The next several days were increasingly brutal. At first, the boys managed to remain enthusiastic, but when I forced them to repeat the same parts over and over, sometimes alone, sometimes together, they definitely started getting frustrated. Having been in this industry for a bit longer than them, I was able to shut down my emotions and all sense of time, but they were still fresh. It was difficult for them, and I knew that. But I had to press. Getting the final mix was the top of my priorities right now. Once the song was mixed, mastered, and produced, we could move on to the million other things they wanted to do, like work on the video, the choreography, and the promotions. But it all boiled down to this- this week of hell.

Finally, after a grueling four days of pushing and pushing, I managed to get every sample in every form that I asked for. I felt like I was living in the studio, but that wasn’t about to change, either. On the fifth day I simply locked myself in the mastering studio and got to work. This part was way more fun than bullying the boys to get what I wanted, but I was exhausted, so I worked slower than usual. Every now and then, one of the VIXX guys- usually N- would show up to feed me, but they didn’t dare speak to me for more than a few brief moments. Each time the door closed behind them, I said a little plea to myself, hoping that this wouldn’t set our relationship back several steps.

I had pretty much finished the full mastering of the instrumental by nightfall, but I felt myself start to fade. Soon after, I had fallen asleep right there in my chair. It wasn’t particularly comfortable, but I was too tired to care. I’m not sure how long I had been asleep, but I briefly regained consciousness at the sound of voices. I couldn’t speak or move- I was just too far gone. Instead, I felt myself get gently lifted out of the chair. More voices. And then, just like that, I passed out again just as I felt myself start to move again.

When I managed to stir again, I was faintly aware that I was back in my room. It was totally dark now, save for the bit of moonlight that cast a dark glow over the walls. I wasn’t in my bed. My mind was slow from sleep and exhaustion, and putting together the facts was only confusing me. I was in the comfy chair that I had named my visitor’s chair. But the fabric I felt was not the relatively course weave of the chair’s fabric. My eyes adjusted to the light and I nearly leapt up right then and there. But thank goodness I didn’t, because I wasn’t really sitting on the familiar chair, I was sitting on someone who was sitting in the chair. I managed to come to the conclusion that I was still being held. Finally I gained the courage to look up.

I wasn’t sure whose face I was expecting to see there, but Taekwoon wouldn’t have been my first guess. He was fast asleep, his head rolled forward slightly onto his chest, his dark hair barely brushing my forehead as I looked up. Why was he still here? Why had he not just plopped me on the bed? Questions swam through my brain until I suddenly felt a cramp in my hand. Oh. That’s why. I had an entire fistful of his shirt in a death-grip. I must have grabbed it instinctively when he picked me up. I carefully let go, my knuckles sore from the constant strain. That’s when I had to decide what to do. The sensible thing to do would be to squirm out of his grasp- to separate us as soon as possible. And yet, as with every opportunity given to me, I wanted to stay close to him. My heart pounded at the thought. My usual rationale was that these opportunities were so rare that I had to take advantage of them. However, that logic wasn’t working anymore. Leo wasn’t the untouchable enigma he once was. In fact, he had warmed up to me considerably. If I was honest with myself, I enjoyed feeling this kind of closeness. I just needed to decide if it was closeleness with him in particular that I wanted, or just closeness in genera. An image flashed through my mind: Ravi’s eyes, shining with unshed tears as he pulled away from me outside my room that night. That felt like an eternity ago. And now there I was, cradled in Leo’s arms in the darkness.

Don’t do this, Mira, I coached myself. It’s not fair to either of you, you can’t just use Leo as a Ravi-rebound. I looked up into his peaceful sleeping face. He was breathing evenly, his lips ever so slightly parted. Even in sleep, he managed to hold me steady in his arms. For reasons unknown, I felt safe there. I thought about just staying put, but doubt clawed at my mind. What would happen in the morning? He would probably feel awkward around me, maybe even forever. Then again, if he had really wanted to dump me on my bed and leave, he could have. But he was just too nice to do that. I had his shirt in my vice grip, and there was no way for him to get rid of me gently. Right as I came to the final conclusion that the right thing to do was to scramble out of his lap, he suddenly flexed in his sleep, pulling me tighter against his body, his head moving so that his forehead resting lightly on the top of my head. With a little sigh, my resolve melted away. There was no way I was going to move now. Instead, I allowed myself to relax into him, once again letting sleep take me.

