Seconds before the day ended and the next began, Lee Sungmin lit a match.

 August

The moment the clock struck twelve, Sungmin touched the match to a red candle resting in the palm of his hand. In the darkness the candle was almost black but with the light it came alive, becoming a fiery red that almost seemed to spark on its own.  Sungmin watched the small flame flicker, entranced by its beauty before placing it gently in the middle of the table, blowing out the match and going back to his bed room.

7th

Sungmin lay in bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. It was a flat plane of simple white, nothing special, and yet Sungmin couldn’t look away.

After a few hours his eyes began to hurt and he succumbed to the feeling, letting his eyes close in relief, but sleep wouldn’t come.  He reached his hand under his pillow, searching for the familiar feel of cold metal, and pulled out his 9mm pistol. The weight was comfortable in his hands.

With eyes still closed he inserted the ammo, taking his time. When the gun was loaded, he aimed blindly, testing the weight and relishing in the way the gun felt like an extension of his arm, before putting it back into his lap and unloading it. 

Monday

Sungmin opened his eyes, light filtering through the edges of the thick curtains, sunlight spilling into the dark room. Usually at this time of day, he would be awake already, woken by the house coming alive. Familiar voices would echo through the halls, hurrying to begin their day. A certain kid would be getting ready to go to school while another would already be tapping away at their computer. Sungmin himself would be cooking breakfast, sometimes toast with fruit and other days pancakes and tea.

Today, the house was empty.

7 O’clock

Sungmin hadn’t moved from his spot on the bed and even though the room was cold, he could feel himself sweating. The blankets seemed to be constricting him, tying him down so all he could do was struggle and wish for it to end. He was gripping the gun under his pillow, but couldn’t seem to remember how to use it. It felt like an empty weight in his hands, the sense of comfort gone.

11 Minutes

He stared endlessly at the blank white ceiling, unable to move, to look away. His whole body screamed that this was wrong, that this should never happen, that it was all just a dream and that none of this existed. He waited for someone to pop out and tell him this was just a joke, a lie.

He had a choice. His finger was on the trigger, but he couldn’t, he wouldn’t. He felt his eyes closing, refusing to submit and accepting his fate. It was over.

13 Seconds

The sound of a gunshot rang in his ears and all Sungmin saw was blood.