10. UNSPOKEN

Trigger warning (sort of?)

Kyungsoo doesn't push it. He doesn't ask Jongin for answers like he really wants to do. He doesn't sit down and start trying to figure the elder boy out.

He lets it go, hoping that there will be a day where Jongin will tell the truth by himself, without coaxing or prodding on Kyungsoo's part.

He can't stop himself, however, from scolding Jongin a bit for not showing up at the support group sessions.

"Sehun has been giving me evils for the last week now," Kyungsoo complains, grimacing at Jongin as they walk through the dance studio building. "He used to be scared of me. Now he's just angry because I'm keeping him away from his obsession." He says, the last part coming out sullen.

Jongin just laughs aloud - an unrestrained, genuine, carrying laugh -, eyes crinkling into crescents and twinkling in an infectious amusement. 

"Sehun isn't obsessed with me," he denies, chuckling at the thought, "he just looks up to me. I'm like his older brother."

Kyungsoo raises a teasingly disbelieving brow, staring up at Jongin through his lashes.

"Really," Jongin goes on, smiling wide at Kyungsoo’s animated expression. "Sehun doesn't like me the way that you think he does. And I'll come today - if that makes any difference."

And it does.

If Kyungsoo thought Jongin's welcome before was a show of how long he has been there, his welcome back now is even more than that. Because when Minseok slaps Jongin around the head for disappearing on them, and Jongdae punches him in the arm, everyone else granting similar words or wide smiles, Sehun clinging to Jongin like he doesn't want to ever let go, Kyungsoo can see how much everyone has missed him. 

"You brought him back," Tao states, standing aside with Kyungsoo to watch the greetings.

They haven't really talked about it; how Jongin and Kyungsoo know each other. They never really mentioned it, but Tao accepted it without explanation.

"He doesn't come to every session," Kyungsoo points out in response, suddenly feeling like he has to justify himself. 

"He hasn't missed three week's worth before," Tao says. "He's always come at least once every week, without fail, since his very first session. He's always made the time for it, somehow."

Kyungsoo stutters silently around a response, lips opening and closing multiple times, but his mouth inevitably falls shut. He looks Tao's way and the younger boy turns to meet his gaze, a peculiar expression on his face that makes Kyungsoo squirm. 

"Y-You were here before Jongin?" Kyungsoo asks, changing the subject and breaking the contact. 

He doesn't expect Tao's eyes to darken the smallest amount, his jaw setting when he turns his head away again, the air suddenly tense.

"I was here before everyone," he says. "And you know that isn't the question you should be asking."

Kyungsoo, intrigued by the boy's strange change of temperament, finds himself answering before he even gets a chance to think his words over.

"What should I be asking?" He feeds, watching the other's expression carefully - how it softens slightly, loses its sullenness; gains a bit of solemn mischief. 

Tao edges closer, tilting his head so that the next words he whispers will be heard only by him.

"Why you?"

The session that starts today is a lot lighter than it usually is - Jongin's presence, his there-ness, taking small weights off everyone's chest.

It doesn't make Kyungsoo feel uncomfortable like it had done in that first session; he doesn't feel inclined to stay quiet, or to edge away from the attention like he had tried so hard to do beforehand, when a group of strangers suddenly became a group of strangers plus one - a Kim Jongin; an unknowable; a daunting.

It might be because he's used to how they go now - the sessions -, how everything goes now, even if there are times where he is reluctant to speak still, and sessions where he stays quiet through it all - preferring not to contribute. But it also might be because something has changed between him and Jongin - a tip off the scale of beginnings. It's not awkward between them now; it doesn't feel like a start like it had done - scattered and unsure - and it doesn't feel like they've only known each other a few weeks. 

It feels like whatever had passed between them, whatever that short confrontation had left, had forced them closer in the aftermath.

The same goes for everyone else in the group who he's spent time with in these last few weeks of sessions. He's learnt a lot - about everyone around him, and hints of their individual stories; why they're here (apart from the obvious) and what they're trying to make better, that being gay has made hard. 

It is never clean cut and simple - there's always a something, an event, a happening, which provokes it all; the need for support, the need for sanctuary, the need for someone to listen.

For Kyungsoo it was Eun-Seo - not the leader, not the beating, no, he's not allowed to affect Kyungsoo's decisions. It was Eun-seo's worry lines, her sleepless nights, her deaf pleas when she thought he couldn't hear. It was her muted and quiet suffering, for his loud and languid years of it. 

