Epilogue

Trust The Little Bird [completed]
I am Jaejoong. Kim Jaejoong. Some call me Boo. Some call me Jaejoongie. Some call me Young Woong. Some even call me Young Woong Boojaejoongie. But for now, simply just call me Jaejoong.

There is not much to know about me. The only facts that you pretty much need to know is that I am twenty-two, am the top of my undergraduate class, and will be entering medical school the coming year. Becoming a doctor may not be my dream occupation—I mean, injecting vaccines into squirmy little kids is not exactly my cup of tea—but it was tolerable and above all stable. I would be able to receive a steady monthly income that covered all necessary expenses by sitting at an office all day talking to patients about their illnesses. Moreover, it made my parents extremely proud to have a medical doctor in the family. While my colleagues dreamed of discovering the cure for cancer, I dreamt of becoming a perfectly normal doctor that worked at a small clinic a block away from an apartment that could be called home.

Yunho did not listen to me when I told him not to send me letters or emails, but he never seemed to mind when I never replied to them. He knew that I would read them anyways.

Aside from the usual formalities, his emails were mostly about the conservatory updates. From them, I learned that Yoochun and Junsu were officially a married couple, and apparently they expected a baby in six months. Yoochun took over the conservatory as Yunho’s successor after Yunho retired, and I felt happy for him despite my legitimate prejudice. Changmin is now a famous pianist after he won it big at a competition in Poland; he isn’t single anymore, thank god, and apparently his boyfriend is a Parisian-based recording artist named Kibum. Furthermore, another sixteen-year-old prodigy started attending the conservatory as well, Taemin, his name was. I silently wished him luck, and hoped that he would be able to find a place for himself there.

Life at home was alright as well. Eunhyuk and Donghae still maintained their relationship, which was surprising considering all the bickering they do. It was even smoother than any of us thought it would be; they could quarrel for hours about if Batman or Superman was better, or whether chocolate was healthy or not. Even I was expecting them to break up after a week. Their relationship is now at three years and counting. Heechul, on the other hand, had a perfectly wretched time with his relationship with Han Geng. After weeks of dialed phone calls that were never picked up and emails that were never replied, my best friend started giving up on his boyfriend slash true love. Putting all his heartbreak into his studies, he actually made it into university with a scholarship just enough to cover living expenses. I was impressed since Heechul usually never studied for more than ten minutes a day. Whenever I jokingly told him that at least something good came out of Han Geng’s departure, he would slap me and sulk for the rest of the day. He just recently started a relationship with a gentlemanly man named Choi Siwon, and though I liked Han Geng better, Siwon was a nice enough guy. Curiously, Heechul’s engagement ring never left his finger.

My relationship with Yunho continued, though not physically or verbally. I still love him and still miss him like crazy, but unlike before, I can endure it now. Though I am still single and have no intention of looking for a girlfriend or boyfriend anytime soon, it was not because of my love for Yunho. Okay, fine, it was, but I convinced myself that he was just a happy reminiscence that would never leave my mind. I had to to that: he had his own family to take care of.

“JAEJOOOOOONG!” a screechy voice that belonged to Heechul reached my ears. Did I mention that Heechul and I are roommates this semester? How he managed to talk me into this, I had no clue.

“Yah?”

“Siwon’s coming over, is that alright?”

“Sure, just don’t do anything naughty.”

“Dad, you know I’m not ready for that!”

“Like I’ll believe you,” I joked though I totally believed him. Ever since Han Geng left, he hardly went outside anymore, which was not like him at all!

“Well, believe it or not, it’s true,” Heechul screamed. “Now wait at the door for him while I beg Sungmin for his hairbands.”

I rolled my eyes as my best friend bolted out of the room to the dorm next door, acting like a schoolgirl on her first date. Despite being unable to concentrate, I buried my nose back into my textbook and sighed.

Before long, a knock was heard on the door and I stood up. “Coming!” I shouted. I stretched a bit before letting the guest in. “Hey Siwon, Heechul’s just—”

Then I realized that it wasn’t Siwon. “H-Han Geng!” I blinked in surprise. “It’s you! You’re back!”

The Chinese man had grown taller since I last saw him, and he was dressed in a spiffy black suit and black sunglasses. He looked surprised at my remark. “Of course I’m back; I promised Heechul that I would return, didn’t I?”

“I know, I know,” I stammered, “But it’s been four years!” I shakily let him into the room where he plopped onto the couch.

Han Geng nodded. “Sorry for the wait. My parents wanted me to open a business for them. I had to tie things up before coming back. Bought the first flight here once everything was finished.” Then he smiled. “Where’s Heechul?”