When I finally woke up, I was mildly surprised to be in my own bed. Instinctively I looked to the chair, now empty. A wave of disappointment washed over me briefly. I rubbed my face, trying to wake myself up properly. I was still in yesterday’s outfit, and I felt rather nasty. After a much-needed shower and a change of clothes, I felt ready to head back down to my little dungeon. However, I felt compelled to find Leo to thank him for bringing me home, and also (mostly) to gauge his general state. Would he be embarrassed? Awkward? I didn’t know, and I wanted to find out. But I couldn’t just stroll to the VIXX apartment and ask for him without reason. Plus, I was still in work mode, and had promised myself I wouldn’t mess around with the guys until I was done. Thinking hard, I came up with a plan.

Hesitantly I knocked on VIXX’s door, only to be met with a surprised Hyuk face in the doorway. “Mira!” he sounded so happy, I instantly regretted my decision to come here, but it was too late now. “Are you all done?” he asked hopefully.

I grimaced, trying to force an apologetic smile, “Sorry Hyukkie,” I sighed, “I lost one of my recordings. Can I borrow Leo?”

His face fell, but he nodded, disappearing behind the door silently. I leaned against the wall patiently until finally Leo emerged from the apartment, looking at me expectantly, “Good morning,” he spoke quietly, as usual. He seemed wholly unaffected. So much so, that I was thrown off for a moment.

“Uh,” I stammered, “Good morning.”

“Shall we?” he asked, gesturing for us to walk. I simply nodded, and we walked side by side as we always did. As if nothing happened. And maybe that’s because nothing really did happen. I suddenly realized that I had been pretty silly to expect anything from something so simple, positive or negative.

Regardless, I couldn’t hold it in anymore, so as soon as we crossed the threshold of the studio, I him, “Thanks for bringing me home last night.”

He blinked at me, clearly startled. I saw him start to flush slightly, and he glanced around, as if he were looking for somewhere to hide. “How did you know it was me?” he finally managed to squeak out the words, looking anywhere but at me.

Of course, I was supposed to be asleep the whole time. He clearly had hoped I just would have no recollection of the entire ordeal. I stayed silent for a moment, choosing my next words carefully, “I heard your voice,” I lied, “when you first came to get me.” That reminded me of something. There had been two voices. “Who was with you?”

“Hongbin,” he responded quickly. A silence fell over us, and I began to feel uneasy. “You’re welcome,” he spoke suddenly, a tiny smile crossing his face finally.

I breathed a little sigh of relief. Just that tiny smile was enough to placate my fears of permanently damaging our fragile relationship due to some silly sleepy shenanigans. I decided to keep it to myself that I knew he slept with me in his arms. As far as he was concerned, I only remember being picked up and waking up in bed. “Sorry to drag you down here,” I suddenly remembered where we were, “I actually just wanted to thank you, but since you’re down here, want to hear the finalized backing track?”

“Already?” he said in amazement as he pulled up a chair.

I nodded, “Pretty much. I just need to adjust the dynamics once I get the vocals in,” I flipped my laptop back on.

“How long until you think you’ll be done?” he asked suddenly as my software was still booting.

I laughed once, “I didn’t take you for the impatient type,” I glanced at him from the corner of my eye.

His face stayed serious as he looked at me, causing me to face him properly before he spoke again, “We’re all a bit worried.”

I wasn’t expecting that to come from him so sincerely, but a smile crept up on my face, “Well if things go well, I might be done today.”

A genuine little smile crossed his face, “Any way we can help?”

“Keep me fed,” I joked, turning back to the computer. “Now listen.” I opened the nearly finished backing track and hit play, letting it run through the room’s speakers as opposed to my monitor headset that I had grown accustomed to. I watched his face, looking for any hint of a reaction, but he was stoic as ever until it was over. When I raised my eyebrows expectantly, he legitimately grinned.

“This sounds like a movie soundtrack,” his voice was excited, and he scooted closer, peering at my laptop.

