I didn´t know what to do. My body was trembling and my legs were wobbly. I looked horrible and was feeling even worse. I had no idea what they were talking about by the table for the past twenty minutes. All I was doing was drinking one glass after another. I couldn´t take it, my nerves were making me go insane. The stress was too much, there were too many people in my house in the wrong moment of my life. And now I was standing in the bathroom after I threw up and all I wanted to do was to die.

“Seriously,” Donghae sighed and grabbed a dry towel. He stood behind me and pushed the towel into my wet face. Once he was sure, I was clean he threw the towel on the ground and turned me around.

“Why didn´t you tell me, huh?” He asked and I was looking at him scared and confused.

“Tell what?” I mumbled completely lost.

“I guess you weren´t present this past half an hour, were you?” He rolled his eyes and grasped my shoulders. I was startled at first but Donghae began massaging me slowly.

“You should have told me that you wanted to show me the choreography,” he rubbed my upper arms and my body finally began relaxing. “I was so angry that you were proud of something as insignificant as being the fifth guy from the right on the stage. I could barely see you, you know.”

“But still,” I mumbled and looked away.

“Yeah, still you were really good,” I jerked and when our eyes met again, I noticed him smiling at me.

And then I couldn´t hold it anymore. This was what I wanted to hear all along. Yeah, I´m weak, stupid and selfish but hearing somebody praise me is just this overwhelming. Or maybe it´s because of Donghae that I feel suddenly so calm. My eyes began tearing and before I knew it, I was already sobbing.

“Dummy,” Donghae sighed again and came closer. He hugged me very lightly and was patting my back. I think he wasn´t used to hugging people and so I didn´t push him any closer, even though I really wanted to. Instead I gripped the checked shirt on both his sides and continued weeping like a widow. I really needed to let it out. Even, if it was embarrassing. Even, if it was in front of Lee Donghae.

“Stop it already, it´s weird,” Donghae murmured and I chuckled lightly.

Then he gave me a piece of toilet paper and I blew my nose into it. Cleaning my face once again, I was ready to live again. I opened the bathroom door and Kangin with Yesung were standing in the living room with the ordered chicken. I wondered who paid for it, because I didn´t.

“What were you two doing there?” Kangin jokingly wiggled his eyebrows.

“Hyukjae was crying,” Donghae immediately ratted me out. Great. I could already see two pairs of worried eyes fixed on me.

“What happened?” Yesung asked putting the chicken on the coffee table. I was wondering what to answer. Probably that I drank too much and felt sick? Or that my stomach hurt? Is that a good lie?

“I made him cry,” the man in the checked shirt next to me answered as if nothing.

“You what?!” Kangin pushed the plastic bag he was holding into Yesung´s arms and strode through the whole room towards Donghae. “Say it again!”

“He was joking, I´m fine!” I jumped between the two men. “Really!” I threw a huge smile in the game too and hoped it would work.

“It wasn´t funny,” Kangin huffed and returned to the coffee table. I sighed in relief but got startled right away again when I felt Donghae breathe on my neck from behind.

“I wouldn´t forgive you, if you let him hit me again,” he whispered into my ear. Today is such a tiring day.

As always when it comes to food, the mood got much better once we all took a bite of the chicken. Even my stomach sounded pleased that I wasn´t feeding it only soju. I began listening to the actual conversation going on at the table and with embarrassment realised that every few minutes it would be the talk about me. Is that how Donghae found about the choreography thingie? Just how much must have I been out of it before?

“By the way, Hyuk,” Yesung smirked, “I´m sure I told you to treat me for dinner and not the opposite.”

“Uh, sorry about that,” I bit my lip, “I will treat you the next time, I promise.”

“You better, you scrooge,” he laughed and Kangin added his loud ringing voice to it. Even Donghae snorted and I wondered, if I wasn´t saving my money a bit too much after all.

It was sometime around three in the morning when I realised that my body had enough for today already. Because I wasn´t actually sober and because I felt like there were only my friends in the room, I decided to take a nap. Just a few winks of course. That´s how drunk people think before they pass out. I was leaning with my back against the sofa and tried to discreetly close my eyes. I did fall asleep very fast but still I managed to notice that my body collapsed from the previous position. Yet I wasn´t awake long enough to greet the landing.

I woke up only in the morning when a sunray landed right on my eye. I frowned and tried to change the position but it was very hard, I couldn´t move very well. I wasn´t the type to have a severe hangover but right now I was feeling pretty nasty. Probably because I didn´t stretch after yesterday´s performance. I ripped my eyes open but then I got the shock of my life. There was Donghae´s face right above mine!

“Huh?” I blinked and the brunette began waking up from his weird sleeping position. The tips of his hair were tickling my nose and I could feel him breathe on my chin.

It took me some time to understand everything properly but when I did, I was very much surprised. There was only Donghae and me in the house. The latter was sleeping in a crooked position on the ground with his back against the sofa and legs under the coffee table. I was lying much more comfortably with my head on Donghae´s thighs and the rest of the body on the carpet. Both Donghae´s hands were on my chest and stomach emitting a warm feeling into my cold body. Opposite to the reflex, I stayed in my position and watched him.

“Ungh,” Donghae whined in his sleep and then his head made a slow round. Then it reclined, which was enough moving to wake the man up finally. He opened his eyes and shook his head. I could feel the warmth leave my tummy when he raised his hand to rub his eyes. After that Donghae looked into his lap and with surprise found there my head. He only sighed.

“When did the guys leave?” I croaked with my morning voice.

“Right after you passed out,” Donghae´s voice was equally raspy.

“Why didn´t you go too then?” I asked genuinely curious. I thought he fell asleep too, whilst ending up abandoned, and that´s why he stayed. If the others went home, he should have gone too, right?

“Because you fell asleep on me,” he growled a little annoyed.

“It´s not like you couldn´t just shove me aside, I didn´t want to fall on you,” I said because it was making less and less sense to me.

“I couldn´t,” Donghae then hissed, “you looked tired and I didn´t want to wake you up so I didn´t move.”

I didn´t know what to say. I couldn´t believe Donghae could do a nice thing like that. Just because I fell asleep on his lap, he didn´t have to stay still for the next six hours. That´s too much. But I felt very grateful towards him. I´m not sure how I would feel, if I woke up all alone in the messy apartment with this aching body of mine. It was a precious moment for me, I would never forget it.

“Thank you,” I whispered in the end and made sure to look into his eyes. He should know that I´m aware of the sacrifice he had to make for me. Donghae blushed and looked away.

“Just get up already,” he barked pouting.

“I would have done so long ago, if I could,” I replied and had his stare on me again. This time it was curious. “My muscles are all sore from yesterday because I skipped the exercise. Wanna carry me?” I joked at the end because I thought it could give him the right reason to shove me away finally without feeling guilty. But…

With determination Donghae tucked his arms under my torso and gently mumbled ´okay´.

Fanservice:

Sungmin: Without the 12 members I felt like there wasn’t a strong supporter by my side. I feel like there’s a place in my heart that’s empty.

Good evening! I decided to update because it´s 11/06 and you know what that means, right? I´m glad the chapter is kind of warm today. Thank you for reading and happy anniversary! - PandaHero