This last week, those words have lingered on the brink of his tongue - that clarification that can help people understand him in that way that's so fundamental for this group. He's always so close to saying it, but the moment never comes, and he wanders, sometimes, if it ever will. His relationship with these people strengthens for each load he lets off his chest, but there's only so much Kyungsoo feels okay about giving away.

He's always been a silent worrier, not wanting to share his burdens, and he doesn't see that changing anytime soon.

For everyone else though, he has gathered up their stories, like a scuba diver unearthing hidden treasures.

They're reasons for being here: he has collected the complete set - each explanation as torturously painful as the other. 

For a past member, as Kyungsoo learns at his seventh session - when the story is mentioned in passing and he is the only one unknowing -, it was from a friend, a slip up in words, an implication, a 'they're not normal' before they knew that a they was in their presence, an insult hovering on a tongue which was supposed to be trustworthy.

It could be that small, that simple - one word, one waver, one shed tear; something like that, sticking to someone's mind so that they can't forget it; trifling enough but strong enough for people to think, 'oh, okay, now I need to get help'. 

It always leaves punctures: these words, these actions, and these moments. For everyone in the group, they are searching for the words which will mend the bad ones, the actions which will undo the harsh ones, and the moments which will overcome the terrible ones. There is nothing fixed about this - there won't just suddenly be a session where someone phrases their words in exactly the right way, or a person realises how they can deal with everything on their own. It's so indefinite, so unspecified. Kyungsoo has wondered, more than once, how people can tell when the ‘fixing’ finally ends. He knows members have left the group - come and gone, moved on, started broken but left fixed - but he can't see that, can't see himself ever being able to leave this place, ever being okay enough to go. He can't see an end goal when he goes to these sessions - he can't pinpoint what he wants to change other than to stop being afraid. He might be ready to leave from here sometime, someday - step out of this newly-formed routine of sorts, tread forward on his own two feet - but he might never realise when that time comes. 

Yixing tells him that he'll know - that everyone knows when they're okay enough again. He also says that Kyungsoo needs to stop skipping steps and jumping to an end goal; progress like this takes long.

For now though, Kyungsoo is drifting along with this group, and is only just starting to get to know each person involved.

And today, Jongin can be added to that list of people. 

Apart from the one three weeks ago, the one where everything shattered without Kyungsoo even really realising it, Kyungsoo hasn't been in a session with Jongin.

He's curious - he can't not be. He wonders what the boy is like, wonders what his story is, wonders about the mystery that is Kim Jongin just like he has been for weeks now.

It's almost natural how they seat themselves next to each other, like Jongin has always been there by his side. 

"Okay," Yixing says, the chatter in the hall ebbing into silence. "Teacher-swap day."

Kyungsoo blinks, but the group around him immediately switch their gazes to Junmyeon, something new in their expressions when the elder straightens up, turning Yixing's way with startled eyes.

"Teacher swap..?" Kyungsoo mutters, and he almost flinches back when Jongin's jaw suddenly cuts into his vision, words whispering into his ear.

"Sometimes Junmyeon leads the sessions," Jongin explains, not noticing the way Kyungsoo's eyes have widened just slightly at the sudden proximity. "He just does this one thing, and it isn't really a common occurrence, for reasons you're about to see."

Kyungsoo finds it in himself to nod, still sort of frazzled, but Jongin doesn't seem to notice (though when he looks Tao's way, Tao smirks and he definitely ing noticed.). He's not quite used to Jongin yet, and the barriers that he toes the line on. Jongin is a touchy sort of person, and Kyungsoo's never had someone like that before. 

Yixing and Junmyeon are quietly bickering to each other, and he hears snippets that may or may not threaten week-long abstinence from (where Yixing's eyes twinkle, Junmyeon blanches, and Kyungsoo reddens so much it should probably hurt), but eventually Junmyeon lets out a short groan and then stands right up, a mutely smug Yixing smiling wide in the background.

"Okay. Get up." Junmyeon instructs, casting a look around the group before turning back to walk towards a door at the back of the hall.

Kyungsoo startles as everyone around him, like a spell has been cast, stands all at once, and it takes him a stilted moment to reach down and grab his crutches - only, before he can even rise, Junmyeon is back, a pink ball in his hands, and he chides a quick, "not you. Do you want him to be even more evil to me?", gesturing back towards Yixing who only beams back widely, dimple glaring bright.

