A/N: Forgive all mistakes I haven't had my Beta read it. (She is in Cambodia doing short term missions work so is current unavailable to me.)

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Seung-Hyun's POV:

 

Pregnant? My Little One might be pregnant? How? When? Pregnant?! A baby?!?! Of our own?!?! A child to raise. A child of our own, to tuck into bed each night, to kiss their ochies, to nag about eating all his or her vegetables...a child of our own!!!

 

I vaguely am aware of Jiyong asking if it is possible. I don't hear her answer over the rush of blood that is pounding in my ears and am trying to figure out why the color has drained from the room.

 

I wasn't really aware of anything until my Heart fell down on his knees in front of me. I looked in his eyes, and saw my own feelings reflected there. In a brief moment I saw the confusion, the hope, the fear, the joy all mixed together.

 

I reached out to him, to let him know I understood, but before my hand could make contact he crumpled at my feet. I found this curious. Why was he laying on the floor.

 

As I pondered this Sinhae-a comes over, I think she is talking but I can't hear what she is saying. I look at her perplexed. She rolls Ji over onto his back and looks up at me expectantly. I still can't hear her, I wonder why.

 

*SMACK!*

 

The world comes rushing back to me, the colors and sounds flood my senses as I hear Sinhae say, “What the hell! Come on, Dear One! I can't do this alone!!!”

 

The desperation in her voices belies the fact that she means more than just Ji on the floor.

 

I look down at her and cup her face, “You will never have to.” Sinhae tries to hold back the little sob that escapes from her in relief that I am again with her and my heart twists painfully in my chest at the realization that my Little One is terrified.

 

I kneel down next to Ji on the floor and try to rouse him. I lightly smack his cheek, while musing over the fact that I can still feel the sting from my wife's hand on my own.

 

“Ji, babe...come on. You gotta wake up now, babe.” His eyes start to flutter open, “There we go.”

 

I wait as his eyes come fully open and I wait for his face to register that he remembers what is going on. When his eyes get wide and his gaze locks onto Sinhae I know he is back.

 

“Let's get you both up in chairs, so we can actually talk about this.” I tell both of my loves.

 

As I help them both sit down in the chairs my mind is racing. I am trying not to get too excited, I do not want to let myself imagine how amazing a child would be until we have the test back from Dr. Lee.

 

I stood looking down at the two people I love most in this world, trying to think of what the right thing to say would be...and failing.

 

“I am trying to think of the perfect thing to say, the thing that will make us all feel anchored, and that will allow us to comprehend what is happening right now, and I gotta say I am not coming up with anything.” They booth looked up with slightly amused, but I still saw the anxiety, confusion and deeply buried joy in both of their eyes.

 

“I know that I am scared, shocked, excited, confused and above all...my heart is soaring with hope, while my brain keeps trying to bring it down until Dr. Lee comes back!” I decide that the truth is the best way to go right now.

 

Tears begin to leak down Sinhae-a's cheeks.

 

“I am so so sorry!” She sobbed out.

 

Jiyong-a turned and enveloped her in his arms, “Whatever for?!?!? You have nothing to be sorry for!”

 

“I didn't want this to happen...” She sniffed and wiped her running nose on her sleeve. “I didn't want to give you both false hope...I can't get pregnant, they always told me there would never be any possibility of a child...and now...even if it is true...h-how can I do this to you both right now?!!” She was forced to stop talking by the sobs that could no longer be held back.

 

I knelt in front of her, “What are you talking about my brave Little One? How can you do what to us?”

 

It took her a moment to pull herself together to explain, “You are both so busy at an important time in your careers, how can I bring—I mean-- how can we-- the fans-- the public...a baby changes everything!! How can you be asked to--”

 

“Shut up.” Ji said. It was said softly but with so much finality and expectation to be obeyed I think YG himself would have obeyed. Little One and I both looked at our Heart with big eyes.

 

“I never want to hear you ever say something like that again. You are not doing anything to us! We are a family, and if God chooses to bless us with this miracle nothing else matters. My solo career, Dear One's acting, BIGBANG...none of it matters. The only thing that will matter is the gift of life that you will carry.” He paused, his tone still deathly soft but now much warmer.

 

“Look at me, both of you.” He paused to make eye contact with us both, “No one is ever in the perfect place to have a child. If people waited for the perfect time no one would ever have any kids. We were not trying, we did not expect this, but we will cherish this entire experience. Yes, Sinhae-a, a child does change everything. Will it be easy? No. Will it be worth it? HELL YES! If you are pregnant then everything focuses around that, and the other three members of BIGBANG will be there standing shoulder to shoulder with us...probably suggesting that we name the baby after them!”

