March 4th

I just want to say one thing to you. No matter what, I love you. Even now that I'm not here, I love you. I could never love anything more than I've loved you. And even long after these bone turn to dust and everybody forgets my name, I will love you. 
I know that it'll be hard but you'll be okay. I know that if I die, you'll spend countless night sleep deprived, depressed, hurt, damaged... I'm scared of hurting you like that. I love you so much... How could God do this? Make me love you so much just to take me away? He wouldn't do that right? They say God is kind, God is merciful but I feel anything but mercy lately. Maybe we're not meant to be? Maybe our sheer will to love each other is what keeps us together. It's hard to imagine a love like this is by accident, when I feel your touch before it happens, the way your lips become one with mine... The way I just knew you. The moment I saw you, it was like I just knew... peace. That couldn't have been an accident. You're already mine so I refuse to believe it. And that is why I won't die. Because I love you. And even if this was an accident, it doesn't matter because I love you. Even when I am not here, I will love you. Even if this shell of a body dies, my love for you will not. You can always depend on that.

Love