As if on cue, the redhead crashed through the door, knocking everything in his way while fixing and re-fixing his hair. “How do I look, Jaejoong? Do I look beautiful? Like a doll? Come on, hurry up and tell me the truth!” Then he looked up and saw the man he had been waiting for who was evidently trying to restrain himself from laughing.

There was a minute of silence before I sighed. “Heechul, meet Han Geng. Han Geng, meet Heechul. I’m sure you two remember each other.”

Han Geng then walked towards Heechul and pulled him into a soft hug. A flashback of two people holding each other during the night under a streetlight went through my mind but I shook it away.

“You’re back,” Heechul whispered, pulling out of his boyfriend’s embrace.

“Yah.”

“You’re back,” Heechul repeated, a little bit louder this time.

Han Geng nodded with a huge smile on his face.

“Oh my god, Hannie, YOU’RE BACK!!!” my friend shouted at the top of his lungs, propelling himself into Han Geng’s awaiting arms. “HOW COME YOU DIDN’T RETURN MY CALLS OR RETURN MY MESSAGES!? I MISSED YOU!!!”

The taller of the two laughed. “I had lots of work to do with my father. Once I finished, I booked the first flight here.”

“It’s been four years!” Heechul marveled, eyes twinkling. I recognized that look: it was the look of falling in love all over again. It reminded me of Yunho’s handsome smile but I blinked back the thought.

“I promised you that I would be back,” Han Geng winked. “I have a present for you!”

Heechul’s smile grew wider. He didn’t seem to realize that I was still there, watching the scene like it was a soap opera.

“Ta da!” his boyfriend cheered, presenting a nicely wrapped box. “I wrapped it in red just for you.”

I smiled at that. Red was Heechul’s favorite color.

My best friend hurriedly opened his present and gasped at what was in it.

“What is it?” I asked, curiosity taking over my system.

A quiet bark and a whimper were heard and the head of a little white puppy peeked over the box wall.

“His name is Rong Rong,” Han Geng explained. “I hope you like him.”

Heechul lunged at his boyfriend. “HE’S ADORABLE!!!”

All of us laughed, but it quickly died away when a quiet knock was heard on the door. “Heechul, it’s me!”

Heechul gave me a “help-me” look while I replied with a “you-deal-with-it-yourself” one. I only stood up, opened the door to find a smiling Siwon with a bouquet of flowers, cast him a small smile, and left. It was his boy problem, and the less people dealing with it, the better. After all, I already knew who he was going to pick.

As I had nothing really that important to do, I walked around the university campus and let my mind wander; it naturally shifted towards my memories with Yunho. By then, I had totally given up on forgetting about him, and settled on reliving the happy times we had together instead of pushing them away.

I found myself in front of the Music Building after several minutes of wandering. Instinctively, I entered and asked the receptionist to open up a practice room for me. Why? I, too, had no idea. I just had this itch in my fingers that told me that they needed to touch the piano keys.

“Here you go, sir,” she smiled artificially at me. “Please be done with it in two hours.”

“Thank you.”

I walked inside and brushed my palm over the keyboard. Though I had not even touched a piano since the last time I saw Yunho, the feeling it gave me was distinctly familiar. It was like riding a bike; you just do not forget.

Although rusty, I could still move my fingers with relative facility. I played from my heart (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D_PBTGfhWD8), thinking only of Yunho. It was the closest I have felt to him since our last encounter; it felt as if he was wrapping his arms around my waist, refusing to let go.

Then I heard a chirp. A shrill one at that. Fingers stopping abruptly, I turned my head and saw a small sparrow staring right at me, perched on top of the windowsill with its head tilted. As quickly as it appeared, it flew off, out of sight. I smiled.

I kept practicing until my cell phone started vibrating. It was a text message from Heechul, and I smiled:

“Han Geng and I are getting married in the spring. He arranged everything before coming. Up for being best man? ^^”

“Totally,” I texted back.

I took this as a sign to leave and celebrate with my best friend. I checked out with the smiley receptionist and turned around to leave.

Something small caught my eye: the same sparrow was standing in front of the Music Building entrance. Giggling, I made my way towards it and stared at its striped feathers. It looked right at me and chirped once before flying towards a bench. Strangely, I felt like following it; I was like a magnet. When it darted towards a tree, I walked towards the tree. When he flew off to perch on a railing, I again followed suit. Then, when I was a foot away from the little bird that stopped at the top of a flight of stairs, it darted away and flew towards the horizon, leaving me pouting. ‘Little bugger,’ I cursed.

