Final Chapter

Chapter 6 – Memorable Encounter

Thursday, 20^th March 2014, 5:30 AM, SNSD’s Room

SEOHYUN POV

We need to leave the dorm by 7 AM this morning and head toward SBS studio. I have quite a good sleep last night, there are no bags can be seen under my eyes. I am not that sleepy at all even though I woke up quite early, I think it is because I am excited to see Joon today but of course I need to focus on the performance first. Another pre-recording today but the pressure is still the same for me after the mistake that I did last week. I need to deliver a perfect performance. Despite of that, I think there is nothing wrong with putting more attention to my looks today, I mean…I don’t know what our meeting is about but when meeting a guy, a woman has to be beautiful right? Or maybe that’s not the way it works? Hmmm….

I am now in the kitchen preparing breakfast for the others. It’s only a simple breakfast menu, fruits, muesli cereal, milk and breads. I’m sure there are some unnies that won’t agree with the breakfast that I am prepared but we need to eat healthy meal to make sure that our bodies stay healthy especially in the middle of our promotion like this. Yuri unnie was sick before so I hope that there are no other members that will fall sick again since we have to travel overseas soon to perform. I heard a noise and it is Yoona unnie who woke up and when she looks at me, she makes her way toward me with her walk that almost look like a zombie walking. She looks at the dining table where I already prepared some of the meals and she quickly sit on the dining table,

Yoona: “You prepared all this? This early Seohyun?”

Seohyun: “Yes unnie, I woke up quite early and already prepared myself to leave the dorm so now that I have some spare time I thought that I can prepare breakfast for everyone.”

Yoona: “I see…thanks…but why you are already woke up and ready this early? Is it because of that guy?”

Seohyun: “Ah…no…I just happened to woke up…”

Yoona: “Haha…don’t lie to me Seohyun…you never woke up without any good reason at all…you always set your alarm especially when we have schedules on the day and you will go around everyone’s room waking everyone…it’s because of the guy is it? Hehe…you want to make sure you are on your best today, you probably put some face pack or something, hehe…”

Seohyun: “Ah unniee…stop teasing me again…I am nervous to meet him, I admit that but I thought I woke up earlier so that I can prepare breakfast and make sure that we aren’t late to the schedule by waking everyone up…”

Yoona: “Hehe…okay okay…so…have you thought about what you are going to ask to him?”

Seohyun: “Pretty much about his ‘stalking’ activity. I mean…we always recognized the people that keep appearing in airport and in the events that we are involved right? But this man…I never saw him until that day yet he still captured my pictures perfectly over the years. There must be some reason why he keep himself hidden all this time.”

Yoona: “There must be a good reason for it and I think it is interesting to see what he has to say…also…aren’t you curious as well about the gift? It seems like he is planning to give you something huge haha…”

Seohyun: “Yes I know unnie…I don’t really that excited but it makes me curious too…just what kind of gift that he is going to give me?”

Yoona: “Well…just don’t forget about what I said to you yesterday…keep this meeting between you as an idol meeting her fan, don’t do anything that makes him think that this is more than that. I trust that you are mature enough to know that in our profession, dating someone that isn’t in the same field as us isn’t that easy. Plus this guy seems to have hidden story that just makes me a little bit uncertain about him. You understand what I am trying to do here right maknae?”

Seohyun: “Yes unnie I know…thanks for reminding me about it again…I’ll remember it always.”

Yoona: “Good…now I think you should wake up the others, especially Sica unnie. I’ll finish preparing the breakfast.”

Seohyun: “Yes unnie, thank you.”

Yoona: “And Seohyun…”

Seohyun: “Yes?”

Yoona: “You know that I love you right? All these words that came out of my mouth…my nagging and everything that I did for you…you know that I love you and I was concerned about you before right? Before you told us the truth about everything? I don’t want you to see me as an unnie that only knows how to annoy you….”

Seohyun: “Of course not unnie…I know you well and I know that you are doing it because you want to help me out and ease my concerns, I am the stubborn one, refusing to be helped by you.  Thanks Yoona unnie, I love you too…and I am thankful to have all of you as my best friends…”

Yoona: “And we always proud to have you as our maknae…probably the most mature maknae in a group, hehe…”

Seohyun: “Hehe, thanks unnie…I’ll go and wake up the others…thanks for helping me preparing the breakfast…”

Yoona: “No problem…good luck with Sica unnie, I think she was staying up quite late last night…it will be a pain to wake her up…”

Seohyun: “I think regardless whether she was staying up late or night she is always hard to wake up…hehe….okay then unnie…”

I walk toward the unnies’ room and starting to wake them up one by one. Yoona unnie reminded me about the same thing twice already. I’m sure that she is just worried about me but…did she something in me that I didn’t even know myself? Do I have intention to date Joon? So far…I am not sure and as a girl I won’t lie that the fact that there is someone that is so dedicated toward me is a bit touching my heart. I know that some of my other fans might did the same thing as him but…there is this weird feeling that keep telling me that he is different. I don’t know whether he is different in a good way or in a bad way…but I just feel that he is different from the others. Sigh…I’m not really sure…my real experience with men only come during the shooting of WGM with Yonghwa oppa. I don’t have any intention to date just yet until this time and certainly the idea of dating a fan which is a total stranger to me seems so crazy and absurd but….crazy and absurd seem to be the words that are related to my actions in the past week......ah never mind. I should wake the unnies up and get ready to leave the dorm. Let’s just see how the meeting with him goes…then I will figure out what to do later. I can ask the other unnies too that have dated before to get some advice, I’m sure they can help me.

SBS Studio, 8:30 AM

AUTHOR POV

SNSD is on their way toward the stage to do their rehearsal. All members are already finished with their hair and make-up but they are still using their casual clothes on during the rehearsal. They are going to change to their outfit after this to do the camera rehearsal but at the moment it is still fun and relaxing rehearsal stage at the moment with no fans cheering at them. All the members including Seohyun are focused on the rehearsal and some of them of course not using all of their energy, just making sure the sound is okay and the rehearsal go through smoothly. After the rehearsal ends, Seohyun grabs a bottle of water and just right then she spots some of the fans entering the studio. She doesn’t know that they are supposed to be here this early before their camera rehearsal. Seohyun quickly goes toward the backstage and she grabs Tiffany’s wrist and ask her to see the incoming fans,

Seohyun: “Unnie…aren’t the fans here too early? Usually they come after we finished our camera rehearsal right?”

Tiffany: “Why maknae? You’re nervous because of that guy? Hehehehe….”

