[September 8th: Seoul, South Korea 9:01 PM]

 

“What’s going on?” questioned Junsu softly as he looked up at Nikki sitting on the arm of his chair beside him as he and Yoochun sat quietly in Jaejoong’s living room. “Why did Jae sound so serious on the phone earlier?”

 

“Just wait,” Nikki advised softly as she reached up with her slightly trembling hand and patted Junsu’s shoulder reassuringly.

 

“I know you know,” whispered Junsu softly. “Just tell me.”

 

“Wait,” she countered immediately. “Just wait.”

 

“Where is Jaejoong?” spoke up Yoochun from the couch. “What is he doing?”

 

“He’ll be here in a minute,” supplied Nikki gently. “Just wait.”

 

“You’ve been saying that for a half-hour,” grumbled Yoochun as he placed his coffee cup on the couch side table between them, crossed his arms across his chest in frustration and leaned back with a disgruntled look.

 

“I know,” mumbled Nikki nervously as she tried to hide the slight tremble in her hand with her other hand and fiddled with her heart-shaped ring on her finger worriedly. 

 

As the moments seem to pass slowly, Nikki couldn’t help but worry about what was going to happen. Even though Jaejoong had been forthcoming with her about the Lady’s intentions, he had remained tight-lipped about why he really wanted her in the room when he told his brothers. That unknown had been pressing down on her all day. Jaejoong knew something she didn’t, knew what the conversation they were about to have would invoke in his brothers, and yet he couldn’t bring himself to say it out loud to her. Something was going to happen, something potentially bad, and that thought alone was making Nikki extremely nervous.

 

The silence in the room was finally broken when the sound of Jaejoong shuffling out of the backroom, down the hall, and into the living room finally reached everyone’s ears. Looking up from his chair, Junsu took in Jaejoong’s almost worried and completely stressed face in concern. It had been a long time since he had seen that look and it made his heart feel heavy. Jaejoong, with what looked like a large vanilla folder clutched in his right hand, made his way past where Junsu and Nikki sat, pass the coffee table in front of the couch, and quietly settled into the opposite wingback chair across the room. Closing his eyes and releasing a deep sigh thereafter, Jaejoong dropped the folder on the edge of the coffee table and looked up at his brothers.

 

“What’s going on Jae?” questioned Yoochun immediately.

 

“There’s something we need to discuss,” came Jaejoong almost strained voice. “It’s about the contract with Haze Media.”

 

“Did we get it?” questioned Junsu curiously.

 

“Yes,” Jaejoong breathed out slowly. “But there are conditions.”

 

Junsu immediately felt Nikki tense up beside him and glanced up at her to notice that she was intently focused on Jaejoong.

 

“What do they want?” questioned Yoochun.

 

“We have to agree to a month-long retreat,” supplied Jaejoong slowly

 

“A retreat?   For a month?” questioned Junsu suspiciously. “Where?”

 

“The island of Molokai,” answered Jaejoong gently.

 

“Hawaii?” exclaimed Yoochun, instantly recognizing the name. “Are you serious?”

 

“Well, hell, that doesn’t sound bad all,” dismissed Yoochun. “Hawaii is absolutely breathtaking anyway, it will be a nice vacation.”

 

“We’re not going there for vacation,”  sighed Jaejoong difficulty as he ran his hand through his hair and glance down at the file in front of him.

 

“Then why?” questioned Junsu worriedly.

 

 

 

[September 8th: Seoul, South Korea 9:20 PM]

“Welcome home!” smiled Changmin as he looked up from the living room couch and waved at Yunho standing in the doorway clutching the handle of his suitcase.

 

“Hey, Min,” nodded Yunho as he stepped into the room and kicked off his shoes. “What are you doing here at this hour, aren’t you supposed to be at dance practice?”

 

“Got the day off,” replied Changmin as he pointed to his foot resting on the coffee table covered with an ice pack.

 

“What did you do?” questioned Yunho worriedly as he walked over to him and looked down at the swollen ankle.

 

“Twisted it,” sighed Changmin.

 

“Does it hurt?” interrogated Yunho.

 

“Not really. Just swollen,” replied Changmin with a reassuring nod. “Doc says to keep it elevated till the swelling goes down. He’ll be by in the morning, early, to check on it.”

 

“Ok,” nodded Yunho understandingly as he took a seat beside the injured man. “Did anything happen while I was gone?”

 

“Not really,” smiled Changmin mischievously.

 

“Doesn’t look like it to me,” scoffed Yunho disbelievingly. “What are you up to?”

