(10)

“Why did you not let Hyojung come? She’s my assistant. She should come with me.”

Watching Hayoon-ssi scolding Miri is fun and all, but I got to find this Yang boy and hit him. God answered my prayers when one staff member called me out, saying Yoseob was looking for me outside.

I wordlessly left Hayoon and Miri basically talking back to each other and ran to the door. Yoseob was peeking at the door with an unreadable look on his face.

“I guess you have some apologies to say,” I said, hand on my hip.

“You weren’t careful,” he pouted.

“Oh, so it’s my fault now?”

“Okay, okay, I’m so sorry, Hyojungie!” he clasped his hands together like he was praying. “I’ll do whatever you want just don’t be mad at me.”

I laughed purposely to annoy him and poked his forehead with my finger. “You’re so fun to tease.”

“So fun to tease, is it? I guess you don’t want anything from me then,” he turned to his heals and walked away. I huffed and tugged his jacket.

“I want Starbucks coffee.”

“You can ask for a date anytime.”

Well, yeah, now that you said it... But who is this person and what did he do to Yoseob?! He wants a date?

“Don’t be so full of yourself. I want to keep the coffee all for myself.” I smirked and found his phone in his hand. I completely forgot of the reason why I came looking for him. I saw that he has the article opened in his phone.

“Hey, is that the article?”

I was about to get it when he moved backward and I slightly stumbled forward.

“Hey, I’ll just read it.” I said, following every step he takes just to take the phone.

“Why won’t you let me just take a good look?!” My voice started to go higher and the next thing I knew, I was running after him.

“Yang Yoseob, come back!” I shouted and followed him down the hall. Just when I was a teeny bit close, I literally lunged at him. He lost his balance and fell to the floor as I stole the phone from his hands.

“You’re like a gorilla...” he huffed as he positioned himself to sit down on the floor while I was standing up and reading the whole thing.

“I’ll pretend that I didn’t hear that.”

If he kept this to me because he thought it was offending (it actually was but that didn’t affect me at all), then he’s totally wrong. Sure, there’s a blurry picture of my eyes but there’s also Yoseob making the weirdest expression ever. What was he doing during this time?

“Why are you laughing?”

“Nothing! Don’t mind me!” I clutched my hurting stomach and gasped for air. This is the best laugh that I’ve had in years!

Yoseob stood up and tried to snatch his phone from me. I dodged every time he tried to get it, still having hysterics. Don’t get me wrong, he still looks so cute as usual but this is a really new look of him for me. What a derp.

I was too busy laughing my off that I didn’t realize Yoseob creeping behind my back. He threw his arms around me, trying to get his phone. Trying to get his phone, while back-hugging me. Back-hugging me. Yang Yoseob is back-hugging me. I repeat: I’m being back-hugged by one of the top idol group’s main vocal. Yang Yoseob is back-hugging me.

Holy god of Backhugs, thank you.

I stopped trying to hide his dear phone and he quickly caught it and proudly slipped it into his pocket.

“You two sure got lots of free time.” I heard just behind us and saw President Hong with an amused expression across his face.

Please tell me he did not just see that.

~*~

“Let me get this straight. You were not allowed to go the venue? And Yoseob told you to go? So you went there? And those were your eyes?” I nodded to every question President Hong shot at me. It pained my heart knowing the mistake I did that even put Yoseob and me inside President Hong’s office. This is like being sent to the Principal’s Office when you’re in elementary. Really uncomfortable and nervy.

“This is really bad, Hyojung.”

“I know,” I lowered my head in guilt.

“It was my fault...” Yoseob responded.

“I know.” President Hong sighed. “What were you thinking?”

“It was my mistake not thinking at all,” he honestly answered.

“But,” I started, trying to defend the both of us. “Yoseob...-ssi was just trying to help.”

“How so?”

“I was needed for the venue. Well, not really needed but I wasn’t prohibited to go like Miri-ssi said. Yoon Hayoon-ssi said wherever she goes, I go. And that’s what I did.”

“You got a point, Hyojung. But still not following what the head coordinator says is still wrong.”

I nodded, rather embarrassed.