Seohyun: “Yes unnie…to be honest with you…but don’t tell the others okay? I don’t want them to worry about me…”

Tiffany: “As long as you perform well like in the rehearsal and like in yesterday’s performance, we don’t mind how nervous you are…”

Seohyun: “Don’t worry unnie…is it normal? I mean…what do you feel when you are performing knowing that Nichkhun oppa is watching you?”

Tiffany: “Well, it is slightly different before and after we are dating. I think after we are dating, I would be more nervous when I will be performing in an event where he will be watching me backstage. But…why are you asking me this maknae? Hmm? Did I smell a love in blossom here with a total stranger? Hmm?”

Seohyun: “It’s not like that unnie…I’m just curious that’s all…”

Tiffany: “Well…I’m sure someone must have told you this but you better keep your distance with him. Dating…it supposed to be a blessing…something that we can really enjoy…but seeing our status as idols…it is hard to enjoy it fully. It is already hard for the three of us that date with other celebrities…unless you can keep it really well like Hyoyeon I suggest you think twice about dating now. There are so many uncertain factors….I don’t think you should risk it.”

Seohyun: “I know it well unnie…but…I’ve been having these weird feelings toward him since he saved me that day. Before I was kind of a bit angry and upset toward him because his actions were so confusing to me but when he saved me that day, I really warmed up to him and it is weird talking about this when I never even see and talk to him in person just yet. But you get what I’m trying to say right unnie?”

Tiffany: “Of course I know…it is normal…he saved you from a very dangerous situation that can almost ruin your life, it is normal for you to see him in a different way or having feelings toward him. I just want you to control those feelings and just treat it like he is your guardian angel, no more than that. I know it might sound so rude but I think it is for the good of you both….”

Seohyun: “Mmm….okay unnie…thanks for your advice…I think after talking to you and Yoona unnie I have a really clear mind about approaching this. I won’t have any kind of feelings toward him, I’m just going to thank him and talk to him like an idol talking to her fans….I will be grateful toward him but I will not cling to that incident anymore…he saved me, I thanked him, end of story….right unnie?”

Tiffany: “Yeah…it might sound like you are treating him harsh here but you are just doing the right thing so both of you can go on with your own lives like usual. We also have a lot of activities for the rest of the year, if you started dating now I am afraid that it will be hard on you to concentrate fully. Remember that our Japan Tour is not too far away now and we have a lot of performances to do and it will both physically and mentally draining for us…we need to stay focused and stay healthy for the time being okay maknae?”

Seohyun: “Yes unnie of course I understand, thank you for the advice….I am really thankful to have you all as my unnies in the group. You all really take care of me when I need it the most…thank you.”

Tiffany: “Your welcome our cute maknae…so can we eat junk food regularly now?”

Seohyun: “But unnie, if you keep eating junk food then you will….”

Tiffany: “Aish! Stop stop! Don’t say it again…hahaha….I’m just joking with you maknae…come on let’s change our clothes and get into our outfit, the others must have been waiting for us already.”

Seohyun: “Hehe, okay unnie…what’s the outfit for today? Is it suits again or something more feminine?”

Tiffany: “Today’s outfit…..”

So both Tiffany and Seohyun continue their conversation on their way back to the dressing room. Now that Seohyun has talked to both Yoona and Tiffany, she is even more convinced that she shouldn’t have any feelings toward him now. As much as she is confused right now with her own feelings and thoughts toward him but she knows for certain that dating is not going to work for both of them and she will not even consider it again. With a calmer mind, she just hopes that everything will be okay for today.

10:30 AM

SNSD finished with their preparation and already did a camera rehearsal as well. Now everyone is preparing to go to the stage. The girls are rocking a black outfit with a gold tie and even though the outfit is a bit masculine today, all 9 of them are still looking pretty as usual and all of them are focused on the performance .As soon as they step out onto the stage, they are welcomed with the loud roar of cheers from the SONEs that have been waiting for them for more than an hour to perform. Before then went on to the stage, both Yoona and Tiffany already volunteer themselves to help finding Joon and Haeri among the crowd so that Seohyun can stay focus on her lines and dance steps.  The two girls put on their eagle eyes to search for these two individuals and after a thorough searching and occasional greeting to the fans so that it is not that obvious that they are searching the crowd, they only found one person amongst the crowd. They quickly go back to the group and report their finding to Seohyun,

Tiffany: “We found someone…”

Yoona: “But I think you’re going to be disappointed…”

Seohyun: “Why?”

Yoona: “It’s Haeri unnie…I didn’t see Joon with him….”

Tiffany: “Probably he is already backstage by this time so you never know…”

Yoona: “But Fany unnie….Haeri unnie is wearing the pass…”

Tiffany: “Ow…I see….”

Seohyun: “That means Joon isn’t here? He ran away again? I don’t understand him at all…”

Tiffany: “He must have a reason and I think you can ask Haeri unnie after the performance, I’m sure she will give you an explanation…remember….you promised us that you won’t let this affect your performance again…so don’t mess it up because of this…”

Yoona: “Don’t worry maknae…we will accompany you talking to her backstage later on…now you see the other fans that are cheering for us right there? You have to do your part as SNSD members to make sure that they are happy to see us performing…so wipe that worried look on your face and perform to your best…”

Seohyun: “Yes unnie…I will….but promise me that you two will accompany me later on? To see Haeri unnie I mean…”

Tiffany: “Of course maknae….”

Yoona: “We promise…and you can ask the other unnie as well if you want to…we will always be there for you.”

Seohyun: “Thank you…I promise you two that I will not mess up my performance today…I will give it my best!”

Tiffany: “That’s the Seohyun that I know…come on let’s get back to the others…”

Yoona: “Come on maknae…”

Seohyun: “Yes unnie….”

Even she has a really slight concern about it she doesn’t really put too much care into it right now. So the performance finally begins and as promised Seohyun is giving it her best. Haeri is amongst the crowd cheering the girls loudly just like another fan girl of SNSD. Seohyun keep her focused up until the end of the performance where they finish the recording in one take much to her relief. Finally all the girls are going backstage, Seohyun, Tiffany and Yoona quickly change their clothes and they are quickly wandering around the hallway looking for Haeri. The others will stay on the studio for a while waiting out their next schedule while talking to the other performers backstage. After searching around the backstage area and get sidetracked for a while after conversations with some of the other artists backstage they finally found Haeri sitting on a chair in one of the hallway. They quickly grab her and find an empty room nearby and have a conversation inside the room,

Haeri: “Awesome performance from you all! I’m glad that you didn’t make any mistake today, Seohyun…”

Seohyun: “Ah thank you unnie…sorry if I am too direct but….”

Yoona: “She wants to ask you about Joon….”

Tiffany: “Where is he?”

Haeri: “He….is somewhere else…I’m sure he wants me to apologize for him because he has to absent today but…I think it is time…this game of cat and mouse will end now, any of you got schedule after this?”