 

“Nothing. Just,” smiled Changmin almost triumphantly. “I finally managed to con Nini to come over and keep me company a few days ago.”

 

“You and your damn guilt trips,” mumbled Yunho with a shake of the head. “What happened?”

 

“Nothing,” smiled Changmin. “We just had dinner, watched a movie, and talked.”

 

“You know,” added Changmin. “I’ve always felt close to her, not in a weird way though. So, it was really nice to get to know her a little bit better – a little brother and sister time.”

 

“Learn anything interesting?” questioned Yunho, completely curious.

 

“Did you know that she was in the audience during our final performance together?” questioned Changmin before trailing off softly. “As a family?”

 

“No,” breathed out Yunho in disbelief, with a slight tinge of regret lacing his words, as he leaned back against the couch. “She never mentioned that.”

 

“We...we talked about that day,” continued Changmin softly, his eyes flickering with pain, barely hidden.

 

“That must have been hard for you,” ventured Yunho understandingly.

 

“It...It was,” he replied, forcing a smile. “But it was good too. I finally got a firsthand account of what the fans actually saw that day. It was hard to hear, really hard to hear, but it made me finally realized how wrong we all were...especially me.”

 

“Hey!” countered Yunho, sitting up immediately and looking at his little brother with determined and warning eyes. “Don’t go there.”

 

“But,” interjected Changmin only to be cut off by Yunho instantly.

 

“We all ed up,” replied Yunho “So just let that go. You’ve spent enough time blaming yourself for it, as we all have, you need to stop right now.”

 

“You’re right. I know you’re right, but,” stammered Changmin sadly. “Talking to her, about that time, really made me miss them even more. And then after that, I started thinking about what we did. What I did, what they did and then, all the that we’ve gone through since. What they’ve gone through since..."

 

“And I just feel, guilty as hell!" interjected Changmin frustratingly.

 

“We were young,” excused Yunho softly.

 

“Not that damn young,” countered Changmin. “It wasn’t like we were still wet behind the ears, teenagers Yunho!”

 

“Fine,” admonished Yunho with a frown. “You’re right. We weren’t kids then but we still were young. We did stupid , let stupid get in the way of what we wanted, let people fill our ing heads with complete and utter bull and acted like idiots. But we chose what we chose, and that decision can never be undone. No matter how much we want to go back to the past and change it.”

 

A long silence fell between the two brothers as each of them tried to internalize their frustration and heartache that had always lingered from that moment in time. Yunho understood Changmin’s feelings, and Changmin understood Yunho’s, but that knowledge never lessened the pain each of them still carried because of it.

 

“But,” ventured Yunho a few more quiet moments later as the memory of his meeting with the Lady flickered across his mind. “There is a way we can make it right...”

 

“If you’re willing,” he added with pleading eyes as he turned to Changmin.

 

“What are you talking about Yun?” questioned Changmin worriedly.

 

 

 

[September 8th: Seoul, South Korea 9:35 PM]

 

“ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?” screamed Junsu; jumping from his chair so forcefully that he knocked Nikki off the chair’s armrest and on to the floor hard; as he glared ferociously at his brother.

 

“Junsu!” scolded Yoochun, immediately clamoring off the couch and coming to Nikki’s side.

 

“You ok?” he whispered, softly.

 

“WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?” yelled Junsu, clenching his fist tightly at his sides, as he took a step towards his brother sitting across the room. “YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS JAEJOONG?!”

 

Answering only with a quiet nod, Nikki kept her surprised eyes trained on Junsu’s irate form and allowed Yoochun to help her up.

 

“I am,” replied Jaejoong, trying to hide his nervousness behind a calm tone, as he stood to face his brother.

 

“You have completely ing lost it!” cursed Junsu angrily. “You have, haven’t you?”

 

“You, ing, must-have,” he continued when Jaejoong didn’t respond. “To have the damn balls to sit there and ask this of us.”

 

“Junsu,” warned Yoochun.

 

“SHUT UP!” fired back Junsu. “Don’t even ing tell me you’re considering it!”

 

“I didn’t say that!” countered Yoochun, his now naturally calm demeanor gone in a flash. “But you haven’t heard Jae out yet. LET HIM TALK!”

 

“I DON’T NEED TO HEAR A GODDAMN THING HE HAS TO SAY!” screamed Junsu at the top of his lungs.

 

“Junsu!” came Nikki’s worried voice as she reached up and grabbed his shoulder gently. “Stop.”

 

“ OUT, NOONA!” warned Junsu hatefully as he shrugged off her touch.