“Thanks, I think,” I laughed as I scrolled through the different sound channels, shifting the little computer so he could see it a bit better.

Leo finally looked at me properly, his voice falling quiet even by his standards. “It’s good,” he assured me. We spent a few minutes going through all the different channels I had organized. I even had some presets ready for importing the vocals. He looked at me, his eyes incredibly gentle. I returned his gaze, pleased by how genuinely happy he looked. As much as he wasn't quite the stony, emotionless jerk I had first met anymore, these moments of tenderness were still rare and precious. But then, very suddenly, he stood, “I should leave you alone now.”

Before I could object, he was gone. I sighed quietly to myself, considering that it was probably for the best. There was a lot for me to get done that day, so I decided to get to it. However, I found myself a bit sluggish, my mind otherwise occupied. I was starting to feel a slight sense of loneliness that I wasn’t used to. If I had to guess, I had grown used to hanging out with the guys every day, and forcing myself into mostly isolation was harder than I expected. Thankfully, a diversion came in the form of a text message. Quickly I grabbed my phone to take a look.

‘Did they lock you away again? Haven’t heard from you in a while,’ Taemin’s message read. I couldn’t help but smile a little. It was true, I had generally kept in touch with my new young friend just about every day, but in my focused work I had neglected him as well.

Quickly, I moved to reply, ‘Self-imposed this time. Trying to get this track done before I let myself out.’

‘Well I’m sorry to hear that, because we’re on our way!’ his response came quickly, but it took me a moment to register exactly what he had said.

‘NOW? WE?’ I texted back frantically.

‘Sorry in advance,’ was all I got. I frantically looked around the messy studio, trying to figure out what I needed to wrap up before I had to run upstairs to meet Taemin plus whoever he thought was a good idea to bring here. Turns out, I didn’t have the luxury of planning anything. I heard the door slam open in the main studio lobby, only briefly seeing two figures through my little window.

And then the door to the mixing room swung open, and a man, very slightly taller than me, burst through. His slightly long, shaggy dark hair didn’t hide the slightly crazed look in his eyes as he stepped forward, “You are SO GORGEOUS!” he cried in hilariously accented English.

“Thank you,” I managed to stammer back, looking around the man at Taemin, who looked out of breath behind him.

“Mira,” Taemin spoke, gesturing to the visitor, “This is Kim Heechul, second oldest member of Super Junior.”

The man, Heechul, turned to look at Taemin, making a grating noise with his voice, “You had to say oldest? I prefer second-in-command.” He turned to look at me again, a giant grin crossing his face. I couldn’t help but notice that he looked quite a bit like Taemin. They had the same toothy smile, at least, and slightly effeminate faces. But I re-processed Taemin’s introduction in my head. Second oldest in Super Junior meant that this guy was over 30. He looked barely a few years older than 21 year-old Taemin. I couldn’t think on it too long as Heechul stepped forward and hugged me, “It’s so nice to meet you!”

“Pleasure to meet you, too,” I replied, giving Taemin a slightly panicked look. From the way he shook his head, it would appear this is just how Heechul was, so I hesitantly returned the hug.

“Sorry to drop in on you like this,” Heechul continued to speak, not sounding particularly sorry at all, “but when I heard that little twerp Henry invited Kyuhyun and not me to his little meet and greet with you, I wouldn’t stand for it.” He spoke alarmingly fast, almost too much for me to handle.

“I’m sorry hyung,” I heard Taemin say sadly, “It was short notice, and-“

Heechul cut him off, “I don’t blame you Taeminnie,” he said affectionately, “I’ll get those buggers when they get back from China.” He turned to me again, eyes bright, “And you get to be on Wookie’s radio show soon, right?”

I had absolutely no idea what he was talking about. There was mention of a radio show, so I just jumped to the conclusion that it was the same one, so I simply nodded. “Heechul hyung,” Taemin pushed himself around Heechul to stand beside me, “we shouldn’t stay long.” He gestured vaguely to the room we were in, "She's working."

“I got to see Mira in action,” Heechul pondered, looking around at the equipment in the room, seemingly ignoring his younger counterpart, “I heard you’re working with VIXX?” he asked me.