“But she was also in the wrong, if you ask me. I’d like to have a talk with Miri-ssi later,” he clasped his fingers together and looked at me and Yoseob. “The problem isn’t that actually, it’s the article.”

“Please don’t lie about this like most companies do.” I requested. President Hong arched a brow and a smile slowly appeared on his face. I stole a glance at Yoseob and he was also smiling at me. I take that as a quiet compliment.

“Are you sure about this, Song Hyojung?”

“Just don’t say my name.” I quietly asked, grinning. I waited for President Hong’s reply while biting my lower lip.

“We wouldn’t want that, now would we?” President Hong cleared his throat and coughed hard.

“This concludes the end of our talk. Yoseob, can you give Hyojung and me a minute?”

I heard that P. Hong isn’t as strict as most CEO’s but having a private conversation with him still scares me. It’s weird how he intimidates me but at the same time doesn’t make me panic that much. Yoseob gave me an assuring pat on the head and left the room quietly. I breathed in deeply and exhaled through my nose. The nervousness is killing me.

“You two sure are close, aren’t you?”  It occurred to me that Hong Seung-sung was a direct man.

“I think so?” My answer ended up as a question. I cleared my throat and tried again. “I think so.”

“You’re one promising employee here, Hyojung, I can see that. But I suggest you to be a little more careful and alert.” He sounded concerned.

I nodded. “I understand. I’ll be more cautious next time.”

“Ever head of CUBE’s dating ban?” My heart reacted rather quickly, and the way it beat against my chest hurts.

“N-no.”

“Exactly. CUBE has no dating ban. If ever in the future something happens, I ask of you to also be careful and think before you act. Let this be a lesson for you. You may go.” President Hong is like my grandfather. He’s earnest and honest. I didn’t even have to feign ignorance and ask for what he meant. I merely nodded my head and thanked him before I left the room.

The second I stepped out of the room, I found myself repressing a smile. Does this mean that he approves of me dating Yoseob? I... no. Nope nope nope nope. Nope. Nope. Shut up, Song Hyojung.

~*~

I recently ended Yoon Hayoon’s and my Japanese class with the trainees before preparing to leave.  I was combing my hair inside the restroom when my phone suddenly rang.

“Hello?”

There was a feminine voice on the other line. “Is this Song Hyojung?”

“Yes, who is this?” I asked nervously.

“Song Hyojung, daughter of Song Hyori?” My lips were starting to quiver.

“Yes, why?”

“This is Geum Dani from ABC Hospital. We called you because your mother requests for your presence.”

“W-what?” I forced myself to say. Please, don’t let it be what I’m thinking it would be...

“Your mom fainted due to overexertion. We’ve already informed your father and he is already on his way here. I’ll say the exact details to you personally. Your mom is resting at the moment, but she insisted you to come,” she sounded so calm, or maybe with a voice telling me that everything is okay, everything is calm, everything is under control. Too bad I have trust issues.

~*~

Surprisingly, my eyes didn’t go wet at all. I didn’t cry, but I was extremely worried and restless. I just recently left home, only to find out my mom overworking herself again. She’s done this many times already and I always had to remind her of her wellbeing. With me gone, I figure she went back to herself ignoring her health when working.

 Silently praying, I saw that a cab was already parked in front of the building the time I got out CUBE. Ignoring the pain I feel on my legs, I ran to the cab before it drove away.

“Ahjussi, do you know where ABC Hospital is?” I breathlessly asked, peering over the cab’s open window.

“It’s just a few blocks away. Are you getting in?”

“Yes. Please hurry.”

My hands trembling, I hastily got in the back of the cab, bumping my head in the process. Whinging an “Ouch.”, my tears continuously dripped down my chin. Seriously, what the heck? I shouldn’t be crying. Everything is okay. Everything is calm. Everything is under control. My mom will be okay. My mom is okay. She’s resting right now and I’m just being a pathetic cry baby.

“Hey, hey, Hyojungie, why are you crying?”

What’s up with me? I’m even hearing Yoseob in my head. I’ve gone nuts.