 

Nikki instantly stepped back from him, fear flickering across her face, as her mind reeled at Junsu’s behavior. She had never seen him like this, so angry, so cold, and it frightened her. He was always such a nice guy, treating everyone lovingly, and now all of sudden it was like he was a completely different person.

 

“It’s the only way,” ventured Jaejoong, trying to explain the decision he had come to without them.

 

“THE ONLY WAY?” countered Junsu. “There is no ing way! I told you a long goddamn time ago that I never wanted to see his smug ing face again and I meant it!!”

 

“That little ruined everything!” he screamed, nearly shaking from anger, and he swiped his hand in front of himself dismissively. “We went through years of hell because he couldn’t get over his own goddamn hang-ups...because he couldn’t keep his ing mouth shut...and now you want to ing go back? What the is wrong with you!!!”

 

“STOP BLAMING HIM!” exploded Jaejoong, his self-enforced calmness gone, as he narrowed his eyes hatefully at Junsu. “He didn’t know any better!”

 

Nikki flinched. Who didn’t know any better?

 

“I cannot believe you are still ing defending him!” countered Junsu. “After...after everything we went through because of them. Him. All the he started and after everything, we’ve worked so hard for; to accomplish, from then until now. Now, all of sudden..."

 

"YOU WANT TO JUST TUCK YOUR TAIL BETWEEN YOUR LEGS AND GO BACK?”

 

“GODDAMNIT SU!” yelled Yoochun as he walked up beside the irate man and pushed his shoulder. “STOP!”

 

“ OFF YOOCHUN!” countered Junsu as he pushed his brother back. “You know I’m ing right!”

 

“We would have still been a happy ing family,” growled Junsu before screaming. “IF IT HADN’T BEEN FOR CHANGMIN’S MOUTH!”

 

“Changmin?” questioned Nikki quietly to herself as she watched the faces of the three brother’s, before her, growing increasingly angry as the seconds ticked by.

 

“SHUT UP!” ordered Jaejoong coldly. “He was still a ing kid!”

 

“No the he wasn’t, Jae,” came Yoochun’s dismissive voice. “Su is right about that, at least. You know damn well that none of that would have started if Min hadn’t opened his mouth and ratted us out to the company!”

 

“SEE!” pointed out Junsu. “Chunnie isn’t ing stupid, he knows what the hell happened –just like we all do- and knows I’m ing right!”

 

“Don’t lump me in with you Su!” replied Yoochun. “Min ed up...but that doesn’t justify you taking it out on Jaejoong when all he’s trying to...”

 

“What?” scoffed Junsu. “Fix things?”

 

 “I DON’T WANT A ING THING FIXED!” countered Junsu ferociously. “I love my life now. I don’t need them and neither do you!”

 

“You don’t miss them?” questioned Yoochun in disbelief.

 

“HELL NO!” growled Junsu. “They betrayed us, and for what, because Min couldn’t handle the real world. Because Yunho was too damn scared that his PERFECT life would be ruined...because of...”

 

“Goddamn it, Junsu!” growled Jaejoong angrily. “Stop!”

 

“Hell no!” fired back Junsu. “You opened this can of bull! It’s your damn fault I am like this so you ing stop!”

 

“I’m only trying to,” exasperated Jaejoong in frustration.

 

“I will never ing go back to them. NEVER!” interjected Junsu with finality. “NEVER!”

 

The room immediately went quiet as Junsu declaration lingered in the tension-filled air. Nikki watched at the three brother’s fumed silently for a moment and then instantly started back up, yelling and screaming. The more they yelled the angrier they got. And the angrier they got the more pissed off and worried Nikki began to feel. Watching three people she cared about the most in this world, suddenly at each other’s throats and nearly ready to tear each other limb from limb, was just too much.

 

As Junsu tirade got worse and worse, she began to notice a harsh change in Jaejoong’s face. He was angry, sure, but the more and more Junsu slung insults and berated his brothers, the more Jaejoong’s mood soured and turned into something more akin to misery than of anger and frustration. Lost in their own little world of anger and regret, the three brothers lost all track of the world around them and went all out, pulling no punches, letting each other know what they really thought, really felt, in blazing and heartless fashion.

 

Their voices blurred together in a flurry of anger as Nikki stood there, her heart screaming for them to stop, as she watched the chaotic meltdown before her. She had to stop this, stop it before someone went too far before one of them said something they couldn’t take back. But what could she do? She had no right to open , to interfere. She hadn’t been there. She wasn’t a part of their lives back then. She didn’t know what started it all. She was...just an outsider.

