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Sehun POV

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“KAI YOU’RE TRULY A BIG JERK!”

Sehun furrowed his eyebrows, eyeing the loud screech seeped from the ceiling. Obviously, Luhan voice was always be the best in irrational whining or loud scream. What’s their problem now? He said mentally, before he sighed into his warm milk tea, knowing that if he went upstairs to take a look, he’ll probably see something he would regret. That’s why he stayed in their spacious living room and continued watching TV, tried to create a peaceful surrounding around himself after the series of disaster he had to witness today.

He simply prayed the day would be over as soon as possible. He tried to lighten the mood especially in between Kyungsoo and him. He thought, they would be freshened up after a hot shower together and rinsed away the uncomfortable strain they put in their mind. He did make Kyungsoo smiled contently after they kissed and touched each other until they were hard, aroused and for awhile they stilled to feel the strongest urge to make love, to mark each bodies with their obsessive love.

No sweet words escaped their lips as they made their way to bed and pressed their bodies as close as possible. Sehun heart fluttered when he ran his hand on Kyungsoo stomach, trailed down and found the manhood he knew so well, at his every brush and caress he proudly presented the most beautiful moan from his lover. It’s not girly and high pitched like what they saw in , it’s not annoyingly sweet like they used to overheard from their bestfriend's. Kyungsoo moan was low and gruffly yet it never failed to tease back Sehun with intoxicating flame of desire.

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‘I've never had a time to say sorry…’

Sehun knew they were too high to sober up and he did curse himself for blurting out his apologize, but he said it anyway and practically cooling down the heated atmosphere in between them.

‘For what?’

Kyungsoo tensed because of his words, and Sehun could smell trouble from it. So he sighed and brushed his thumb over Kyungsoo face, in hope he could make Kyungsoo less alarmed with his words, ‘I made you cry, Kyungsoo.’ Now he admitted it, his heart clenched so hard he needed to gasp the air so his body won’t get trembled in guilt, ‘and to make it worse, I just let you be.’

As he kept repeating his regret, he started feel bored with himself he wonder if Kyungsoo would just answer with, it’s okay, I’m fine now, as if it’s not hurting Sehun back cause the words had power to put an invisible barrier in between their hearts and created room for secrets that shouldn’t be there if they were in love and they were lovers.

‘So what, then?’

What came out from Kyungsoo mouth wasn’t a lie, but it’s still so painful to hear. Now Kyungsoo sat up and break off the nest of their body heat and hissed at him, ‘you hurt me, I hurt you, yet I’m still stuck with you and you still tightly claim me as yours!’

His words lit fire inside Sehun, ‘how could you say that?!’ Do you want to say, being mine was a burden to you? Sehun mentally snarled. He felt nauseous as he kept repeating Kyungsoo’s words inside his head. What’s happen in Kyungsoo’s mind? What the brunette really wanted? If being claimed didn’t give enough proof that Sehun loved Kyungsoo, not Luhan, then what’s the meaning of the years they passed as together? Was that just a dream placed in reality?

‘Is it about Luhan?’ Sehun asked and Kyungsoo grunted in displease so the blond grabbed both his lover shoulders for attention, ‘look at me. I know you’re jealous, that’s why I apologize to you. I know it won’t lessen the pain but at least you know how your feeling is the most important thing for me!’

‘I don’t want to be treated like that!’ Surprisingly, Kyungsoo pushed away Sehun, who could only stunned into a statue when the oldest hissing at him with rage, ‘I’m not weak nor I’m fragile, and I hate it when you tried to pamper me like I’m a girl. It feels like you saw me as Luhan.’ It’s not true, Sehun denied, but now he knew why it was so hard to reach Kyungsoo’s heart. Misunderstanding in between them, it’s not simply because Kyungsoo thought he loved Luhan in romance way. It’s not only because he cared too much with Luhan’s life.

‘I never see you as Luhan.’ Sehun tried to touch Kyungsoo but the boy flinched and with that he froze, feeling even worse than before. What should I do now? he said to himself while eyeing Kyungsoo,  the fear was rooted deep inside the brunette mind, even with all his might, he doubt everything will back to before, where their love still so pure and they had no thought aside making each other smiled and laughed in happiness.

‘I’m hungryyyyy…. someone help meeeeeeeee……..’

Luhan mourn hitting their bedroom door, followed by annoying knock which made Sehun grumbled lowly, tried not to yell at Luhan stupidity as he stood to get his shirt and a short pants. He eyed his lover. Usually, Kyungsoo will walk out to help him calming Luhan down, but tonight he saw how Kyungsoo ignored their blond friend and curled under the blanket instead.

