Seeing myself for the first time in a while

I Can't Love Anymore

Xiumin and I looked at him with raised brows.

"Hey! I'm y, okay!" Kris yelled.

"Are you for real?" Xiumin sighed heavily.

"Well it is a new school year so first impressions are extremely important." Kris turned to look at us.

"First impressions? They're the same classmates from last year!" I rolled my eyes.

"So? Does that really matter?" Kris raised a brow.

"Yes?" I answered in a questioning tone.

"Stop bickering you two," Xiumin sighed and stood up,"I'm cooking dinner now."

Immediately the two of us quietened down.

I sure can wait for the first day of school. Yep, not really lookin' forward to it at all. Really. Wait. What was I saying again? Oh yeah, so tonight, I'll be sleeping early because well... YOLO right? And it should be a good day tomorrow. Hopefully. :)

-Luhan

~End of entry~

I closed the diary quietly and just stared at it blankly.

Wow, I could never have known that they lived so peacefully like that. Well until today of course. They do seem to have a close relationship amongst one another. I just dont believe that these men are bad people. Its as though im trying to convince myself that they're normal people.

"Stop saying stupid things! If they kidnapped you for ransom they would'nt be good then would they?" I hit my head gently to knock some sense into myself.

Although Luhan was not someone I should sympathize with, why do I feel so bad for him? This wierd feeling has been in my chest ever since Tao told me about Luhan's past.

Is it because his first love just walked out of his life and got married to another? Is that why I pitied him? Or is it because a teenage boy who was just getting to know how love feels turned out like how he is now?

I was about to make more theories when the door slammed open. I jumped in my seat ad quickly hid the diary behind my back.

"Hey," Tao barged in,"I came to send some towels so you can shower. Unless you require some assistance because of your ankle injury." he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

I made a face. Gross. "No thank you. I can manage on my own."

Tao shrugged and mumbled a casual,"Oh well." before leaving the towels by my bed and left.

After a quiet 5 minutes of me deciding what I should do, I slowly got up and decided to shower. Grabbing the towels Tao had left me, I limped my way into the bathroom that according to Luhan, was big. And I kid you not, the bathroom was so big that you could actually host a party for 3 elephants and still have room to invite Exo M to join in the fun.

I glanced around the pastel coloured room in absolute awe when I made eye contact with someone. 

"I-is that me?" I reached to touch the person as they copied the same gesture I did.

When my shaking fingers made contact with a cold surface, I realised that I was right. That person looking back at me was actually me. My long chestnut brown hair was greasy and unruly. My once ivory complexion was pale and small cuts and bruises had decorated it. Touching my face, I felt as if I was going crazy, refusing to believe that the woman in the mirror was me as of now. I rushed towards the bathtub. I didnt want to look at myself, at least not when I look like a skeleton. 

I turned the tap on and waited as clear warm water rushed into the tub. After it was filled I slowly stripped off my dirty clothes and stepped in, the warm temperature immediately calmed my nerves. It had been so long since I last stepped into a shower so I tried to enjoy the warm water as best as I could. I grabbed some soap and shampoo nearby and my clean freak side immediately took charge.

After my bath I wrapped a towel around my body when I face palmed. I have no other clothes except the one I was wearing! But those are dirty. No way will I put them on. I sighed before waddling back into my room and stood by the room door. 

"I can't go out like this! Its too embarrassing!" I whispered, drying my hair with a hair towel.

I decided to take the risk and peeked my head into the corridoor. 

Oh? Is that Lay? I saw Lay's back that had just past my room, heading downstairs so I called out to him.

"Huh? Oh Gaeul. What is it?" he waslked back to me. I was in a bit of an uncomfortable position since I trying to hide my body by only peeking my head through the small crack of the door.

"I uhh... Don't have clothes to change into..." I sheepishly laughed.

"Oh you can borrow my clothes!" Lay smiled before dashing down the hall and into his room.

Soon he came back with a pair of pants and a plain black tshirt.

I wasnt gonna complain seeing the awkward position I was in so I accepted graciously.

After changing into the shirt and pants, I found them abit baggy but either way I wouldnt mind. It wasnt too big so it fit me just right.

Now I guess I have to sit here the whole day.

oxoxoxoxoxoxo

A/N: OMG GUYS IM SO SORRY T.T I havent updated in like... FOREVER. I'm so very sorry. No excuses. I will try to update more often but maybe on a schedule since school has just started for me. :)

Alrighties guys, as usual, thanks for reading! 

Comment juseyo and subscribe! 

Lots x Love

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Hey guys! The first chapter will be out tomorrow(hopefully)! Please look forward to it!~

Comments

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MonkeyDWriter #1
Chapter 12: Lol, I would read Adventure stories but a diary is interesting enough XD
MonkeyDWriter #2
Chapter 11: ^_^ Keep it comin' sister ^_^ I wonder if she'll ever be free? :/
MonkeyDWriter #3
Chapter 10: XD Hurry and update! 'Nuff said
Soffiya #4
Chapter 9: I really enjoy your fanfic