"I-I'd rather stand," Kyungsoo says, shifting uncomfortably when he sees how everyone suddenly looms over him. And when Junmyeon looks at him warily, he repeats it, an "I can stand, really."

He still squints, unsure, but Tao and Jongin, at the same time, chime in with a, "I'll support him," both glancing quickly at each other over Kyungsoo's head - Tao with a small smile, Jongin with a bemused, raised brow - at the simultaneous suggestion.

"Whatever," Junmyeon agrees, "you heard that Xing. They've taken responsibility. Now let's get started, I guess."

Kyungsoo rises, and he looks instantly to Tao for help, but the younger boy only smiles evilly, not making a move, and Kyungsoo only realises what he's doing when he feels Jongin's arm hook around his back.

He sends Tao a glare, but the boy only chuckles all heartily.

"Right," Junmyeon says, an unnervingly sweet smile on his face. Kyungsoo looks around at the group around him, and he notices instantly how everyone has tensed, hands by their sides, twitching as if to-

Junmyeon throws the ball so suddenly that Kyungsoo almost startles back, gaping at Kris who catches it without so much as a flinch on his face, a falter in his unbothered expression.

"This," Junmyeon says, directing his gaze to Kyungsoo, "is called 'Anyone's Game'. When you get the ball, you're in charge. No speaking without the ball. No not speaking with the ball. You can say anything you want, and you can't bring up anything else anyone else has said. Get it all off your chest; the truths you couldn't speak when it really mattered. This is a no response game. You say anything, and we'll never bring it up again - got it?"

Kris throws the ball back here, and Junmyeon catches it easily, waiting until Kyungsoo gives a small, slightly stilted nod of his head. Yixing, behind the other, smiles wide at the back of his head, not speaking any words, and Kyungsoo wanders, suddenly, why everyone looks so curiously still. 

As per ordinary, it doesn't take long to figure out.

Junmyeon does it abruptly - throws the ball over to Minseok, who catches it square over his chest, his signature gummy smile faltering just the slightest - and everything begins all at once, like a crash collision of cars on a motorway. 

"When I was younger," Minseok announces the words, eyes fixed to an imaginary presence standing before him. "you used to tell me that we could tell each other anything, and that, when there was nothing left to say, we could listen to the silence together,” he finishes, and then his expression transforms, in this beautifully paining way that Kyungsoo has never seen anyone in the group show before, and it strikes Kyungsoo what this game is going to do to him.

"I want to listen to the silence together," Minseok goes on, and his shoulders sag in a sigh. "Is that so much to ask?"

He throws the ball across to Baekhyun then, the action so abrupt that Kyungsoo can barely take in the words when-

"I wish you'd just tell me," Baekhyun speaks softly, fragile but warm. "I'd rather you would tell me, then suffer in pain."

A blink, a thump, a smooth, reflexive catch and then Jongdae has the ball, his usually wide smile flattening into something more serious.

"I want to show you the seconds," is all he says, and, without further expansion, the ball gets back to Minseok, who smiles a private smile like he's heard something special in those words. 

"You make everything easy," he says this time, lighter than his first turn, and then the ball is thrown towards Chanyeol, whose hands fumble with it for a few seconds before holding it steady. 

"I want you to smile more," he says, and it should be anonymous, but the boy's eyes aren't discreet when they dart Baekhyun's way, a few spaces to his right. "If you're happy, so will I be."

The ball comes flying again, softer this time, and it perches easily in Jongin's single outstretched palm, his hold on Kyungsoo not even faltering for a moment.

With Jongin in possession of it now, Kyungsoo baits his breath, waits apprehensively for the boy to speak, but-

"I wish it was me," is all he offers, sounding somehow distant. "I want it to be me."

And instead of throwing it across to someone like Kyungsoo is expecting, Jongin perches the ball into Kyungsoo's empty hand, granting him possession, and his mind goes blank.

"Um," he says, shrinking under the attention, but Jongin, his hand behind him, rubs a smooth soothing circle into his skin, and he takes a deep breath, and it's suddenly so simple because-

"Why do you do it?" Kyungsoo asks, imagining the leader standing before him, and he's suddenly breathless because oh he hadn't expected it to feel so good, saying something that he's wanted to say for so long, pretending it's off his chest for a short, self-indulgent moment. He swipes his tongue over his parched lips, gulping around the lump in his throat, and his stomach uncoils just slightly when he goes on. "I get scared a lot. I wonder if you'll ever stop-" and he's not being discreet, so it shouldn't make him pause when Jongin's hand soothingly across his back, even as he tenses by Kyungsoo's side. "-and I wonder if you'll ever change."