Tiffany: “I will have to do a photo shoot for a cosmetic brand but Yoona and I think Taeyeon is also free…why unnie?”

Haeri: “Well…I want to ask Seohyun to go with me to see Joon…but it might be hard because you all are celebrities and you have schedules….”

Yoona: “Oh that’s okay…Seohyun’s mom is actually going to pick her up from the studio today…why don’t unnie go with us too? Seohyun can ask her mother to drop us off to see Joon and we can tell her that we are going to see a friend…we can blend ourselves with the public so don’t worry.”

Tiffany: “Yes…I won’t be able to come but Yoona and maybe Taeyeon also can go with you maknae…”

Seohyun: “Umm…okay…but unnie…where is Joon right now?”

Haeri: “Seoul National University Hospital….”

Tiffany: “Oh my….”

Yoona: “Did something happen to him on his way here?”

Seohyun: “What is wrong with Joon unnie?”

Haeri: “I think it is best if you come with me and I think he will explain it to you himself. He might hate me for this but I don’t see the purpose of hiding things from you anymore. It doesn’t matter whether you know about it or not…so…how soon can we go?”

Tiffany: “Do you want me to go and get Taeyeon, maknae?”

Seohyun: “I’ll go back to the waiting room too…I need to grab my stuffs and tell the manager that my mom is coming…but about Haeri unnie…”

Yoona: “You said to our manager that she is your mother best friend’s daughter right? Since your mother will pick you up, I think we can ask her to go with us to the waiting room too and we can go out together. I’ll go and ask Taeyeon unnie to come with us as well; you just call your mother to tell her that we need her to drop us somewhere else…”

Seohyun: “Yes unnie, let’s do that….”

Tiffany: “Don’t forget that you need to be back in the dorm by 3 PM because we have the Baby-G event tonight….don’t make our managers suspicious at you…”

Seohyun: “Yes unnie, I’ll make sure that all of us will get back to the dorm by 3 PM.”

Tiffany: “Good, Haeri unnie will you come with us to the waiting room? These girls are going to get their stuffs and I will ask Taeyeon unnie to come with you all.”

Haeri: “Ah…okay…you sure this is okay? I can wait in the hallway if you want to…”

Tiffany: “Aish, don’t be like that…come on…come with us, it’s perfectly fine…”

Haeri: “Ah okay Tiffany, thank you…”

So Haeri is following Tiffany, Yoona and Seohyun back to the waiting room as they grab their bags and also ask Taeyeon to come with them. Their managers aren’t really suspicious since Seohyun’s mother is picking them up from the broadcasting station. Once they are in Seohyun’s mother car, Haeri quickly disguise herself of course as Taeyeon’s friend because if she said to her that she is Seohyun’s friend then her mother would be suspicious of her. They told Seohyun’s mother that Taeyeon’s friend is admitted to the hospital and they want to visit the friend. Seohyun’s mother just agreed with them without asking too much and she will be back to pick them up in two hours. Once they are arrived at the hospital, Seohyun is getting even more nervous. Not only that Joon isn’t expecting her to come to the hospital to see him but she is worried to find out just what happened to him that cause him to get admitted to the hospital.

They ride the elevator up the floor where his room is at and while walking in the hallway, Taeyeon is talking with Haeri so Seohyun quickly whisper to Yoona,

Seohyun: “What to do unnie? He isn’t expecting me to be here…I’m afraid that he will be upset when he sees me….”

Yoona: “What are you talking about? He is sick and you come in to visit him, I’m sure that he will be overjoyed with happiness and excitement, don’t worry Seohyun…”

Seohyun: “Are you sure unnie?”

Yoona: “Of course I am sure…don’t worry…everything will be just fine, just calm yourself down and try not to think too much…you faced a lot of moments that are far more nerve wrecking than this, you’ll be fine.”

Seohyun: “Okay unnie…”

Yoona: “We’ll be there with you in the room, so you don’t have to worry about a thing…you are strong Seohyun…remember your first meeting during the shooting of WGM with Yonghwa oppa? You meet all 4 of CN Blue members all by yourself and even though it’s awkward you manage to do it all by yourself…now that you have me and Taeyeon unnie, you have nothing to be nervous about…okay?”

Seohyun: “Yes unnie thanks….”

They continue walking toward the room and as soon as they reach to the front of the room, Haeri go inside first because the doctors are currently inside his room checking on his condition. The three SNSD members wait outside the room, sitting down on the seats in the hallway. After waiting for around 10 minutes, the doctor and the nurse is finally walking out of the room and Haeri pops up on the door asking them to come inside,

Haeri: “The doctor is finished, come on in….”

Seohyun: “Have unnie told him that we are here outside?”

Haeri: “Yes, he was a bit pissed at me but in the end he doesn’t mind it because he really wants to see you…come on girls….”

Seohyun: “Ah okay then….”

Seohyun is a bit hesitating, she lets Yoona and Taeyeon come inside the room first and as soon as they come in, she can hear a conversation straight away. Joon is quite excited to see the two SNSD unnies visiting him and she is getting nervous, wondering whether she will get the same reaction as Taeyeon and Yoona. She gathers up her courage and finally walks inside the room and there he is. He is sitting up on the bed with a bandage wrapped around his head. He is smiling and looked really happy when he is talking with Taeyeon and Yoona but as soon as Seohyun comes in, he quickly stares at her and it seems that he is in awe that Seohyun is in the same room as him. He is really flustered and a bit blushing as Seohyun walks closer to him. To describe Joon’s appearance, he is a bit tall and his body is really slim, his face and body is probably similar to the singer Jung Joon-young but the difference is that he is wearing eyeglasses all the time.

The two of them share an awkward smile when they see each other; both Taeyeon and Yoona are trying to hold in their laughter seeing how nervous and clumsy Seohyun is right now in front of Joon. Yoona quickly try to ease their nervousness by talking to Seohyun,

Yoona: “Come on maknae, stand here beside us and introduce yourself to him, it’s impolite to just stand there like that.”

Seohyun: “Ah yes unnie…”

She walks slowly closer to the bed and after standing right beside Yoona, she froze again and the situation starting to get awkward again but just right then Joon extend his hand toward her and he has a warm smile on his face,

Joon: “It’s....it’s great to finally see you in person…I’m Joon…the writer of that letter and the one that sent you the photo album….nice to meet you….”

Seohyun: “Ah yes…I am Seohyun, SNSD’s maknae. Thank you very much for all of the support that you gave me all this time. I am really thankful.”

The two shakes their hands and Seohyun becomes even more shy after shaking his hand as she just stares down into the floor and not saying anything. Joon clears his throat and he starts talking to avoid any more awkward situation,

Joon: “Haeri noona….can you do me a favor?”

