S  e  h  u  n       &       J  o  n  g  i  n                                        

Jongin was constantly checking the time as he waited for Sehun, ready to have a great time at the club, as usual.

He was about to call him again when he saw the younger out of the door with black skinny jeans, a plain white v-neck shirt and a black leather jacket. Jongin agreed that black eyeliner would make Baekhyun –Kyungsoo's bestfriend– look potentially fine, but on Sehun, the black eyeliner worked like magic.

His friend looked noticeably hotter and ier than Baekhyun himself who has perfected the technique along the years.

He shook his head to make those thoughts fly away and he just decided to cooly fix his hair, start the van and make sure he looked good before Sehun took passenger’s seat and fastened his seatbelt.

The music wasn't the best of the night, it didn't seem nice at all from where Jongin observed one after another guy asking Sehun to dance. The younger had rejected all of them so far, he decided to dance alone until now.

But there was a guy who didn't wait for his answer, he just got closer and started to dance too close to Sehun, almost pressing his body against the younger’s who seemed to not mind it –was then when Jongin finished his shot in once and headed to where his friend was, pushing the guy away –taking his place close to Sehun.

His hands moved around Sehun’s waist while his hips seemed attracted by the younger’s warmth by inertia, he got closer to his neck –no matter how many people were in there, Sehun’s perfume was still the same on his clothes, his shoulder and his neck.

He breathed in his essence.

He turned Sehun around, meeting his surprised eyes and holding the look for a while before moving his lips dangerously close to his neck and leaving a kiss on the milky-white skin after pronouncing his name in a husky voice.

Sehun felt his legs getting weak, hearing his friend calling him with such a sensuality in his voice and feeling his breath against his wet skin, he couldn’t help but do the same –he let out Jongin's name in the other’s ear.

Jongin kissed him again, this time fully on the lips.

Sehun let him do what he wanted to, he would be ashamed to admit how many times he had dreamt with Jongin in even more compromising situations than a single kiss.

When they broke the contact, Jongin realized what he just did.

“I’m sorry, I think I’ve drank too much. I think we better go home now”

Babe, Sehun would spend the night in my house, we’re going there right now. I hope you have sweet dreams…I love you

He placed his phone inside his pocket and just waited for Sehun in the car. The younger offered himself to drive, after the kiss Jongin said he had drank too much and it wasn't smart to let him drive –but Jongin refused the offer, he said it was ok.

He assured Sehun he was better now and that he could perfectly drive the car since the ride wasn't long.

The ride back home isn't full of laughs and jokes as usually, the kiss caused in Sehun such a happiness that not even Jongin's arm around his waist or his breath against the back of neck that same night –while the older thought he was asleep– could make him forget.

A whisper in his ear after a few drinks. Jongin’s warm breaths against his neck slowly turned into soft and provocative kisses. 

The shameless way they danced and their bodies touched each other could bring any kind of thoughts to Sehun’s mind, Jongin still had a relationship with someone who could practically seem his older brother, someone who has always taken good care of him and has helped him with everything he needed. 

But not a single one of those thoughts could drag away from his mind how much he wanted Jongin, how badly he wished his friend’s fingers would travel along his skin and how long he has waited for his burning touches.

The older seemed to go in the same direction as him.

Sehun was taken aback by the suddenly slight pressure around his wrist while he was being hurriedly forced through the amount of bodies and smells, Jongin was guiding him to the nearest exit without even saying a word –maybe because the music was loud enough to turn into dead silence in the air his voice, or maybe because it wasn't needed anyway because he knew exactly where this situation was heading to.

The fresh air of the night outside didn't last long against his burning skin. Jongin almost forced him into his new Toyota Corolla and accompanied him on the back seat, closing the door behind.

The younger knew that even if they have shared a few shots of Tequila in the club, both of them were fully in their five sense –or at least their lack of conscience wasn't because of the alcohol. 