And when the words die out, and the ball starts to scald against his palms, he throws it fast towards Yixing, heart unfurling at how wondrously nice that was, but he has no time to dwell on the feeling when the elder starts to speak. 

"I like that you're so protective," Yixing smiles, and everyone around switches their gaze to Junmyeon, watching how his expression turns intent and his ears perk like he's listening. "Even if I might tease, or faux-complain in public, don't ever let go of my hand."

Yixing passes the ball, as calm and collected and abundantly controlled as ever, and Junmyeon's eyes fill with a warmth that everyone sees when the other suddenly reaches out and wraps their hands together in an indiscreet embrace.

Everyone pauses to smile, Jongdae and Luhan cooing out soft ‘awhs’ by Junmyeon's side that has the elder boy glaring playfully in their direction, and the momentary lift in the mood rejuvenates.

The game continues with Tao in control, and all he says is, "understand me," before the ball comes flying into Kris' hands, his eyes bashful from across the circle.

"I wish it was easier for you," Kris says, his words verging on a riposte when his jaw tilts Tao's way. "I wish I could make things easier for you."

And it goes on like that, over and over: a wondrously endless cycle of beautiful, broken people, spilling words they have always been too afraid to say aloud, to the nameless few who might never get the chance to hear it. Like sinking into pure springs of water, each word has each person wallowing in a self-indulgent and refreshingly momentary Neverland; crossing the boundaries they've never thought to cross, saying the truths they've never believed could be said.

In a world filled with unspoken promises, everyone, in these moments, is making their voice heard.

It's so breathtaking, Kyungsoo thinks, some of the things people are capable of saying when they see no repercussions. Even without context, when Luhan wishes for a nameless person's endless happiness, when Minseok asks that his anonymous someone could rest for a change - their eyes too worryingly tired -, when word after unwavering word, spills from the bottom of kind hearts until the whole room is worn thin and they've been at it for the whole session, Kyungsoo thinks that he has never felt more glad that he chose to come here, all those weeks back, and could meet all these people.

"Cleansed?" Junmyeon asks, almost teasing, the ball resting between his fingers in a loose grip. He didn't contribute, Kyungsoo realises now, belatedly, when they are all sat down again, the last tendrils of warmth from Jongin's arm hovering like a scorch across his back. The game had been too consuming for him to realise before then, but he wanders now, suddenly, why the man didn't do so, and why no one expected it of him.

He's never really given himself a moment's thought to stop and try to gage the workings of the cassowary's mind. With Yixing by his side, mysterious but enticingly eccentric, Kyungsoo has never once considered why Junmyeon might be here, helping with this group - it having never struck him that that is his duty until today.

Jongin was right, he realises, staring at the elder man carefully. It makes sense why Junmyeon doesn't lead most of the sessions. His approach, though okay for these last two hours, would be far too much to handle on a daily basis. Yixing is gentler, careful with his words and how he phrases them. Junmyeon is... Well, Junmyeon is extravagant, like the cassowary he has been jokingly labelled as since Kyungsoo's first session. He doesn't hold himself back. He doesn't bite his tongue when he wants to say something. He is, in every single way, blunt and strong-willed.

Kyungsoo realises now why the game is something attached to the man per-automatic. He is, of everyone here, the only person who does not need it.

"It feels good, doesn't it?" Junmyeon goes on, but it's directed to Kyungsoo mainly, as the only member who hasn't played it before. Kyungsoo smiles softly in response, a rush in his chest that has him breathing more freely than he has breathed in years, and Junmyeon understands.

The game is long-finished before Kyungsoo can no longer suppress his curiosities, and he allows himself time to wrap his head around all that had been said when he's back home, coddled at his desk. There are a few things still tugging incessantly at the back of his minds - things that can't be forgotten, that don't quite sit right when he lets himself mull them over.

Jongin, something he had said (and who else could it possibly be?), has left a crisp layer in Kyungsoo's mind.

"If you knew", he had said, "all that I have done, and all that I will undoubtedly do, would you still smile at me like you could never see me do wrong?"

