If anyone thinks after the not-a-love-confession from Jongin that Kyungsoo will spend the rest of her holidays moping, they’re dead, hit by a scooter, wrong. No, she refuses to do that. She might be small, or as she prefers to call it – petite, she’s mentally strong. She doesn’t cry when she misses home, she hardly drop a tear when her last relationship ended, so how can she mope around for something that wasn’t there in the first place.

It’s just a mere coincidence, she insists, that the day after the girls visited, and after the surprise from seeing Joonmyun leave Kris’s room early in the morning subsides, that she stays in her room all day listening to all the sad love songs she has on her playlist. Yes, just a coincidence.

When it’s getting dark outside and she sees the streetlights switching on, a knock on her door stops her from singing her heart out along with K.Will. Her encore worthy performance will have to wait and she keeps quiet; hoping that whoever is on the other side of the door will get the hint that she doesn’t want to be disturbed or require any listeners.

But unfortunately, whoever is on the other side is Sehun, and he can never take a hint or even have the audacity to actually wait for a reply because that’s what polite people do after knocking, as he opens the door and casually enters, uncaring that she could have been in the middle of changing.

She's not, but manners.

“Why are you already wearing pyjamas noona?” he says, as he flops down next to her on the bed, “Or is that from last night?”

“Why are you here?” she asks back, ignoring his question because it’s not worth using her vocal cords for.

He shrugs, and as if he just hears the song playing in the background he asks, “What song is this? Is it your favourite boy band?”

Kyungsoo shakes her head, as she shoots Sehun a judging look. How can he not recognise K.Will’s song?

“What are they called again?” he prods, eyebrows furrowed in thought, “EXO?”

This time Kyungsoo doesn’t hold herself back and hits Sehun lightly on the shoulder, “Not EXO, stupid,” what a preposterous mistake, “It’s ENDO!”

Sehun rubs at where Kyungsoo hit him, looking at her in shock, it isn’t the first time she hits him but it still surprises him each time, “What’s that for?”

“No one makes fun of my boys!” she hisses, although she can never look very threatening. Curse her unbelievably adorable and cute face.

Sehun laughs, happy that he manages to press the right button to piss her off but to be safe and because he still can't cook for himself, he admits, “Okay, okay I’m sorry. They’re perfect boys.”

She smiles instantly, forgetting that she was about to kick him out her room, “Good. Now if you can be just like them, I’ll love you even more.”

Sehun chuckles softly then, blushing a little because his favourite noona in the whole wide apartment has just complimented him and is even his hair as if he’s her pet. If he's a cat, he'd purr.

Just as the song changes to another ballad and while she’s still Sehun’s blonde for-the-week hair, her bedroom door opens, this time without warning. Apparently the word manner isn't in the house's dictionary.

“Hyung!” Sehun greets once Jongin appears behind the door, “Come cheer noona up. She’s upset.”

Kyungsoo blushes, even redder than Sehun earlier.

One because Jongin’s there in her room and she’s still in her pyjamas. Embarrassing. Two because as soon as Jongin sees the two of them lying side by side, in a matter of seconds, he’d teleport if he could, he jumps on the bed, squeezing himself in between Sehun and Kyungsoo, effectively stopping her from petting the other boy further.

“Why are you upset?” he asks once he’s settled comfortably, craning his neck to look at her.

It’s then what Sehun had said earlier sinks in. She smiles slightly as she realises that despite all the teasing, he did notice her distress. She’ll have to take him out for bubble tea one of these days.

Jongin is still waiting for an answer, as he doesn’t let his eyes stray away from her. She visibly gulps. She wants to say it’s you. I’m upset because of you. But she can’t, can she? So she puts on her brave smile and answers, “Nothing. I’m not upset.”

To her disappointment, they seem to believe her and don’t prod any further. Might as well give her an Oscar.

Then for the next half an hour or so, she can’t be sure; the three of them lie on the bed talking about their day. Well to be exact, Sehun and Jongin talking about their day, there’s not much to say about Kyungsoo’s. The sad songs still playing on her speaker serve as a soundtrack of sorts despite the mood clash.

She tries to keep her heart still when Jongin slides closer to her, stating he doesn’t want to be lying so close to Sehun as his reason. They’re practically sharing a pillow and she can feel his breath on her cheek whenever he turns around to look at her.