“I’m going insane.” I mumbled under my breath, looking down at my hands. I felt a hand land on my shoulder and I flinched and quickly snapped my head to where the hand came from.

I awkwardly laugh and sniffed, wiping my tears with my sleeve. “Sorry, I didn’t notice you were here... I was just – It was raining on my face. I mean, sweat on my face –“

“Yah, do you think I’m stupid?” I didn’t respond and looked away. He’s right. The stupid one is me. Seriously, Hyojung? Raining on your face?

Yoseob leaned closer and wiped my cheek with the back of his sleeve. “Do you want to talk about it?”

I think I’m going to cry more. My heart is pounding too fast. No boy (excluding my dad) has ever wiped my tears for me until this day.

“Hey, you’re crying again! I’m so sorry, Hyojung! Stop crying. Hey.”

“I’m not crying anymore with your sleeve punching my eye...” I mumbled, wiping my own tears this time. “My situation isn’t a crying matter, to be very honest; my tears suddenly just went woosh.”

“I heard you’re going to a hospital.”

“My mom. She collapsed. She’s okay now. I was just very worried.”

“It’s alright to cry.” Yoseob patted my head and wore this assuring smile. I held back a wide smile; maybe it would be too wide it would creep him out.

“Thanks.” I gave him a timid smile and tapped a message to my mom saying I’m on my way to the hospital. The short trip turned quiet for a moment, before Yoseob decided to cut the silence.

“You want to hear something funny?” There’s excitement in his voice. I shot him a questioning look.

“You look very sad, Hyojungie. I just had to say this. Do you want to hear it?”

I sniffed (I seriously want to blow my nose right now) and slowly nodded. Yoseob inhaled deeply and let out a deep breath.

“What do you call a guy with a rubber toe?” he asked, anticipating.

“Wait, what?” What is he on about?

“What do you call a guy with a rubber toe?” he repeated.

“Um, I don’t know? Is this supposed to be a joke?” I was so confused, my eyebrows furrowed together.

“Roberto.”

“What?”

“Roberto. The answer is Roberto. Get it? Roberto with a rubber toe!” he exclaimed, with hopeful eyes.

My mouth was hanged open for a while before getting the lame joke. It was so lame. So so so lame, I laughed harder than I thought. Yoseob, please. Roberto, please.

“What the hell?!” I said in between laughs. “How dare you! That’s the worst joke I’ve ever heard!”

“But it worked right?”

“You and the Internet do wonders.”

“I didn’t search the net...”

“Oh shut up. I see the jokes website on your phone right there!” I belted, pointing his phone screen.

Yoseob pouted and I hit the top of his head lightly, giggling.

“I’m going to give you a point for effort.”

“We’re already here.” The cab driver spoke and the cab halted.

I pursed my lips and breathed through my nose. As much as I want to stay with a guy who just made a Roberto joke, my mom is much more important.

“I’ll see you when I see you, Yoseob. Thanks to your friend Roberto, too.” I waved and got off the car after I paid the cab fee.

~*~

It took me a whole lot of courage before I opened the hospital room of my mother. I was expecting a very frail woman soundly sleeping under the white covers. Instead I saw my mother jamming to A-Pink songs on the television. My eye twitched. I can’t believe her...

“MOM!” I yelled. I was worried over my mom who didn’t even worry about herself.

She immediately muted the television and looked at me with a gentle smile.

“You finally arrived Hyojung-ah,” she uttered. “You’re late!”

“I came as quick as I can. How about you, mom? You should be resting!”

“I just woke up an hour ago and I can’t stand such a quiet room. Good thing Music Bank was still on.”

“You should be resting!” I repeated, disbelief all over my voice.

“Now, now, don’t go mad at a sick woman. I was lonely okay. The only thing I have before you came was the TV.”

“You overworked again.” I sighed and sat at the empty chair right next to her bed.

“I had to, okay?”

“Health before everything, mom. I always told you that.” I puffed my cheeks and looked at her. She looked like what she always looked like, but with tired bloodshot eyes.

“You’re working hard, Hyojung-ah. I need to work hard too. Oh wait – you brought a boy?” she lifted her head and turned at the door.

