Everlasting Sunset - Juniel

Grace

It was scary, trying again after a few years of not doing so. The rough texture of the handles still remain vivid in her mind, while the creaking sounds of the pedals still bring her into a state of uncertainty. The bumpy roads in which she once attempted to go still remained uneven, and her memories of that day still remained the same. It has already been a long time since she had tried learning how to bike, but the feelings she had of that day still lingered. It was a memory she had long tried to forget, a memory she had wanted to erase, much like how the scar on her knee that she acquired that day, faded in time.

But it was different. Even though she didn’t want to admit it, reality is still the same. Memories are still a part of an individual that would be hard to erase.

“I already told you that I can’t balance myself,” Aerin sighed, trying her best to pedal by herself even though she knew that it was useless for Sehun was pushing her bike from behind. “Why don’t we just stop? Teaching me how to bike is pointless.”

“No, it’s not.” Sehun responded, his voice at a closer proximity than Aerin had expected, causing for the girl to bite her lower lip. “I think… you’re just scared of falling.”

“So what if I really am?” It was true. Aerin was indeed scared of falling again. It was a process which she didn’t take comfort in, and had learned to despise in time. She already fell once and it hurt. The feelings she acquired that day stung her like a bee, leaving her with a scar. It was enough for her to be afraid, to loathe the thought of falling once more, for getting up after, was harder than one could ever imagine.

“Just believe in me and you’ll do fine.” Sehun said, increasing the pace in which the two of them were going. Realizing that the speed he was using in pushing her was getting faster, Aerin turned around in panic, only to be met by the male’s reassuring gaze. “Don’t be afraid of falling, it’s essential for you to learn. Once you’re able to do it, believe me, the fulfilment will overshadow the pain,” Sehun then eyed her and grinned. “And even if you do fall, I’ll catch you. I won’t let go.”

It was unexplainable, the impression she got from Sehun’s smile. It felt as if everything was okay, that everything was supposed to happen that way. His words made it seem as if falling was like nothing, that it doesn’t hurt, and that it doesn’t bring pain. The way he made things seem easier than the actual piqued something inside of Aerin, but it didn’t matter for in the end, she found herself following after his words.

She still disliked falling. Aerin still believed that the process was painful, but she realized that she’s got nothing to lose anymore. She might fall a couple more times, feel the same amount of hurting, but everything will still be the same. The first time was still the one that hurt the most.

When Sehun let go of the bike, a familiar feeling managed to overwhelm Aerin as she finally pedalled by herself. She felt free and accomplished, the same feeling she felt before upon being able to get up again. It was like she was flying into a sky full of easiness and blithe, a feeling she had long forgotten. “Luhan! I’m doing it! I’m—“

Realizing what she just said and seeing the very person that she just called, her focus soon came crashing down and was replaced by anxiety and surprise. The sight of the male staggered her, causing for her to lose control and fall. “Aerin!”

As she had expected, she did fall. Her body met contact with the ground first, followed by the screeching sound of the metallic bike grazing with the rough concrete. The incident surprised her. It caused for her heart to beat faster than the usual, but miraculously, nothing hurt. Sure, her felt a bit sore but it was nothing compared to the pain she felt before. Must it be because the carefree feeling she felt awhile ago overwhelmed her so much? Or must it be because Sehun’s words were true?

Aerin herself doesn’t know, but if Sehun was indeed right, then maybe, a part of her might give in to the possibility of changing her beliefs.

“Aerin, are you okay? Are you hurt somewhere? Did you bruise yourself?” Luhan’s worry-filled voice suddenly came nearer as Aerin felt her arms being hoisted up by Sehun. Shaking her head calmly, she then saw the older male crouching down, brushing her dirt stained knees and legs while checking for any possible scratches and cuts.

Not wanting for the situation to escalate, Aerin ignored the distorted look coming from Sehun and placed a hand on Luhan’s shoulder, giving him a reassuring smile before pulling him up to his feet. “Luhan, everything’s fine. I’m not hurt.” Aerin said. “Shocked, but not hurt.”

With his eyes shut closed, Luhan breathed heavily in an attempt to calm himself down before glaring at his brother angrily. “Why did you let Aerin bike by herself?! Didn’t I already tell you that she can’t?! What if she got bruised?! What if she got sprained?!” Luhan scolded, his eyebrows creased deeply. “What if she got hurt?!”

Feeling a bit confused about the sudden outburst of the male, Sehun frowned. “What’s the big deal? She was able to do it, right Aerin?”

Aerin nodded and turned to Luhan, touching his forehead to soften up the creases formed on it. “Sehun’s right.” Aerin spoke. “I’m thankful for him actually… since he was able to do what you weren’t able to before.”

“That’s right,” Sehun added, smiling smugly as he placed both hands on his hips. “Aren’t I the best?”

Fortunately though, Aerin’s gesture worked for Luhan found himself donning a deadpanned expression. He opened his mouth to speak, to defend himself, but no words soon came after for he knew it deep in himself that both Aerin and Sehun were right. Instead, he just moved away from the girl’s hand and pulled up the fallen bike, walking ahead of the two without any word.

Seeing as she had been too hyped up about using her truck these past few days, Aerin decided to go back to the basics and go around the neighbourhood with only her feet as her means of transportation. The last time she walked around the neighbourhood roads was just last year, when she was still unable to drive. Those times were tiring, but Aerin has to admit that she enjoyed it. If she were to choose which would be more enjoyable between walking or driving around Bansong-dong, she would choose the former. It might be easier to drive, but with walking, you would be able to see the sceneries more, relish the peaceful and serene surroundings, and even converse with the local residents around. Come to think of it, I kind of miss those times.

Feeling the need to take a break, Aerin stopped by a small eatery and decided to buy a small order of Ddeokbokki. She has always loved eating the said snack during hot summer days, so eating one made her feel excited. The owner of the eatery even remembered her from the other day so she was given more than what she paid for.