Before Hyunjung became friends with Jungkook, Taehyung, Jimin, Shinae and the other boys, she remembered her lunchtimes were very lonely – of course she didn’t exactly realize that at the time. She began recognizing it once she began paying more attention to the people who did have friends they could be with, and how happy they were when they were around them. To be alone and to be lonely were different. Hyunjung didn’t want to be either. It’s good to have people around you. But then again, that want can be risky; depending on other people, what would happen if one day they weren’t there? What would happen? Who would you depend your happiness onto then? Those are things you need to consider even if they don’t seem important at the time. But Hyunjung didn’t want to worry. So she tried her best not to let those thoughts get to her. Her happiness was still reaching its peak, so there was no way she wanted it to get down. Whenever she was on her own, she always compared what her school life was like before making friends to now. And she could definitely conclude that those days were very lonely.  

It seemed like everyone was busy that lunchtime; Shinae was with Jihyun to finish an assignment, Jin, Yoongi and Namjoon were studying for an upcoming test and Jungkook, Hoseok and Jimin volunteered to go help train the first years who played badminton and had a tournament coming up. The only person whose whereabouts she didn’t know was Taehyung’s, but he could be anywhere. Hyunjung could have studied, but what for? She didn’t have any upcoming tests, she finished those already, and she had finished all her homework. So she was left to wander at her own free will.

She couldn’t help but keep thinking whether or not any of this was real; her friends and their companionship, her relationship with Jungkook. For a while now, she realized just how involved Jungkook was in her life, everything seemed to remind her of him. Even the metal stairs she was climbing up to get to the library; she had just gone past the spot where she had accidentally tripped him up last year. The thought of it made her want to slap herself at how ridiculous she was being, and how often she was thinking about him. She let out a defeated sigh, sliding her hand along the top of the railing as she continued to sluggishly drag her feet at each step. She was so bored. There wasn’t even anyone she could complain about her boredom to.

Hyunjung cursed the school for having so many damn stairs. Each footfall made a clank against the metal treads and she couldn’t have thought of a lonelier sound. But the approaching noise of another pair of feet coming from above was enough to lift her spirits, even if there was a great chance it was someone she barely knew. But once she saw the straight mouth, the chemistry textbooks and the concentrated gaze, she felt an unexpected feeling of happiness and relief course through her.

“Taehyung!”

The startled boy hadn’t seen her until she had called out his name. He blinked, and the realization hit him. “Hey! Slow down or else you’ll tri –”

His warning came too late.

The next thing Hyunjung knew she was at the landing but her foot had caught onto the last step and she put her hands in front of her, but her fall was ungraceful and heavy.  “Ouch” seemed to be the only thing she could say at that moment, and Taehyung had already hurried over next to her.

“This is what happens when you don’t watch where you’re going,” he said, reaching a hand out to help her up.

“I know, I know.” She dusted her skirt and wringed her wrists a few times. Taehyung’s eyes went to her wrists, as if checking to see if it was beginning to swell, or for any sign that she had sprained it.

“Did you hurt yourself?”

“I don’t think so,” she replied.

“Idiot.”

She grinned sheepishly. “I know.”

“You sure you don’t want to go to the nurse and check that?” he asked, still looking at her hand.

She waved him off. “Nope, I’m sure I’m fine.”

“Okay then.”

Hyunjung shot him another grin. “I was just going to the library. What about you?”

“I was going to go see my physics teacher about some classwork I missed.”

“Oh.”

They stood there for a good couple of seconds before they realized that they had absolutely nothing to say, and went on their way. Hyunjung was beginning to question why she hurried in the first place. She kept on climbing the stairs until she reached the top landing and continued to walk past the other classrooms as she made her way towards the direction of the library. She was about to turn a corner when she finally realized someone was behind her. She turned to see who it was. A wide bunny-smile was the first thing her attention was drawn to.

“Jungkook? I thought you were doing training with the first years?” she said, seeing that he was already changed from his sportswear to his uniform. He wasn’t wearing his blazer as usual, and his sleeves were rolled loosely up to his forearms, as usual. She wondered how he managed to get away with that considering the teachers were quite tight on uniform, especially at this time of the year, but she let the thought slide.

“Hoseok and Jimin said they got it covered,” he replied and crept his hands into his pockets as he looked down to the floor. “I just wanted to spend some time with you.”

She wasn’t expecting that. She also didn’t know where to look and resorted to staring at her hands, but shortly after, Jungkook joined his hands with hers and interlaced their fingers together. It didn’t help with the light pink that was starting to show on Hyunjung’s cheeks. She definitely still wasn’t used to this, Jungkook succeeded to surprise her in more ways than one. He led her down along the classrooms, Hyunjung’s trip to the library now well out of her mind. They walked like that together with their hands still joined until Jungkook halted and opened the door to a classroom.

“No one’s using this room today,” he said and led her in. It was one of the bigger classrooms, and though the crème walls were bare the windows were large; they overlooked the field and you were even able to see the first years doing soccer practice. Jungkook and Hyunjung took their place and sat on the floor just below one of the windows, leaning their backs against the wall. Jungkook had placed their hands between them, but still kept them interlinked. The color on Hyunjung’s cheeks were, to her dismay, starting to show again. His head rested against the wall and he was looking ahead of him, but his hand still tightly held hers. “It’s Jimin’s birthday this weekend.”