She doesn’t move much, doesn’t really want to, frozen in place despite the warmth coming from the body close to her. By then, she isn't paying much attention to whatever Sehun is saying anymore. Who cares what colour he dyes his hair next? Definitely not Kyungsoo.

Sehun's monologue is only interrupted when the last of her housemate crashes into the mini party, grumbling “Hey! Why aren’t I invited?”

And just when she thought three adults is the maximum number her bed can support or even fit for that matter, she’s proven wrong as Kris scoots himself in on Kyungsoo’s other side, pushing her further into the bed, until her back is lying flat on Jongin’s chest.

She apologizes profusely to him when the top of her head accidentally hits his chin and then she screams profanities at Kris politely –if that’s possible because Jongin’s on her face and she has to at least keep her cool, but the latter just smiles and wraps his arms around her waist when she struggles to lie back down on the little space that is left between the two men.

“Hyung, did you just arrive?” Jongin asks, his breath sending shivers to Kyungsoo again, “What took you so long?”

Kyungsoo wants to turn to look at Kris because it’s a habit of hers to look at someone when they’re talking, but in her current state, it’s difficult for her to do so. If she does, there’s a chance, though miniscule, that Jongin’s lips might brush hers because they're that close.

But as the saying goes, ‘yolo,’ right? You-only-lie-onyourcrush’schestonce.

And Kyungsoo is an opportunist, so she turns. But to her major disappointment, it doesn’t happen. What a shame (-less girl).

“Yes I did. I had a lot of work to do,” Kris answers, “But I was also held up by the girls across the hallway.”

At the mention of the girls, Kyungsoo can imagine Sehun’s face lighting up. She can turn to see it herself but why would she want to give Jongin the personal space he deserves and probably wants?

“You mean Luhan and Yixing noona?” he asks, even though there aren’t any other girls living in the apartment on the same floor as them.

Kris nods, “Yes. They invited us to join them for dinner later actually.”

Sehun sits up excitedly at that, smiling widely, “Really?”

Mimicking Sehun’s action, Kris sits up too, leaving Kyungsoo and Jongin the only ones lying down on the bed, “Yes, really. In fact, we probably should get ready soon,” he turns to look down at Kyungsoo, “That means you too. You don’t want them seeing you in your pyjamas right?”

Sehun chuckles, waving his hand back and forth in front of his face before running out of the room, followed by Kris.

Kyungsoo curses mentally, does she smell? She never thought of that.

Panicking but as slowly as she possibly can, she pulls her body away from Jongin, who curiously isn’t as much in a hurry to leave as the other two guys.

When she finally isn’t lying on his chest anymore, she breathes out a relief, hopefully if she does smell, which she doubts to be honest but just in case, Jongin won't be able to smell it.

He remains still as Kyungsoo lies on his side, looking at the ceiling, eyes unfocused as if he’s thinking about something.

But not long after, she’s caught by surprise when Jongin pulls her back in suddenly, this time chest to chest. Her eyes open wide in shock. From the way her skin tingles every few seconds, she knows he’s still breathing and therefore not holding his breath. She can safely say that even if she smells, Jongin doesn’t mind it. Huzzah!

She only hope Jongin won’t be able to feel the excess heat radiating from her face. At least he’s unable to see the redness that she’s sure is there. How would she be able to explain it?

“Kyungsoo, are you sure you’re okay?” he asks after a few moment of silence, “If even Sehun can tell, that means it’s obvious enough.”

She laughs into his chest at the indirect insult to their youngest roommate before answering truthfully, “Yes I was upset. But it’s okay now, you guys made me feel better.”

Kyungsoo can feel the vibration underneath her as he snickers, “Even Kris hyung?”

Again Kyungsoo laughs, burying herself further in the crook of his neck because it’s nice and warm and smells like Jongin. And oh, she doesn’t even care if she smells anymore.

She likes it like this, the two of them poking fun at Sehun and Kris. It’s one thing out of a number that they have in common. It makes her believe that she has a chance. That there’s still hope.

“Okay let’s go!” he says suddenly, gently pushing her away as he stands up, “I can’t wait to see Luhan noona!”

And then he goes ruining everyone’s efforts, as all she sees is green.

--

Luhan is one of those girls every girl wants to be and every guy desires, Kyungsoo included, ‘the want to be’ part of course. She’s tall and adding to the very feminine look she has, makes her the perfect specimen for a model.

And to Kyungsoo’s envy, she actually is. Even worse, there’re two of them in the building. Yixing is a model too, though less popular but with her humble and kind personality, she’s well loved too.

