~TAEYEON~

I couldn’t breathe. I felt as if someone was squeezing my heart in a vise.

I wasn’t going to lie. I’d half expected it, known fairly well this day was coming and had tried to prepare myself for the inevitability of it. Alas, the thought of moving on and leaving Hayi, who was like my own child, was more than I could bear.

I struggled to find my voice. “I suppose you’re right.” I managed to say, forcing the words past my lips, keeping my gaze focused on the tea cooling in my cup.

“The most practical solution would be to hire a nanny for Hayi.”

“A nanny.” I repeated, lifting the cup to my lips. “How long do you think it will take to find someone suitable?” I asked, ignoring the ache throbbing in my heart.

“That, I don’t have any idea. I thought I’d start by putting an ad in a few newspapers and go from there. Of course if you’re anxious to get back to Jeonju, I can ask Yoona if she could baby-sit Hayi for me during the day.”

“No!” the word came out more sharply than I’d intended. “I mean, I’m not in a hurry to get back. I call my publisher yesterday and he told me I doesn’t have anything for me at the moment.”

“You don’t mind staying on a little longer?”

“No, I don’t mind.” I replied, refraining from adding I’d be happy to stay forever if he ever let me to.

Jiyong smiled and I felt my heart skip a beat in response. “Thank you. You’ve been more than generous staying as long as you have. And presuming I do get a few replies, would you be willing to look over them? I’d appreciate your input.”

“Yeah, sure.” I replied, pleased he’d asked for my help, yet at the same time unhappy I’d be choosing my own replacement.

Jiyong leaned back in the chair. “So, tell me. how many books have you illustrated?”

“A dozen.” I said.

“Wow! I’m impressed.” Jiyong said. “What kind of books have you illustrated?”

“Children’s picture books.”

“I’m not familiar with those.” He said. “But having Hayi around wil change my reading habits, I imagine.” He smiled. “I’d love to see your work. Have you always liked to draw and paint?”

A little disconcerted by his interest, I toyed with my teacup before answering. “From as far back I can remember, I was happiest when I had crayons or pencils and scraps of paper in front of me.”

“I, on the other hand, don’t have an artistic bone in my body.” Jiyong said. “I can’t draw stick men. Mind you, I was probably one of those kids who had more fun chewing on crayons, rather than drawing with them.” He started to laugh.

“I hope your mother took the crayons away before you got sick.” I said, joining in his laughter. The cheery sound flowed over me, lifting my spirits a notch.

“That was the baby-sitter’s job.” Jiyong said off handedly.

“Baby sitter.” I repeated, catching something in his voice. “Did your mother leave you with a baby-sitter often?”

Jiyong met my gaze and I noticed he was no longer smiling. “As a matter of fact, she left me with a baby-sitter most of my childhood.” His tone was ice-cold.

“What about your father? Didn’t he ever baby-sit?” I asked lightly, and watched as Jiyong’s mouth tightened into a thin line.

“My father didn’t bother to hang around long enough for us to get acquainted.”

“Is that why…?” I broke off abruptly. “Sorry, it’s really none of my business.”

“Were you going to ask if that was why I was so adamant to track Hayi down?”

I nodded.

“The answer is yes. I wanted to find my daughter and bring her home. That’s the only way I could be absolutely sure she would receive the kind of love and attention she deserves.”

The intensity in his voice started me, but before I could comment, he hurried on.

“I didn’t want a child of mine to go through what I’d gone through. My mother was a budding actress. She thought nothing of dragging me from audition to audition or leaving me with strangers at odd hours of the day or night, or dropping me off a friend’s rented room where at times I was ignored or worse, neglected.” Jiyong pushed back his chair and stood up.

“How awful!” I commented, scarcely able to believe what he’d told me. But there was no mistaking the echo of remembered pain and anger in his voice.

I could see the tension in every line of his body and for a fleeting second, I was tempted to reach out and offer comfort, not to the man, but to the hurt little boy still residing somewhere deep inside.

“I vowed my daughter would never have to endure a similar fate.”

“But Taerin wouldn’t have dragged Hayi around like that, would she?”

jiyong spun around, his eyes ablaze. “Not if I had anything to do with it.”

All at once Jiyong’s anger evaporated. He raked a hand through his hair. “I’m sorry.  I know the two of you must have been close, but you’d have to agree, when it came to her career, Erica was nothing short of obsessive.” He sighed. “There was a time when I’d actually hoped…” he broke off abruptly. “This isn’t getting us anywhere. “ He said. “I’d better write up that ad and call it in.”

I was silent as I watched Jiyong leave the kitchen. I’d heard the sorrow and the regret in his voice. What had Jiyong been hoping for?

Could his anger and frustration simply be a camouflage he used to hide his true feelings for Taerin? Had he regarded Taerin’s return to Seoul as a sign showing her willingness to reach a new understanding, perhaps a reconciliation?

~JIYONG~

“Excuse me Mr. Kwon. Another resume came through in response to your ad for a nanny.” Sunny said as she entered my office.

I frowned as I looked up from the file I’d been studying. “What? Sorry, Sunny, I wasn’t listening.”

“We just received another resume to your ad.”

“Oh…thanks. Toss it with the others.” I turned my attention once again to the file.

“Shouldn’t you read them?”

I glanced up. “I am reading…oh, you mean the resumes?” I quickly amended. “I’ll get to them later.”

“You said that yesterday and the day before, Mr. Kwon.”

“Did I?” I leaned back in my leather chair. “Pass them to me, would you?”

Sunny picked up the small bundle of unopened envelopes along with the resumes and gave them to me.

“How many resumes are there?”

“Eight to be exact.”

I scanned the top of my desk in search of the letter opener. “Oh, thanks.” I flashed a smile when Sunny handed me the brass opener.

“Uh…Mr. Kwon?” Sunny began hesitantly.

“Yes?” I slid the opener along the first envelopes.

“I’m leaving now for my OBGYN appointment.”

“You are?”

Sunny sighed. “I told you on Monday I had a monthly antenatal check up with Dr. Bae Thursday afternoon. That’s today.” She said, a hint of exasperation in her voice.

“Oh…right! You’re having a baby soon. I remember. You’d better be off. I know Taecyeon would kill me if I were to keep you here any longer.”

A burst of laughter escaped from Sunny’s lips. “Well, I’m sure he would. See you tomorrow, boss.” Sunny said before withdrawing.

I opened the envelopes one by one, and stacked the sheets of paper on top of the newly received resumes