Litost -  A state of torment created by the sudden sight or realization of one's own misery. 

        Baekhyun kept telling himself he was used to being dead now. He didn't bat an eye when he ghosted through walls, threw couches, or realized he was never going to change. It was all part of his new "life". He saw Lay settle in quietly, the ghost keeping to himself out in the gardens. He saw Suho drift through the House, checking on all of the ghosts. He saw Sehun screw around and Luhan cling to Xiumin like the boy was his life line.

       He saw it all and he wanted out.

       Groaning, Baekhyun felt the bile rushing out of his stomach. Ghosts didn't have to eat. He hadn't since he had arrived, however long ago that was. But he couldn't help but throw up at the onest of his memory. It was all still fuzzy, just bits and pieces of someone who was him but was unrecoginizable in so many ways. The things that stood out from the muddled mess were horrible. People screaming, him screaming. Water rushing over his head, dirt under his fingernails and air being out of his lungs. THAT one came next. The faceless one who started chasing Baekhyun down.

       Baekhyun knew he was seeing his own death.

       Damn it he wanted to forget. 

      Weakly, he pulled his head out of the toilet. Leave me alone, he begged. I don't want to know anything about it. No blood, no dirt, no leaves, no scarves. 

       Baekhyun stopped there. He rememebered next to nothing about his life, something that Sehun had told him was rare in the Ghost House. But he remembered enough to realize that he had forgotten something important about that day. Something horrible. He didn't want to rememeber it. Something told him if he did, whatever peace he had would be shattered beyond repair.  

      Flushing the toilet, Baekhyun staggered out of the bathroom. He need air. Why did it seem like the House was trying to suffocate him? It wasn't like it could kill him. He rubbed his stomach. Throwing up while living was bad, but then you could only throw up food. When you were dead, you could throw up whatever organ you obviously didn't need anymore. If Sehun came and bothered him now, Baekhyun would kill him. 

       But Sehun was dead too. 

       We're all ing dead aren't we?

       Lost in his painful thoughts, Baekhyun didn't see Kris coming out of the study. They bumped into each other. Baekhyun, who was a child compared to the tall ghost, fell to the floor with a thud! Kris towered over him, awkwardly looking at him like he wasn't quite sure if Baekhyun was an idiot or if it was his fault. Shifting the cardboard box he was holding to his other hand, Kris offered his free hand to Baekhyun. Slightly embarressed, Baekhyun took it. Kris pulled him to his feet. 

      "Watch where you're going," he said gruffly. 

      Baekhyun nodded, still feeling slightly sick. He gestued towards the box. "What's that?" he asked. 

      Kris looked down at it. He shrugged. "It's my box," he said, as if that explained it all. "It holds things that were important to me when I was alive. Not the actual things of course, but representations of them." He tapped the top of the worn box. "I was just going through it again. Getting rid of things I don't give a about anymore."

      "Oh," Baekhyun said, trying to peer into it. "Where'd it come from?"

      To his surprise, Kris opened the box and pulled out a photo. He gave it to him. Baekhyun looked at it. It was a black-and-white photo of Kris. He was handsome, dressed in edgy clothing and leaning up against a brick wall in the city. He looked like a model. The idea of it was strange. Kris was once alive and he had a life of his own. Baekhyun hadned it back to him, that little glimspe into who Kris had been. 

      "I was different huh?" Kris asked bitterly. "I was a model," he said. "A pretty damn good one too. I was everywhere, Paris, New York, London, Tokyo."

     "What happened?"

     "I got hit by a car," Kris scowled. "The driver was drunk and it was raining. He slammed into me, realized what he'd done and took off. By the time someone found me, I had bleed to death on the concrete."

      Tragic. All of their stories were tragic. Suho had lived in a House identical to this one (Baekhyun blamed him for all its stupid quirks) and died of an illness with his grandfather watching over him. Luhan didn't talk a lot, but Xiumin had mention that he had died in a ty family environment. Both of them had. Sehun didn't "want to talk about it" but Baekhyun suspected someone shot the bastard out of spite. Lay said he'd died in a school fire. 

      He had been 17. A year older than Baekhyun was. 

      "Why don't I have a box?" Baekhyun asked. 

     "The House doesn't give boxes to ghosts who were murdered, killed themselves, or are poltergeists," Kris said. "Don't know why. No one's ever bothered showing up in this hell holl to explain anything. Not God, not Angels, not even a demon."

       Kris peered down at him as if seeing him for the first time. "How did you die?"

     Baekhyun glanced at his feet. "I think someone killed me," he said. 

     Dirt under his fingernails, blood pouring out from his leg and head. The water's over his head and he's screaming. He wants someone to come and they never do. He's alone.

      "," Kris said, pulling Baekhyun away from his thoughts. 

      Baekhyu stuck his tongue out. "I don't get a box then," he said.

      Kris nodded, then handed him the photo. "Take it," he said, walking down the hallway. "Now you've got something from the Other Side."

      Baekhyun stared at him. "Don't you want it?"

      "Naw," he said. "I've got more. Sehun tells me you're looking for a way to get deeper into the In Between."

       Apparently secrets did not stay secret for long. "Yeah," he said. "Do you know anything about it?"

        "Check the attic," Kris called back. "It's full of unusual things."

        "I've been up there."

        He laughed, drifting through the wall. "Check again. The attic's got a magic different from the rest of this place. If there's a way out, it's there. Look at the mirrors."

       hanyeol's mother told him to go to school. 

      Chanyeol’s mother told him he was being dramatic.