Jongin started by pressing his own lips hardly against his friend’s just to deepen the kiss asking for some entrance, Sehun has never denied him anything. His hands guided Sehun’s body closer –placing him on his lap– while caressing the skin under his shirt.

The younger’s arms closed around the other’s neck after removing his jacket and moving softly but desperately at the same time on his lap, successfully getting some friction between their crotches.

Jongin let out a low groan –enjoying the moment– in the process, moving his lips all over Sehun’s neck and back to his lips with insistence. He removed the latter’s shirt with less than patience right before removing his own. 

Sehun, on the other hand, had decided to let Jongin in charge –letting him just do whatever he wanted to do as a clear way to prove how much he actually wanted this and also not let him know about his lack of experience in the matter.

They both were already hard, completely taken by the heat of the moment.

The older supported him with his arms but lessened the speed.

Jongin observed him and tried to calm his own thoughts and desires by trying to breathe slower –Sehun was trying to decipher what was going on.

“This…is a mistake, Sehun” –he let out as he caressed the other's cheek– “I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done this to you, pushed you to this”

The younger was confused but understood what he should do at the momento. He moved away from his place, sitting beside Jongin and putting on his shirt. The other followed.

“I'll call a taxi”

“There is no need, I’ll take you. Just…” –Jongin thought for a moment– “just give me a few minutes, I’ll take a walk and I’ll be back in a moment. Please, don’t go, I don’t want you to take a taxi this late”

With that in mind he got out of the car, put on his jacket and started to walk. Sehun has never denied him a single thing, he decided to wait just as the other asked him to do, he got out of the car and decided to go for another drink in the club. He pressed his palms against the bar and asked for a drink to finish it in one.

“Are you ok?” –Sehun turned to the side, a guy a bit shorter than him smiled.

“I don’t really know, to be honest”

“Is it about love?” –Sehun slightly nodded– “Then that guy doesn't deserve you. Just look at you, I bet you’re still young and also very good looking. Who wouldn't want to date you?” –Sehun showed a small smile.

“My name is Kim Minseok”

“Oh Sehun”

“Well, Sehun, would you like something else to drink? It’s on me”

That night, Sehun ended up doing two things he never planned or even thought he would do: decline a few of Jongin’s calls on purpose and accept drinks from a stranger, even when it was just sodas.

Frustrated knocks on the cold wooden front door filled the small house and made Sehun wonder what the point of having an electric bell was or why people sometimes just ignored that it was a lot easier, simple –and of course a lot less stressing– push a small button to let him know someone was standing there.

As the sound got in his nerves he had to practically run downstairs –it was probably his nephew who had moved in just a few days ago and who apparently had the habit of forget things easily. He probably forgot the keys before going out.

He opened the door without even thinking about it, freely confident, but immediately regretted not peeking first to at least gift himself the chance to get rid of the uncomfortable visit that was his friend’s.

Jongin greeted with an innocent smile –that smile that more than just innocent, to the younger was totally captivating. Everything about Jongin captivated him without even trying to, or at least that was before he decided to forget the possibility of becoming something else to his best friend.

“Are you going out?” –Jongin asked, walking across the living room without even asking for any permission. Sehun turned around, ignoring the question and going back to his room –the other following behind.

“What do you want, Jongin?” –coldness filling his words as ice sinking in water.

“You don’t answer any of my calls or texts” –the older of two tried to see look into his eyes, without any success– “I would dare to say you’ve been ignoring me and avoiding me the whole time even at school…just like how you’re doing it right now, by the way”

“Fine, you’re already here, aren’t you?” –he placed his wristwatch in place– “How can I help you then?”

“You can start by answering my questions and it would be a lot better if you at least looked at me when I’m talking to you” –Sehun didn’t answer– “Who are you going out with?”

“Why? Do I need to ask for your permission or explain you what I do now?”

Jongin crossed the room until reaching Sehun’s phone.

“Where’s your nephew?” –Jongin unlocked the device and scrolled down the recent calls, a name was constant in the list, different days and hours: Kim Minseok.