Haeri: “Yes?”

Joon: “Sorry if I sound a bit rude to you…but….is it okay if you leave the room for a while? I want to speak to these three SNSD noona alone if that is okay. It is just nerve wrecking to think that you are going to listen to it…sorry noona….”

Haeri: “Sigh…always the shy boy Joon. Very well, I will go and get myself something to eat, I’ll be back in half an hour, use your time well Joon. Sorry girls, since he asked like that I have no choice but to leave the three of you with him in here without me. Don’t worry, he won’t bite…hehe…bye everyone.”

Seohyun: “Ah bye unnie.”

Taeyeon & Yoona: “Bye unnie…”

After Haeri leaves the room, all eyes are on Joon right now and he clearly feel slightly intimidated just thinking that the three SNSD members have all of their attention on him right now, it is a bit overwhelming,

Joon: “Wow…it is a bit nervous when the three of you are staring at me like that…hehe…”

Taeyeon: “Hey take it easy Joon…we’re not going to ask you silly questions or whatnot…just talk to us comfortably…”

Yoona: “We’re just here for maknae…we’re not trying to intimidate you or anything.”

Taeyeon: “Or maybe you want the two of us to leave too so that you can talk with maknae alone?”

Joon: “Ah no no…that’s fine…I guess it is much better that you two are here as well. At least it might not make things awkward…now…I will explain everything, including why I am not there at the broadcasting station today after begging my noona to ask you for the backstage pass. I’m sure you have a lot of questions for me….I have my questions too for you but I think it is better for you to ask me first...”

Seohyun: “Ah…where do I start…hmm….mmm…..”

Yoona: “Why you always look at her from far away?”

Taeyeon: “Yes…maknae mentioned to us that she doesn’t remember seeing you in one of her fan signing event where you come up to the stage and ask for the signatures personally….she wonders why….”

Seohyun: “Ah yes right…I am quite curious about it…I wonder whether it is okay for you to tell us all about it….if you don’t mind….”

Joon: “Ah well…of course I don’t mind…it’s just that it will be a very long story and I think the three of you should grab the chairs over there and sit by the bedside,  it is burdening to see the three of you standing like that listening to my long fairy tale.”

Seohyun: “Okay then…”

The three of them grab the chairs and after sitting comfortably, they are waiting for Joon to begin his story. He seems to be gathering his thoughts and then he clear his throat, drink the water from the glass before he finally begins with his story. It seems that he is awfully nervous about telling them about it,

Joon: “So…this is…probably best suited to be called as the story of my life…it will be a long one…but…I will tell you everything about it…and why I have come to like SNSD…why I become Seohyun’s fan and why I always avoid her all this time….”

Yoona: “This is interesting…you are a total stranger to me but somehow I think that your story will be interesting…I just have that feeling…”

Taeyeon: “Umm…how old are you now anyway? I forget…”

Joon: “I’m 21 years old and going to turn 22 years old this year noona…”

Taeyeon: “You are so young yet it seems that you hold a mysterious story behind your young life…go on then…we’ll going to hear you out…right maknae?”

Seohyun: “Yes of course….please start Joon….”

Joon: “So….when you were debuted with Into the New World, I was still 15 years old by then…I’m still at a young age where I should have enjoying being a young teenager, playing with my friends, getting ready for puberty and worried about homework and exams….but….that is not how I spent my school days…even though everyone around me spent a very normal childhood and school life…not for me…..something…changed my life…it changed my life so much that when I was small, I don’t really know how to handle it…I was so lost…I…I don’t know who to ask…even Haeri noona who tried to be strong for my sake and keep reminding me about what is right and what is wrong…I ignored her all the time….to think that she is so attentive of me  right now after what I did toward her….it hurts….”

Seohyun: “But what about your parents? Aren’t they supposed to guide you? Did you ignore them as well?”

Joon: “My…parents…weren’t there for me….I can’t ask them for help….”

Yoona: “Why they weren’t there for you? Did they work overseas or something?”

Joon: “I….I….Sigh….my parents used to fight a lot….it is all because of me….”

Taeyeon: “What do you mean it is because of you?”

Joon: “I…wasn’t welcomed by my father into this world…I was born because of an accident….I am an unwanted child that my father despised so much……”

Seohyun: “Oh my God…..”

Joon: “Yeah….Haeri noona and my mother always loved me even though at that time our family really having a bad time financially and my appearance into the world only worsened the family’s financial situation…my father used to work two jobs just to cover the expense of my family and Haeri noona’s school fees…I was so small at that time that I never realized that my parents fought a lot because of me….when I grow up, every time I made a mistake…my father always hits me…he hit me so hard that even until now I never forget the pain that I felt….it…was rough….”

Taeyeon: “That….is so horrible……”

Joon: “Yeah…so that is pretty much childhood days…even when I enter elementary school, I tried to earn some money too by helping up in my aunt’s noodle shop but it doesn’t impress him at all…he even becoming more mad at me because he thought that I was underestimating him that he is unable to earn money for the family that cause me to do part time work to help…everything that I did back then…no matter whether how right it is…it will makes him even more hateful toward me…to the point where he is starting to lose his respect as a father in my eyes. But…that is not the worst thing that he did…”

Yoona: “Did he hit your mom and noona as well?”

Joon: “No…he always fought with my mom all the time but he never laid his hands on them…I was the only victim of his physical abuse in the family. But I remember that day…I was 11 years old and it is on my first day on my Junior High School. Something terrible happened that day. My mother wanted to celebrate my entrance to the school because I passed elementary school with good grades, strange enough, my father who hated me so much agree to go on a dinner with all of us. I thought that he is warming up to me…but…I guess I am guessing wrong…during our celebratory dinner, my father drank a lot of alcohol that he ends up fighting with the other guests at the restaurant, it is so embarrassing that my mother quickly pay for the dinner and drag him away from the restaurant immediately. On the way back into our car, we were really struggling just to keep him standing up and my father starting to be mean toward me again and he is even meaner when he is drunk. He slap me, kick me and pushed me all around up to the point where my mother can’t take it anymore…they fought on the street that night…because of me….my  mother tried to defend me from my father’s abuse…and….that is when my life is turned upside down. My father usually never laid his hands on my mother no matter how angry he is but that night, he pushes my mother, we were standing on the side of the street…and….my…. (tears start to come out) my mother…whom I loved so much…I saw her body flew into the air as my father pushed him toward a car that fail to stop to prevent any damage. My mother’s body just lying down on the street, full of blood and when Haeri noona and I run up to her, she holds both of our hands and the last thing I hear from her was, ‘Don’t be angry at your father…he was just confused…I’m sure that he love both of you equally….I am so proud of you two…especially you, Joon…congratulation for entering Junior High School…forgive me…I love you’”

