After I had that dream I became confused, was that all just a dream or was that part of my memory coming back and if it is how much of it was real? Did Kikwang and I have that type of relationship? I didn't know what to believe anymore it was getting to complicated  causing my head to travel in circles  making me dizzy countless times. Since then I haven't been able to look at Kikwang with a happy face because I see a flashback of what his face looked like and the horrible things I said to him I couldn't help but think if that was how I really felt, I wanted to drink again but what if I do something stupid and regret it. I was deep in my thoughts when a pair of arms was s around my waist while I mindlessly cooked some porridge for breakfast since I woke up later than the rest.

"Morning sleepy head, is everything alright it looks like your thinking really hard about something or are you still half asleep making that?"

" Hmmm. huh? Oh its just you Junhyung what's up? You want some to?" I tilted my head then continued to finish making it before I poured some in a bowl for myself.

" Anni its alright did something happen?" He tapped my shoulder making me snap out of my thoughts for the second time since he started talking to me.

" Sorry. I-I'm just a bit troubled right now and can't sort out my thoughts all because of a dream I had last night, I can't seem to get it out of my head and I don't know if it was real or not but the way I felt I don't understand properly."

" Was it that bad?" I nodded taking a mouthful and shoving it in my mouth, " Ok. How about when you finish eating go back upstairs freshen up and meet me back down here, I have an idea that might cheer you up." I sighed but agreed to do it anyway but I don't think it will work no matter what he plans because the moment I see Kikwang I'll feel miserable again.

About 20 minutes later I came back down stairs wearing a dark brown skirt with a red sweater and white scarf because it was suppose to be a bit cold outside later today and it was the first thing that I managed to pull out of the cupboard. Once I made it downstairs I looked around for Junghyung until he came in from the living room where everyone else was watching a movie together,as he saw me he stood up and made his way towards where I was now standing still and he wrapped one of his arms around my waist signalling for us to leave. He took one of the cars that was parked inside the garage and we drove off somewhere. I stared blankly outside the window making no conversation what-so-ever until he pulled into a park. We walked around for a while still saying nothing until we ran into a little kid that was crying on the footpath and I immediately ran to it.

" Gwenchana? Your not hurt anywhere are you?" the little boy nodded his head while looking up to me face covered in tears.

" Is your omma or appa around?" He shook his head looking back down, I turned to face Junhyung and he just nodded as if he already knew what I was going to say. " Arrasso we'll help you look for them."

I held hands with the little boy and sat at a bench while Junhyung went to get some bandaids from across the road, while he was gone I tried to have a small conversation with the boy to calm him down a bit. Before Junhyung returned I found out his name was also Kikwang which startled me in a good way, I guess meeting this boy was a sign for me to get over what thoughts and problems were going on inside my head and as Junhyung came back the both of us were laughing about how some of the clouds looked like weird creatures.

" Its good to see the pair of you laughing. Here's the bandaids and I got each of us a bottle of apple juice."

" Thanks" " Gomawo" We both thanked Junhyung for the drinks then I applied the bandaid to his scraped knee and arm

 "So Kikwang where did you lose your parents?" the little boy sat quietly drinking his drink it semed like he didn't want to answer, " did you have a fight?" I asked and he nodded.

" Did you want to talk about it?" Junhyung asked softly trying not to look intimidating.

He didn't say anything so I asked Junhyung to leave us for a while, it seemed the boy only wanted to talk with me. Once Junhyung left us and we were along the young boy began to talk, it seemed that he and his older sister had an understanding. The older sister wanted Kikwang to stay by her side meanwhile he just wanted to go have some fun the sister went to get some drinks and Kikwang ran off while she wasn't looking. He was only meant to be gone for a little bit but when he went looking for his sister she wasn't where he last saw her  and in the process of looking for her he tripped and hurt himself and thats when he met me. It made sense but the both of them were at fault for not understanding eachother.

" It's alright Kikwang Junhyung and I will stay with you until we find your sister." I gave him a soft smile hoping it would cheer him up and it did.

" But noona. . you seem sad wae?" I surprised myself how did this little kid know, did I really look like that.

" Do I look sad?"

" No you look fine but I don't know it just that when I was talking earlier it seemed like you were also worried or sad about something else."

"I'm sorry but I am. You see I have aparently lost part of my memories about a guy who has the same name as you so when you were talking I almost saw him in you and it made me sad."

"why? Did this guy do something bad to you?" I leaned back and began to think.

" I don't know. I had this dream but it felt so real and I'm afraid to look at him. In my dream I said really horrible things to him and I have this feeling that everything I said about him was true but at the same time I was dissapointed and scared of myself."

" Cheer up noona I'm sure that if you say something he would understand and maybe tell you why."

"Thanks Kikwang I would like that."

About an hour later  Kikwang's older sister found him and thanked us for taking care of him, it seemed she was really worried by the way she hugged him immediately before she thanked up and left. Junhyung could tell that me meeting that kid was a good idea.We didn't stay much longer after then, we had a late lunch and returned home. Once I walked through the door Jiyong came running up to me saying how Daehyun was being a jerk and wasn't talking to him, I laughed at how cute she was but it seemed like Daehyun had something else on his mind and apologised to her over and over again until she forgave him. Which she didn't do until about half an hour later by the way. I went to my room and lay on the bed for a while when Junhyung came through and sat beside me.

" So feeling any better?"

"yeah thanks. I think I know what I have to do to settle what I'm feeling." He looked at me with a disappointed face.

" You have to see Kikwang right? I thought so. So the dream was about him." I nodded and told him about the dream I had.

" Go see him, everything will make sense an dif he doesn't do anything I will personally threaten him."

" Just- Don't be to harsh I don't like it when you all fight."

" haha alright that is if he doesn't hurt you. You know I like you right?"

" Yeah and thats why I'm worried that you would go over board punishing him." I partly joked back but laughing slightly at just teh thought.

"Ok well I have to leave now but serious, if he makes you cry again he bette be ready."

" Just go!!"

~ Later that night

I looked at my phone it was getting late but I couldn't sleep,I went through my contacts but I as I was scrolling down I saw 'his' /name, I didn't remember when I got his number. I looked at it for 5 minutes then decided to call him. It rang for a few seconds but when I heard his voice I went into shock. I couldn't speak.

" Yoboseyo? Is anyone there? Hello?

" Ahh K-Kikwang? Kikwang is that you?" I could barely get my words out of my mouth

"Yeah this is me, who is this? Eun Mi is that you? Whats wrong?"

" I-its me, can I see you right now?"

" Sure. did you want to meet at that park near my dad's?"

" Ok."

" I'll be there soon."

Once we both hung up the phone my heart as still racing, I needed to confirm what was wrong with me. I got into some warm clothes and left the house making my way over to the park near his dad's. It didn't take long for me to get there but when I arrived I was a bit surprised to see him already there. Wasn't he able to sleep either.

" Kikwang I need to talk to you and you have to answer what I ask."