Winter Days

The air outside is crisp and searing, grating against Youngjae's skin brutally. He exhales a thankful sigh upon reaching his apartment. Getting snow onto his floor when he enters, he holds the door open for the two new occupants of the house.

Daehyun looks uncertainly from Youngjae's welcoming eyes to his grimy self, while Junhong tiptoes in when Youngjae beckons him to. After persistent coaxing from the nurse and recurring bows, Daehyun finally shuffles in and stations himself in a corner.

“I'm sorry it's not much,” the nurse says while glancing around his plainly funished house. Daehyun turns flustered.

“No, no, it's a great place,” he blurts out. "Thank you so much."

Junhong tugs on Daehyun's jeans and gazes around in utmost wonderment. Youngjae thinks fleetingly how long it must have been for them to step foot in a proper home.

Youngjae leads them to the bathroom and convinces Daehyun that it's fine to hand him his soiled clothes. Junhong is absolutely ecstatic to be bathing and his sudden exclamations during his shower leads him to choke on the running water. Youngjae can hear Daehyun lightly scolding the boy while he dumps the duo's clothes into the washing machine, igniting a chuckle in him.

There's something at the back of his mind, questioning his choices and underscoring the fact he lives in a city overflowing with hoaxes. But there's also the plethora of warmth, unfamiliar in the icy season, flowing through him that encourages him not to change his mind.

Picking out a set of his clothes for Daehyun, he realises he doesn't have any that can fit Junhong. He hands over the garments to Daehyun first and Daehyun emerges with a mirthful Junhong wrapped up in a towel. Youngjae steers the child into his room, draping the smallest of his shirts over him. He pins up the rim of his shorts and puts them on for Junhong, all the while giggling with the boy. Daehyun looms behind them with a light grin.

Youngjae shows them to his guest room, abandoned after his parents' and friends' visits dwindled. Junhong nearly trips while energetically lunging for the bed. It takes a while for Daehyun to pry him off the mattress, but once he does, Junhong instantaneously pounces on Youngjae. Junhong's dazzling smile reminds him so much of the radiant sun.

After Junhong is lulled to sleep, the remaining pair gather in the living room.

“Thank you,” Daehyun exhales for what Youngjae believes is the hundredth time tonight.

“Really, thank you,” Daehyun reiterates while tracing the fringe of his shirt. “I promise I'll find a job and repay you for everything you've done for us. Thank you.”

Daehyun's pupils are of a peculiar shade. It isn't the colour, Youngjae notices while sending him a smile; it's some form of haze clouding his eyes, giving off the impression his eyes are a tinge of blue. The nurse bids Daehyun good night and turns into his bed. His blanket is still damp from the tears he had shed this morning, over a lively boy who left and took a part of Youngjae with him.

"Hyung, if I go, promise me you won't be sad."

His house feels much more alive today.