“I don’t know Yesung, he’s been in there for a day and a half. He skipped class. He hasn’t touched the piano.”

“B-b-but what happened?”

“I don’t know, he came back from class and he was like that. He just rushed in and went in his room directly. He hasn’t said anything since then, and he refuses to talk to me when I question him. I don’t know, I really don’t know.”

“Uuuh, okay, I’ll go in?”

Three quiet knocks and no answer was enough for Yesung to come in. Kyuhyun was sitting on his bed with his headphones on. Just...there. He wasn’t sleeping, he was just...there. Yesung sighed and walked over to the bed, unplugging Kyuhyun’s earbuds from the phone.

“Kyuhyun?”

He said nothing. Not moving.

“Kyuhyun, we need to talk.”

He blinked. That was progress.

“So you haven’t left your room in a while. Feel like getting some fresh air?”

Silence, again. Kyuhyun’s silence was never a good thing. Silence meant he was shutting himself off from the world. A bad thing, in other worlds. He figured he’d need to first break the silence, get Kyuhyun to talk about anything really before even broaching the subject of what the had brought this on.

“So my semester is looking super busy, I mean, I have so many papers due in the next few weeks I’m going crazy. And my Romantic prof assigned some intense Chopin. Of course I’m excited about it, but I’m sure you don’t agree with me,” he paused, hoping Kyuhyun would chirp in, but he didn’t. He continued, “Chopin is great and the base work is usually fairly simple, but you know how he is with accessory, you know the annotation he puts as totally not optional that the profs make you play? And Chopin is so nice sounding, in all his melancholy.”

Kyuhyun seemed slightly more receptive, he had subtly taken out his left earpiece.

“So I took a random class, right,  mistake on my part, so now I have to learn random instruments. I’m starting out clarinet...wanna coach me? I know you played it for a year in middle school.”

“Hmm.”

Kyuhyun had made a small noise and established eye contact. He wasn’t amused. Yesung continued,“I was thinking this weekend, if the weather is nice, we could go out. Walking somewhere, maybe?” Kyuhyun’s face turned slightly to disdain. “Fine, I get it. We can stay indoors all day and make out on my couch, interruption-free couch?”

“Hmmyeah.”

Coddling Kyuhyun was a doubled edged sword. He generally disliked it, but, in times like these, it was possibly the solution. Yesung had to tread the line carefully...or he could just ask. Kyuhyun valued directness. He couldn’t fault his boyfriend for asking the preferred method. “Alright, Kyuhyun, you know why I’m here, and you know, unlike your panicking roommate, that I won’t leave until we have a real nice talk.”

“Hmm?”

Kyuhyun was answering, or at least making noise consistently. Good, good. “You can talk, skip the chase, tell me everything, right now. I can coddle you into telling me your feelings which is also totally fine, I am a sweet talker with a beautiful husky voice, I can totally understand that you want to just hear me, and talking about your feelings is totally healthy and I won’t judge you.”

“Or?”

Yesung smiled, there, he had broken the silence. He put his hand on Kyuhyun’s thigh, in the middle, not too high just yet. He saw Kyuhyun’s quirked eyebrow and he knew at that point, that he would get the words out of his boyfriend’s mouth so easily. Kyuhyun had totally understood what he was getting at. “We talk first,” he declared. “And then you put your mouth to a better use.”

“You make a compelling argument.” A small smile had formed on his lips, “you’ve got yourself a deal, good sir.”

“Wise choice, good sir,” Yesung replied, reusing Kyuhyun’s expression. “Only a fool would doubt my ability to make you talk. At least you’ve got something in it for you.”

He snorted, “right, because only I benefit from it.” He sighed deeply, rubbing his hand over his face in frustration. “Ryeowook ed up.”

“He knocked up another girl?”

“That’s what I said, but no.”

“He wrecked your laptop?”

“That’s also what I said, but no, that’s not…” He took another calming breath. “He has been impersonating me in emails and on some legal documents for the past two months, but because of that, he’s won me a scholarship for a summer abroad in Austria.”

Oh.

Austria had been Kyuhyun’s wildest dream ever since he was a kid. Even before his accident, with his older sister having a promising career as a violinist, he had been made aware of the magical land of Austria, where the grand masters lived and died. It was the main reason he had kept up with his lessons for so long, it was the end goal; going to Austria, to live, study, or work there, any of those worked for him. Even after his accident, it was obvious that the dream lived on, despite the bitterness that it brought on. He knew he couldn’t go and experience it the way he truly wanted, but… he still wanted to go. Yesung had learned the hard way to never, ever, ever mention Austria. It made Kyuhyun angry, but mostly sad.

He had nothing to say in the light of this revelation. He could understand some of what Kyuhyun was feeling: betrayal, confusion, disappointment, anger, misplaced happiness? Ryeowook had definitely ed up big time. Big time. Yesung had to do something, he  had to help out, because knowing Kyuhyun, he’d internalize everything until it drove him crazy. He would have to break his number one law, and talk about Austria. Kyuhyun had brought it up first, but that didn’t mean it was any more pleasant for the both of them, to talk about the taboo topic. He cleared his throat and selected his words carefully, “he did that,” he declared in the most neutral tone he could muster,  “and you feel a great many things about it.”

