"In the examination room."

"Please," Baekhyun snorted. 'Everyone's done that. Behnd Kris' pine tree.'

"Under the coffee table in the lobby," Jongdae retorted.

"In the girls bathroom." Jongdae looked at him weirdly. 'What?" Baekhyun asked.

"In the parking lot."

"Behind the bushes at the front."

"Are they seriously still at it?" Chanyeol asked Lay. "It's been like an hour."

Lay shrugged. "Whatever, at least it keeps them from using my closet again."

"What the hell are the idiots doing?" Kris asked them. Jongdae and Baekhyun were glaring at each other across the desk in the office. Chanyeol and Lay were sitting in chairs to the side, watching them. Kris pulled up a stool and sat on it.

"Seeing who's better in bed," Lay answered nonchalantly.

"Seriously?" Kris asked in disbelief. "Idiots. I'm the best, obviously."

"Luhan-hyung's couch."

"This could take a while," Chanyeol told Kris.

~

"Hyung," Sehun said. "I got my retainer taken out yesterday."

"That's great, Sehun, now can you take these files to the office?" Joonmyun asked, handing Sehun a shopping cart full of papers.

Sehun hummed as he got to the office. He knocked and opened the door. Jongdae and Baekhyun were arguing over the desk, and Kris, Lay, and Chanyeol were watching from chairs on the side.

"KRIS!" he hollered, interrupting the commotion.

"It's hyung to you, brat," Kris said. "Wait a second, you said Kris, not Krith."

"I got my retainer taken out," Sehun said proudly.

"Cool, now what are you doing?" Baekhyun asked him.

"Paper." Sehun dropped a stack of paper on the desk. Kris shrugged.

"That's not too bad."

Sehun dragged the rest of the paperwork in a shopping cart to the door, but it wouldn't fit through. "Nevermind," Kris said.

"Well, see you later," Baekhyun said, leaving the room. Jongdae waved, "Bye Krissy!"

"See ya, Krease," Chanyeol patted him on the back.

Lay noddded as he passed, squeezing through the door.

"Are you guys just going to leave me here?" Kris asked.

"Guys?"

"GUYS?"

Sehun popped his head in, "Oh, and Krissssss hyung I decided it's time for you guys to meet my boyfriend. We're going for lunch tomorrow. He's got reservations at McDonalds."

~

"Guys," Luhan said. 

"Shut up," Jongdae said, munching into his sandwich. Lately Lay had an obsession with Western food. 

"Luhan, put the fork down." 

"Luhan."

"Luhan, I am warning yo-"

" YOUR FORK I HAVE A KNIFE!"

"I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT A FORK CAN DO!"

"OH YEAH?"

"YEAH!"

"NO LAY!" Jongdae screamed when he was pried away by two hands around his waist. "ANOTHER MINUTE AND HE WOULD HAVE BEEN DEAD!"

"So," Joonmyun said, "What were you saying, Luhan?"

"We should have a girls night out." 

"You've been listening to Wonder Girls again haven't you." 

"Heechul hyung recommended it to me." 

"Actually," Baekhyun interrupted. "That's not a bad idea." The table stared at him too. 

"I need to stop having lunch with you guys," Kris groaned. 

"Exactly, Kris, you should come along!" Luhan said excitedly. 

"I'm going," Baekhyun announced. 

"Kris is going," Luhan said, doing a head count of everybody at the lunch table. 

"What, wait?" Kris repeated. "No, I'm not going." 

"You should come along, Jongdae!" Baekhyun said. 

Jongdae shrugged. "Sure." 

"Guys, I am not going on your-"

"Guess I'm going too," Lay said. "Someone has to keep Luhan and Jongdae from killing each other." 

"Does that mean I have to come too?" Minseok asked. 

"Sehun-ah, you can come!" Baekhyun said. "You just got your retainer out. Bring your boyfriend, too." 

"Sehunnie has a boyfriend?" Luhan asked quietly. "But you're too young to date." 

"I guess I'm going then," Minseok said, holding onto a flailing Luhan. 

"WHO IS IT? WHO DARES TO DATE MY BABY?" 

"I'm only four years younger than you, hyung," Sehun reminded him. 

"HE WILL DIE A PAINFUL AND AGONIZING DEATH!" 

Joonmyun sniffled. "He's all grown up now. Soon he'll be graduating and having children." 

Kris patted Joonmyun, handing him a tissue box. "Now, now, Joonmyun, the boyfriend still has to survive the Talk with me." 

"The talk?"

"No, it's the Talk, with a capital T." Joonmyun looked at him weirdly. 

Sehun shifted in his seat. "You guys know you aren't really my family, right?" 

Joonmyun gasped, and Kris glared at him. Luhan knocked over his chair. "I TOLD YOU MINNIE! DATING'S A BAD INFLUENCE!"

"You're disowning us?" Jongdae asked with teary eyes. 

"No, you were never my family in the first place," Sehun replied. 