My lips parted and I instantly looked at who I guessed would follow me all the way here. My eyes widened.

“What are you doing here?!” I mouthed, making random hand movements then drawing a question mark at the air.

“I was worried!” he mouthed back and pointed something right next to him. “I was just about to go.”

“Go!” I whispered, shooing him with my hands, telling him to go quickly.

“Tell him to go inside!” my mom loudly insisted, shaking my arm.

“No, no, no, mom. He’s terribly busy with life right now, so –“

“He came all the way here. Do you think he would do it if he were busy?” Wrinkles were starting to form on her forehead.

“Mom, you don’t understand, he –“

“Go!” she pushed me with such force with just one hand. Where did she get all the strength from?

I got to my feet and stomped my way outside her room. Yoseob was just about to enter the elevator. He noticed me rather quickly.

“You’re going home already?” he asked innocently, slipping his phone in his back pocket.

“She asks for you.” I uttered.

“Your mom?” he innocently asked.

“Nope, my great grandma. Of course, you!” I retorted and grabbed his sleeve, and started dragging him to my mom’s room.

“Why did you even come? Heck, why were you in the cab on such an early hour?” I asked.

“I decided to do some house cleaning since I have another free schedule. And I told you, I was worried.”

“What was there to be worried about?”

“You were crying.”

Dramas say when things like this happen, you stop right on your tracks and turn to your heels and look at him straight in the eye with a shocked expression on your face. Not going for the cliché, I said a quick “Is that so.” and kept walking until we reached my mom’s room. Don’t get me wrong, my heart was beating like crazy I thought my legs would give in.

“Hello, eomoni, I’m Yang Yoseob.” Yoseob introduced himself smoothly when I told him to, with a shy smile on his face.

“I was right! You’re from BEAST, right?”

There’s no doubt that the reason why she asked me to chase Yoseob all the way from the elevator is because he is a celebrity.

“Ah, yes.”

“My, you’re really handsome in person. Why is a famous person like you with my daughter?” My mom was having too much fun. I cleared my throat and whispered “Don’t.” to my mom with a forced smile.

“It’s not like that, eomoni. Hyojungie was crying a while ago and I got the feeling of wanting to check up on her – and of course, you too...um, eomoni.” Yoseob nodded along to his words, like saying Good job, Yoseobie, you did it right.

“Take a sit, dear.” My mom motioned him to sit on the spare chair by the end of the room and Yoseob carried it to take a sit by my side.

“So... you’re not dating, the two of you?” she asked in a hushed tone and I bit my lower lip hard. Someone please stop my mother, I beg of you.

Yoseob and I both shook our heads, me doing it too violently I went dizzy for a moment.

“Too bad.”

I coughed and leaned my side closer to Yoseob and whispered, “Please don’t take her words to heart, thanks.”

“Yoseob, right? You’re my favourite member.”

“Oh please, mom, he’s the only one from BEAST that you know.” I sighed deeply.

“Aigoo, don’t say that, Hyojung!” she directed her attention back to Yoseob. “But really, you’re my favourite. Especially that time when you sang Mother.”

“She cried when she heard it,” I snickered and suppressed my laugh using my palm.

“I was cutting onions!” she lied.

“You’re both the same.” Yoseob murmured to me and I lightly slapped his arm.

“Mom, it’s getting late I think Yoseob here needs to go.” I interjected and she just merely shook her head.

“Before you go, can I make a request?” she asked, batting her eyelashes at Yoseob. Mom, why...

Yoseob nodded. “What is it?”

“Can you sing me a song, son?”

I didn’t even react. In fact, I was actually waiting for her to say that for no reason at all.

Yoseob nodded again and smiled. “What song do you want?”

“I have one BEAST song that I like. I really like Lightless. The ballad one.”

Yoseob gave off a little surprised chuckle and cleared his throat.

“How did you know that, eomoni? It’s not our title track.”

Mom found my cousin’s BEAST album some time before and listened to all the songs. She liked Lightless (the unplugged version) ever since, saying that it’s like a lullaby. She put it on loudspeakers every night ever since that day. Though I’d say On Rainy Days is the best mood song, especially during, well, rainy days.