“Yixing-hyung is staying with one of his classmates, they have to work on a project or something like that” –Sehun took off his jacket and threw it onto his desk char.

“Why do you keep calling him hyung? He’s your nephew”

“He’s older than me and I respect him a lot”

“Then you’ll be alone the whole night?” –Jongin now searched for the text messages. The most recent conversation was with Kim Minseok.

“Listen Jongin, I have plans, okay? I have no time for your games, they’re waiting for me”

“With whom? Kim Minseok?”

“What is wrong with you?!” –the younger took his own phone from Jongin’s hands.

“Who is Kim Minseok, Oh Sehun?”

“You don’t have the right to ask that, Jongin, and I don’t have to give you any explanation” –Sehun took his jacket and headed to the door but his friend cought his wrist in his hand, stopping him– “Let me go”

“Sehun, we need to talk”

“I have nothing to talk with you so just let me go, Minseok-hyung is waiting for me”

The words surprised the older to the point of letting go –for some strange reason, Sehun didn’t move.

“Are you dating?” –Sehun kept quiet before Jongin’s penetrating eyes– “Where did you meet him? How?”

“The other day in the club” –a short pause– “after what happened in your car”

Jongin understood what that meant: he had played with fire and got burnt. One way or another, he was the one who pushed Sehun to someone else.

He now regretted for not being honest since that very night, to stop himself before going further into the moment –he even regretted not realizing his true feelings before.

Because he isn’t dumb at all, he knows what he feels for Sehun isn’t only friendship.

“Sehun, about that-”

“It doesn’t matter, forget it. I have to go now, don’t forget to lock the door before you go”

And watching Sehun turning around once again, he understood he needed to do something about it or he will push the younger to someone else who was probably willing to take responsibility, once again.

Without even a word, he pressed his lips against the younger’s. He captured his face with his hands just to make sure Sehun wouldn’t run away –but he didn’t even tried to.

In matter of seconds, Jongin’s tongue was dancing along with Sehun’s in perfect sync and at a sensual rhythm.

His hands traveled down to Sehun’s neck, shoulders, back and finally his waist –the younger’s fingers tangling in his hair and pulling it carelessly but the feeling was raising his levels of pleasure.

During the kiss, he guided Sehun to the edge of the bed and made sure his back slowly met the mattress beneath. Jongin placed himself on top of the younger’s delicate body and stopped to look at him in the eyes while leaving short and chaste kisses on his lips.

Sehun then observed something in Jongin’s eyes that left his heart beating faster –this time it wasn’t only about lust, Jongin looked at him with a stronger and comforting feeling this time.

The younger then understood that wasn’t going to be his first time getting laid, that was going to be his first time making love.

Jongin slowly ed his shirt, leaving soft kisses on his bare chest, caressing evey inch of his body while he smiled at him like assuring him he was doing the right thing with the right person and it will be totally okay –he just needed to relax and enjoy.

And that was exactly what he did.

He pushed away the thought about what Kyungsoo would probably say if he knew about this or that Minseok was probably still waiting for him at the movies.

He decided to let go and enjoy.

He was addicted to the way Jongin whispered sweet thing, by his sinful lips, by the warm and satisfying feeling of the other inside of him and how good he was making him feel with evey and each one of his s and surely, Jongin also was addicted to the way Sehun almost screamed his name, lost in the indescribable pleasure he felt just by thinking that Sehun wanted him as much as he wanted the younger.

The younger simply let go during the satisfying amount of times they did it in the same night –just to wake up to a cloudy morning next day, on an empty bed and an uncomfortable feeling in his lower back.

The smell of pancakes and bacon filled the room and for a moment he imagined Jongin there, standing in the kitchen and making breakfast.

He slowly went downstairs and headed to the kitchen.

“Good morning, Sehun” –Yixing flipped a pancake to make sure it wasn’t burned– “Breakfast is almost ready”

“Good morning, hyung” –he thought of the best way to continue– “Have you seen Jongin?”

