N showed up at my door bright and early that next day. “Good morning!” he called from just outside, rocking back and forth on his feet right at the edge of my door frame. He was thankfully dressed just as casually as I was, in loose jeans and a slightly oversized t-shirt. He had dyed his hair to a dark auburn, a nice change from the fake dirty blonde he was sporting earlier.

“I like your hair,” I pointed out as I gathered my notes off of my desk, glancing over my shoulder to give him a brief little smile. My own red hair was tied back as usual.

At my comment, he self-consciously patted at his head; checking for strays, no doubt. “Thank you!” he finally answered, beaming as he smoothed down his perfectly tapered sideburns. 

“Are you ready?” I managed to cradle my unkempt stack of papers in my arms as I stood properly, giving my desk chair a little kick to get it out of my way. Gingerly stepping around my only half-unpacked suitcase, I met him at the doorway.

With a nod, he gestured for me to follow him. We went down to the lobby, and then down another set of stairs to a basement I had never seen. It had been totally outfitted with several studio rooms with what could only be a production room in the center. “What do you think?” he asked proudly, sweeping his arm wide across his body, as if he were presenting me some grand prize on a game show.

I couldn't help but smile. "Actually," I began, craning my neck to peer at every corner of the main room, keeping a close on on that production studio in the center, “This is really nice,” I mused as I looked in the window of each recording room. I found the one with the baby grand piano tucked into the corner. “Can we use this one?” I asked, doing my best to point from under the unstable burden in my arms.

“Of course,” N grinned as he flipped on the lights in the room in question and opened the door for me. When I walked in, I paused to look in wonder- the piano was beautiful. I gently set my papers on the small, flat area next to the music stand on the piano before moving to inspect it. The glossy black lid was propped open, revealing the beautifully organized bronze coil strings. My fingers were whispering over the laquered edges of the instrument when N's voice brought me out of my reverie, “I guess it’s a silly question for me to ask if you play.”

His comment was curious- and there was something that had been on my mind for a few days. "You know, N," I spoke, turning around to lean my hip into the gentle curve of the piano. "It seems like you guys know very little about me," I accused, crossing my arms over my chest. I had been told at least one member of the group was apparently a fairly avid fan, and yet I've yet to see any evidence of that.

He laughed nervously, glancing around with his dark eyes, as if looking for an escape, “We all knew OF you, of course," he assured me, wringing his hands in guilt. "We had all heard at least some of your music.”

My laughter was light as I was amused by his genuinely apologetic face. "I'm not upset, N," I reassured him, waving my hand at him dismissively, “It's just that your management told me it was one of you who asked for me in the first place,” I paused. His expression suddenly dropped into something resembling a cross between dread and fear. He knew what question I wanted to ask, and judging by how flustered he was just at the mere suggestion of the issue, I decided to let it go. "I won't ask," I finally spoke, smirking slightly, "But I'll find out on my own." 

Relieved, his shoulder visibly relaxed as he let the tension go, a calm, cheerful smile returning to his face, his eyes curving almost cartoonishly into upward crescents. “Shall we?” he finally offered, pulling up one of the black plastic chairs to sit in properly, his back perfectly straight, hands resting on his knees. The guy was clearly ready to go.

"Let's do this, then," I replied with a slight nod, pushing my hip off of the piano to take my spot properly at the bench, my fingertips ghosting over the keys. I grabbed for my stack of papers, isolating the sheet music I had prepared for this session. As anticipated, N was an absolute joy to work with. He was agreeable, listened well, and took criticism gracefully. It was almost too easy. I had him run through some scales and basic harmonics, some different rhythms and tested the limits of his ranges. “Gosh, N,” I sighed after exhausting my ideas on what to work on, swiging my leg around to stradle the bench in order to face him better. I leaned forward, resting my elbows on my knees as I brainstormed more ideas. We had consumed most of the day, but I yearned for more work, “You pretty much nailed everything I threw at you.” Despite my best efforts, my voice sounded downright disappointed.

He must not have noticed my meloncholy tone, as he flashed me his bright, horizontal smile at me again. “Thank you!” He was nearly breathless at that point, but still managed to sound as cheerful as ever. I could tell he legitimately enjoyed singing, which was a good sign. It was always easier to teach a student that loved what they were doing.

I thought back to my original criticisms, rubbing my face as I spoke, trying to gather my thoughts, “I guess you just need more practice singing live." It was a little bit frustrating that we couldn't properly practice that, but I had to just let it go. Perhaps I would be able to see one or more of their live performances for me to critique. Or perhaps once we got to the rehearsal stage, I could address it again. I let my hands drop back to my lap to look back at him, throwing him another bit of praise, "As long as you hit your cues, you’re on point. You’re seriously the backbone of this group.”

He waved his hands in front of his face, “Stop, stop,” he insisted, but his widening grin betrayed him. He was loving the bombardment of complements. “Well, just so you know,” he said casually, shifting uncomfortably in his chair, “Once you figure out everything with the music, don’t forget to call me for choreography help.”

Ravi had already told me that choreography was N's forte, but I decided to play dumb. “Oh?” I asked, feigning incredulousness, tilting my head slightly, my loose ponytail falling over my shoulder, “And why would I do that?”

My tone of voice must have betrayed me, as his grin never faded, “Well, for one,” he hopped up out of the chair, walked to the piano, and leaned his forearms on the side of it, looking down at me, “Everyone listens to me.”  His voice was so matter-of-fact that I laughed quietly. He did have a point, though. I had observed him enough to see him in action. Usually, he was just maternal, running around doting on his bandmates or ensuring everything was alright. But sometimes, when he really needed to, he managed to radiate an unusual aura of authority, despite being the shortest of the bunch by far. He wasn't short, per se, as he was my height, but he still was dwarfed next to the likes of Ravi, Leo, and Hyuk. It said a lot about his character that he was still able to exert his level of leadership anyway. “And another thing,” he continued quickly, “I know what everyone is capable of.”