 

Suddenly, Jaejoong said something that Nikki didn’t quite catch but Junsu’s reaction was immediate. He took two steps and instantaneously pulled back his fist to punch Jaejoong in the face. Yoochun and Nikki bolted to Junsu’s side, to stop him. As Yoochun grabbed Junsu’s arm, Nikki came up behind Junsu and put her hand on the man’s shoulder.

 

“Please stop, Su!” she begged.

 

So far gone, Junsu didn’t hear a word she said and jerked his arm back trying to pry it loose from Yoochun’s grip. The movement, so unexpected, caught Nikki completely off guard as Junsu’s elbow suddenly slammed into her face, catching her right under her right eye. Falling backward in pain and shock, she clipped the edge of the small coffee table near the end of the couch, knocking Yoochun’s coffee cup on to the floor, causing it to shatter seconds before her body landed on top of it.

 

“NONE OF THIS WOULD HAVE ING HAPPENED ANYWAY,” suddenly came Junsu’s viciously condescending voice as he pointed at Jaejoong.  “IF YOU WOULD HAVE KEPT YOUR ING IN YOUR PANTS, IN THE FIRST PLACE!”

 

That was it. The spell was broken.

 

What happened next, no one would have expected in a million years. The three brothers, in their anger, never noticed what happened seconds before, but the aftermath was clear; when Nikki suddenly appeared in front of Junsu, reared her hand back and slapped him across the face with every ounce of her strength causing Junsu to fall down upon his previously vacated chair.

 

“ENOUGH!” she screamed, breathing heavily, arm bleeding from the broken glass impaled in her arm and running down her skin, as tears welled up in her eyes and threatened to spill forth.

 

 “Noona,” called out Jaejoong in surprise.

 

“WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?” questioned Nikki angrily as she pointed her finger at Junsu’s, truly surprised, form.

 

“I...I...” stammered Junsu.

 

“Shut up!” ordered Nikki instantly. “How dare you, talk to your bothers like that! What the hell’s wrong with you Kim JUNSU!?”

 

“After everything that Jae had done for you! After everything he has gone through,” she berated, her voice getting louder and louder with every word. “Why, the , are you doing this to him?!”

 

“Nikki,” gasped Yoochun softly, his voice a mix of worry and surprise, as those words fell from her lips.

 

“You’ve all had your damn say,” countered Nikki as she raised her blood-streaked arm towards Yoochun, motioning him to stay silent, but never tearing her eyes from Junsu. “Now it’s my ing turn.”

 

“I may be a damn outsider in all this,” she prompted pointedly. “But I will not stand by and let this continue, not for another second!”

 

Narrowing her eyes at the man that she had always liked, respected, loved and adored, Nikki glared almost hatefully at Junsu.

 

“IS THIS WHAT WE SUFFERED FOR?” she questioned angrily. “IS THIS WHAT WE CRIED FOR, WHAT WE AGONIZED OVER, WORRIED OVER AND SOME NEARLY DIED FOR?!”

 

“How dare you, HOW DARE YOU DO THIS TO HIM!” she stated coldly, her furry loosed for them all to see. “Jae has done nothing but protect you all this time. He has sacrificed everything, EVERYTHING, to keep you three together when the world wanted nothing more than to rip you apart. He gave up his life, his time, HIS HEART, sacrificed his health and even his sanity to keep you all together, to keep what was left of a broken family from falling even farther apart...and all you can do is scream at him like he’s a ing villain!”

 

“I can’t believe you!” she huffed in disbelief. “Are you really the Kim Junsu that I know? Are you really the guy who would do anything for his brothers, who would go so far as to jump in front of a bullet to protect their life...who believes in family, loyalty, understanding, and love above all others. OR, IS THIS THE REAL YOU? A SELFISH, HEARTLESS, BASTARD WHO ONLY CARES ABOUT HIS DAMN SELF?!”

 

“Selfish?” stammered Junsu, more hurt than offended.

 

“YES, SELFISH!” fired back Nikki angrily. “Do you have any idea how hard it was for him to come to this decision, what he had to overcome just to even try...Do you know how much he agonized over telling you? Do you know how much pain he’s been in ever since this burden was laid at his feet...?”

 

“No, of course not,” she answered for him, forcing herself to calm down a bit. “Because you don’t ing care about anything but your own damn pain. You don’t see what this is doing to him, what this is doing to Yoochun, what your separation is doing to the fans who would gladly follow you to the ends of the earth, and you sure as don’t see what watching the three of you like this is doing to me!”