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“I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you…”

Sehun startled from his thought, when he heard familiar nasty sound of kiss in between weak curses and he had a bad feeling that if he turned he would see Luhan and Kai in the middle of their dramatic , and he guessed it right when he catch a glimpse of a playboy undershirt fell to the floor. He told himself not to turn, but he did it anyway, out of curiosity, and faced a red thong thrown at his arm chair.

Never in his life before Sehun wanted to die this badly.

He stood up with disgust, didn’t even want to ask who the owner was, he knew the big possibility was Luhan but who knows? Kai and Luhan love life was too risky for anyone else to see. They used to be insane when it came to satisfy their lust and giving Sehun a mental image of Kai using stripper-thong made his milk tea tasted like mud.

“What’s wrong with you guys?!”

Sehun attention averted to Kyungsoo, who looked like could kill a beast with his irritated gaze as the oldest stomped his way downstairs. The brunette probably awakened from the loud noise and everyone knew well Kyungsoo was their Fairy God Mother as long as no one woke him up abruptly from sleep. He’ll start shouting and throwing things and probably clawing Luhan and Kai, Sehun didn’t want Kyungsoo get near them especially when they’re in heat. It never happened before but what if they saw Kyungsoo attack on them as an invitation for . That'll be the worst nightmare, ever.

“Kyungie…” Sehun immediately catch Kyungsoo and brought him to sit on the couch, keep holding him while whispering, “Kyungie, hey, do you want to watch TV? There’s Pacific Rim…” he reached the TV remote and turned up the volume just so their background song changed from, ‘ah, not there.. not there... uhh, you’re so naughty, Kai…’ into a better original soundtrack.

Sehun sighed when Kyungsoo relaxed into his arms. “I’m sorry.” He knew he was repeating the same pattern of mistake but he can’t really help it. No matter how manly or strong or tough Kyungsoo was, it didn’t change the fact that this black haired young man was his precious lover, “I know it’s unfair to you if I care Luhan too much, but please understand, because you’re also a man. We’re not created to have feeling, but when we fall in love, we turned blind and deaf to the world, could only see the one we love and could only hear the voice of love returned to us…” It might be not a good time to tell, but Sehun was tired with the depressing mood around them and he really need to put a stop on it.

There’s no answer. Yet there’s also no sign Kyungsoo would leave. Only when Sehun tried to look into the brunette eyes, the eyes blinked and stared back at him. He couldn’t read the expression but he felt an urge to cry when he looked into the depth of his lover’s gaze. It’s not empty like before, it’s full with swirls of emotion which made his mouth opened, explained more for things he didn’t even understand anymore. He only wanted to convince Kyungsoo, only wanted to break in and planted his words right into Kyungsoo’s mind.

‘I love you.’

‘Only you.’

“But Sehun,” Kyungsoo muttered back at him, “you only love me cause I’m around…” the words was just like the flood of water breaking the thick wall of his heart, since both of them knew it was true. Their love happened because they met and they became friends.

“That doesn’t mean I will love you less…” Sehun cupped Kyungsoo face as he hissed every single words firmly. Their love was a condition but it’s also not wrong to love someone that way. “You’re still the one I hold, still became the one I kiss and will be the only one I’ve shared my heart with.” ,

“You were so selfish.” Kyungsoo said bitterly, “Do you know what kind of love I had for you? It’s everything, my love for you means you are my world, yet you…”

Suddenly Sehun felt angry, so angry that he gritted his teeth as answer, “don’t you be the selfish one too, Kyungsoo?!” he didn’t even realized his voice rose, “you loved me for price.”

“Of course I want you to love me back! What’s the point of all your kindness and all your time spent with me if you’re not suffered without me.” Kyungsoo grabbed Sehun’s front shirt as the brunette growled, “just like you owned the whole me, I want to own you too, Sehun, and make you understand, you need me just like I can’t live without you.”

Silence passed in between them as Sehun realized, that’s what he missed. Kyungsoo’s hesitation over his love, it’s not just nonsense. Kyungsoo’s insecurity with the friendship he had in between Luhan, it’s reasonable. Just like how he claimed Kyungsoo to be his, forever, the brunette had every right to do the same with him because that’s the meaning of their love. They started it with bonds, yet it was unfair if it’s not both of them taken as each other’s possession.

“Then make me yours.”

Sehun kissed the brunette on the lips, “claim me, just like what I did to you,” he didn’t know what part of his words that make Kyungsoo blushed in red but he sli “but I had a feeling since I love you this much, you can’t claim me more than now…”

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None of them remembered why their lips locked in a deep kiss or why they suffocated themselves with a tight hug. However, they knew this was a bridge to re-connect their heart again so they kissed and touched each other as much as they could to cure the pain of their own words, of their own fault.