“How could he do this to me! It’s illegal, you know. I could completely ruin his academic career, I could ruin his life. And he didn’t even… Like how could he do that to me! He was my friend! He lied to me for weeks, and he used my accounts and my information, and he meddled with my life. I didn’t ask for this. I know he thinks he had my best interest in mind, but he doesn’t ing get it. How could he?” Kyuhyun had slumped over and held his head between his hands. He looked so defeated. “How could he be so cruel to me?”

“Well what are you going to do about it?”

“I don’t know. I’m too angry to decide.”

Kyuhyun was not in the mood to fool around after that, so he just snuggled in Yesung’s chest and listen to his boyfriend’s random stories about his classes and his day at university. Yesung always rambled, which sometimes he found annoying but tonight he really appreciated the opportunity to not think about anything, especially not his recent betrayal.

“Kyu?”

“Yeah?”

“Next time you have a thing like this, don’t lock yourself in your room for a whole day, just call me alright? Or talk to Zhou Mi? Talk to someone, just don’t keep it all to yourself, you know it doesn't solve anything.”

Kyuhyun snorted softly into his boyfriend’s chest, “I can’t make any promises.”

Yesung slept over that night, doing nothing but sleeping. At least now Yesung knew what the was going on with his boyfriend. Kyuhyun was still upset about whatever had happened with Ryeowook. He just snuggled deeply his chest and said nothing. Kyuhyun had a complicated mind, full of repressed anger and issues, and complexes. Of course, life wasn’t easy, as someone who had had all their hopes and dreams, particularly this one,  shattered by a sudden loss of vision, but sometimes Kyuhyun… overthought things and made things worse by keeping everything up in his head. It was understandable, he had lived through some , was traumatised by some , was still angry about some of that , and despite the many therapy sessions, that stayed with him. This, Yesung imagined, would be one of those things that would stay with him. For a very long time.

It was certainly troubling that his friend had used his accounts and impersonated him for weeks. But from what Yesung had gathered, it wasn’t what bothered Kyuhyun the most. It had struck a nerve. Ryeowook had accidentally stumbled upon Kyuhyun’s most sensitive issue and just messed up everything. Kyuhyun’s reaction was understandable. His friend had probably noticed how much Kyuhyun seemed to favour the country, favour the idea of going there and experiencing it. He had probably thought he was setting up a most wonderful surprise… but that was most definitely not the case. What a fine mess. At least, Kyuhyun was sleeping peacefully. He had fallen asleep quickly after Yesung spent a few minutes running his fingers through his hair.

Maybe there was something to do about it. Maybe, just maybe, Yesung could try to broach the subject again and see if things were more possible than Kyuhyun thought…

The next morning, Kyuhyun was still in a better mood. He did try to get a bit handsy first thing in the morning, which was the main sign that things were going well. He wasn’t as enthusiastic as he normally would, but it was a start and it sure got little Yesung interested. It was nice and all, but he had to get more out of Kyuhyun before he could totally let himself get...carried away, to put it in a nice, PG-13 way.

“Kyuhyun, we need to talk,” he said breathily.

“Again?”

“Yeah, some more.”

“I’d rather do other things, you know. Like you. I’d rather do you.”

Yesung giggled a bit. Kyuhyun was always right to the point with his whims. “That is for later. Tell me, have you decided on anything?” Kyuhyun shook his head, sighed deeply, and stiffened up in Yesung’s arms. Those were all bad signs. He grunted a bit but didn’t give a wordy answer. Yesung had to prod him again for an actual answer. “Kyuhyun…”

“I don’t think I’ll…” He paused and exhaled loudly, “he didn’t do it out of malice, he wanted to make me happy, despite not knowing anything, he didn’t mean to… He’s just stupid. I can’t blame him for being stupid.”

“Kyuhyun… I don’t mean to sound insensitive but, why exactly can’t you just… go? You’re as talented as him, and you speak enough English to get by. There’s more to it by the way you’re reacting, but I’m just not getting it. Do you not think that things are… more possible than you think?”

“Yeah, everything would be fine if it was that simple, if I could ing see out of my eyeholes. But I can’t. I can’t cook, I can barely get by on the streets, I can’t live alone, how are you expecting me to spend four months abroad, in a new city, with a different language, all alone.” He paused, looking for his words, “you know, this has always been my dream, going to Austria and learning piano, traveling the world for music, and I always knew it was foolish because, well I’m not… I’m not normal, I have limitations, and after years and years, I’ve accepted it. But this, having my dream dangled in front of me, knowing full well it’s impossible…  is just cruel.”

Kyuhyun fell silent after that and Yesung just allowed it. He would have to see to it, either get Zhou Mi to leave with him for a couple months, or Siwon was the most adept at English out of all of them… or even… He’d have to investigate this. He wanted to make it happen for him. Of course he’d tell Kyuhyun about it - transparency was key - but he’d first need to check if it was even possible, to not get Kyuhyun’s hopes up unnecessarily.

