“Men are not afraid of things, but of how they view them.” 
― Epictetus

Atychiphobia – Fear of failure

Kim Jaejoong | JYJ

Note: Picture does not belong to me | Source

Seo Yujin’s hand was calm and steady as she lined Kim Jaejoong’s eyes with dark eyeliner. A slightly frown tugged at the corner of though, and her eyes would flit to Jaejoong’s hands that would clench and unclench, every five seconds.

Yujin had been Jaejoong’s personal make-up artist for nearly five years now and knew him well enough to call him a friend. She knew he was nervous as his hands wouldn’t stop fidgeting and she wondered why. In all the years she’d known the man, he’d never been as nervous as he was being now. It wasn’t even a live concert of MV shoot, it was just a photo shoot for a fashion magazine.

After she was done applying make-up to his face, she moved onto his hair, styling the silky brown strands into a y hairstyle. When Jaejoong continued to squirm, she couldn’t take it anymore.

“Jaejoong,” she called his name softly but Jaejoong’s eyes shot to her fast. “Is something wrong?” she spoke in the same soothing voice one would use with a scared child.

Jaejoong hesitated for a moment but finally mumbled out, “It’s nothing.”

Yujin frowned, it sure as hell wasn’t ‘nothing’ if it was making Jaejoong this anxious.

She grabbed his hands and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “You know you can tell me anything, right?” she looked into his dark brown eyes to convey her sincerity.

Jaejoong stared back silently for a moment before looking away. “It’s nothing – It’s stupid –” he muttered.

“Hey, maybe you’ll feel a little more relaxed if you share what’s bothering you so much,” Yujin began styling his hair again.

She heard Jaejoong sigh before he began talking, “It’s just that this photo shoot, its concept is ‘cute’ and…I’m just not sure whether I’m cut out for it…”

There was a brief silence in the room during which Yujin stared at Jaejoong incredulously. “You’re joking, right?” she finally sputtered out.

Jaejoong frowned and looked away, his cheeks coloring with embarrassment. “I’ve always done y concepts, or some type of dark and mysterious concept, never cute. Junsu’s the cute one! I’ve never done this before and I just –” he made a frustrated sound at the back of his throat. “I’m just scared that I’ll fail.” His voice was soft, nothing like the bold and confident Jaejoong Yujin had come to know in five years.

“Jaejoong-ah,” Yujin kneeled so she was eye-level with the man. “You have nothing to be worried about. I’ve known you for five years and never have you ever failed. It’s true that it’s the first time you are doing a ‘cute’ concept but I’m confident you can do it. You are the cutest, sweetest and dorkiest person I know. I always wonder how you manage to pull off your ‘y’ concepts because the real you, the one I know, is more cute than y. So just be yourself out there, I have full faith in you,” she gave his hand one more reassuring squeeze before ushering him out of the room.

Jaejoong walked up to the set for the photoshoot, greeting the photographer and the staff. Meanwhile Yujin waited at the back with the rest of the staff. Jaejoong caught her eye and she gave him a confident smile causing him to grin slightly.

The photoshoot took nearly three hours and at first, Jaejoong doubted his own abilities and made tiny mistakes but eventually, he was able to ease into his role and with the photographer’s guidance gave yet another successful shoot.

When they were done, Jaejoong bowed in thanks to the photographers and staff and rushed to the green room where he knew Yujin would be waiting for him.

The said woman smiled at him when he walked into the room. Jaejoong rushed to her and hugged her tight. “Thank you, so much,” he whispered into her ear.

Her tinkling laugh filled the air and she pushed him away lightly to give him a teasing look, “Told you so.”

Jaejoong laughed along. “There’s one more thing I have to be successful in,” he spoke up after a few minutes.

Yujin stopped packing her stuff and blinked at him. “What is it?”

Jaejoong smiled shyly. “It’s something I absolutely have to succeed in,” he answered vaguely.

Yujin looked at him curiously but didn’t pry as she knew it was probably none of her business.

“Do you think I should go for it?” Jaejoong asked hesitantly.

“Yeah, absolutely! Go for it!” She nodded enthusiastically.

Jaejoong nodded as well, energized. “Alright, I’ll do it right now. Thanks, Yujin,” he grinned and walked away.

Yujin watched him turn the corner and disappear from her line of sight before continuing to pack up.

Her cellphone beeped indicating a new message and Yujin picked up her phone curiously.

Yujin-ah, let’s go get coffee together ☺

Love Jaejoong

Yujin grinned at the message and replied immediately.

Jaejoong peeked out from behind a wall and watched as Yujin messed with her phone. A second later, his own beeped with a message.

Sure, I’ll be out in ten minutes.

xoxo Yujin

Jaejoong’s lips stretched into a wide smile and he pumped his fist while muttering, “Success!”

Author's Note

I was planning on just giving up on this one-shot collection since it doesn't seem all that popular, but due to the 2 new subscribers I gained, I decided to put up the chapters I'd already writted/made drafts for. Thank you to those who read and subscribed. Please do leave a comment if you enjoyed this chapter as it is very encouraging and apprecitaed :)