I noticed a person standing on the bottom step, and he was staring at me. He was a tall and handsome man with grayish brown hair, dark hazel eyes, and a scar on his forehead and left cheek. My stomach did a back flip when he cracked a smile for me.

My first thought was to run away, to turn away from the person that I knew was never going to be mine. I should have, to tell you the truth, I should have just walked away from him and pretended that we did not know each other. Then afterwards, I should have convinced myself that I was hallucinating and that it was not him at the bottom of those stairs, and eventually I should have forgotten all about the encounter.

Unfortunately, I was never one to follow my own advice. I hopped onto the staircase railing, slid down the thin metal rod, and collided into his warm awaiting embrace. Trapped in his arms, I felt free.

I did not ask any questions. It did not matter whether or not Yunho was mine. It did not matter that he was already happily married to Seulgi. It did not matter that he already had a son to take care of. It did not matter if he would not be with me tomorrow or the day after that. All that mattered was that I loved him and was in his arms once again, feeling safe and cared for.

From over his shoulder, I saw the small sparrow that brought me there, smiling down on us from a tree branch.

‘Who’s the little bugger now?” it chirped just a bit haughtily.

‘I am,’ I replied silently, grinning.

‘Next time, just trust me,’ it rolled its eyes and flew off, leaving me alone with my true love and mentor.

```

No matter how unknown or mysterious the future and the environment around me seemed, I ultimately learned to trust it and its intentions, whether good or bad. I became a serene sailboat, unhurriedly floating on destiny’s waves and faithfully veering towards fate’s winds. I was at peace with everybody and everything.

Learn to trust yourself in spite of how unconfident or insecure you are; you know more than you think you do.

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There. It's the end. Yunho is with Jaejoong and that is all that matters. Are they together? Yes and no. It's up to you. Did Seulgi die and then Yunho come back for Jaejoong? Maybe. Is Yunho still married? Maybe.

Really, it's an open ending that's up for any interpretation. I prefer to think of it as a realization for Jaejoong that his love for Yunho is all that counts, and that he should just trust himself that this is the right decision.

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Comments

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Artemis88 #1
Chapter 31: Beautiful story . Also quite inspiring and spreads hope and positivity . No matter what happens in your life , look around ,there's always another opportunity . Learn to accept failure or not doing your best as a normal part of life . Getting up ,acknowledging your situation , smiling in times of adversity , moving forward even when you're not sure where you're going is the secret of getting through life .

I also loved the little anecdotes you blended into your fic , like the one about the hermit crab . :)

Hats off !
CandyFreak #2
Chapter 31: Awesome! Amazing!
That's all I can say...@.@
jaexyong9597
#3
I read this story on winglin a few months ago, n this is one of my fave. I love all the metaphors you use here.
And I cried when I read some chapters. This isn't a tragic story but it makes my tears flow.
About the ending, I force myself to believe that Seulgi dies n Yunho comes to Jae because he realizes his feelings toward that ex-student of his. ^o^
mirokoi
#4
Oh, a thing I forgot to mention. I love the vibe words give out. It wasn't exactly modern and peppy, yet not quite that old and aged feeling. If I were to describe the vibe as an image, it would be in autumn, a large tree with rustic-coloured leaves, some fluttering in the breeze on the right. On the left, would be some white steps, where a couple is embracing, the smaller in the lao of the older.The ground is littered with leaves, but patches of green grass showing. That's what I see it (:
mirokoi
#5
Wow. This. Is truly a fascinating story. I read it from 8.30 until 11.30 (Now) and I really loved it. I especially loved the metaphors, the meaning, the life lessons in it. Beautifully written (Although I found a fistful of grammer mistakes. No harm though, still perfectly understandable) The ending was sweet, and I prefer to imagine Yunho still "happily" married, but still holding on to his love for Jaejoong, as Jaejoong had done. And Jaejoong would simply move on as a succesful doctor, always loving Yunho. Excuse my sappy mind.<br />
<br />
Question though. You mentioned in your earlier chapters that Jaejoong's piano teacher was called Choi Siwon, and later Heechul's boyfriend was Choi Siwon. Were they the same person? (I freaking hope not O__o) It was insignificant but it attacked my brain like a mofo. :P<br />
<br />
In any case, I love it. I'll reread it but now I have to shower as I am a wreck. Then get some sleep. Yeah.
ChiiryuJung
#6
Is it end yet??? no???<br />
How unusual story you have here ^^ And I couldnt believe you just 15? God..
ChiiryuJung
#7
So cute! how jae confess he in love with Professor JUng, LOL ^^<br />
How old Yunho is?<br />
I just read chp 9 tehee