They stayed in bed for a little while longer, but soon went to get breakfast. Zhou Mi had class early that morning, so he had left some pancakes for Kyuhyun (and Yesung) in the fridge. Pancakes were one of Kyuhyun’s main comfort food.

“What are your plans for the day?” Kyuhyun asked him.

“I have class this evening but I’m free until then. Why, did you have anything planned?”

“I have to clock in a couple hours of practice, but nothing else, no. Why, do you have anything planned?”

“Well, I told you yesterday I’ve got to learn clarinet. I’m sure I’ll manage, but my neighbours will not like me, not at first anyway. I’ve just gotten my party-hard neighbour to accept me playing piano at eight in the morning. It’s totally unfair, he’s allowed to play his ty house music until three in the morning but I can’t play some piano masterpiece at eight in the morning. Go figure.”

Kyuhyun laughed at him a little bit, his mouth full of pancake. “I can’t imagine all your squeaking will be pleasant for anyone. Do you even have a book? It’s pretty straightforward to learn, I mean, if I managed, it can’t be all that hard.”

Yesung did get some practice in, when Kyuhyun got his wandering hand off  of him. He just sat on his couch and listened. He would pipe up once in a while with a comment but he was mostly quiet. And then, when Yesung was expecting it the least, he dropped earth shattering news on him.

“I want to tell my parents.”

Yesung nearly inhaled his clarinet reed. “What?”

“I want to tell my parents. I think it’s time. I mean, we’ve been dating for months. I think our parents should know about it.”

Yesung frowned and chose his next words carefully, “what… exactly is prompting this?”

Kyuhyun shrugged, “I feel like… I feel like we should tell our parents. They should know we’ve been dating for a while now. It hasn’t been a year but I think they deserve to know.”

“Is this related to your… moral dilemma with Ryeowook?”

“Maybe? I don’t know, in times like these I’m questioning all my choices, including the one of not telling my parents.”

“All your choices?” Yesung whispered, a little worried. But Kyuhyun reassured him with a quick smile. This put his mind at ease. “Well, alright. I guess we could… tell them. I’m a little worried, I suppose...but if that’s what you want, I’ll tell my parents too. I’ll call them tonight.”

That night, Kyuhyun hesitated. He wasn’t sure he really wanted to tell his parents, but he felt that it would be one less thing on his mind. Yeah, that was the right thing to do. “Hey mom,” he said hesitantly.

“Kyuhyun! How is my favourite son?”

“I’m your only son.”

“Semantics, Kyuhyun. So how are you?”

He sighed, “I’m fine, I guess. I have something to tell you. I… I have a boyfriend.”

The was a surprise noise on the other end of the line, “good for you, Kyuhyun. I suppose it’s normal, since you, uh, you came out.”

“Yeah that’s not just it. My boyfriend… it’s Yesung.”

There was a silence which made Kyuhyun uneasy. Really uneasy. He would’ve much preferred his mom chirping a snarky answer immediately. But no, there was silence on the other end of the line. Too many seconds of silence. This was a mistake. He shouldn’t have told her.

“Well, it’s a little… He’s much older than you, which is… he’s not pressuring you into anything, right?”

“No, he… he knows and respects my boundaries.”

“Well,” her voice sounded a little bit strained, “I suppose… I suppose if it had to be someone… Yesung is a nice boy, we’ve known him for years. Were you… um, before, were you…?”

“No mom, we started dating a couple months ago, not when he was teaching me piano.”

“Oh. Good.”

“Okay,” Kyuhyun said a little awkwardly.

“Okay,” his mom answered equally awkwardly.

“Alright, well I’m going to hang up and go back to my essay. It was good talking to you,” he said in a hurry.

“Wait, wait, Kyuhyun,” she paused. “I’m happy for you. Yesung is a nice boy and I hope he makes you happy. He better make you happy.”

Kyuhyun smiled shyly, “he does mom.”

“Then I’m glad. I’m sorry if I was… If I sounded unsupportive, you just, you caught me off guard. I’m happy for you if you’re happy about your situation. I suppose it should’ve been expected, you two always had a lot in common and a lot of chemistry. I’ll tell your dad and your sister. I’m pretty sure she suspected it already.”

“Thanks, mom.”

Whilst this hadn’t made his situation any easier to deal with, but that was one thing less on his mind. It helped, somehow. Knowing that his parents, mostly his mom, were okay, or at least aware of his romantic entanglements made him feel strangely better. He was very close to his mom, her opinion mattered a lot to him. Having her support somehow made his other situation more bearable. He texted Yesung about it and went to bed. He didn’t have any more answers than he had earlier, but he felt better.

A/N

Look who's back from the dead? It's me! Your terrible author who is terrible at updating. This chapter has actually been done for a while I just didn't have the time to edit it. It's a little all over the place but that's all I have. It's also a bit longer than other ones too, but I mean, is that really a negative? I don't update in two or three months but I deliver a chunky essay size chapter. I haven't updated in so long that I've actually forgotten how to use the text editor. So forgive me if the text is all in bold, it happened and I don't know how to fix it. Anyway, despite the terrible formatting, enjoy this chapter, I should technically be able to update sooner because my semester finishes next week but who knows, next chapter could be in a week or in a year!