Joon stop the story as he tries to control his emotion and hold in his tears. The three SNSD members cried too hearing the sad story of his childhood and about Joon’s mother. Joon managed to hold his tears and after wiping his eyes, he continue his story again,

Joon: “So…that moment…as much as my mom tried to tell me not to hate my father…her words only made me hate him even more, especially when both Haeri noona and I saw him running away from the scene of the crime and that day…was the last day that we ever saw our father. Haeri noona is way older than I am…she is able to handle the situation much better and because she is now the head of the family, she is trying to be strong for the sake of both of us. We both moved out of our old house and after selling it to another family member, Haeri noona rented a small apartment just enough for the two of us and at that time, she continues her study while working part time jobs at night. But I on the other hand, unable to cope with my mom’s death just like that. The hatred toward my father grows even more and then I met the wrong friend at my new school…my life…has changed for the worse. I started to smoke, I pull pranks on the girls at my school, and I tortured students who refused to help me with my school works. Before long, I was known as the trouble maker in our school and even my teacher is afraid of me. Haeri noona tried to warn me and every time at our home she always threw away the pack of cigarettes that I brought home. I fought with her a lot at that time and I can hear that she always cried at her room whenever we fought…I feel bad toward her but I never listened to her. Years go by and as much as the school teachers hated me for my behavior, I keep getting good marks on my subjects and I graduated from the Junior High School.”

Seohyun: “That must be during our debut days right?”

Joon: “Yes noona…I was staring my high school life when the 9 of you debuted and all 9 of you really helped me to get rid of my bad behavior and I reduced my smoking frequency. I started to attend your events, I watched your show, Girls Go to School and I really like that show at that time. Me and some of my friends are the first people to join your fan club and my life seems to get better…until…someone showed up…and damn right he ruined my life for the second time already…but this time…it is all my fault.”

Seohyun: “What happened? Who showed up? Is it….your father?”

Joon: “Yes….you are right…I think that day you were recording for a variety show that I couldn’t really remember so as usual, me and my friends grab our camera and we are about to take some pictures of you but before I leave my apartment, someone is at the front door and it is my father. I sent my friends first to the shooting location because I don’t want them to know that it is my father who comes to my apartment at that time. He talked a lot of things, begging for forgiveness and everything, saying how he missed me and Haeri noona so much. I was actually starting to pity him but he has to ruin it. In the end, he wanted me to stop going to school and all the money that is supposed to be used to pay my school fees to be given to him….and the reason for doing that is because that he owed a lot of people a huge sum of money and he keep gambling all the money he has, thinking that if he won, he can pay back his loans…but he lost…he lost everything and if he doesn’t pay…something bad will happen to him. Of course because I still harbor a hateful feeling toward him, I didn’t really care about what will happen to him but he mentioned about Haeri noona…he told me that he will sold Haeri noona to a ion ring if I didn’t give him the money that he seek. Hearing that enraged me…and…I snapped…all those years of hate toward him…I unleashed it in a horrible way. I punch him, I kick him, I beat him up senselessly and without I realize, I am holding an ashtray on my hands, full of blood and my father is lying down on the floor, He almost die and I think he suffered a lot of serious injuries. I…I don’t want to be like my father…so I decided to hand myself to the police and I was sentenced into jail…”

Seohyun: “Oh God….that…that….I don’t know what to say….I….I…….”

Yoona: “What happened to your father after that?”

Joon: “Well…I never seen him again until today but the last time I heard, he lost one function of his legs and he lost an eye because of me. He suffered internal bleeding and he is confined to hospital bed for several months. The last time I heard that he is working hard to pay off his loans but it is hard with his body condition like that…I felt guilty….but at the same time…I don’t want him to go anywhere near me or my noona again….”

Seohyun: “Oh God…Joon….I…I…”

Joon: “That’s okay…all three of you are right to hate me so much….I am almost becoming a murderer…”

Taeyeon: “Even so….you are driven by your hate…by your overflowing emotion that you cannot control. I am not saying that you are right…assaulting your father like that no matter what the reason is…it is horrible and wrong….but there is something driving you to do it…and it is something that you cannot control….I don’t hate or despise you…but I pity you a lot….it must really been hard….”

Joon: “Yes…but still….it doesn’t make me feel slightly better knowing that I have a reason to do it or not….so….inside the jail, I have a lot of time to reflect on myself. I thought I was going back to be the horrible person that I was before but it seems that fate is trying to give me a second chance in life to correct my past mistakes. One of the police officers seen my talent in photography and this person is actually a friend of my father and he knew about how my father treated me when I was still a child. He tried to negotiate with the court and he managed to get me released early on the condition that both Haeri noona and I will be under his supervision all the time. He became my legal guardian and asking me to work in one of the private investigation office. I started to work as photographer for the private investigator but at that time I still feeling something is missing in my life until that day…I mentioned it before on one of my letter to Seohyun noona that I watched the episode of ‘Chocolate’ where Seohyun noona’s mom was the guest of the show. When I learned about Tiffany’s unnie mother…it….it gives me strength. Seeing how she is cheerful in front of everyone and keep working hard as a member of SNSD…I thought that I should do the same…I…will not fall anymore into a sense of obscurity, I will let not let the guilt of assaulting my father and the feeling of sadness that come from losing my mother be the chain that hold me from continuing my life and create my own path for the future. So I continue my school and still working part time as the photographer. I also starting to become your fans….I am more attracted to the 9 of you even more than before…but of course…”

Taeyeon: “There is only one person that caught the attention of your eyes….”

Yoona: “Why maknae?”

Seohyun: “……………………………………………………….”

Joon: “Because….I’m sorry to say this in front of you Taeyeon and Yoona noona. All 9 of you have unique characteristics and behavior but the one that really caught my eye was Seohyun at that time…why? Because…She is a person with principle, a person that keep going forward and stay in her own path no matter how many people around her try to shake her and bend her from her path, she will keep looking forward and finish what she has to do with the belief that she has in herself about her principle, about her way of thinking. A lot of people might see is as stubborn and she is hard to be reasoned with…but I found that…charming and fascinating…I…was a boy that is lost in the way…when seeing someone becoming a celebrity but she always true to herself and practiced what her parents taught her…it…it hits me…I want to become a stronger person…I don’t care whether people around me might think of me as someone that had been to prison, a boy that almost murdered his father…an orphan that is born to cause trouble for the family….I don’t care anymore. I am Joon…I was given a second chance in life and I am taking it step by step and I will fix my life and make sure that Haeri noona can live a happy life…I want to pay back all of her kindness all this time….for her patience and her love for me….I want to give her the happy life that she deserve as a little brother that has been making her life hard since I was a small kid….luckily…she become your fans as well and it made us talk to each other a lot more and we are fixing our relationship slowly as our love toward SNSD grows….that is why…Seohyun…and the other SNSD’s members presence in my life is something that I am really grateful…your songs…your aegyo…your dorkiness…your smile….everything about you…gives me more strength every day to live my life and becoming a better person. Thank you Seohyun noona….and of course to you too Yoona and Taeyeon noona…I owe you everything….”

