He said that he kind of had a crush on me before but threw it in a trash can after he saw me so close with someone. Yeah, jealousy strikes. He's very straight-forward and kind that I want to punch him and cuddle with him at the same time. He's like a big brother to me already. But I never saw him since High School so I kind of forgot his face already. Every time I will ask for his picture, he would just say, "Don't blame me if you'll get crazy for me when you see me." with a very annoying smirk emoticon. 

  I miss him already. I haven't had a normal converstaion with anyone yet since that day. Except with Ms. Jessica, if that's what you call normal. I haven't find a new job, too. I resigned in my work just the day after our supposedly happy wedding because he works there too and I didn't want to see him. 

**

  I feel so dumb. And fooled. And played with. Controlled. A waste. 

  I felt like with all my mom said, there's still more of what I should know. Like she purposely skipped the other important details. For what reason, I don't have a clue. Blues Clues, help me. Please. 

  It's like knowing your ex-crush (who had a crush on you) has a crush whom he is M.U with. Only a lot times more painful. Only a lot times more confusing and sorrowful. Plus. You don't have anyone you could trust and you don't have a team mate.

  Like you're purposely meant to be feeling that you're alone.