“Your friend?” –Sehun nodded– “He left really quickly like a half an hour ago, I told him he should stay and have breakfast but he didn’t”

Sehun’s phone went off in his hand, he had a few call from Minseok and a new text message from Jongin. He decided to read the message first, he will call Minseok after breakfast.

Sehun-ah, I want you to know that what we did last night was wonderful –a slight smile from Sehun– but I honestly think it was a mistake, I still have a relationship with Soo and I’m not completely sure how I feel about you. Please, forgive me

Tears rolled from Sehun’s eyes at the same time the first raindrops silenced the spring.

A few days later, Jongin decided to make another mistake by skipping his last class to wait for Sehun, he was sure he was going to fail the class anyway.

“Sehun-ah” –the younger was only a few stpes away but didn’t answer– “Sehun we need to talk” –he held him by the wrist.

“I don’t think we have something to talk about, Jongin” –the younger released himself.

A red car sopped, the driver waved to Sehun and the younger smiled and waved back.

“Is that Xiumin?” –Jongin asked– “Sehun, you’re dating that guy?”

“Listen Jongin, listen to me carefully because I have no intentions to repeat it later: leave me alone” –Sehun looked right into his eyes, Jongin realized how big of a scar he left in his friend– “Haven’t you learnt to not trip twice with the same rock? Stop making mistakes because of me only to regret later and save me another pain, would you?”

And then Sehun walked away. Once again, Jongin pushed him to someone else and this time, he wasn’t sure if the younger would ever come back to him.

Jongin considered it was all his fault, Kyungsoo didn’t deserve someone that cheated on him with someone he considered a younger brother –the truth is, Jongin was willing to keep tripping with the same rock as many times as needed.

Because to him, Sehun worth it all.

He scrolled down his phone screen until reaching the one he was looking for and then dialed the number.

“Soo, where are you? We need to talk”

Jongin started the talk mentioning how important the older was to him since long time ago, why he always took care of him since middle school and also how happy he was when he finally got the guts to ask him out almost a year ago and Kyungsoo said yes.

He started like trying to soften the real purpose of the conversation itself.

In the end, he decided to be brutally clear and honest: I cheated on you –he finally said.

“Soo, you don’t deserve this” –his voice in a serious tone this time– “I still have to figure out my feelings for Sehun but I know you don’t feel for me the same way I used to feel for you”

“Jongin, I love you-”

“I don’t’ doubt that, probably as a friend, as a younger brother, but never as your boyfriend” –he smiled– “And I don’t blame you, maybe we weren’t meant to be. I love you, too…as a brother”

He left a kiss on his head, soft and slow, just pressing his lips for short seconds before stepping away and smile sincerely –ready to turn around, his hands into his pockets and walk to the door.

“Jongin” –Kyungsoo called with a smile– “you should tell him, I know he would like to know. I knew it a while ago” –the younger nodded before exit the place.

Indeed, it was exactly what he wanted to do.

Unfortunately, Sehun didn’t allow him to do so.

His friend would keep avoiding him everywhere and ignoring his calls and text messages –apparently the voice messages neither worked.

But Jongin wasn’t the kind of guy who would just give up and forget about it. At this point it was almost exasperating but giving up wasn’t an option.

Kyungsoo helped him though, as much as he could. He texted him the address of the restaurant where Sehun was heading that night, accompanied by Minseok but Jongin couldn’t care less about it.

He met Sehun right at the entrance and had to hold him by the arm to talk –the younger didn’t even look at him in the eyes the whole time.

“I told Soo the truth” –he confessed, his voice dragging desperation in it.

“That’s great, if it makes you feel better” –was the younger’s cold answer– “You know hyung didn’t deserve it”

“Sehun, I love you” –he said after not thinking too much about it.

“Good, but it’s too late for you to realize that, don’t you think?”

And then the younger started to walk away.

“I will never give up on you, Sehun. I’ll wait for you no matter how long it takes for you to trust me again” –Jongin said, clearly out loud, and the words almost made Sehun to stop in his place– “I promise”