Chapter IV.

---

"...They like you better, unnie."

"What makes you think so?"

"They give you everything,"

"...But sometimes Krys, that doesn't mean they like me better."

---

Her breath was caught in . She couldn't move, couldn't hear anything except the sounds of rain pouring heavily over her head, the umbrella successfully shielding her from the incessant rainfall.

Tiffany.

The usual light tapping of plop, plop, plop was suddenly excruciatingly loud in her ears, the sound pounding harshly against her eardrums as she tried to think amidst the relentless beats.

Tiffany.

It was so deafening and Jessica feared that she wouldn't be able to hear anything else anymore. Despite how hard her mind tried to process that Krystal was gone – that her baby sister had ran away – all she could think of was how long it has been since she last felt like she belonged somewhere.

Tiffany.

How long has it been since she had last felt no chains binding her to obligations and responsibilities? Because all Jessica could think of at the moment was –

"...What are you doing out here, in the rain like this?"

–Was Tiffany.

Jessica could faintly hear Tiffany's muffled voice amidst the ringing sounds of rain slapping concrete floors. She couldn't move her limbs because nothing was functioning.

"Where's your jacket? And your shoes?" Jessica felt Tiffany murmur worriedly as the vibrations of the other girl's neck tickled her cheek lightly.

She couldn't find her voice.

"Why are you dressed like this? You're going to get sick," and she let Tiffany shift to hold her closer, lending Jessica her warmth from such proximity.

Jessica could only trail her eyes to follow Tiffany as the latter bent down to lift the freezing woman's right foot, watching Tiffany grimace at the sight of scrapes on red skin.

"...and why were you runnin–"

"–I missed you," Jessica had pulled the woman despite Tiffany still kneeling on the wet concrete floor.

She felt her stumble to remain balanced on one leg as Jessica tightened her arms around the other girl's shoulders. She faintly heard the thud of the woman's umbrella as rain fell onto her figure once more. She could feel Tiffany breathe against her collar bone, her thin dress a useless barrier against the warmth grazing her skin. It made her shiver more so than cold rain could.

The goosebumps only grew worse when she felt Tiffany's lips brush against her collar bone as she spoke.

"Jess..."

And Jessica couldn't differentiate the drops of rain on her face from the tears that inevitably spilled from her eyes.

That was all it took to make her break and fall.

She choked a sob when Tiffany's arms s hesitantly around her waist, as if unsure whether the other girl was allowed to be so close. Jessica held on tighter when Tiffany motioned to stand, paranoid and afraid that she would go.

Tiffany was back. She was back and Jessica wasn't going to be stupid enough to let her go again.

"I never meant it," she allowed the words to finally slip from her lips as they brushed against Tiffany's neck, "the words I said, I never meant them."

She felt Tiffany's throat tickle her cheek again as she spoke.

"I know,"

And Jessica hated how forgiving the other woman was.

"Why...?" Perhaps she was selfish, but Jessica didn't understand. Or maybe she really did because she knew Tiffany was just that nice, "Why can't you be like everyone else and show me how much I hurt you?" Or maybe she just refused to see it, "Why make me feel so frustrated and – and..."

"Make you feel like what?" Tiffany's quiet whisper made Jessica further crumble.

Her fingers shook as she held on, grip firm as she pressed her face further into the crook of Tiffany's neck. Her lips played gently against smooth skin as it motioned to form words; the mere touch making her chest burst into flames.

"...Like I don't deserve you,"

And Jessica didn't expect the truth from Tiffany to hurt as much as it did then, shakily holding onto the girl even tighter than she ever imagined she could.

"Because you don't," Tiffany whispered silently. Despite that, Jessica only felt Tiffany's grip on her waist draw her closer. "but that doesn't mean I still–"

"–Why...?" She croaked, a choked sob escaping her lips.

Jessica didn't have to hear the rest of her words to know what she was going to say.

...Why do you still love me?

Jessica thought Tiffany was crazy, then.

Who in their right mind would still want someone who they knew didn't deserve a single thing from them? She could only clench her fists against Tiffany's shoulders, her fingers curling beneath the drenched material of the other woman's jacket. Jessica breathed in through gritted teeth, the guilt and regret overwhelming her.

Why me? Why not someone better? Why not someone who actually deserves you...?

Because they both knew she didn't.

Tiffany released a gentle chuckle, as if the question itself was absurd as she tightened her hold around her waist. "It's because—"

And Jessica never got to hear what she had to say when she was pulled roughly out of Tiffany's grip.

She released a gasp when she staggered back from such momentum as large, thick hands grasped her forearms and moved her away from Tiffany. The distance between them was now large as she looked up to see her father's back in front of her, successfully shielding and keeping her from getting any closer to Tiffany.

Jessica held onto her father's back in stunned silence, the wet material slippery beneath her fingers as her mind began to process what had just happened. She could see Tiffany's pink umbrella a little further away on the cement floor, vulnerable under the pouring rain as Jessica tried to peer over her father's large stature.

