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  I keep running even though my legs hurt and my chest burns from the whole hour spent of pure running. I'm panting so much that my throat feels dry. A rest and a drink would be the best thing that could happen to me right now. 

  But I kept running because I'm determined enough. Determined enough to beat my last record. 

  I'm seconds away to beating my record and I felt like any moment I could just collapse in the threadmill and rest. I waited for minutes to get my goal and then slowly stopped the  threadmill. 

  I kept walking around the gym for the next minutes then did my cool down exercise. When I got finished, I drank the water in the bottle and finish it then headed to my next destination. The Church.

   When I got there, it was so empty that you could almost see no people. I went inside the church, looking at my shoes.

  I was dressed into a hoodie, a short and a wedge for my shoes which I changed into a while ago. It's not like I'm in the church to pray, I'm here to remind me the pain of my supposedly happy wedding.

  Just as I walk, I remember the cashier girl at the fast food chain where I was usually at before. I don't know why but every single time that I'll be ordering, she will be the always one to get my order in different places. Even though she knows I'm a regular costumer, she can't look at me in the eye. She likes me.

  She was always cautious on me. She always blush every single time and I find it very adorable. What's even more adorable is she's not giving my change by handing it to me but instead she will put it down near me. On the day I found out she likes me (because it's obvious and she really has that cute look on her face) was also the only time she handed me my change.

  I remember her because she was someone and not just anyone in my life, like Taeyeon. Partly because she was one of the people who had feelings for me. But she was not like Taeyeon. Taeyeon broke me. She did not. 

  I walked out of the church with a heavy feeling in my chest and remembered another special character in my life. My friend in Singapore who happened to have a lot of connections with me more than I thought could happen. We knew each other since High School and we never stopped communicating until today. 

  He said that he kind of had a crush on me before but threw it in a trash can after he saw me so close with someone. Yeah, jealousy strikes. He's very straight-forward and kind that I want to punch him and cuddle with him at the same time. He's like a big brother to me already. But I never saw him since High School so I kind of forgot his face already. Every time I will ask for his picture, he would just say, "Don't blame me if you'll get crazy for me when you see me." with a very annoying smirk emoticon. 

  I miss him already. I haven't had a normal converstaion with anyone yet since that day. Except with Ms. Jessica, if that's what you call normal. I haven't find a new job, too. I resigned in my work just the day after our supposedly happy wedding because he works there too and I didn't want to see him. 

  We had been friends since like, forever, and then he cheated on me! What a very nice move. I love him very much that it pains even just thinking of him or when he passes my mind every now and then. 

  I sit in my car's driver seat and withdraws the sketch pad out of my little bag, looking at the past sketches. There was a sketch of the back of a girl showing the blonde braided hair with some flowers adorned to her hair. She was showing her bare shoulders.

  The next is the first drawing of Ms. Jessica which contains unicorns, rainbows, garden and people who seem to be so innocent. The drawing was so pure and innocent that I almost burst into tears, if I can cry. She colored it well, too. 

  At the back of the drawing was the opposite of it. There were buildings, cars, accidents, smoke, and a very hot sunshine. Almost no people were in the sketch but when there are, those are gangsters who tries to kill each other.

                 It was good. 

  I closed the book and the car to start looking for a new job. It took me hours to find for the likely jobs and when I did, I was so glad to find it and immediately had an interview and they told me to answer my exam then I could go. They would call me if I'm accepted. 

  Before I took the exam, I saw familiar eyes looking at me in pure admiration that it looks so cute. I don't know how it is possible for me to be familiarized with the eyes only. But I did familiarize with her eyes. 

  A figure in hello kitty head band with mask covering the mouth. She's wearing a black long sleeve dress. Cute, I know.

  After I took the exam for the new job (hopefully), I went straight to the cinema to watch the latest movie. It was One flew over the Cuckoo's nest. Well, yeah. I know it was still before, I'm just kidding. And I wasn't going to the cinema too. I will watch it in my house. 

  I called my parents and my sister and told them to go by my house to bond. They all agreed and said they'll be there soon. I was happy enough because I haven't talked to any single one of them and missed them with all my heart and soul. Soon enough, I was already in my house and was setting up the television.

  There was a knock on the door after I brought out the snacks and drinks so I went for it. They were all there in a line, starting from my sister to my mom then to my dad, grinning at me. I feel like I miss my sister so much, like I haven't been with her most of my life. 

  But yeah, this is the first time I get to see her again after 6 years. So I guess I really have the right to feel this.

  I wanted to hug them and say sorry but I don't think I can. I'm not clingy to most people, only to Taeyeon and a bit to my bestfriend.

  I gestured them to come into my house. My sister hugged me tightly in her arms and kissed me in the forehead a lot of times saying she's sorry. I just patted her back and told her that it is okay. 

  As I guide them to the sofa, I can't help but feel foolish for I haven't realized till now that they are still here for and with me. I also realized that I love them so much, like I haven't thought and considered of that for a long time. 

  I just sat down and started the movie, then they sat beside me. I decided to lean my head on my dad's shoulder when he put his arm around me. I remembered that my dad used to tell me to watch this movie. He said that it was one of those great movies you should watch rather than those non-sense movies we usually watch. 

  I figured that after we watch this movie, I'm going to open up to them. I suddenly felt a heavy feeling in my chest like if I won't tell it to them, I don't know who to tell anymore