“I love you …”

What a simple, mainstream words to have such a big influence to someone’s life.

It made Kyungsoo wanted to cry, now admitting that he was a ing hypocrite. Torturing the man he loved with harsh words of denial, said he hated it to be spoiled with sweet and fluffy love. Yet here he was, melting into the poodle of shame at every love inhaled from Sehun’s breath and at every praises kissed his skin. It made him angry because he loved it. He enjoyed it, and deep in his heart the brunette already knew Sehun will only love him. He’s just stupid, blind and stubborn to realize it before.

“I’m sorry Sehun…” he sobbed, when Sehun didn’t have intention to stop infused love into him, it became unbearable to breathe and it was hard to stop his body trembled in a blissful pain.

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Sehun pecked the tip of Kyungsoo nose yet remained silent. Sweet and comforting words arranged into his mind but he realized if he just said it out, it won’t make difference. Tonight, he will win Kyungsoo heart and will gain a little bit more trust than before, but it’s no use if he couldn’t completely erase the wary in his lover’s head.

“Kyungsoo, can I ask one question?” Sehun whispered as his gaze fixed at the doll eyes and waited until Kyungsoo focused on him before he continued speaking, “do you know who I am?”

Sehun could see how Kyungsoo froze, confused to find the meaning behind his words. Surprisingly, such an easy question became difficult problem for Kyungsoo because he always scared to face the reality, scared to hurt other people and the worst, he was scared to share his feeling. That’s why Sehun cupped the brunette face and let their lips touched,

“Then let me tell you and you better listen carefully.” Sehun said firmly, “I’m your lover, and you are mine. We’re already together for eleven years and I’ll make sure we’ll still be for more years in the future...” his fingers dug into Kyungsoo cheeks when he saw tears falling on Kyungsoo face again, “so please stop torturing yourself with worry…” he smiled not when Kyungsoo gasped a cry, but at the understanding nod given to him,

“And believe me when I say my love was only for you.”

He chuckled at seeing how Kyungsoo get choked from too much crying and made the throat disable to form words. But he knew their time to argue was over so he opened his t-shirt and said, “hey Kyungie,” He kissed his lover gently, “ how about we make love here?”

“H-Huh?!” apparently Kyungsoo was still so proper that even after being teased in bathroom and bed, there’s still refusal in those round eyes to enter the world of exhibitionist , “H-here?! But…” The eyes s to the side where their friends occupied the kitchen, “but… but what if they saw us?!”

Sehun shrugged, saying good bye to his rationality as he pushed Kyungsoo flat to the couch, “I don’t care.” He said while pulling down Kyungsoo’s pants in such an expert movement, “I decided, I won’t hold back anymore. From now on, I will do you and molest you wherever or whenever I want.” The moment he saw dreadful expression on Kyungsoo, he shouldn’t smirk cause it will only make Kyungsoo dreaded even more. But he was done playing nice so he put a bit force to spread open his lover legs and then positioned his body in between.

“Sehun, please…” Kyungsoo tried to cover his crotch from the air, “if you do this to punish me…”

“You know what I hate?” Sehun grabbed the brunette jaw and whispered lowly, “negative thought, so unless you’re prepared to be punished severely, shut up and enjoy it…” And with that he drove in, carefully fit his length into Kyungsoo. The entrance was nicely prepared for penetration but it still made Kyungsoo arched his back, whimpered as the inner muscles strectched opened to give a room for Sehun.

“Ah, so big…”

That was probably the main reason why Kyungsoo hated doing it in public. This brunette tended to unconsciously during and ruined his image which had been built for years. However, the unique vocal and innocent blurt also made Sehun found his confidence when he already settled deep inside Kyungsoo. He asked from his gaze, making sure the older feel him and felt good because of him.

“No-…!”

Kyungsoo grumbled in protest when Sehun pushed deeper to create friction, but then, the sound turned into delicious whimper as he pulled out half and then back the whole in, rocked Kyungsoo forward and rewarded him with a hoarse scream.

Tonight, they forgot where they were and let their bodies bend in every possible position, at every place they wanted. Didn’t care if they stained the coffee table with the mix of their love potions, or if they shouldn’t humping on the big LED screen which still playing the unwatched movie. But when love was in the air, norms always forced to stay away so nothing could interfere their moment until their thirsts healed and their desire fulfilled.

“I love you Sehun…”

Kyungsoo said when he laid by his chest pressed to the rug, his body turned limp and sore but the eyes finally found a peace.

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Tbc