He prayed in his heart to hear a good news.

“I have met Hanbin and Jinhwan outside. They are waiting for Junhoe and Chanwoo in the surgery room. I haven’t see Donghyuk yet but Lee Jae Wook-shii has just texted me and he said Donghyuk is fine. He is sleeping right now.” Bobby was happy to know that at least the others were safe and sound yet the mention of the two maknaes sent another gush of worries in him.

“Where are you going?” Yang Hyun Suk grabbed hold of his arm asking him when Bobby suddenly walked past him. “I’m going to see Junhoe and Chanwoo. I need to see them.”

“Jiwon, no. You can’t. They are in the operation theater at the moment. You can’t enter the room. You have to wait for them.” He felt how heavy the weight placed on his shoulder. Bobby hated it the most to wait. The uncertainty of it made him sick. He had enough of the time he had to wait when he was in trainee years.

“I have called your family. They will come soon.” The mention of his family didn’t help to soothe him down at all. Watching the sleeping Yunhyeong beside him was even more heart wrenching. He missed his mother so much and couldn’t wait to see her soon but he was impatient to see the maknaes again.

He went outside to the hallway after Yunhyeong was sent into the patient room. He walked to the surgical waiting room and there he saw Hanbin and Jinhwan sitting on the chairs with Yang Hyun Suk at the other corner of the room talking with someone through the phone. Hanbin was the first to notice his presence and Bobby felt his heart breaking in pieces when he saw how red the leader’s face and eyes were. He sat beside the younger and wrapped him in his embrace protectively. As if on cue, Hanbin started to cry the moment his face met Bobby’s chest. Jinhwan joined the hug afterwards.

Bobby knew that he didn’t need to ask anything to know about it.

A few hours passed by and he came again to the waiting room after meeting the doctor with his mother to talk about his CT Scan result. Luckily he had no internal injuries. The pains all over his body were more than enough to bear with. His hold on his mother’s hand loosened when he saw Junhoe wheeled out through the hall. He was trying to get closer to him but the nurse pushed him slightly to the side giving him a small space to see the younger face only.

Junhoe’s father then came closer to him and he patted on Bobby’s shoulder saying that he could visit the younger soon when he was stable enough. He gave the man a small smile before he bowed to him and Junhoe’s father then walked away following the nurses.

The doctor told them that only Junhoe’s family was allowed to visit him. After he was sent to the ICU room, Jinhwan followed Yang Hyun Suk to visit Yunhyeong with his family and Yunhyeong’s family along. Bobby couldn’t grasp the unexplained stiff air around them but he knew it better to stay silent. The only thing that he knew was that Chanwoo was still inside the surgery room. He stayed behind and waited with his family, Hanbin and the leader’s mother.

Bobby asked Hanbin what did the doctor told them about Junhoe and he inquired if there was any news about the maknae. The silence that was thrown by Hanbin made him furrowed his brows in confusion. Flood of worries came eashing through him but Hanbin’s mother was kind enough to tell him that Junhoe was fine and that Chanwoo will be out soon. Bobby didn’t know whether his eyes and head were creating illusions or the eyes of Hanbin’s mother shook in fear when she mentioned Chanwoo’s name.

A half an hour passed but Jinhwan and Yang Hyun Suk were still not back yet. Bobby was left behind with Hanbin while their mothers went to the cafeteria to buy something for them to eat. Bobby was feeling uneasy about Chanwoo.  He tried to ask Hanbin about it but the leader beat him to it.

“I feel guilty, hyung.” Hanbin’s voice was soft and quite but with the silence lingering around them it was audible enough for Bobby to hear. “I shouldn’t have scolded him this morning. What am I thinking? He was tired and he worked so hard to dance while I was being such a jerk to him.” Bobby realized that Hanbin was talking about the incident that happened in the practice room that morning. He looked carefully at the leader’s face and Bobby could see a glint of guilt and sadness in his eyes.

He was observing the side profile of the younger when Hanbin tilted his head to his right. He met Bobby’s eyes and it was only then that Bobby realized Hanbin had been holding his tears. “I don’t want him to die yet, hyung. H-he can’t die. I still haven’t apologized to him.” The words coming out from Hanbin’s mouth made Bobby turned silence. His eyes were burning up too but he held it in. He patted on Hanbin’s back and whispered comforting words gently to ease the crying leader up.

Bobby didn’t know whether he felt sad that Hanbin was breaking apart or that Chanwoo was getting near to his death. Or perhaps it was both of it alongside the feeling that he was so stupid and foolish for being so weak to stop the accident from happening in the first place.

Nothing could describe the emotions turmoil he experienced when the doctor told them that Chanwoo couldn’t live the next sunrise if he didn’t have a lung transplantation. The simple thought of it was breaking Bobby’s everything. Lung donor was indeed a hard task to find and he knew that it was seldom for anyone to give their lungs away. Bobby wept out so hard on his mother’s embrace in front of the others. Sobs and hiccups were heard echoing in the hall where everyone else was crying over the maknae’s fate. He saw how Jinhwan broke in tears on his mother’s lap and Yunhyeong plopped down on the chair; hands grasping his head with his family members hovering over him worrying about his c