      She didn’t understand and wanted him to go to ing school. He scowled as he walked into his classroom. He didn’t want to be here. The only thing this place reminded him of was Baekhyun. Baekhyun, Baekhyun, Baekhyun…..Everywhere was Baekhyun. He’d left his mark on everything. The red of his hair was in the blood coursing through his veins. The brown of his eyes was in the earth and the dirt under his fingernails. The white of his skin was in the clouds and the haunting sound of his laughter raced by him in the wind. He couldn’t even breathe without seeing parts of him lingering. It was like Baekhyun had decided to haunt him. Chanyeol could feel him everywhere, running his slender fingers over the world to remind him he existed.

      Like he could ever forget him.

      Chanyeol sat at Baekhyun's old desk. The class had yet to start and the teacher was nowhere to be seen. Chanyeol heard the whispers of the students around him. They muttered amongst themselves. Some of them pitied him, others thought he should get over it. None of them understood what Baekhyun had been to him. More than a friend and he’d never ever told him. No, he’d been a coward and fled from it. Chanyeol was an idiot and he was paying the price.

       I was going to tell you I loved you.

      “Do you think he did it?” one girl whispered. “That’s what my mom says, but my dad thinks it might have been like a drug dealer or something.”

       Idiots. All of them idiots.

      You all hated him because he was better than you. 

      Maybe one of you killed him.

       “Chanyeol?”

        At the sound of the voice he tensed. He grabbed the edge of his desk, fingers digging into the wood. Chanyeol scowled. How dare he speak to me? After what he did? He slammed his hand on the desk and turned to glare at Shion. The pretty, petty boy gripped his books tightly, his face white and drawn as if he hadn’t sleep in days. That look was mirrored on Chanyeol's own face.

       “Chanyeol,” he whispered again. “I’m so sor-“

        Chanyeol stood up, towering over Shion. The boy was tall compared to many, but not to him. He slammed his books to the ground, eyes blazing in the anger he couldn’t take out on the killer. “Don’t you dare,” he snarled. “Don’t you ING DARE!” he throw Shion to the ground. His foot raised to kick him away from him. “I was going to be there!” Chanyeol yelled. “I was going to leave school and met him! But you-“

       “I didn’t mean to,” he protested, hands raised to defend himself. Shion looked like he was going to throw up. “I swear to God if I had known-“

       “Hey leave him alond," a student said. "He didn’t-“

       Chanyeol whirled around to punch the interloper in the face. The boy flew back into the desks. Girls screamed and ducked out of the way, papers flying into the air. The boy leapt up, charging Chanyeol in blind anger. Chanyeol was angrier. His rage came from his heart breaking and not having his ego bruised. He was stronger. Chanyeol shoved him aside and the fight began.

        “Didn’t do anything?” Chanyeol hissed. “Yes he did. He wanted to get back to together after I broke up with him. So he said he’d ruin B’s life if I didn’t meet him that day.”

     He kicked the boy to ground. Panting, he scowled at the ashamed Shion. “So I went to meet him. Baekhyun waited and waited and then he died.”

       Chanyoel shook his head and walked away.

        Shion is partly to blame. If I’d been there, Baekhyun would have lived or at least I’d have died with him.

       “Chaneyol are you okay?” Tae Won teacher asked, starteling Chanyeol. He reached up to feel the hot tears running down his face. He hadn’t realized he’d been crying. Chanyeol shook his head. I am not okay.

       Tae Won sighed, placing a comforting hand on Chanyeol’s shoulder. “It’ll be okay,” he said gently. “I promise you’ll be okay.”

       “It’s not about me,” Chanyeol said. “Baekhyun’s the one who died.” His mind raced and the horrible feelings he had trapped inside raged. “Someone killed him. He died while he was scared and I put him in that situation. Don’t tell me it’s going to be fine because it will never be fine.”

      His teacher shook his head. “No, no,” he said. “Chanyeol you can’t do this. Nothing you do will ever bring her back alive. It hurts like hell but you can’t hold on to it. Baekhyun was a beautiful boy who should’ve lived.” The last sentence was said regretfully. It was hushed as if it was more a thought than something to be shared. 

       And it felt strange. 

       Chanyeol stopped to look at him. The teacher stared out the window, eyes glassy with tears. “Everyone loved Baekhyun,” he whispered. “It’s a shame he died…” He shuddered and looked back at Chanyeol. “But he is died and we cannot bring him back.”

        Feeling numb, Chanyeol nodded. Kang Tae Won smiled and walked down the hall. “I’m glad you understand,” he called back. “Death is just a part of life.”

         It was. Death was a part of life. But it should never have been a part of Baekhyun’s life. Not until he was old and grey and ready to die. Not until his life had been played out. Not until he could do it peacefully knowing he was loved.

        That Chanyeol had loved him. 

       Why was I such an idiot?

         Chanyeol had sworn to find out who killed Baekhyun.

         As he walked back into the classroom, he heard Baekhyun’s laughter chiming in the wind outside of the window. He trailed his hands lovingly over the worn desk that had been his. Sighing, Chanyeol looked up at Tae Won as he began writing the day’s lesson on the board. Chaneol watched him, than looked back at the markings Baekhyun had left on the wood. He smiled because now he understood now. 

       Everyone loved Baekhyun! That's wrong. No one from this school noticed him. Those who did thought he was weird. He was different so they moved away. No one wanted anything to do with the brilliant boy who outshone them all.

       The only one who watched him, day in and day out, was Tae Won.