Kyungsoo doesn't know why the words have stuck to him, like popcorn kernels sticking to the back of your throat. He doesn't know why he had turned edgy at the recital, or why Jongin had gripped him just the slightest bit tighter at his movements. In his gut though, like the sure churn that arises when something happens to make you sick, Kyungsoo feels like the words are meant for him.

It makes no sense. They've barely known each other, and even then they barely do. Jongin is still a stranger, still a mystery for him to solve, but it feels like there's so much happening between them now, so much unspoken that couldn't even be said today, that Kyungsoo doesn't know where they stand. How can something be so complex when it is still so fresh? How can someone spark such intense thoughts after a measly month's-worth of stilted conversation? 

There is something, and Kyungsoo already knows this, that Jongin still has to tell him. But there is something else too, which Kyungsoo has only just discovered, that he feels he has to say to Jongin, and for all he has tried he can't figure out what that is. What? What in this friendship feels so wrong? What in this blooming acquaintance feels so delicate?

Kyungsoo, for all its worth, doesn't get much sleep that night.

Because he hasn't spoken with Taemin for these past few weeks that Jongin has been avoiding him, he isn't expecting the boy to be stood by his locker early Monday morning a good ten minutes before the first bell of the day has rung.

"Taemin?" He questions, voice sounding strained even to his own ears. It suddenly strikes him that he hasn't really spoken to Taemin since that 'incident', and he can't help the way he shuffles uncomfortably where he has halted, hands wrapping tight around his crutches.

"Kyungsoo," Taemin says, lips stretching into a wide grin as he straightens himself up. "You're here."

Kyungsoo opens his mouth to respond, but can only blink up at the boy stood before him, unable to hold his gaze for longer than a second. Even now, he diverts his eyes to the ground, cheeks heating up as the scene from a few weeks back replays in his head.

"Yeah, hi," Kyungsoo manages to wheeze out, fingers trembling just minutely. He closes his eyes a moment, trying desperately to slow down his thoughts, and he doesn't think about how that looks, about what that tormented expression could be mistaken as, until Taemin's voice sounds out once more – small and cautious and suddenly so serious.

"I'm-" he starts, and when Kyungsoo looks up he is slightly startled to see how desperately sorry the boy looks, a worn furrow in his brows. "You-err- you don't want to speak to me, I get it. You're probably mad at me for, well, yeah, um... Being a . I, well- that's what I was going to clear up, or ask about really, but if you don't want me to be here then that's fine, I can go."

He says this all very quickly, a fast but stuttered vomit of words which Kyungsoo can't wrap his head around for a moment, and even more so when he gets a grasp on what Taemin is saying.

"Why do you think I'm mad at you?" Kyungsoo asks, genuinely confused. 

Taemin looks at him in a funny way, lips parted and eyes squinted like he doesn't get what Kyungsoo's saying.

"For- well, for ignoring you, surely?" Taemin splutters, blinking furiously down at Kyungsoo's small form. "I just- aren't you mad?"

Kyungsoo's brows furrow in confusion, and he finally reaches forward to open up his locker. 

"I'm not mad," Kyungsoo says. "You don't have to speak to me, it's okay."

But when Taemin only stares at him in unrestrained shock, a dazed sort of expression on his face, Kyungsoo closes his locker and tries to figure out what he's said wrong.

"What-?" He asks, blinking up at the taller boy, but Taemin interrupts him, something disbelieving in his features.

"Do you-" he starts, but then shakes his head and tries again. "Don't you care? You should be mad. You should want an explanation." He insists, something almost feral to the way he stares desperately down at Kyungsoo now.

But Kyungsoo only shakes his head and wears a small, understanding smile. "It's really okay Taemin, I don't mi-"

"No," he cuts in again, shaking his head and spluttering around. "No it isn't okay. No you shouldn't be okay with it. You don't deserve that, you should expect more, Kyungsoo."

Kyungsoo frowns again, shrinking into himself when he sees the look in Taemin's eyes, but it’s unwavering - obsolete in a show of sincerity.

"I don't- I mean, I don't really expect anything from anyone," Kyungsoo says finally, because it’s true – it’s always, without dispute, been true.

A short moment passes between them - a tense silence spreading around them in the corridor they stand in, minutes before the bell is due to ring.

Taemin's face changes. Where before there was harsh shock, now there is something like guilt paved into the furrow of his brows, something small and soft about the way his lips close and his Adam's apple bobs down his throat.