Her embarrassment went as quickly as she brought her other hand to her gobsmacked mouth. “I haven’t even bought him a present.” Although she wasn’t as close to Jimin as he was to Jungkook, the other boys or even Shinae, she still considered him as a friend and felt bad for not even asking when his birthday was. Jungkook looked at her from the side and chuckled when he saw the evident sulk on her face.

“Hey, it’s fine. He stated already he didn’t want any friends to get him anything,” he reassured.

Her brows furrowed. “Wait, why didn’t you get him a present?” You’re his best friend.

He almost burst out in laughter at her melancholy reaction. “Of course I do! I’m not that terrible of a best friend. He told me not to get him a gift, but I already got one for him five months early.”

She contemplated him thoughtfully. “You really do care for him, don’t you?” It was difficult to tell just how much by all the teasing Jungkook does to him. She didn’t notice she was subconsciously gripping tighter onto his hand, which caused Jungkook to smile in affection and fit her hand even more in his.

“Of course. Yes, we purposely get on his nerves, but I wouldn’t be anywhere without Jimin. But he’ll be going back to Busan to visit his family in the weekend so we won’t be able to prank him and pull off a surprise party like we usually do. Every year he falls for it.” He laughed again at his last statement.

They had only been sat like that for ten minutes, they knew because the clock was hung on the opposite wall where they could see, but it felt longer, and during that time the space between them when they first sat down had minimized so much until their shoulders were touching. They were both so still, and Hyunjung could barely feel Jungkook’s hand with hers, well they were still interlinked, but it just felt natural, and comfortable, as if it wasn’t just another person next to her.

She finally spoke up, “Jungkook?”

“Hm?” He turned his head a little to the side, being careful so that he didn’t knock her head with his.

“I’m sorry, but I honestly feel like none of this is happening.”

“What do you mean?”

She exhaled heavily and Jungkook watched her. “If I was my past self and could foresee into the future, I would think this was some kind of prank. When I woke up this morning I thought that everything that happened didn’t happen. I know it sounds weird, but that was how I felt. That day when you sat with me briefly at lunch, even then I didn’t think it could be real. I always wanted proper friends, which I got, but after that I got even more than I could ask for.”

Jungkook kept quiet, and she waited for him to say something, anything. But he used his other hand to reach into one of his pockets and got out a black pen. It had no lid, so he loosened his grip on her hand but then took it back in his again, though this time he didn’t interlace their fingers. Instead he turned her hand over so her palm was facing up and placed the end of the pen onto the skin between her forefinger and thumb. Hyunjung watched him in confusion, wondering what he was even doing.

“What is this?” She laughed under her breath when she saw that he was drawing on her hand. What it was? She could barely tell. It was a small doodle of a circle, but then eyes, bunny ears and buck teeth were added along with it.  A small heart was drawn next to it, and she was all the more puzzled as to why he was doing this.

Jungkook moved so he could see her face better, and was amused at the confusion in her expression when she looked at the doodle on her hand. He pointed to it. “That’s me. Amazing self-portrait, don’t you think?”

“Uh…”

He weaved their fingers together again. “When I’m not with you for the rest of the day, and you still can’t believe any of this, just look down at that hand to remind yourself, that this – all of this, is real.”

Her words were lodged in and the confidence she had built up to say what she wanted to say had gone, just like that. And the reason behind it was the very person beside her. She sighed and straightened so her back was now against the wall again. She knew Jungkook was right next to her, but when she turned her head she realized just how close they actually were. Jungkook shifted his body sideways and she glanced away out of shyness. His free hand reached under her hair below her ear and he touched her cheek as he stared at her. Hyunjung could feel her heart beating so rapidly that she could feel it pulsing through her ears, she wanted to look away to compose herself but Jungkook’s gaze had succeeded in holding hers.

Her lips parted a little so she could take in more air to breathe, in a hope that it would slow her heart’s erratic beating, but it was useless because their breaths only intermingled. She remained still as he drew his lips to hers. He held it there for a few seconds before he began to move his lips gently, slowly, cautiously; he just didn’t want her to feel afraid and pull away from him. Jungkook’s hands went to the back of her head so that they could be closer, and Hyunjung felt like she was in bliss. He briefly pulled away and leaned his forehead on hers, and whispered, “It’s all real.”

He slowly leaned in again, his kiss once again surprising Hyunjung. She was beginning to get conscious of where to place her hands, and Jungkook noticed this and guided them so they were on his shoulders. Jungkook drew her closer to his chest and she could feel his heart beating, she was surprised that it was beating just as rapidly as hers. Their lips weren’t in sync, which slipped in a few giggles from both of them. It was clear that her experience barely matched with Jungkook’s, but he didn’t care. The pace of their kiss got a little faster and Hyunjung swore her heart could explode at any time. Her hands had gone to fiddle with the hair just above his nape while his was still on her cheek, the other on her waist. They pulled away from time to time to catch their breaths, but soon again Jungkook would press his lips onto hers, kissing her again and again to drive into her doubtful mind that all of this was real.

It was all real.