Novaturient

             - (adj.) desiring or seeking, powerful change in one's life, behavior, or situation. 

        “Do you think he really doesn’t know, or is this how he deals with this?”

         Baekhyun shrugged, not bothering to lift his head off of Sehun’s legs. They sat together on one of the couches in the living room. It was the only part of the House that didn't have any ghosts in it that day. Sehun sitting on the end while Baekhyun lay stretched out beside him. They could see Kai flitting about through the ceiling above them. The House seemed to be feeling transparent today.  Baekhyun was sure Kai couldn’t see them. To him, the House was actually a house. One he thought he'd bought. It both amused and worried him. What reaction would the House have to someone who didn’t know they were dead?

        “I have no idea,” Baekhyun murmured, tracing random patterns onto Sehun's jeans. “I don’t think he does either." Sehun sighed, tugging softly at Baekhyun's hair. He slid his thin fingers through the light brown hair. Baekhyun slid open one of his eyes to glance up at the boy unpacking his things. “He’s got a lot of stuff….more than anyone else. Did the House give it to him?”

       “I don’t know where else it all came from. Sure as hell he got more than me.”

       “I wonder how he died,” Baekhyun said, closing his eye. He curled up tighter. Sehun’s body was like ice. He had no heat of the living. It didn’t matter to him. He was as cold as he. Ghosts didn’t need to be warm. Baekhyun wanted to comfort of having something near. The House didn’t really let him feel anything other than ghosts. Even the House wasn't always complete. They could flit through it as if it wasn't even there. Only the ghosts felt real.  Sehun, however, was the only one he wanted to feel. Chen was funny, but not a close friend. Kris and Tao apparently had fallen madly in love with one another. (To Sehun’s disgust). Suho was always philosophizing about his death, Lay was bitter. Bitter as hell. Luhan and Xuimin were caught up in each other. Xiumin might care about Baekhyun. Luhan certainly wouldn’t.

        “There’s the lovebirds,” Sehun said.

        Speaking of them. Baekhyun grunted, curling up into a ball. He assumed Sehun was watching them, but he didn’t open his eyes to look. They were probably either kissing or holding hands. It seemed to be all they ever really did. “I don’t really care,” he replied. “But apparently you do.”

             Sehun tugged his hair hard. Baekhyun gasped and swatted at his hands. “I’m curious,” Sehun tugged again. Baekhyun growled unhappily.“If they’re so happy with each other, why haven’t they moved on?”

            “Maybe they don’t want to.”

             “Do you really think the House cares what they want? That isn’t how the rules work.”

            Baekhyun snorted. She heard Kai swear as he dropped something on his toes. If you acted like a ghost they wouldn’t hurt. “How do you know the rules Sehun?”

             “I made them up, learned them, heard them, who cares? They exist. Someone made the House, the House follows its rules.”

              “Why bother following rules?”

              “Because Baekhyun,” Sehun said, resuming tugging gently at his hair. “Rules keep things together, and the In Between, Hell, Heaven, and here, needs to be kept together. Otherwise all of this,” here he waved his hand recklessly around Baekhyun's head. “Vanishes. Rules keep order.”

             Baekhyun laughed. Sitting up, he caught his flailing hands in his. “Rules do keep order, but the rules are ing me over. I have no memories, no future, no box, no way out of this House! Wait- I take that back. I remember some things, but they’re either useless or horrible.” His smile slipped away into a scowl. Sehun interlaced their fingers together, tugging him onto his lap. Baekhyun went, perhaps unwillingly. Sehun smiled, a tinge of sadness on his face. Baekhyun paused. He’d never seen him smile in complete joy. Bitter sweetness. The best he could offer.

             “What do you remember?” Sehun asked softly.

             “Water,” he whispered, leaning his head on the other boy's shoulder. His voice felt hoarse. Ugly, ugly memories surfaced. His skin crawled at the memory of them. It felt dirty, as if he needed to claw his skin off to rid himself of it. “I’m underwater, my legs hurt. I’m bleeding, the water’s red with my blood. The back of my head aches, and all I can think is he left me.”

             Sehun became still as death. “He?” he muttered. “Who left you?”

              Baekhyun shuddered. Already his heart twinged with the pain of heartbreak. “I don’t know who. Just he left me to die. Sehun I loved someone. He obviously didn’t love me, because he left me to die in the water.” A tear fell down his cheek. It burned like ice. “Do you think maybe he was the one that killed me?”

              Sehun snarled, wrapping his hands around his waist. He dragged him as close as he could. He could feel his nails scrapping his skin, his breath on the back of his neck. Shun hissed into his ear. “He was an idiot Baekhyun. An idiot. Only idiots kill what love them. And if I had been in his shoes, I’d have dragged you out of there. I’d rather claw my eyes out than hurt you.”

            It was Baekhyun’s turn to fall still. “Would you have saved me Sehun?” he whispered. He wasn’t trying to be cruel, but something wicked sparked inside of him. Something as cruel and twisted as the House. Baekhyn shook as he asked him. “You don’t strike me as someone who’d care about a tiny boy drowning in his own blood.”