Kyungsoo can only stare back at him, waiting for the boy to speak, except when he does his voice has changed and the light in his eyes has dimmed.

"Okay," he breathes out, his shoulders hunching up like he's trying to understand. "Okay I- I have to go." Except he doesn't wait for a response - he only turns around from where he is stood, and starts to move away.

"Wait," Kyungsoo calls, making him halt almost simultaneously. Kyungsoo his dry lips, hitching his books higher into the crook of his arm. "Didn't you want to say something?" Kyungsoo asks, blinking furiously at the boy before him.

Taemin stares at Kyungsoo for only a second before he looks away again, expression sharp like he has been stung.

"Forget it," he insists, and then he whips back around and stalks away like he's never needed to get away from someone faster.

Kyungsoo only realises what went wrong when he’s halfway into his first period lesson.

It's funny how time works when you feel like someone's watching you, Kyungsoo thinks, trying to make light of the situation he is in.

Kyungsoo's always clung to the sentiment that being alone is the surest way of improving one's observational skills. The onlookers see most of the game - and he's always just been an onlooker. He picks stuff up this way, the small things which many may not be aware of or care to acknowledge. If someone's doing something in secret within this school, Kyungsoo either already knows of it or he'll find out about it soon after. He's gotten so good at it now that he's rarely ever wrong. 

It's why he knows, without even the smallest flicker of doubt in his mind, that the leader is watching him, and has been doing so all day. He's been trying to be discreet about it, diverting his gaze every few seconds and making himself look busy in case Kyungsoo turns around, but it hasn't worked well.

In a way, it's worse; the surveillance. Kyungsoo isn't sure what the eyes boring into the back of his head mean. His bullies have been so quiet today, so unnervingly casual whenever Kyungsoo has happened upon them during the walk to and from lesson, not even sparing him a withering glare or a quick insult as they saunter pass, and Kyungsoo has no idea what that means. 

The few times he's been able to peek at the leader, the boy has been holding his phone. Consistently and infallibly, like the rhythm of a clock as a ticks by each second, the leader has been checking the device throughout the day, his eyes expectant as he glances Kyungsoo's way as if waiting for something to happen.

Kyungsoo doesn't know what to think of it; he can't even make sense of it. It's as if the leader is expecting a message from Kyungsoo to suddenly pop up on his phone screen. 

It is, perhaps, the most disarming thing the leader has ever done, and it's with these edgy worries spiralling through Kyungsoo's mind, that he stumbles upon Jongin, several minutes before fourth period is due to start, lounging in his desk in the empty classroom with his eyes closed, head tilted back, and headphones pressed firmly into his ears. 

Kyungsoo can't help the way he flounders at the door, staring at the other boy's relaxed form. Unsure about how he is supposed to act in this situation, or if he should make his presence known, he lingers where he is stood, nibbling at his lower lip and darting his gaze around the room in his indecision. His uncertain movements must give something away though, because Jongin suddenly starts speaking, and Kyungsoo freezes in place. 

"I know you're there," the boy says from where he is sat, still not opening his eyes. "You may as well sit down."

Kyungsoo jolts at the instruction, cheeks blooming an embarrassed red as he ducks his head and silently crutches his way to his desk, turning at the end seat on the second row. He pauses here a second, taking a deep, calming breath in and out through his nose and reaching up to pat away the faint flush on his cheeks, and when he finally makes to settle himself down, he almost startles at the hand which suddenly curls softly around his arm to halt his movements.

He gasps in shock, he can't help it, jolting as if to move away, but then he feels Jongin's warm breath against the side of his head, and his voice which calls out, almost a pur, "let me help," - making Kyungsoo tense and relax all at once. Before he knows what's happening, he's letting Jongin manoeuvre him where he wants. He lets the boy guide his arms from his crutches, lets him hold the weight of his body as he slips off his bag, s and removes Kyungsoo's coat, pulls out a chair and lowers Kyungsoo onto it, and it's all with such slow and measured movements, feather light touches and scrapes of knuckles against Kyungsoo's back, his arms, the bare skin of his wrists as Jongin leans down to settle his crutches aside. Kyungsoo is barely breathing, mind hazy as the warmth of Jongin's body presses even closer still after, and the boy, like he doesn't know what he has just done, shoots Kyungsoo a small, nervously unsure, smile. 

