I must be bewitched by Jong Hyun and under his spell. After what happened in Japan. We haven't talked to each other. Okay, I avoided his call. Truth is I changed number. I don't want to entangle my life with his life. He's an idol and I am me.

But thing went differently with me. I religiously watched his drama and followed his activities. I went to their concert once. The most unbelievable I did was, I did hung a blow up photo of him in my wash room.  No one saw it yet. I thought about it when I moved to my new place. Yes I moved. Since I owned 2 buildings now, I moved to the one near my workplace and I owned one of the penthouse. I willed the other one to my partner though.

Months passed by. Jong Hyun's drama ended. I still have this unexplainable feeling. I miss him. I wanted to hold him. Talk to him. I think I am going crazy. These matters I can't talk to my 2 bestfriend. So when J mentioned he was in Singapore for a week conference, I flew to see him right away.

"J, I can't understand myself anymore," I was crying.

"Jen, you're inlove." he said and held my hand. "Why don't you confess to him? Look, we're in the 21st century. So what if he rejects you?"

"I can't."

J hit his forehead with his right hand. "God! That won't solve your problem. Listen to me Jenny, until you confess to him and find out his thoughts about it, you can't move on. You can't just be clinging to your one sided love."

"But..he was my..."

J cut in. "I understand. I know but what if it's just call of the flesh? Jenny, I am a man. I know those stuff." he held back my hand.

"I don't know J. I don't know. I think I'll gonna lose my mind if this things go on,"

"Goddamit Jenny Shin!" J's voice rose and I knew what that means.

I gave my phone to J with Jong Hyun's number on the screen. He pressed call button. He got a busy tone and just left a message.

"Jen, it's either you tell him or die," he glared at me.

"I hate you Jun Satoshi," I said softly.

He smiled. He knew that I understood what he meant. "I love you Jenny Shin. Now, you go back to Seoul and tell that bastard that you in love him. Hey, wait, you never mentioned his name. If it's Sang Woo I am going to disowned you," he hissed.

"nah. it's Jong Hyun." I said softly enough for him to hear.

"Good. Now, off to Seoul and call me tonight," he really is sending me back to Seoul.

"Thanks J. I wish you're just around,"

"You can fly to LA anytime. You earn much enough to fly back and forth," he teased. "I really gotta leave. I have people to meet,"

"Thanks. I'll see you soon," we both got up and I kissed him at the cheek.

I went back to Seoul with a heavy heart. I missed J and I want to spend more time with him. There are things that I can only share it to him. Jae and Jin Joo are my bestfriend but there's this feeling and security that I can only feel everytime I talk to J.

I went straight to the office and picked up the project that one of our engineer left. My boss asked me to review it. I thought there was just one but it's a pile. I dragged my self home with the papers on tow. I dumped the files on the coffee table and soaked myself on the tub right away. It was a tiring day. It was around 9 pm when I got out of shower and wrapped myself with a robe.  I brewed some tea and hugged the cup while I flipped channels trying to find good shows to watch.

"okay, you've been acting weird since your sneak out in Tokyo." Yong Hwa sat beside Jong Hyun who was fiddling with his guitar. "Your drama is done. What else is stressing you?"

"Nothing," Jong Hyun continued with what he's doing.

"Jong Hyun-ah, I knew you for years. Comeon, I am your brother. You know you can count on me. Whatever is bothering you, you can al..."

"Miss Lee. Jenny Lee, she'd been bothering me since I met her." he cut Yong hwa. "I don't know hyung.  I think I am inlove," Jong Hyun