Even if I try to find you like this

Yang Yoseob is singing again. The infatuating feeling was surprisingly gone. The moment he started singing, yes, my heart throbbed, I felt it wanting to escape my chest. But that’s it.

Even if I try to think of you again like this

There were no butterflies in the stomach, but a sense of calm was left. It was a good calm. It was an I feel so relaxed; like my shoulders are very light kind of calm. Yoseob’s voice is like the serene sea.

When I try to look at you just one more time

The urge to hug Yoseob is so strong. Like tidal wave kind of strong. And I’m not even the one he’s singing to.

I can’t do anything because I lost my sight

L L L L Lightless L L L L Lightless

L L L L Lightless L L L L Lightless

“I hope you enjoyed it, eomoni.” Yoseob chimed. The expression on my mom’s face was precious. Yoseob singing to my mom is precious.

“You never disappoint, do you?” Mom commended, patting Yoseob’s arm. She yawned and slowly laid her back on the bed.

“You don’t have a schedule today, Yoseob?”

“No, I was just about to go home.”

“I told you mom, Yoseob has stuff to do,” I told her again.

“What kind of stuff?” Mom, please.

“Spring cleaning...”

“Spring cleaning!” Mom cried and slapped her knee. “You should’ve told me a while ago. Cleaning takes such a long time when you do it alone.”

Yoseob shook his head with an assuring smile. “I’ve done it before, eomoni. It’s alright.”

“My daughter here is good at cleaning,” she patted my back. My eyes widened and I turned to her, eyes pleading for her to stop. She ignored my silent plea. “She could help you. I mean, she didn’t have a job for a very long time and the only things she did at home were clean and surf the net.”

I was close to face-palming. I turned my head to Yoseob this time and wordlessly asked him to say no with my eyes while shaking my head.

“It’s really okay, eomoni.” I know things can get really infuriating when elders tell you to do unreasonable stuff and you don’t even like to that stuff, but Yoseob didn’t even show even a small hint of annoyance. He may feel a tinge of it and if so, then he’s really good at hiding exasperation. Apart from my uncle from the farm, he’s the most patient guy I know.

“Mom, you should really take the whole day resting.” I worriedly advised, pulling her blankets and fluffing her pillow. “You can’t be working 24/7.”

She looked at her hand phone and patted my arm. “Thank you for visiting me, child. And Yoseob here too. You two should go and leave your grandma here to rest.”

“I’ll keep you company until dad comes,” I said, and then turned to Yoseob. “You should go. You got cleaning to do.”

 “You don’t want me around anymore?” he moped.

“You want to stay?”

“As much as I want to – yeah, I should really get going.” Yoseob stood up from his chair and wished my mom to get well soon. I excused myself to my mom to walk Yoseob out of the room.

“Really, thank you for visiting, and for singing to my mom. That’s really lovely.” I couldn’t help myself from smiling too much.

“It’s my pleasure. Frankly, I’m very glad I got to sing to you both.”

Flashbacks of him singing to me suddenly just started filling up my mind and I was so cautious of what I should say next.

“Are personal concerts your thing nowadays?” I asked, hiding every hint of infatuation from my voice.

“When it comes to you,” he said it so naturally, I don’t even know anymore. I was in a state of astonishment. Absolutely tongue-tied, I just stared at him, mentally panicking on what should I say next to avoid unnecessary discomfort to occur between us.

Yoseob cleared his throat and shuffled his feet. “You should come back to your mom.”

“Yeah, I should definitely go,” I nodded and waved him goodbye as he walked away from me. Turning back, I hit my forehead on the wall.

When it comes to Yang Yoseob everything just seems to be so surreal. Like, is this the real life or just some fantasy that I’m making up on my own?

Reality just became so good it doesn’t even feel like reality anymore. 

A/N: Finally an update! I'm so sorry it took more than a month for me to update :(( I should've posted this chapter 2 days ago but typhoon happened and electricity was cut off for such a long time we had to move to my mom's office ;__; I can't promise that I won't be updating like a turtle again since i have quarterly and college exams coming up :((((((( the stress is no joke sobs

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