"I-" he starts, and then he shakes his head and repositions the words in his head. "I'm not going to do it again - I'm not going to ignore you again," he extends, like he's afraid Kyungsoo won't know what he's talking about. "You can- we can- I mean- can we be normal with each other?" He splutters out, and it's so endearing, the way he can't look Kyungsoo in the eye as he says this. "Is that- I mean- would you... Like that?" 

Kyungsoo blinks slowly at the boy before him. His nervous, jittery state, the way he is so unsure in that moment, so perfectly human in a way Kyungsoo has never before seen him act, works like a spell on Kyungsoo's body. Every tendon, every muscle he possesses which has tensed at the abrupt proximity, relaxes all at once, and he doesn't even think about it before he grants a smile back.

"I would," he assures, lips stretching just that slightest bit wider when Jongin visibly sags, ill-disguised relief washing over his features.

"Good," Jongin beams, and Kyungsoo thinks, I know. 

"Do they have nothing better to do?" Kyungsoo wanders just before his body is slammed up against the wall behind him.

He suppresses the hiss which threatens to escape his lips, and blinks up at the leader who looms over him today, his two cronies flanked by his side like in the old days.

Kyungsoo hadn't even seen him coming, hadn't even heard his steps behind him as he crutched onwards towards the support group centre after school. He should've been more prepared, he realises now, belatedly, thinking back to what had happened just last month, when Yixing had kept him safe, and what has been going on all day. He should've been more aware, and more ready when the leader had grabbed a hold of him and tugged him towards a hidden, quiet pathway he didn't even know existed.

Even as he's cornered, and leaning way too much against his crutches, Kyungsoo is glad that the leader hadn't followed him the whole way to the support group. He doesn't want the boy to know about it, he doesn't want it to be taken away from him like everything else in his life has been. In the back of his head too, he thinks, "at least they won't find out about Jongin," and the thought makes him smile.

"What are you so happy about?" The leader seethes, looking mutely disgruntled. His hands press down against the brick by each side of Kyungsoo's face, and Kyungsoo's smile melts, his situation hitting him square in the face, like he'd let himself forget. 

He's about a minute or two from the support group building - far enough for his intended destination to not make any sense. He knows the leader's curious though, by the way he leans in close and asks, "where was the off to today?", a mocking sneer clouding over his curiosity. 

Kyungsoo remains impassive, expression clear even as the boy in front of him twitches in frustration.

"That doesn't matter anyway," he says eventually, stepping back and letting Kyungsoo breathe. "That isn't why we're here."

But before Kyungsoo can even comprehend the spoken words, the two cronies from the back have suddenly reeled forward, and crowded up around him.

"Hey what-?" Kyungsoo starts, but his words end in a choked breath when hands suddenly start grabbing at his coat jacket, slowly tugging the zip down, pressing up against his chest. Kyungsoo squawks in shock, a jolt of fear like none he has ever felt before wracking through his body, and he struggles away faster than he has ever struggled before, pressing his casted-up leg, suddenly insignificant, against the gravel ground beneath him to plaster himself closer to the wall.

"Sto-stop- what are you-?" Kyungsoo stutters, trying to move his arms from out of his crutches and shove the others away.

It's only when a hand, sly, grazes against the skin of his neck, that Kyungsoo comes to life. 

"HELP! HEY, HELP-" he starts to yell out, but the leader abruptly presses forward, wrapping a hand over Kyungsoo's mouth and muffling his cries in the fabric of his gloves. 

"Calm down," the leader says, staring at Kyungsoo with wide, slightly startled eyes, but Kyungsoo can't be calm when the hands on him finally tug open the material of his coat, and latch themselves onto his school blazer, incessant, sickeningly warm claws running over the side of his chest through his school shirt.

Kyungsoo yells out again, writhing to escape the hands whispering over the materials of his clothes, and there must be something so notably panic stricken in his eyes at that moment, for the leader's harsh gaze slips straight off his face in the space of a single second.

"Wait, you don't think-" he starts to say, but his sentence never gets the chance to finish before he is suddenly strung back, the cronies by his side tugged away with a similar amount of force, and Kyungsoo can only take one short breath of air before his knees give in and he crumbles against the wall. 

"Hey, this isn't what-" Kyungsoo hears the leader start to say, his tone wired, but then there's a sickening thump breaking through the stillness, like someone's just been punched, and the words die out in a pained sort of grunt.