“Well," I closed the lid over the piano keys so I could prop my elbows on it, holding my face in my hands as I looked up at him, "I would have figured all that out on my own eventually."

It was his turn to laugh, “Well, I’m not sure you would survive that process.” We both chuckled at this, and he sighed contentedly, "And I don't just mean musical ability. Personalities matter, too." I nodded quietly at his words in silent agreement. We were quiet for a moment, but he broke it after just a few short moments, “Plus, I who wouldn’t love making their little brothers jealous?” When I rolled my eyes, he leaned closer to continue, “I mean it, Mira, all five of them are being passive aggressive spending time with you.” He paused to think, “And by that I really just mean that they’re all grumpy that Ravi is so comfortable with you already.”

I shrugged, lifting my face from my hands to stretch my back as I spoke, my voice slightly strained, "Well, at some point, everyone's going to have to get comfortable with me." I paused to sigh as my stretch ended, my back cracking in a few places, "Or this process is going to be pretty painful."

After a moment of contemplation, he spoke again. “Well, I like you,” he said very matter-of-factly as he removed himself from the edge of the piano, as if he had made some final decision.

“According to Ravi, that’s a pretty good start for me.”

“It is!” he said confidently before sticking out his hand forcefully. “Cha Hakyeon”

At first I was unsure what he was saying, the two words completely foreign to me. I thought perhaps there was some slang I missed in my Korean lessons. And then it hit me, and I felt like an idiot. He was introducing himself- his name. After a moment’s hesitation I took his hand, “Halley Browne.”

He paused, my hand still in his as he whispered to himself for a few seconds, “Uh,” he smiled sheepishly, “Mind if I still call you Mira?”

I figured it would be difficult for them to pronounce my given name. “As long as I can still call you N sometimes,” I bargained. Despite my initial misgivings, I had grown used to calling him 'N'.

“Deal.” 

I took a deep breath again before making a decision, “There’s not much else I can do with you, but since you’re the first and the leader of the group, what can you tell me about the rest of them?" When his brows knitted together in hesitant confusion, I decided to explain, "Anything you need to warn me about? Ravi gave me a little rundown of what to expect, but I’d like to hear what you have to say about it.”

 “Hmm,” N’s smile faded as he thought quietly for a moment. “Leo tomorrow, right?” he asked, his eyes looking up at me through his dark lashes. When I nodded, he sighed gravely, “Be…” he paused, “gentle- or careful." He paused again, shaking his head lightly. "Or both. I don't know how he's going to do with you. He’s got that serious face, but he can get emotional pretty fast." Once again N stopped to think, looking away from me, out the studio window into the dark lobby. "If you break his trust, it’s really hard to get it back," he concluded, his voice unsettlingly serious.

 “He doesn’t trust me to begin with,” I mumbled offhandedly.

 “You’ll have to earn it, then." Hakyeon's voice was extremely insistent, and he took a step forward towards me. "He’ll resist you the whole way if you don’t.”

Deflated, I could only watch him from my seat. “Any advice, then?”

He sighed reluctantly, slouching heavily as he spoke, “I wish I could give you advice, but I have no idea how you’ll have to do it.” His sheepish, apologetic smile didn’t soothe me.

I shook my head, trying to let the subject go. We needed to move on, “I’ll figure it out. What about Ken?”

He let out a long, stead breath, clearly glad to be rid of the subject of Leo. “Oh you two will be fine,” N lightened up immediately at the mention of Ken, “Just don’t take his flirting seriously." He smirked slightly, eyeing me knowingly, "Though I don’t suppose I needed to tell you that.”

He was right, and I couldn't help but laugh, “Yeah, that was something I learned real quick.”

Growing a little but more serious, N's face softened as he spoke, “He does get frustrated with negative criticism, though, so treat him like a new puppy. Positive reinforcement.”

I nodded slowly, mentally taking note before speaking again, “Alright, well, I feel like I’m prepared for Ravi, but is there anything he’s been hiding from me?”

“As much as they’re all like my brothers," N seemed hesitant to complete his sentence, but I watched his face as he seemed to come a conclusion, "Ravi is probably my best friend around here. And he can sing really well,” N said while his chin gently in thought, “like exceptionally well. He doesn’t like to admit it for some reason. Don’t be afraid to push him.”

“Alright, then. Hongbin.”

N shook his head, “Please,” he said emphatically, “try to convince him he deserves to be here." We both fell quiet. As much as most of the advice had been mostly benign and superficial tips, we both knew that he was deeply affected by this one. In line with what Ravi had told me, this was something that needed to be addressed on both a personal and professional level. I wasn't sure if it was going to be up to me.

I nodded slowly. “We'll see about that one,” I was noncommittal in my words, careful not to make promises. At least I did have a plan for Hongbin. “Then what about Hyuk?”

N lightened up as he thought listlessly, “Hyuk is like a fresh block of clay that hasn’t dried yet. He just needs some direction.”

“Got it,” I paused to close the piano lid gently, “Well, I guess I’d better get rested up for tomorrow.”

Suddenly, N quickly stepped toward me and wrapped me in a strong hug, his thin, nimble arms were surprisingly strong. “Good luck,” he murmured, the forcefulness of N’s slightly concerning. I was motionless for a moment, as I was not expecting a hug, but then I relaxed and returned it. He gave me a reassuring squeeze. He really thought I was in for a hard time. Only time would tell.