Chapter Five

Minseok was frantically pacing back and forth in his tidied living room that had been newly disposed of all pictures when Lu Han burst through the door, heaving and out of breath. His wig was lilting to the side and his sports bra was riding up his chest, not that he knew the difference. 

"Are they here? Am I late?" he asked, throwing himself forward in front of Minseok. His eyes scanned the interior of the house, searching for any human shape that he should be aware of. However, Minseok's house was just as empty as it had been this morning. 

Much to Lu Han's surprise, Minseok immediately recoiled from him, leaping backwards with an expression of complete shock. His eyes were as round as saucers. "Who in the world are you?!" 

"You don't even recognize me? Oh my God," Lu Han cried in frustration. He was about to have it with this whole ordeal. First, he had had the worst makeover of a lifetime, in which he had begun to question his existence as a man, then his frenemy had mistaken him for a model, and now his own best friend couldn't even recognize him. This day couldn't possibly get any worse. 

It took a moment before Minseok gasped, the realization dawning on him. "Wait, Lu Han?" He leaned his head in closer, examining the dolled-up face of his male best friend, who had miraculously undergone a significant metamorphosis over the course of a few hours. "What the hell happened to you?!" 

Lu Han threw up his hands. "Weren't you the one who begged me to be a girl?" 

"But I swear my best friend's voice does not belong to the face that I'm looking at right now," Minseok said, blinking rapidly in disbelief. He reached out a hand to cup Lu Han's jaw, then moved it left to right as if to scrutinize every inch of the guy's face. "This is freaky. Really freaky." 

Lu Han wrenched away in annoyance. "Yeah, imagine being in my place. You should be glad I'm kind enough to not kill you for what you've made me endure today," he growled.

Minseok didn't even hear him. 

"Holy sh*t, what is this?" His eyes had drifted down to Lu Han's attire, and now they were honing in on the two sizable lumps under his shirt. His head snapped back up to look at Lu Han, whose face had pinked significantly with the blush added on top of his cheeks. "Don't tell me you're wearing one of those too!" 

Lu Han stuttered, "W-well, it was a safety m-measure." His face was now belligerently hot with embarrassment. 

Minseok collapsed on the floor, his body consumed with laughter that sounded like mockery to Lu Han's ears. The latter was definitely not impressed. He folded his arms crossly and stared down at Minseok in anger. "If you keep making fun of me, I don't have to do this. I can easily walk out of here right now and leave you to deal with the repercussions." 

Minseok scrambled up from the ground, holding up one hand while the other clutched his stomach. "I'm done. I promise." 

Lu Han still couldn't help but eye him warily. He decided to drop the topic and move on to something that should be taking precedence right now. "So when are your parents coming?" 

That question brought Minseok back to his senses, and his face automatically reverted back to its frantic and flushed state. "Just any minute now, Lu Han! Quick, we have to practice!" 

"P-Practice?" 

Minseok nodded. "We have to know how to act like husband and wife for it to be believable."  He inched closer to Lu Han, then abruptly stopped, rolling his head up. "You're taller than me!" 

"I know..."

"Ha Ni is shorter than me!" 

This didn't faze Lu Han at all. He merely raised an eyebrow at Minseok and made a gesture to his own body. "Don't you think it's too late to be telling me that now?"

Minseok's expression fell. "Oh..." The loopholes in the plan he had was emerging one by one, and height, while the more aesthetic problem, was just as troublesome as having to act out a fake role. "I guess we'll be fine since they've never met Ha Ni. Maybe she'll just wear heels next time she's with me." 

Just as Lu Han was about to retort with a complaint, the purr of a car engine caused both males to turn their head to the open window where the noise was entering in from. The yellow flash of the taxi could not be easily missed, and Minseok jumped a foot in the air when he heard a door slam outside. 

"They're here!" he cried, slapping his cheeks with his palms almost hysterically. His feet dawdled in circles, speeding up more and more quickly as the seconds passed. 

Lu Han only watched him, feeling no inclination to help. After all, he was freaking out himself. How was he going to do this? Minseok may have the harder lie to face, but Lu Han had the harder role to act. 

The sound of the doorbell almost caused the nerves in the room to combust. Both males turned to look at the door, neither moving nor wanting to move.  Even under his blushing cheeks, Lu Han had paled as white as a ghost. 

It was only when the bell rang in rapid succession that they both jumped in alarm. Minseok snapped out of his daze and hurdled towards the door, tugging Lu Han behind him by the arm. 

With one hand on the knob, Minseok heaved a deep sigh. "You ready, Han?" 

Lu Han gulped nervously. "Ready as I'll ever be." 

They both glanced at each other, and in that very last nick of time, everything seemed to slow down. The screeching of the door opening was magnified by tenfold; the donning of fake smiles was akin to watching a painter slowly his brush across a blank canvas, pulling up corners of lips and pulling down crescents of eyes; and the arm slithering around Lu Han's waist and pulling him against the hard side of his male friend was disturbing and surprising enough to cause bile to rise up in Lu Han's throat. 

The elderly couple standing outside the door seemed just as surprised to see the sight. They were frowning, yet with eyes lighting up like lanterns as they beheld their son and his beautiful wife, whose face has drained completely of color in mere seconds. Lu Han couldn't help but be reminded of Carl and Ellie from Up as he stared at Minseok's parents with as polite a smile as he could force.