"You sick s," Kyungsoo hears, a new voice, a low, grumbling rumble, one he vaguely recognises, and when he opens his eyes to see what is happening, not sure when they had fallen shut, he can't see through the blur of tears in his eyes. 

There's a sound of a struggle, like people are being dragged to stand upright, and then another voice, calmer than the other, saying, "I ought to kill you."

This voice though, unlike the other, is one Kyungsoo identifies instantly, the words swimming through his head as his vision starts to clear.

"T-Tao?" He questions through trembling lips, finally seeing the scene before him.

Tao is really there, the scuffs of both the cronies shirt collars strung tight in white fists. With him, and Kyungsoo wonders how he hadn't automatically made the connection, is Kris, and he has both hands clutched into the leader's blazer, his taller form looming over the other boy's with an uncanny, threatening sort of ease.

All of their expressions are twisted with an alert fear, something Kyungsoo has never before seen on their faces, but Kyungsoo gets why because Tao looks about ready to kill, his eyes dark and hard set as they glare down at the two boys before him, and Kris is practically growling in the leader's face with how close he has moved.

When Kyungsoo looks up though, and meets the other's gaze, Tao's expression immediately softens into one of worry, his eyes raking over Kyungsoo's small form, and zoning in on his awkwardly bent leg stretched out before him.

"Kyungsoo," Tao breathes, not even flinching as he shoves the two cronies away in one hard and swift movement. Tao turns around and approaches Kyungsoo slowly, carefully, his movements hesitant and unsure as he crouches down to Kyungsoo's level.

He helps Kyungsoo up easily, settling him on his feet with his crutches straightened out like they should be, and he rights Kyungsoo's clothes with slow, gentle hands, like he's scared Kyungsoo might break from more abrupt movements.

"Are you okay?" Tao asks, his gaze searching as he waits for Kyungsoo's response. "Are you hurt? Did they..?" He says, the sentence ebbing out, but the leader, his lip bloody from what Kyungsoo can only assume was Kris' doing, cuts in before Kyungsoo can respond.

"We weren't doing that!" He insists in a garbled breath, but his words die out when Kris lets out a menacing growl, hands clenching tighter around the fabric of the leader's shirt.

"ing shut up," Kris hisses, teeth grit like he's ready to punch again, and the leader doesn't need telling twice. 

"I'm okay," Kyungsoo assures Tao, "it's okay really, I'm just-" but it sounds fake even in his head, and he swallows his words before he can finish, head ducking down as he bites hard at his lip. 

Kyungsoo can't think straight, his mind a jumble of flurried emotion. His bullies, for all the terrible things they have done, have never attempted something like this. It doesn't make any sense to Kyungsoo; it doesn't feel right, no matter which way he thinks about it. He never thought they would ever go this far, never really thought they were the type, and it scares him to no end to know that he had judged them so wrong.

"Let's just go, okay?" Tao suggests, and Kris immediately protests, his eyes flashing and nostrils flaring as a snarl rips itself from the back of his throat.

"They aren't worth it, Kris," Tao says, arm wrapping around Kyungsoo to hold him steady. "Let them go."

Kris sends Tao a look (that's the last thing he wants to do), but Tao only stares back at him with his firm, cat-like eyes and the boy, after only a bare second's pause, loosens his grip, reluctantly taking a step back.

With their leader now free, the cronies don't hesitate as they start to run away, not looking back. The leader, on the other hand, falters for the shortest of seconds, sending Kyungsoo a look the shorter boy can't make sense of, before following quick the way the other two had gone. 

"Let's go," Tao repeats, coaxing Kyungsoo around to start walking back towards the centre.

And for the first time in a long while, Kyungsoo lets himself be weak, lets his lower lip quiver in a fear he rarely allows to be shown, and lets himself rely on the protective presences around him; the people who care for him like so few before have shown they do.

A/N

God I loved writing the Kaisoo scene.

And Junmyeon is so fun haha 

BUT WOAH WTF JUST HAPPENED WHAT OMG WHAT DID THAT DID THEY- yeah

This wasn't part of the plan, but wo-Ho it happened. 

Don't go hating on anyone too soon guys. All will be explained ;D

PLEASE COMMENT YOUR OPINIONS BELOW <3 opinions are bae, I love comments, you guys rock, thanks for reading ^-^ x

AND BECAUSE THIS GIF MAKES ME SMILE