“Yes,” I spoke slowly. He was in Jellyfish HQ at this very moment. It seemed like a strange question.

“Aish,” he whined, “So lucky. They’re very talented, you know.”

Finally, my laughter broke through. It was refreshing that he was saying I was lucky, “Yes, I know.”

“Where are they?” he asked quickly, looking around.

“Upstairs, I imagine,” I offered, looking to Taemin for help once again, but he simply shook his head.

As if on cue, I heard hurried footsteps down the stairs. Heechul and Taemin turned to greet our new company. I took the moment of their distraction to let loose the breath that I had been subconsciously holding throughout this entire bizarre encounter.

“What’s going on down here?” I heard N attempt to use his authoritative voice, only to have his usual chipper tone instantly follow up, “Oh it’s Heechul!”

I removed the headset around my neck, replacing it carefully before heading out into the main studio lobby where everyone thankfully had gathered. I stuck close to Taemin as Heechul fussed over N as if he were a mother hen, “It’s so nice to see you!” it seemed this man was easily distracted.

“Is he always like this?” I whispered to Taemin beside me.

His dry laughter was all I needed, but he responded, “Always. He’s ten years older than me, but still has more energy.”

“Taeminnie are you talking about me?” Heechul turned to us again, “How rude!” he cried, but his grin gave him away.

“Hyung,” Taemin sighed, “We have been awfully rude. Maybe we should head back home,” he suggested.

“Okay, okay,” Heechul’s attention finally fell on me again, stepping toward me to rest his hands on my shoulders, “It was really nice meeting you.” His voice was suddenly very warm and kind. The emotional whiplash was disorienting. Regardless, the kindness was certainly appreciated, and I smiled back at him.

“Likewise, Heechul,” I responded in kind, reaching up to touch one of the hands on the shoulder, “Thanks for coming to see me.”

This seemed to satisfy him, and he stepped back, looking at Taemin expectantly. The younger man sighed, looking at me apologetically again, “It was good to see you, Mira”

“I’ll talk to you later,” I promised as he steered his older friend out the door.

It left me and N alone in the studio, where I collapsed into one of the chairs. “You’re just a magnet for trouble, aren’t you?” N asked, chuckling as he sat beside me.

I gave him a little sideway glance, groaning a little as I spoke, “Seems that way, doesn’t it?”

“Powerful friends you’re making, though.”

“Friends is a strong word."

N looked to the open door of the studio I was working in, “How’s the work going?”

“I was pretty distracted, to be honest,” I admitted, “So it’s a bit slow today.” There was a short silence as we both sat there in the studio, “I’m not leaving here until I’m done with it,” I spoke, maybe a bit too suddenly as N nearly jumped to look at me.

He settled down a bit, smiling at me again, “Just don’t stress yourself too much,” mommy-N began to emerge again.

“I miss you guys,” I admitted with a long sigh, “So I want to be done for now.”

He wrapped an arm around me, pulling me and the chair I was on closer into a little hug, “We miss you, too.” He released me, standing abruptly. “Work hard!” he practically shouted, pumping his fist as if he were encouraging an entire platoon of soldiers.

Holding back my laugh, I stood as well, giving a confident nod, “Of course leader, I will do my best!”

He hugged me properly this time, both of us laughing softly. “I’ll tell the guys to leave you alone,” he said quietly.

I couldn’t help but laugh, “Please don’t,” I started, pulling away from him, “every time you say that, I get at least two visitors wondering why you told them to leave me alone.”

Nodding in understanding, N gave me one last little wave before he turned to head back upstairs. “Good luck,” he threw back, his face peeking through the crack in the door as he closed it behind him.

“Okay,” I breathed to myself, trying to shake off the strange events of the day. “Not leaving ‘til it’s done,” I whispered as I got myself settled back in my chair, putting the now familiarly comfortable monitor headset back on. It was very difficult to keep my mind on track at first, but mastering the vocals was sort of like when I needed to write an essay in high school. I hated getting started, but once I dove in, I just needed to stay in the zone, and it would be over in no time.