             Sehun laughed wildly. He pushed Baekhyun off of him. He bounced slightly on the couch. Baekhyun stuck his tongue out at him. Sehun did the same. He shook his head, leaning back to lite his cigar. “You’re right of course. I was a rich, snot nosed brat whose parents poured everything they had into. I was the center of the universe as far we all were concerned.”

            “So if you had it perfect, why end up here? Did someone murder you?”

            “No,” he coughed smoke into the air. Baekhyun waved it away with a brush of his hand. Sehun sighed. “I did that myself. I went to a party in some rich kids’ club and a ‘friend’ of mine gifted me some hard core drugs. I took ‘em, and before I had my twentieth birthday I was so addicted I couldn’t breathe without them.” He glared at her. “If we’d met, I’d probably have been so high I wouldn’t have even seen you.”

            That was harsh. Harsher than Baekhyun had been expected. The wicked flame in his chest died. Now it felt hollowed and cold. He let his body go limp on the couch. Above, he could hear Kai still putting away his things like a human. Suddenly Kai's unawareness of his own death grated on his skin. How dare he think he’s alive when Sehun has to deal with his hell of a death? Why does he get the easy way out? “It’s alright Sehun,” his voice quivered. “You probably didn’t live anywhere near me. It would never have happened anyway.”

          Sehun smiled his bittersweet smile. It made Baekhyun want to reach out and touch his face. He didn’t because he knew all he would feel was ice. “Probably not,” he said easily. “Lay says your clothes mean you died recently, maybe even within a year in Earth time. So maybe in the 2000s. That's when he died. Me? I died in 1986, so I really doubt we’d ever have met.”

            Baekhyun jerked upright. “1986?” Hishead buzzed. Pieces of time flickered across his vision. Dates, history, a sense of belonging. The House doesn't keep time, it is forever. The worlds spun in his head. They came from the shadows so quickly he didn't know if he thought them or if the House had said it. It was dizzying. “I-I think I was born in 19-” he stopped, frowning in concentration. “No I was born after that. You died before I was born.”

          Sehun flicked his forehead. “So it really doesn’t matter does it?”

          Baekhyun flopped back on the couch. Above, he saw Kai lay down on the bed as if to sleep. Ghosts didn't need sleep. They all did it anyway though. Perhaps to feel at least a little human. He laughed. “No it doesn’t.”

           Kai was really beginning to get on Baekhyun’s nerves. Apparently his delusion of life wasn’t dispersing any time soon. He had thought it wouldn’t mess with his own undead life. Why would it? The other ghosts rarely interacted with each other on a daily basis. Kris stayed with Tao. They claimed they were in love. Everyone except maybe Chen was too afraid to tell Kris otherwise. Luhan and Xiumin never left each other’s side. They most definitely in were in love. Lay and Suho stayed to themselves, Chen appeared every so often, but he liked to just drift around and sing sometimes. He had a beautiful voice. It floated through the House like a whisper of Heaven. Sehun and Baekhyun stayed close together. They didn’t have anything better to do. Kai somehow managed to find and mess with every single ghost in the House.

         It was as annoying as hell so they decided to make his life a living one. Pranks. They pulled pranks on him. They started out small, like screaming while he was asleep. He didn't seem to bothered by it though. Soon they escalated into throwing him across rooms. Lights flickered constantly, his belongings smashed. The walls were painted red with blood. All of the ghosts thought it was novel to haunt. They weren’t in the world of the living and so had nobody to screw with. Kai was dead, but he didn’t know that. He was the closest thing they had. So they mutually agreed to poltergeist the crap out of Kai

         He still didn’t understand.

        The worst part of it all was Kai seemed determined to understand how they came to be ghosts. Namely, he wanted to know how they died. He didn’t let it go. On by one they all told him. Twisted, ghastly stories Baekhyun had heard before. He didn’t care if the other ghosts told him their stories. Those were theirs to tell. Baekhyun’s was his own though, and he didn’t even know it. I can't remember why I died....

         “Kai,” he said in exasperation. The boy was an idiot. An idiot. He’d just ghosted through a darn wall and not even noticed. He thought he was living? Not a chance. “Kai you want to know how I ing died? I’ll tell you.” Baekhyun felt the wicked glimmer flicker in him again. Maybe it was the House making him do it. Or maybe it was just hiz own vicious nature appearing. Either way, Bekhyun felt like lying.

         “My name is Baekhyun, I died when I sixteen years old,” (that age sounded right). “I lived in Seoul in 1970s and 80s as a servant to a rich family. I worked my off, but I survived.”

          Kai nodded. Baekhyun wanted to crack his head open. He truly was an idiot if he was buying these lies. Then again, all he ever had done to him was lie. He didn’t know any different. He had no truth to compare his lies to. “So what happened?” he prodded. Gosh his eyes were like a puppy. So trusting, so open, so trusting. He wondered if the House would kill the light in his eyes.