She couldn't see Tiffany.

"D—Dad...?" She meekly called out, pulling on her father's jacket as she teetered to take a glimpse of the other girl. But her father's arms were held out, firmly keeping her still and motionless behind him.

"Thanks for finding her," his voice came out gruff, low, and stern as he his heel to get a hold of Jessica's wrist, "but it's best that we take our leave."

It didn't take much effort for her father to pull her away as she struggled to get out of his grip. Jessica paused momentarily and she watched her father turn, his expression firm as she breathed, the rain managing to cool off her face.

"Dad," but her father merely turned back around and ushered her towards his car parked nearby. Jessica looked over her shoulder in haste, fear evident in her eyes as she watched Tiffany kneel down to pick up her fallen umbrella.

"T—Tiffany!" She was honestly surprised her father didn't reprimand her at that moment as she held onto the car door, unwilling to get in as she kept her eyes focused on the crouched figure.

Jessica desperately needed Tiffany's dark eyes to meet hers as the latter stood and placed her umbrella over her head. When Tiffany finally met her gaze, Jessica watched her lips curve into a crooked smile.

Tiffany understood her situation, but Jessica didn't want her to.

Not anymore.

And Jessica couldn't tear her gaze to look anywhere else as she watched Tiffany turn and walk away, lifting her phone to her ear as her umbrella shielded her fading figure.

---

Krystal hadn't realized where she was until she stopped to breathe. Her hand gripped some steel pole as she crouched for oxygen. She finally realized exactly where she was when she looked up to see an image of a bus on the sign pasted above.

She remained still as she gasped in air to her lungs, finding it difficult to stand as her eyes wandered to look for a place to sit. She motioned towards the little cubicle to avoid any more rain as she slumped ungracefully against the steel-cold seat. Krystal clutched her chest, the water fluxing through her fingers from the wet material as her lungs burned and screamed for oxygen.

Her breaths continued to come out shallow, her vision already blurred as she struggled to focus on breathing.

Breathe in, breathe out.

Krystal never noticed her other hand was already grasping onto her phone until she pulled it out of her pocket, staring hard at the screen to see she had already dialed someone. Her vision was too hazy to really read who it was.

Slightly curious, and just extremely tired, Krystal held the phone to her ear, resting her head back against the glass wall. She vaguely wondered who her mind had unconsciously looked for.

"Hello?"

And Krystal should have known.

Tiffany,

"If you need anything, or just want to have someone to talk to, I'm willing to listen." Krystal remembered Tiffany tell her the day before as she punched in her phone number.

A smile had unconsciously formed at the sound of her voice as Krystal pressed her phone a little closer to her ear. She wanted to hear every syllable clearly, because she didn't want to miss a single thing.

She breathed in, still short of breath as she thought of words to say.

Tiffany has been her source of comfort lately.

Getting straight to the point was all that mattered to her now as she mustered up strength to just stay awake. Krystal felt her hold on her phone begin to loosen, her fingers slowly uncurling as she breathed in.

"T—Tiff...?" Krystal spoke out with a rasp despite swallowing in hopes of moistening her dry throat, "...Would you look for me if I needed you?"

Krystal heard Tiffany take a sharp intake of breath, as if her voice had stirred something inside her. Her mind filtered it out when Tiffany replied with assuring confidence.

"Why wouldn't I?"

And Krystal wryly smiled to herself.

...Because my parents wouldn't, was what Krystal wanted to say, but was too sore and she was just too tired.

Her eyes were beginning to droop.

"...Then look for me,"

And Krystal finally allowed her eyes to close, her phone slipping from her tired fingers.

Because I need you,

---

The car ride back home was silent and it was nerve-wrecking to Jessica. She pursed her lips and would turn her gaze away whenever she caught her father staring at her from the rear-view mirror. She was too accustomed to fiddle with her hands tucked together on her lap as the silence continued to loom over them in the air.

She was angry and frustrated, and Jessica couldn't bear to think any longer knowing why.

Her gaze snapped quickly to meet her father's cold counterpart as he spoke firmly.

"You were careless," Jessica merely kept mum as she rested her sight out the window, ignoring her father's heavy scrutiny. "people were watching. I wouldn't be surprised if several photos were already taken," he stated sternly.

Jessica bit her lip to keep from saying anything as she watched buildings scroll by.

"Your shoes are missing, your clothes are drenched," he listed on, as if she should be concerned. "you're a mess, and you didn't bother hiding that."

"Of course not," she replied curtly, her gaze flickering back to meet her father's. "not when I was looking for Krystal."

His disbelieving scoff made her brow twitch in irritation.

"That wasn't what it looked like to me, Sooyeon." And Jessica merely kept mum, "Who was she?" —Who is she to you? Why was she holding you? Why was she so close to you? Jessica heard the several implications from his tone but she refused to answer any longer, turning away and somehow her father seemed content with her decision. "Soojung can take care of herself, and evidently," she met his gaze again when his voice became sharp, "you can't."