"WU SEHUN HAVE YOU BEEN UNDERAGE DRINKING?" 

"Wait, why is your last name the family name?" Luhan questioned. 

"Because I'm manly," Kris answered, puffing out his chest. 

"You carry around a stuffed goat." 

"His name is Ace and he is a very stylish alpaca, thank you very much." 

"But I'm manlier." 

"Coming from the guy who sugggested a girls night out?" 

"IST!" Luhan screamed, jumping out of his chair again, knocking it over in the process. 

"LUHAN PUT THE ING FORK DOWN!" 

"REVENGE!" 

"WHY ARE YOU HELPING HIM, BAEK?"

"I don't know," Baekhyun stopped, thinking for a moment. He shrugged, "Well, Luhan and Jongdae had to learn from someone, didn't they? A teacher always helps his students. Besides, attacking Kris is fun. Try it." 

"Is it really?" Minseok asked. Baekhyun nodded eagerly, he handed Minseok a spoon. 

"What do I do with a spoon?" Minseok asked obliviously. 

"I'll show you," he smirked. 

"BAEKHYUN GET OFF OF ME!" 

"REVENGE!" 

"WHAT HE SAID!"

", BAEK CORRUPTED MINSEOK-HYUNG!"

~

Luhan, Minseok, Lay, and Jongdae arrived at the same time. In different cars of course. Lay had learned his lesson about putting Luhan and Jongdae together. He shivered at the thought of it. The Xiuhan couple walked to avoid dying, since Luhan insisted that he was manly and either he drove or they walked. Jongdae drove for the both of them, although the seat was adjusted to Lay's height and wouldn't move because it was jammed. It ended with Jongdae sitting on Lay's lap using the wheel and Lay reaching the pedals. It was probably some sort of safety violation but Baekhyun was going to have to get Kris to come somehow, so the police would be distracted. 

"Are you sure the police won't notice?" Lay asked Jongdae. 

"Breaking news," the radio blared. "The most wanted criminal in the city- dubbed the Park Panther - has now kidnapped-"

"Yeah, pretty sure," Jongdae answered. 

They arrived at the Super Junior Spas a little while later, where Chanyeol had arrived, meeting the Xiuhan couple - obviously that did not end well. 

"WHY DO THEY HAVE FORKS AT SPAS?" 

"DIE!" 

"NEVER!" 

Lay pried Jongdae away yet again (he seemed to do that a lot nowadays), when Baekhyun arrived, dragging Kris' body on the sidewalk. "Hey guys," he chirped as sirens shrieked in the background. 

"Now all that's left is for Sehunnie to arrive!" 

"There he is!" 

"," Baekhyun swore. He threw Kris' body in the garbage can outside the spa. "You'l never get me, officer!" He screamed running away. 

"Did he get a new orange jumpsuit?" Jongdae asked. 

Chanyeol nodded. "We kind of tore up the last one."

"Okay, now that he's gone, we can start without Sehunnie," Luhan said. He skipped into the spa without the rest of them following suit. 

~

"Winning that ticket, Rose, was the best thing that ever happened to me. . . It brought me to you. And I'm thankful for that, Rose. I'm thankful," Lay sniffled. You must do me this honor, Rose. Promise me you'll survive, that you won't give up, no matter what happens, no matter how hopeless. Promise me now Rose, and hold on to that promise. 

Jongdae choked back a sob. "I promise." He squeezed Lay's hand. "I will never let go, Jack, I will never let go," he said with tears streaming down his face.

"Shut the up the water's only up to your waist," Luhan said. 

Jongdae sat up from where he was lying down on the edge of the hot tub. "Excuse me, we were having an emotional moment here."

"That. Was. So," Chanyeol said with big glossy eyes. 

"Here it comes," Minseok muttered. 

"SAAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDDD!" he screeched. 

"Chanyeol, you know that they're perfectly fine, right?" Kris told the man sobbing into his shoulder. "Aside from the fact that they're both insane." 

"IF YOU AND MINSEOK-HYUNG ARE ALLOWED TO HAVE COUPLE MOMENTS WHY AREN'T WE?"

"CAUSE YOU'RE STUPID!"

"WHAT DID YOU SAY ?" 

Kris sighed as Lay and Minseok tried to pry the two away. He looked for his phone to call Joonmyun to come pick him up. When he searched his pants on the edge of the tub he found them empty. "What the ?" he mumbled. 

"I WILL GET YOU BACK ONE DAY!"

"REVENGE!" 

", GET THE PSYCHO OFF OF ME!" 

Kris heard a familiar evil cackle before the screams of terror stopped as the criminal ran away. 

"Oh, Kris, I took your wallet and phone by the way!" he screamed as the cops chased him. 

Kris sighed. "I should have gone to law school." 

~

Short chapter but i didn't want to keep you waiting and we just came back from a road trip. shamelessly advertising my story 12 reasons why (kris-centered). it's a lot darker and more angstier than this one so go take a look if you're interested.