          “I fell in love with the son,” the words tasted black in his mouth. Like burnt coffee and the emptiness between stars. The aching twinge returned. Water, water over my head.. Choking, drowning, falling. So damn cold. I'm dead. Tears slipped down her cheeks. Baekhyun wiped them angrily away. “But two guys loving each other was forbidden. So forbidden he married someone else. So I leapt off the roof and landed head first on the concrete below.”

            Kai looked horrified. “Really?”

            “Turns out I survived and was brutally murdered by a serial killer three months later." Kai stopped, eyes widening in realization. Baekhyun laughed, shoving him down the stairs. "No idiot I’m lying to you.” He drifted away through the stairs. He ignored Kai’s cries of pain. He’d heal whether he realized it or not. “Don’t trust everything ghosts tell you. We’ve all got secrets to hide.”

          He shuddered as he vanished through the floor. “I’m going to go see Lay. Call for Suho if you break some bones. He’s the only one who knows about first aid.”

           Chanyeol never thought death would be like this. He had thought Heaven would be made of fluffy clouds and light. Angels soaring upon their white wings. His mother had been Catholic. She said Heaven was like that. And Hell? Hell was where he thought he was going, but this wasn’t that either. Hell was fire and pain. Screaming souls and devils with horns. He wasn’t in either of those places.

           “Hello?” he screamed, trying to be heard of the roar of the taxi. “Hello?”

           “What is it?” The driver yelled back from the front. Chanyel couldn’t even look at him. Every time he did the driver changed. Tall, short, long hair, bald. All the driver seemed to be was static buzzing across his vision. Chanyeol clung to the side of the taxi. It whizzed through the darkness so fast it made Chanyeol’s head spin. His stomach lurched. I’m going to be sick….Chanyeol shook his head, trying to not throw up.

            Oh my God I’m dead.

           “Where am I?” he managed to ask. “What is this?”

           “The TAXI of the AFTERLIFE!” The taxi driver roared. The car took a sharp turn, flinging Chanyeol across the back seat. He cried as the seat belt dug into his skin. Already he felt bruises forming Could the dead bruise? Another sharp turn followed by searing pain across his chest told him yes.

              “Where’s it going?”

               “Well it goes EVERYWHERE,” the driver screamed. “But for you, it goes to the In Between. It’s not Heaven nor Hell, your mother would call it Purgatory.”

               C’hanyeols head hurt….he knew why it hurt. The memories crashed through his mind. Burning, swirling, angry memories. He winced, then they were gone. Nothing more than whispers in the wind.

            I shot myself. I killed Baekhyun’s murderer, then Shion, and finally I shot myself.

            It should make him sick. Strangely, he did not care. His chest had an aching hole inside. A yawning, black hole that took and took but was never satisfied. It was only cold. Colder than death. Colder than murder. I need Bakhyun. That thought gripped him as nothing else could. Chanyeol leaned forward, shouting to be heard over the clanking.   

           “There’s someone who died before me,” he called out. “A boy. He was just a small boy. His name was Baekhyun, where is he?”

           The taxi began to drive upwards. Chanyeol felt himself being pressed into the back of his seat. His teeth rattled in his skull. They seemed a bump away from rattling out of his mouth. The black gave way to blinding light. Chanyeol closed his eyes. “I know all the Lost Souls!” The driver called back cheerfully. “He came by here two months ago. Scared out of his mind and so confused. That poor CHILD.”

            “Scared?” Chanyeol forced himself forward. Clawing at the back of the seats for support, he called out. “He was scared?”

            “Everyone’s scared! Death is terrifying, especially for those who don’t remember dying.”

             Chanyeol shook his head. Baekhyun had been scared. Alone and scared, trapped in the back seat of a hell taxi. We should have been together! We should have died together.

             “Where is he? Where did he go? Please, please tell me I need to know.”

              The driver clicked his tongue. “He’s inside the HOUSE now. The HOUSE welcomed him gladly and there he stays. Happy or no, I know not. He’s THERE.”

              Hope flooded his heart. His fingers dug themselves into the frayed fabric of the seat. “I’m I going to the House?” he asked, daring to hope it was true. “Are you taking me to Baekhyun?”

             The Driver shook his head. Chanyeol thought he did. He wasn’t sure. Their conversation made his head scream. “No,” the Driver roared. “No, he’s in the HOUSE you see. He’s THERE and you’re going HERE. You’re going to what the Lost Souls call the GRAVEYARD. Those who kill sometimes wind up there. You’ll work off your sins and vanish into the In Between!”

             Chanyeol’s heart stopped. He shook in his seat, eyes widened with horror. He lashed out, kicking at the doors. “What?” he screamed. “No you’ve got to take me to Baekhyun! I died so I could find him, I need to apologize. I’ve got to make things right.” He struggled to open the doors. They were locked. The door didn’t even have handles. “I can’t go the Graveyard. I need to go the House. I need to find Baekhyun!”

         The driver laughed. The roar filled the taxi. Chanyeol threw his hands over his ears, burying his head into his lap. The taxi swerved recklessly. The laughter turned into a high pitched scream. Growing louder and louder until he though his ears would burst.

         “To the House we go!!”