Seohyun was already crying and she was crying even more when she heard that this man…is able to find the correct path in his life because of her. She feels grateful….she feels appreciated but at the same time, it saddened him that Joon have to live with a huge burden in his life and it makes her sad that she used to hate a lot of things about her life as an idol where someone like Joon is inspired to makes his life a better one because of her presence as a SNSD member. Yoona and Taeyeon both try to calm her down and Joon starts crying as well seeing Seohyun like that. After they manage to calm themselves down, Seohyun still curious about something,

Seohyun: “I…I am really thankful that my presence in your life was helping you to be a better person. I am glad that I can inspire people like that and I will strive to become a better person both as Seo Joo-hyun and as Seohyun of SNSD. I hope that you will have a bright future Joon. Thank you…..but….tell me something…now that I understand about your life….why you always avoid me like that and never showed up in fan meetings or fan signing events? I also noticed that all the photos that you took of me are from the events here in Korea…I am just curious about it…”

Joon: “Ah that…..has something to do with my absence in the studio today. Because of…my smoking habit….after I graduated from high school, I was going to enlist to the military at the time because I am not sure whether I will continue on with my education to the university or not….during the health check-up….I was diagnosed….with lung cancer….”

Taeyeon, Yoona & Seohyun: “WHAT?”

Joon: “Yes….because of the cancer…I was admitted to a lot of treatment and also when I was released from jail, I was wearing an electronic ankle bracelet because I was still supervised by the authority. Adding that and my disease…It is impossible for me to attend your events overseas…and why I was avoiding you? Because at that time I was so paranoid that if I meet the 9 of you in person…you might get contracted to my disease as well. The doctor told me that it is impossible, still I was paranoid and I don’t want to cause you to suffer because of me…that is why I never showed up…until that day during the filming of Guerilla Date.”

Seohyun: “Why you showed up that day? Is something happened that day?”

Joon: “Yes…that is the day…when my electronic ankle bracelet was removed and I was declared a free man by the authority. The day before that, I finished my treatment for my cancer…but the real reason why I started to show up that day, regardless of the treatment and the electronic bracelet…is because I don’t really have much time to be honest…I thought I have to see you from up close…not hiding behind the crowd snapping away at pictures…but my fear got the better of me and as soon as you approach me that day…I cowered in nervousness and fear and I ran away…sorry noona…”

Seohyun: “But what are you saying about….not having much time…don’t tell me that….”

Yoona: “The cancer isn’t cured yet? Please don’t tell me that you are dying….”

Taeyeon: “Oh my God…this is so awful…I’m sorry Joon….”

Joon: “Oh yes…I actually only have a day left and tomorrow I might not make it….”

Seohyun, Yoona & Taeyeon: “WHAT?”

Joon: “Okay noona…I think I am having fun by myself here…I am not terminally ill nor that I am dying…I was just joking just now…hehe…”

Taeyeon: “Wow…your sense of humor….”

Yoona: “Lame….and seriously not funny….”

Seohyun: “Aigoo…I was really worried…”

Joon: “Hehe…sorry…but that wasn’t what I meant about running out of time. The treatment is finished but I am not sure that I can be declared as a healthy man once again. There are a lot of side effects along with the treatment and this is what happened to me today. I forgot to take some of my pills to increase my blood level and I think it is because it has been several days since I forgot to take the pill, I become weak and on the way to the studio, my legs just lose its strength and my head got wounded as it hit the steps at the train station.”

Seohyun: “Ah so that is why you have bandage there on your head…that explains it….”

Joon: “Yes…so…for the past 3 years, both me and especially my noona have been working hard to earn enough money to send me overseas to get another check-up and possibly another set of treatments to make sure that the cancer hasn’t spread to any other part of my body…so recently, my auntie that run the noodle shop that I told you before in my story is really successful now and she agreed to help me with some of the funding in exchange that…both me and Haeri noona will live at her house once my treatment is finished and because she and my uncle don’t have kids, they want to adopt us as their kids….at first I am against this because I can’t imagine having another parents…but…I guess my mom would want me to be happy and have my own family too…having someone to go home too aside from my noona…I guess she would want that. So I accept her offer and….tomorrow I’ll be leaving Korea to go to Singapore first to get checked up because my aunt knows a doctor in there before then leaving for the United States to get my treatment…”

Seohyun: “Oh wow…so you’ll be going away for a long time then…..that means…well…no more pictures of me I guess for a while captured in your camera…hehe….”

Joon: “Well…probably not for a while noona…probably it will be years until I can attend events again and take pictures again of you like I used to…that’s if you are still active as a singer and celebrity….”

Seohyun: “What do you mean?”

Joon: “Well… when I was a kid…I never dreamed of becoming a photographer, I never even holds a camera until I was around 9 years old I think. I used to dream of becoming a football player. I always watch football matches when I was a kid…and I played football when I was in Junior High despite of my attitude problem. I’m not saying that I am talented, but…after my treatment finished, I want to try applying for a try out in one of the K-League clubs. That police officer that become my legal guardian, he has some connection to the football scouts for some K-League clubs. Well...this will only happen if I can get my health back and my body is on full fitness. It might take some time and a lot of effort but I guess the three of you know just how much you need to go through in order to debut. How much effort you put into each practice…the travelling from your house during your trainee days…it wasn’t an easy time but all of you were doing it for the sole purpose of debuting right? Well…I am now 21 years old turning 22 and I don’t know how old I will be when I finish the treatment….I am considered as a really old rookie in a football world but I won’t let that shoot down my determination…I will…make sure that I reach my dream, the same way that all 9 SNSD members reach theirs…and I will enjoy my life and not letting my past mistakes burdening me again.”

Taeyeon: “See…I know that you have such an interesting story…sigh…it gives me tears…remembering back to my trainee days…”

Yoona: “Yes…hearing your story really thinking back at those years…”

Seohyun: “I think...what you are trying to achieve is really great Joon. I’m sorry…you talked so much about you I think it is my turn too to explain a few things to you. When the first time I saw you during Guerilla Date filming, I have to admit that you really caught the attention of my eyes…because that day among the lively crowd, you were the only one that stare at me and your stare was really sharp that I still remember it until this day.”

Joon: “Sorry noona…I was really nervous and hesitating at that time that I might stare at you rudely that day, I’m sorry….”

