Months passed and I pushed all the heartaches and emotions. I see Gerald other once in awhile but it’s just about business and work.  I would travel to Singapore, Beijing, Hong Kong and sometimes going to the states to meet up with clients. I date but nothing serious. Maja was beginning to call me a playgirl since I’ve been dating different guys once a week.  I heard a rumor that Gerald proposed to Mia, at least according to Maja.  She thought for a moment that nothing more can rekindle her friendship with Gerald nor even go further than what she could imagine.

I decided to look for another job and fortunate to get hired in another well known firm.  I got called in to Gerald’s office right after emailed him my resignation.  When Gerald read the letter of resignation, he felt sad and broken.  He called Kim in his office and talked a bit but she left right away since she has meeting to attend to.

After 2 years we attended a friend’s wedding (Maja and Matteo) he went there without his girlfriend. We were in the same table so we don’t have any other choice but to talk. Gerald asked me how I was and he said he missed me. I asked how he was too and how was his relationship with the Mia. He said that they’re doing fine. He asked me if I am dating someone right now I said yes even though I’m not. He said that I’m still playful and not wanting to commit. He told me that I was a playgirl. Gerald said those words as if I did play with his heart. Tears fell down my eyes, if he only knew why I didn’t get serious with those boys. If he only knew how I waited for him to tell me he loves me. I can’t bear the thought of him seeing me cry so I left the party. Gerald run after me and asked me why and right there I confessed how much I love him, how much I care for him and how everyday I prayed that he’d love me back. Gerald was so speechless that all he did was to hug me tight. I pushed him away and run. I changed number so he won’t be able to call me. Gerald sends numerous email and left many messages but I didn’t read them.

I started to move on and live with my life. One day the bell rang in my house and it was Jake and Mel. They told me that Gerald has been trying to reach me. I just shrugged it and changed the topic. The pain is too much that I can’t bear talking about him. Mel handed me an envelope. To my surprise it is a wedding invitation, Gerald’s wedding invitation. I was trying so hard to stop the tears from falling but I can’t. I opened the invitation a small folded paper fell on the floor I picked it up and it was a note saying, “Kim, this could have been us”. What?! I told myself. I remembered the emails that he sent me curious of what was it about, I started browsing my inbox for it.

Kim

I am trying to call you but I guess you changed your number. I know it was very hard for you to tell me how you feel because I know you’re not that kind of person. And believe me it was hard for me too.  For the past 4 years I just thought you’re not interested in me. You told me the type of guy that you like and that you have this rule of NEVER A FRIEND. So I’d rather have you as a friend than not have you at all.

I love you too sooo much since the day you smiled at me at the bus stop. Ever since that night I was praying for you. When you told me that I looked good with Mia I just gave up and thought that maybe you don’t really like me and that I am just a special friend to you. I gave up and courted her. I know I should’ve told you. I just don’t have the courage.

I am sorry for being such a jerk and for telling you those words but if you could give me chance to love you I promise I will love you forever and I will not break your heart. Please answer me. If you don’t then I’ll understand.

Loving you always,

Gerald

What have I done? Kim was in desperate answer.