It broke my heart to add any sort of distortion, detune, or doubling effects on any of their vocals. Luckily I was able to keep it to a minimum since their variety of vocal tones and harmonies allowed me to make a large sonic space without having to take drastic measures. Competing with my backing track was difficult, but I had accounted for that in the composition, so I just kept on track, trusting that the vocals would be able to shine.

I had made a pact with myself not to look at any of the clocks in the room: laptop, phone, wall clock. I didn’t want to know how late it was or how long it was taking me. The only passage of time was my percent completion alongside my fatigue. I was nearly done but my will to continue was waning fast. I was just so incredibly tired. But then I got a text. It was breaking the rules to read it, but I was fading, and the distraction was welcome.

‘Still awake?’ The guys and I had exchanged phone numbers a long time ago when I had first arrived, but there had been no need to communicate that way before since we were pretty much always together, or within close reach. Getting a text from Leo felt strange. Once I got over my initial confusion, I laughed quietly to myself before responding.

‘Yes. No need to carry me away yet.’

‘Okay.’ And that’s all I got. With a shrug and a renewed sense of urgency, I got back to working. Some time passed, and the phone lit up again. ‘Still awake?’ showed up again. I responded in the affirmative, and once again only got an ‘Okay.’ What I guessed to be about an hour later, the cycle repeated again. Was he staying awake for my sake? I couldn’t stop to think about it, I had work to do. Luckily, I was just about done. With the final touches added, all fatigue was gone and adrenaline took over. I listened to the final mix about five times, growing more excited with each playthrough. As I was about to start packing up, one last ‘Still awake?’ text came through. I decided not to answer, and waited in my chair.

Like clockwork, the footsteps on the stairs alerted me to my new company. He opened the door slowly, quietly, and stepped through. When he caught my eye, he sighed, his face making that I-just-smelled-something-sour face I hadn’t seen in a while. “You’re still awake,” Leo sighed.

“It’s done,” I said simply, gesturing him to sit next to me, my grin taking over any other expression I might want to make.

His apparent distain for my trickery disappeared immediately, “Done?” he asked as he slipped into the chair beside me. I didn’t say anything else, just moved the headphones from my head to his. They were probably pretty sweaty by now and my ears physically ached from the relieved pressure, but I didn’t care. All thoughts and feelings were now in that music. The music I wanted him to hear. Once the track started, I saw him jump a little. The volume was certainly too loud for him, but one again, I didn’t care. I wanted him to hear everything.

The song was so ingrained in my head that I was practically able to listen along with him. He remained perfectly still for the entire three minutes and forty five seconds of the track. When it was over, I found I was biting my lip and leaning forward, eager for his thoughts. Yet, he remained still for a long moment before looking at me, something unfamiliar in his eyes. Very slowly and deliberately he removed the headphones and reached for my laptop. “Taekwoon?” I asked, slightly panicked as he unhooked it from the mass of equipment.

He didn’t stop to look at me, he simply spoke with urgency, “They need to hear this.” Carrying the laptop while it was still open, he pushed through the studio door and headed for the stairwell. Frantically, I picked up what he left behind, flipping the lights off behind me as I scurried after him, running up the stairs to catch up with him.

“Leo,” I called to him, “what’s wrong?”

Finally, he paused, looking at me square in the face, “I’m not the best with words,” he said simply. “Anything I say will not be enough,” was all he said before he began to climb the stairs again. I felt my face begin to burn. It was about as genuine of a compliment as I could imagine coming from Leo. The fact that he needed the rest of s in order to justify my work was touching, to say the least. My heart soared at his approval. I didn’t have time to properly reflect, as he was taking the stairs two at a time with those long legs of his, and I needed to keep up.

Once we made it to the VIXX apartment, he roughly pushed the door open, flipping on the hallway light. He handed me my laptop before making a beeline for Ken and Hongbin’s room. I followed behind, stopping at the threshold of the dark room. Leo roughly flipped the lights on, and I saw the two bodies in the double bed begin to stir.

“Jaehwan,” Leo spoke in what I could only assume to be his roughest voice as he reached out to shake the nearest body. “Jaehwan!” he suddenly shouted, causing the body in question to shoot up.

“Oh god what’s happened?” Ken’s voice was panicked. I didn’t blame him. I honestly didn’t know Leo could shout properly except in case of emergency. Ken’s head swiveled around wildly before he spotted me. “Mira?”