 

“I have spent over a decade watching over all of you; supporting you, praying for you, worrying for you, and even loving you!” she admitted. “I watched you grow up in this life, constantly worried that the world would eventually tear you down and make you into something I knew you weren’t. And even though loving all of you made me suffer far worse than any else in my life, I stood by you because I believed in you. I believed in what you could do, what you could accomplish. I kept the faith because I trusted in you!”

 

“And now that you have a chance to make right what went wrong so long ago,” she nearly growled. “You’re throwing a ing temper tantrum like a god damn five-year-old!”

 

Letting out a deep breath, trying to calm herself before she succumbed to the well-hidden dark side of her personality that she had suppressed for almost twenty years, Nikki closed her eyes and bit down her lip to stifle the ungodly hateful insult that flashed across her mind in that instant.

 

“Do you have any idea what the happiest moment in my entire life was?” questioned Nikki almost abruptly. “Do you...?”

 

“Noona,” breathed out Jaejoong “Don’t.”

 

“You don’t do you?” she scoffed dejectedly, ignoring Jaejoong’s warning, as she took a stepped towards Junsu. “You claim to know me well. You claim that you’re my best friend. You claim that you don’t know how you lived without knowing before. But you don’t... you don’t know me. You have no ing clue.”

 

Junsu looked up at Nikki, completely lost. He didn’t know what to say.

 

“It was the moment that you three walked into my workroom,” she admitted as she did her best to stop her voice from wavering.“The moment I looked up and saw you smiling back at me for the very first time.”

 

“When I saw you...saw that the three of you were really standing right there in front of me,” she continued. “For the first time in my life, I finally realized that I could finally do what I always wanted to. What I always dreamed of doing.”

 

“What?” breathed out Junsu.

 

“To give back to you what you gave to me!” she answered, heartbreak lacing her every word, as she fought back the tears pooling in her eyes. “To thank you. To do everything I could to make your life better. To show you how much you mean to me, to all of us, to show you my gratitude for saving my life!”

 

“I thought I could do this. I thought that if I was by your sides, I would have the strength to endure what I knew would be my own, personal, little hell,” she continued. “But even though I knew it was going to be hard, I stuck by you because I love all of you!”

 

“But now,” she sighed heartbrokenly as he looked down at her ring. “I can’t do this anymore!”

 

“Noona what are you saying?” questioned Jaejoong worriedly. The tone of her voice suddenly igniting a wildfire of fear within him.

 

“I can’t,” she breathed out as she slipped her heart-shaped ring from her finger. “I can’t take it...”

 

“Nikki, please don’t do this...!” begged Jaejoong, his heart suddenly plunging into the pit of his stomach as his eyes fell up the ring in her hand.

 

“I’m sorry, Jae,” she stammered for a second before sighing “I’m...done.”

 

"I can't watch you guys do this to yourself, all over again!"

 

Before Jaejoong could say another word, Nikki dropped her ring on the floor at Junsu’s feet and ran out of the apartment in tears, slamming the door behind her for good measure. As Junsu reached out and picked up her ring slowly, Jaejoong put his hands up to his mouth and gasped at the realization of what leaving her ring behind really meant.

 

“No!” he called out desperately before suddenly bolting across the apartment and running out the door after her.

 

As Junsu looked at the ring that she had always worn, every day, in his hand, turning the band from left to right, he caught the inscription he had never seen before inscribed into the band underneath.

 

Always keep the faith.

 

“Do you have any idea what you’ve done?” breathed out Yoochun slowly before turning on his heels and following after Jaejoong.

 

When Jaejoong’s feet hit the sidewalk outside he was already out of breath and panicking beyond belief. Nikki had stormed out leaving her most precious possession behind. The one thing she would never just let go of. The one thing in this world that was a symbol of not only her enduring gratitude but the very symbol of her love for them. Scanning the surrounding area frantically, he looked for any signs of their Noona but saw nothing.

 

“Where is she?” he questioned as he glanced down the sidewalk in one direction and then the other.

 

“I have to find her. I have to stop her before it’s too late,” cried out Jaejoong as he turned his right and started running down the block.

 

When he reached the corner of the block, Jaejoong continued to scan his surroundings as he tried to rack his brain on which way Nikki would have gone. Minutes passed as the man tried to think of where to go next until his attention was grabbed by two pairs of running footsteps. Turning to look behind him, Jaejoong spotted Yoochun sprinting down the block towards him with Junsu on his heels.

 

Before Jaejoong could say anything to his brothers, the sound of screeching tires and screams of terror echoed from down the street. 

 

 

 

 

 

A/N: OH NOES! Epic nuclear meltdown and a cliffhanger...whoops. :D For those who may be wondering what Nikki's ring looks like, here's a photo of the original design.