Seohyun: “That’s okay…Back then I was actually a bit upset with you because I am about to walk toward you and try to greet you but then you just turn your back on me like that….but hearing your explanation today I think I can understand your situation at that time. Then…after that…comes the fan signing event where you threw a rock to that oppa that bothered me…I am so confused at that time but seeing how awful that oppa is, I guess I need to thank you for what you did for me back then. That day Haeri unnie come and gave me that photo album of yours…I can understand the photo album but not the phone case….”

Joon: “Oh I didn’t explain it to you on the audio message?”

Seohyun: “Not that I remember Joon….”

Joon: “I see…so that phone case…there is a little story behind it. I think it is around your Hoot promotion? I am not so sure. I thought about seeing your performance for one last time before I enlist to the military, so I bought that phone case that I think should fit your old mobile phone. I am not entirely sure when I can give it to you, but I know there should be a fan signing event before my enlistment date…but then of course I can’t enlist to the military due to my health and I developed a paranoia where I never attend your performance or events again…so that phone case supposed to be my gift for you at that time but I never got the chance to give it to you…”

Seohyun: “Ah I see….I think…it has a sentimental value behind it because you discovered about your disease at that time. Thanks Joon…for the phone case…the letter…the message…the album…and most importantly…for your support as a fan….thank you…it is a great honor to think that someone is inspired because of what I have been doing….I am thankful to be able to help you…even though I never really realized it all this time…but my meeting with you today…it really opened my eyes….there are a lot of people out there that are struggling with their lives…and perhaps…we as SNSD can be the source of their energy and inspiration to overcome the problem in their lives. I always heard stories about it so many times but to listen to someone that actually inspired by us personally…it moves my heart and it makes me really want to strive more as a SNSD members to show everyone our very best….thank you Joon…some of the members branded you as my stalker…”

Joon: “Ah well…judging from the amount of pictures that I took of you…it makes sense for you to call me a stalker…”

Seohyun: “Yes…but for me….you are not a stalker that ruin my life….but instead…you are my beautiful stalker….thank you Joon…thank you….”

She gets up from her seat and goes over toward him and she gives him a hug. It surprises not only Joon but also to Taeyeon and Yoona as well to see her so bold like that to someone that she just met today. After their hug, thing is a little bit awkward for a moment but then Yoona quickly propose to take pictures together and also for Joon to take a picture with Seohyun only. They take quite a lot of pictures and Taeyeon joked around that he can brag to his friends that he is taking a lot of pictures with SNSD on his phone. Time flies quite fast and it has been more than an hour since they start talking. Haeri is actually finished having her meal but she waits outside playing with her phone because she knows that Joon wants her not to hear what he is going to say to the SNSD members. Seohyun’s mother comes by to pick them up earlier than expected and she is already on her way to the hospital. It is time to say their goodbyes then after both Taeyeon and Yoona give him a hug too; it is time for Joon and Seohyun to say their goodbyes,

Joon: “Thank you noona…for coming all the way here and meeting me like this…and for being a good listener to my story…I am really thankful for this opportunity meeting you personally. I will never forget our meeting today…I will remember it always as I go through my days in reaching my dream…”

Seohyun: “Thank you also to you Joon…even though I never underestimate the strength and the support of our fans….what I heard from you today is more than enough to know that we are able to giving back to our fans and inspiring them to become a better person. That alone is enough for me to continue on this path that I am taking right now and I will keep improving myself to become a better person as well and hopefully there will be others as well just like you to get inspired in changing their lives for a better one because they are inspired by what we say or what we do….thank you Joon…”

Joon: “It is alright noona…I will keep watching you closely…even though I might be far away and not in Korea…the social media will help me keeping up with all of the updates of Seohyun noona and about SNSD as a group as well. I am planning to create a photo book with all the pictures that I took and maybe start selling it and the money that I received through that photo book selling will goes toward some of the orphanage that needed help…I will arrange with Haeri noona to do that while I’m gone….”

Seohyun: “That is wonderful Joon…I will support your good cause in any way that I can….”

Joon: “Yes you can…by just being yourself…be the Seohyun of SNSD that I always know all this time…that alone…is more than enough to make me feel good about this charity cause….stay strong noona…the path of a celebrity is never easy but I know for sure that you are strong enough to face any challenge and you will continue to show us the more improved Seohyun in the future….goodbye noona…thank you for everything…hopefully someday I will be able to meet you again like this when I am able to reach my dream…”

Seohyun: “We will Joon…I’m sure of it…goodbye Joon…good luck with your treatment and I wish you all the best of luck for you to reach your dream…bye….”

She gives him another hug before she walks out of the room. Her steps feel heavy because she wants to talk with him some more but she thinks it will make the goodbye only harder. Once outside, they also say their goodbyes with Haeri but after Taeyeon and Yoona finished saying their goodbyes, Haeri hugs Seohyun tightly and whisper something on her ear,

Haeri: “When you got home…don’t be surprised…Joon’s gift is waiting for you back in the dorm…I think you will like it…”

Seohyun: “Ah okay unnie…thank you…thanks for everything….”

Haeri: “Don’t say it like that…Joon is the one going away, I will still be here in Korea and cheering for you girls until there are no more energy left in me…hehe…”

Seohyun: “Ah that’s right…okay then unnie…I guess I will be seeing on the event tonight then?”

Haeri: “You bet I will…hehe…bye Seohyun…take care…”

Seohyun: “You too unnie…bye….”

She joins Taeyeon and Yoona walking toward the exit where Seohyun’s mother is already waiting for them on the car park of the hospital. She’s looking back to see Haeri unnie is smiling at her and she feels grateful to experience this short but meaningful encounter with Haeri and Joon. They enter the elevator and then when they reach the lobby they quickly make their way to the car park. When they are back in the car, Seohyun is more silent than usual; there are a lot of things going on inside her mind. Joon told her that she is the inspiration of his life but seeing how someone with a troublesome childhood and not having an easy life either manage to pick himself up and having a positive view of life and trying to reach his dream like that, she should remember his story whenever she feels down or there are problems in her life as a celebrity.

SNSD’s Dorm, 12:05 PM

SEOHYUN POV

I go back into the dorm with Taeyeon and Yoona unnie, the other SNSD members are already inside the dorm but I don’t see them anywhere in the living room as we enter. Taeyeon is shouting at them to find out where they are but strange enough, Fany unnie is shouting back at Taeyeon unnie and it seems that the others are inside my room. We walk toward my room and I am so shocked to see the unnies are inside my room and they all are standing up surrounding something big, covered by white cloth. Seeing the shape of it, it seems to be a huge picture from the looks of it, the height is around 2 meters or so. It has a horizontal shape…I wonder just what this picture is and what is it doing in my room,

Seohyun: “What is this unnie?”