I heard Leo growl angrily as he spoke, “Jaehwan help me wake everyone up.”

Ken looked to his nightstand clock, “Taekwoonie-ah,” he whined cutely, “It’s after three in the morning.”

Leo was having none of it as he grasped the front of Ken’s baggy shirt, “Help me,” he spoke again, “The song is finished.”

At once, Ken hopped out the bed, “It’s done?” he threw the question to me. I only dared to nod lest I interrupt Leo’s rampage.

Striding back to me, Leo gently took the laptop back from me, “I’m not so good at waking people up,” he said meekly. And all at once I remembered how easy Ken had made it seem. I suppose that explained Leo’s choice.

It took mere moments before the five groggy members of VIXX all stood in the hallway together, half-excited, half-aggravated at being woken up so rudely. “Ravi, can we use your sound system?” Ken asked, stifling a yawn himself. We all moved into Ravi’s room, where I hooked up my laptop to his rather extensive set of speakers as the boys all got comfortable piled on the double bed. I opted to sit on the floor with the laptop next to me so I could watch them. Without a word, I simply hit play.

Ravi’s stereo filled the room with sound, and it felt wonderful to be surrounded by my own music. When Leo’s voice came in, I simply closed my eyes and listened for the rest of the song. I normally would have gotten sick of a track by now, but I was still loving it. As the song ran its course, I was happy to find that there was nothing I had to urge to go back and fix. It was as close to perfect as I was going to get- for now. When it was all over, I slowly opened my eyes.

They were all looking at me. Instinctively I shrank back a little bit under their stares. “Holy ,” Ravi finally murmured quietly. “That was,” he tried speaking again.

“Amazing!” Sanghyuk came alive finally, sitting up on the bed. “That was incredible!”

I relaxed, my grin returning to my face as I teased, “It’s almost like you guys hired me for a reason,” I spoke, glancing to a still-stunned Ravi. “And now we can get started on everything else,” I started re-calculating in my head. Choreo, music video…

“And now,” N spoke up, “you get to take a break and promote with us,” he reminded me with a little grin of his own.

“Right,” I said with a little laugh, “I did promise that, didn’t I?”

“Enough about that stuff!” Ken spoke, interrupting us, “That song was so good!”

Hongbin looked at me carefully, “You looked so miserable and tired down there, but it was really worth it.”

“You really know what you’re doing,” Ravi spoke again, his face still blank.

I laughed again a little, “You know I was flattered, but now I’m getting a little worried you all have been doubting me this whole time.”

“No way!” Hyuk responded immediately, “You have to understand, Mira,” he looked so incredibly earnest as he crawled off the bed to sit next to me, “These are our voices we’re hearing like this.”

He had a point, so I nodded a little. “And this backing track,” Ken spoke up again, “it belongs in a Hollywood movie.”

“Totally different from other pop music,” Hongbin agreed.

As they continued to chatter, I tuned them out for a moment as I caught Leo’s eye. He had been sitting in the back, just as he had planned, letting his brothers do all the talking for him. But now, his eyes locked on mine, he gave me one of his large, toothy smiles that I saw so rarely, his eyes barely visible in his grin-occupied face. If I was honest, that smile was more approval than all the kind words anyone could throw my way. Not that the shower of compliments hurt, of course.

“Alright, alright!” N raised his voice to cut through the separate conversations that had broken out, “It’s almost four in the morning, and tomorrow is our last free day of rest before we start showing our lovely faces everywhere.”

Murmurs of agreement floated around the room as I stood, gathering my things carefully in my arms. “I’m glad you like it,” I said simply, smiling at them as I edged towards the door.

Hakyeon sighed dramatically, “Seriously?” he asked as he jumped off the bed, taking just a few steps before wrapping me in a surprisingly powerful hug, “The fact that you haven’t caught on by now is a little surprising.”

Soon enough, there was a knot of arms and bodies as each member joined in on the community hug. “Thank you Mira!” I heard Hyuk’s voice buried somewhere between Ken and Hongbin.

“Thank you guys,” I responded in kind before they let me go, “I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”