"So you're just going to leave Krystal out on her own?" Jessica struggled to keep her voice from rising any higher.

He merely grunted, spinning the wheel to enter their garage. It wasn't until they paused and he turned the engine off that he replied, even bothering to turn around to face her in his seat.

"You are weak, timid, vulnerable, naive, and pathetic." Each word that spilled from his gritted teeth pierced through her chest as he spoke with non-chalance, "Soojung isn't."

And Jessica couldn't believe that she had lead herself to think that he cared.

---

"Wh—Where...?"

Krystal rubbed her eyes, groaning as she lifted her head. She blinked, stared, blinked, and narrowed her eyes when she realized that she was still in the cubicle, the rain refusing to go away. Her vision wasn't as distorted anymore and her head didn't pound as much as before. Her chest still felt heavy, but her breathing wasn't too shallow to worry about.

"...Tiff?" She croaked, looking up to meet dark eyes and she flushed under the pair of crescents.

She found her.

"How did you manage to...?" —Find me? Krystal couldn't bring herself to finish though, already embarrassed at thinking back and she lowered her head when Tiffany chuckled lightly.

She watched the woman comb her fingers through her black hair, her lips motioning to speak. "We only ever met up at the bus stop,"

Krystal couldn't believe she could get any redder than she already was. Her shoulders inched closer to her torso in embarrassment, head hung low so that her dark hair would cover her face from Tiffany's steady gaze as she pressed her hands together on her lap.

"Oh..."

And she scolded herself inwardly for sounding as lame as she did then. But Tiffany's amused laughter made her lift her head to stare in wonder as the woman smiled, her dark eyes remaining curved.

"I can take you home,"

Krystal felt herself flinch at the mention of 'home' and shook her head in protest. She leaned her head back to feel the cold glass seep through her scalp as she looked up to watch the rain fall above her.

"I don't..." ...I don't want to go home, she thought to herself, but Tiffany seemed to understand what was missing and kept mum.

When silence enveloped them, Krystal began to eye the other woman as discreetly as she could. Her pink umbrella that she held in her hands was heavily drenched, and so were her clothes.

It didn't make sense if she had her umbrella, so why was she soaked?

Krystal cleared , wanting to avoid any more stuttering as she asked quietly, "Did something happen?"

Tiffany's chuckle caressed her ear drums and Krystal craned her neck to look at her, the woman's expression seemingly distant.

"Shouldn't I be asking you that?"

"I asked first,"

And Krystal refrained from giggling along as Tiffany laughed gently, allowing only a smile to grace her lips as the other woman tilted her head to face her. Krystal fought the heat that began to rise to her cheeks as Tiffany blatantly stared. She wasn't used to such close attention.

"Are you willing to stay soaked and cold in a cubicle for the rest of the evening?"

Krystal struggled to decipher the look of longing in Tiffany's dark eyes, as if her mind was someplace else, but feigned ignorance as she tilted her chin down to stare at her drenched dress-pants that clung to her thighs.

"Why are you asking?" Krystal crinkled her nose when Tiffany gave her a lop-sided smile.

"Because I'm freezing and I want to go home," and Krystal returned her gaze to meet Tiffany's, "and the thought of leaving you here isn't sitting well with me." Krystal's eyes instinctively widened then as Tiffany grinned behind words, "So, would you like to come along?"

And Krystal allowed Tiffany to take her hand and help her up as she shielded themselves with her umbrella from the pouring rain.

It didn't escape Krystal's eyes when her phone vibrated and she looked to see who the caller was.

'From: Jessica-unnie'

"Too tired to answer that?" Krystal instinctively shoved her phone back into her pocket and looked up to see questioning pairs of dark eyes, "Is it your unnie? I could tell her that you're with me if you can't, since she must be worried."

Krystal didn't understand why she suddenly felt defensive and insecure, as if her sister had the power to change things, but merely shook her head to dismiss Tiffany's curious gaze with a reassuring smile.

"It's fine, don't worry about it." When Tiffany remained unsure, Krystal grasped the woman's elbow in an attempt to relinquish any doubt left. "I'll tell her,"

She pulled out her phone again when Tiffany merely shrugged.

---

( Where are you? Are you okay? Please be safe, unnie is waiting for you Krys. )
Sender: Jessica-unnie.
Received: 11:35:16 pm
Received: 03/15/12

( Krys, where are you? Why aren't you answering your phone? Call me, please. )
Sender: Jessica-unnie.
Received: 11:39:20 pm
Received: 03/15/12

( I'm sorry, for everything. But please, just come home. I promise I'll be a better unnie, just promise me you'll come back. )
Sender: Jessica-unnie.
Received: 11:41:10 pm
Received: 03/15/12

( Krystal...? )
Sender: Jessica-unnie.
Received: 11:45:12 pm
Received: 03/15/12