#06: open your eyes and you will see, you were never meant for me.

The one day Jongin dreads most every year is Valentine's Day. There have been few reasons before, two only, if he is honest, but with Sehee dating now, there is a third reason that weighs as much as a million other reasons.

Jongin can't spend the day with her anymore. No extensive dinner and then a movie marathon while comfortably cuddling on her bed. No hour long discussion on why it is weird to celebrate Valentine's Day once a year, as if it was enough to show your significant other how much you love him or her on that day only, when both Jongin and Sehee agree that all 365 days should be spent meaningful, giving love to one’s loved ones.

Jongin really misses Sehee next to him, now that he is lying on his bed, staring at the roof, all alone, when Sehee is supposed to be next to him, doing the same. As much as the thought of this and future Valentine's Days pains Jongin - he is sure that Sehee and Minseok won't break up soon, probably never, because Sehee is just that precious; no one would ever want to let go of her - the thought of himself being unable to confess to her hurts him even more. How can he possible confess when she is happily dating? Sehee has a soft heart. She will easily let him manipulate her and that is a thing Jongin doesn't want. He wants Sehee as she is, not formed by him in any way.

But The worst thing is not even the impossibility of him getting rid of his feelings by a simple confession, but the role of a reminder that Valentine's Day serves for him. Valentine's Day always reminds him not only of his love for his best friend and his inability to tell her, but of the first time he has admitted it, too, while breaking another girl’s heart.





Jongin has been dating before, once only. Back then, he has thought that his feelings for Sehee were of a brotherly nature. They grew up together after all, inseparable like twins. So when Jinri appeared, he was crushing on her.

Jinri was all Jongin could have asked for. She was pretty and gentle, eyes turning into crescents when she was laughing, and the air around her was radiating with a pure, innocent charme. Parts of Jongin denied that he initially liked her and agreed to go out with her because of the undeniable similarities to Sehee. He didn't think much about it back then, but in retrospect, that is the only explanation Jongin has for why he agreed to date the girl when they barely spoke more than two sentences each time they met before they officially started to date.

Jinri moved into the house next to his just a few months before, yet Jongin only met her a lot later. She went to a private all girls school, which explained why their schedules never collided. Her school was further away, and thus she would leave the house earlier in the morning than Jongin did, and Jongin was usually the one who came back later in the evening after spending time at Sehee's place.

The first time they met was on a weekend that Jongin spent at home. Sehee was visiting some far relatives because a cousin was getting married. Jongin had felt bored, but he soon found distraction by walking around town. And when it was around dinner time, he bumped into Jinri on his way home. They exchanged a few words, small talk only, but parted in front of their houses with good impressions on the other, more than good impressions probably, because it only took three more months with a few rare encounters for Jinri to confess. And Jongin agreed to go out with her.





Their first date couldn't have been more perfect with a Saturday afternoon spent in a café, then dinner and a movie. As any other middle school sophomores they were shy with skinship, soft smiles and stolen glances at each other. Their conversation was easy since they were still in the process of getting to know each other. Jongin learned of Jinri's passion for fashion