Entry 5
Dear Diary, My First Love
12th April 2009A few days have passed. And I have yet to go back to the beach.I wonder if that boy has been waiting.Would he have been disappointed? .A liar, is that what he’ll see me as?...what am I even saying? Look at me, I’m already getting too ahead of myself here. I’m just a stranger to him. We’ve barely even seen each other. Yet here I am wondering if someone like him would even bother about whether I'll be there or not. Gosh, I think I've been stuck indoors for too long...but then again. it doesn't hurt to think about it right? I mean there's nothing else for me to in here anyways. And besides he does seem like quite an unpredictable one.
-2 days ago-
A few seconds to go before the clock struck four. The sky still mysteriously dark and the moonlight snaking its way through the thinnest of gaps of the curtains. Its ghostly glow shining upon the peaceful face of the vulnerable sleeping figure.
All was calm and quiet until a strong, alarming pulse violently drums the heart of the girl – without warning, loud, intense, and haphazard. The drumming of each pulse spreads all over her body, her back heating up in an instant and eyes immediately flies open. On impulse, weak hands shoots up, tightly clenching at her chest, desperately trying to hold back the pulses. The material of her clothing scrunched up. But the erratic pulses were still on a rapid increase.
Still clutching onto her chest, the girl weakly sits up with the support of one shaky arm. She unsteadily reaches towards her bedside table. Beads of sweat glistened on her forehead as her eyes, fighting to clench itself shut, were fixed on the small brown bottle which she could barely work out from the lack of light.
And with one strong swipe of a arm the forgotten glass of water beside the bottle was mercilessly knocked off.
A loud smash followed, shards of the glass along with its contents splattering everywhere.
But paying no heed to that, Eunmi had successfully grasped hold of the bottle and hurriedly unscrewed the cap off.
At that precise moment, the bedroom door flung opened and the lights were switched on, revealing a dishevelled Jinhee in her nightgown and slippers. Her face paled with worry.
“Oh gosh, Eunmi-ah”
Quickly running over to the younger girl’s aid, she skipped over bits of broken glass and made a swift grab for the water jug.
“Here drink some water”
Sitting herself at the edge of the bed, Jinhee supported Eunmi’s back with one arm and held the mouth of the jug in front of the girl’s lips, which she gratefully accepted as the tablet was too painfully dry to swallow on its own.
After a few gulps, Jinhee placed the jug aside and wrapped the younger girl in a motherly embrace, hoping for the haphazard heartbeats to subside quicker. And as the medication finally kicked in, she could feel the relief sink in as Eunmi’s breathing gradually calmed. The girl herself gradually fell back into her peaceful little slumber as well.
Jinhee carefully lays her down and pulls her blanket up. She gently the fragile young girl’s hair and watched as Eunmi snuggled into her pillow. Just like nothing had happened.
That little episode must have really tired me out because somehow I managed to sleep through the whole morning. Waking up just after twelve at noon, which is rare for me.Unnie had already called Kim Seonsaeng-nim and all lessons were cancelled for the day.Appa on the other hand, was of course kept well informed, which led to a long, long conversation over the phone. Well I say conversation but it was pretty much a one sided one with constant naggings and health related reminders on his end. But that’s appa for you. Ever so protective and worried. He even wanted to come back down from Seoul just to check up on me. Luckily I managed to calm him down and assured him that I’m perfectly fine in unnie’s care.Thankfully unnie just acted normally around me, unlike that worrywart appa of mine. After all these years, he should know better than to overreact to everything regarding me. But we are talking about my appa here, the one and only.And today, well it's time for another one of my once a month getaway day to the nearby city where I have specially scheduled checkups with Dr Lee. A good friend of my late umma and another person who loves to drill all these can do’s and can’t do’s in my head...I can already predict what she's gonna say.
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