Now before you think that Kyungsoo hates these girls, stop right there. She adores them to bits and is actually quite close with them despite the short time Kyungsoo’s lived there.

It’s just she wishes she could be like them sometimes.

Kyungsoo and the boys however rarely get to see them as they travel a lot. From one runway to another, Milan to Paris they go. So when they’re actually back home, they try to spend time together. The dinner invitation isn’t anything new.

An hour after Jongin left and when she thinks she’s presentable enough, she stopped trying hard to be on the same level as them long ago, she leaves her room.

To her surprise, Jongin is sitting on the couch playing on his phone. And here she thought everyone would have left already.

“Where’s the others?” she asks, even though the answer is obvious.

He stands up, blinking a few times as he looks at her, before answering, “They went next door already.”

She blinks back a few times, a sight to see to be honest and says, “Why didn’t you go with them?”

He smiles shyly as he walks towards her and takes her hand, “Because I want to go with you, come on.”

When Luhan opens the door, if she sees Kyungsoo’s scarlet cheeks, she doesn’t show it as she screams, “Kyungsoo! I’ve missed you!”

She grins happily and hugs her back. From where she’s standing by the door, she can see a flustered Yixing waving at her from where she’s perched in between Sehun and Kris, who are no doubt asking about her latest show.

When Luhan lets go, she reaches out for Jongin and Kyungsoo automatically looks away.

If only she can stop her hearing at will too.

“Noona! I’ve missed you!” he says, voice slightly muffled, which Kyungsoo suspects is because his face is buried in her neck.

“I missed you too Jonginnie!” she replies almost as enthusiastically, “Come in!”

It’s no secret to anyone that Sehun and Jongin worship the two models, especially Luhan. Whenever those two are in town, Sehun will be at their place all the time whenever he’s not at work. Jongin would too but he’s not as shameless as Sehun, so he only goes over slightly less than all of the time.

Kyungsoo never did mind. At least the apartment is much quieter without the constant whining and requests for food.

But things have changed. She still doesn’t care where Sehun hangs out, as if, but Jongin? It’s different now. She likes him. She’s not sure if she can handle being in the apartment alone when she knows Jongin is just across the hallway with another girl. A noona crush for that matter.

Throughout dinner and after that, Kyungsoo tries her best to have a good time. She listens attentively when Luhan and Yixing tell them about their last trip; this time it was Milan. She politely declines when she’s offered a drink, she doesn’t want to wake up with another hang over. No, thank you. And lastly, she watches silently as Jongin chats animatedly with Luhan, next to a passed out Sehun. Yixing and Kris are nowhere to be seen by then, playing scrabble in her room maybe. Winks.

She tries, but no she doesn’t have a good time that night.

She doesn’t have a lot of experience with men, her last boyfriend being the first and only one to have that title, so she doesn’t know what to feel about Jongin.

At one point, he goes all caring and cuddly, making her giddy and hopeful. Then he goes treating her apathetically, as if she isn’t there.

As if she isn’t sitting right there. She might as well leave she decides not long after. So she stands up, alerting the two with the sudden movement.

“Where are you going Kyungsoo?”

“Home. I’m tired,” she smiles as she answers Luhan’s question, “I’ll see you around unnie.”

“Oh okay, see you.”

She doesn’t look at Jongin even once as she leaves.

When she’s back in their apartment and is a few steps away from her bedroom door, she hears the front door open.

“Kyungsoo.”

She stops walking and turn to face the speaker.

“Kyungsoo,” he repeats, “Are you okay?”

She swallows her saliva and her feelings, “Yes I am. Why don’t you stay there longer Jongin?”

He smirks and her knees weaken but she forces herself to stay upright.

“Do you want to be alone in the apartment tonight?” he says as he advances towards her, “Sehun isn’t waking up anytime soon and Kris hyung, well you know.”

His words sink in, there’s logic there, so she shakes her head vehemently.

“There you go. I’ll be in my room if you need me then.”

And as quickly as he appears, he turns back in the opposite direction, rubbing the back of her neck before he does so.

She remains rooted at her spot. She can never understand him can she?

A few seconds later, she hears Jongin shout, “I’ll be here if you want me, if you know what I mean. Don’t think I haven’t noticed your staring at my body lately Kyungsoo!”

She sighs. Why can’t she like a normal person instead?