Sunny: “This arrives shortly after all of us got back to the dorm.”

Tiffany: “Someone delivered this…”

Jessica: “For you maknae…”

Seohyun: “Eh?”

Sooyoung: “It seems to be a huge picture…I don’t know…we haven’t taken a peek yet…”

Hyoyeon: “Probably from your stalker maknae…”

Yuri: “Why don’t you go and take off the white cloth that covering the picture?”

Seohyun: “Okay unnie…”

This must be the gift that Haeri unnie told me before back at the hospital. I wonder just what the picture is…my best guess is that it will be my picture but I am not entirely sure of it until I see it myself.

I take off the white cloth and I can hear all the unnies are gasping behind me and they are right to do that. It is a really huge picture…a collage….made of I don’t know how many pictures of me. The first sentence is made of the collage of SNSD’s pictures but for my name he put my pictures only for the collage. This…this is not something new…a lot of us have received a collage before but…that message, ‘Seohyun, you will always be the light that will shine my path until I reach my dream’. It really means so much to me….If Joon just gave this to me without hearing his story before then the meaning of this will be lessened. But after hearing his story and receiving this gift of his…I…really thankful…I thank you for him…he turns out to be a very important person in my life that helps me to see more of this world…he opens up my mind even more than it already is.  All the unnie inside the room are really taking a look at each pictures in the collage and they seems to be happy to see me receiving such gift.

Our managers quickly call some of us to get ready because we are going to leave for another schedule soon while I still staying in my room to get a better look at this picture. Yoona unnie hesitate to leave the room and then she stands by my side and whispers to me,

Yoona: “When a male fan idolize one of us…it is normal to think that this fan harbor the hope of dating us someday…no matter how hard it is and how impossible that is…I think it is normal for fans to think like that…but Joon…he is different. I think from the start he never has that kind of intention to you. He only use you as a source of his inspiration, he always looks up to you and always wish you all the best no matter in your career or in romance too like what he said about your involvement with Yonghwa oppa in WGM. He…is a precious fan…a precious stalker…and should be a precious person in your life that you should never forget…”

After saying that she pats me on my head and she asks me to come out as soon as I finish looking at this piece of art in front of me. No matter how much I look at it, it still amazes me that he spent quite a lot of time in doing this, I am really thankful and I will treasure this gift from him always. I quickly grab my bag and take a sit and I take out my diary. I grab my pen and I write down another entry to my diary,

Dear Diary,

This is Seo Joo-hyun, writing this diary entry again. It might not be the last entry that I will make on this diary but it surely will be the last entry that will have something to do with Joon. Time flies so fast…and it seems that the past week or so is just so surreal. I never thought I would experience so many things….so many emotions in just a short time. I met with Haeri unnie and Joon…I am grateful to meet the two of them as they open up another chapter of my life, even though it is only a short one, but it was a meaningful encounter.

When I heard Joon’s story today, I keep wondering whether there are a lot more people like him who struggle with their lives emotionally. People can only take so much when they are facing hardship in their lives but hearing his story…I think the right words that can be used to describe him are ‘never give up’. I used to think that becoming an idol is something that really hard. Especially years ago, I am really uncomfortable being close with men or wearing something that is slightly revealing or y…those things really bothered me and sometimes it even makes me cry to think that I have to go through all those stuffs in order to become successful in this industry but I was wrong to have that kind of attitude.

There are a lot more people like Joon who struggle even more with their lives and I should be more thankful that I get this opportunity to be a part of SNSD and meeting a lot of interesting people and befriending 8 unnies that become a part of my life that I treat like my real family now. I always thankful for it and thanks to Joon, his story reminded me to stay positive for any obstacles that are waiting for me in the future. I will be able to pass the obstacle no matter how hard it is and I should try not to be someone that I am not in doing it. I am Seo Joo-hyun or SNSD’s Seohyun as many people know it and I will strive to be a much better person to represent myself and to represent SNSD.

For the SNSD unnies that I know really well…I am really thankful for them for helping me with my troubles lately. Even though most of the time I am stubborn enough that I am not listening to them all the time, they keep reminding me and trying to lead me to the right path. I will always cherish all 8 of them as a huge part of my life that shapes me to become the person that I am now. Thank you Yoona, Taeyeon, Tiffany, Jessica, Yuri, Sooyoung, Sunny and Hyoyeon unnie. I love you all….

For Haeri unnie…I am really sorry for treating you so rudely and impolite like that before. I should be more careful with my actions in the future and I am really glad that even though I was rude at you, you are able to forgive me so quickly and keep supporting us as SNSD. I might not know you that well unnie…but I am sure that you are a really kind person…I am so thankful that I got to know you unnie….

Lastly…for Joon. It is quite weird and crazy to think that stuffs like these are happening to me but….It doesn’t mean that I regret knowing your existence at all. That day during the Guerilla Date filming, I hate you and upset at you so much that I used to think a lot of bad stuffs about you but today…you have become something precious in my life. A memory that will always everlasting for me…our meeting will be something that really hard for me to forget for the rest of my life. I wish you good luck in your recovery and I do hope that you will be able to reach your dream and don’t stop even once until you reach that dream of yours. Someday…when you have become someone that you are truly wish to be…I’m sure we will meet again…maybe not as a fan and an idol…but as a friend. Thank you Joon…and I hope that someday we will meet again in a very different circumstance…thank you….no matter where you are or what you are going to be…you will always be….

My Beautiful Stalker

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Finally the end of this short story. This is the first time that I have ever written a story this short so hopefully I am able to convey my ideas into the story correctly so that you can feel the flow of the storyline going smoothly. I have decided to change this to a non M rated story because of some changes on the storyline. It was originally a bit darker with some scenes that can be perceived as M rated but I decided to drop all that.

So with this final chapter of the story I really want to thank you all of you for reading the story. Some of you might have been subscribers from my other story, some of you might found me through this story but either way, I want to thank you for reading this story and I hope that you really enjoy it so far, especially for Seohyun's fans because this story is probably directed to you guys more than anyone.

So in the end...I would appreciate it that you can support me too on my other stories...only if you haven't do it and if you feel that it is worthy to do so...I will provide the links to my other stories below and if you haven't check it out, please do so... :)

Two Worlds | When Business and Love Collide | Simple Love Story

I will mark the story as complete but I haven't close the possibility of continuing this story in the future but as for the time being...I am more than satisfied that the story ends this way...I will work on my current running story and I am planning to start a new story as well with Taeyeon as the main character.

Once again thank you for your support, thanks for reading and I hope I can intereact with you all again on my other stories.

Gomawoooo!! :D :D