 

He ended grinning at us widely. We both had no choice but to grin back, knowing what he said was true all three of them would be jockeying for us to name our child after them...that is if our Little was really with child.

 

How badly my heart wanted to believe she is carrying our child! My thoughts are all over the place as I try desperately to calm them down and focus.

 

“Yes, it will be hell for a bit. Rearranging schedules, the album, the tour...dealing with fans, the public, and just deciding HOW to deal with them, what we say...BUT it doesn't matter. I will say that again: All that other stuff does not matter. The only thing that matters now and the only thing that will ever matter is our family...the three of us first-and-foremost, then the group, and then our extend families. Together we will figure out how to make this work.”

 

I finally seemed to have myself together and added, “If we have to step back from the public so be it, I will have no regrets. Besides, I do not think we would have to step back forever. Other idols have families and we can too.”

 

“Other idols are only married to one spouse...and not one of the same .” Sinhae said quietly.

 

I looked at her making sure she was looking at me, “We will make it work. We have never shied away from a challenge, and we are not going to start now.” I replied firmly.

 

“But there is just so much in this challenge.” She whispered.

 

“Like what? Please, baby, tell us what you are most afraid of.” I asked of her.

 

“What am I afraid of?” She looked at my wife and the fire was back in her eyes, but it wasn't the determined fire, it was the fire of fear and desperation. “I am afraid of hurting your careers, all of you; Youngbae, Seungri, Daeseung, as well as the two of you. I am afraid of the fans lashing out at you when they find out...well I am afraid of that too, what do we tell them? Whose child do we say this is? What happens if we tell them it is Ji's and it turns out to look just like Seunghyun??? What if we say it is Dear One's and it looks just like our Heart? Do we say I am a girlfriend, a fiancee, a wife? If we announce I am a fiancee or wife all the fan will assume it is because I am pregnant and will hate me forever...the backlash from that could be really scary! I would not be able to leave the house alone...How do I explain to our child why people yell horrible things at Mommy when we go out? How much DO we tell the public? We cannot tell them everything, that would truly be the end of the both of you. So do we say I am Ji's girlfriend, and continue the charade that Dear One is my adoptive brother? What will President Yang say? How much money will this cost him, and the company? How can we bring a child into the craziness that is our life?!?! This life where we hide and lie as a matter of survival?!?!!? How do we explain that both of his or her fathers cannot acknowledge them in public?!?!? How do we make sure that our child doesn't run up to both of you in public crying 'Appa!' expecting to be scooped up and loved? How do we raise a child when none of us have a clue about any of it? How do I become what I never felt I was meant to be? How do I become a good mother??? How can we do any of this?”

 

When she finished all three of us were in tears. I scooped her up and sat down on the chair hugging her to my chest and she again started sobbing. Ji was sitting on the chair beside us, Sinhae's back toward him. He scooted up to lean against us and wrap an arm around our Little One.

 

“I don't have answers for all of those questions, and neither does our Dear One...but we don't need them, not yet. We will get through all of the thing you mentioned by taking one step at a time. We will first find out if you are pregnant and if you are, we rejoice. We then talk with Dr. Lee about what the next steps need to be and what we need to do concerning the pregnancy. After that we will tell the rest of BIGBANG, and together, as a unit, we will go to Yang-Hyung. We will rely on the wisdom of the trusted friends around us and we will make a plan to do this. After that, we gather our families and tell them...and after all that, we will decide what color to make the nursery!!!!” Jiyong finished, his voice bright and the excitement apparent.

 

In spite of all fear and uncertainty surrounding the situation both Sinhae and I laughed at our Heart's last comment.

 

“You are really already thinking about the nursery?” Sinhae asked incredulously.

 

“Of course he is...he is already planning out baby outfits!” I told her chuckling. “He has had baby nurseries planned in his head for years, whether we had one or adopted, he has been planning.”

 

“Really?” She asked looking over her shoulder at him.

 

He grinned shyly, “Yeah.” He ducked his head as he answered.

 

“Why haven't you ever shared those plans with me?” Little One asked.

 

“I didn't want you to feel bad, or that I felt something was lacking...I do NOT feel that anything is lacking! But, you know me...I like to dream and plan...” He trailed off.

 

“Yes, I do know you. It is why I did not want to tell you guys until I was certain. It is going to hurt me so much to see your expressions of hurt and disappointment if I am not pregnant.”

 

“Baby, I know you are scared, but we will love you just as much as ever, even if you aren't pregnant. You will not fail us in any way if Dr. Lee comes back in here and tells us this is all a mistake. You have done nothing wrong here, you do know that right?” I asked her, concerned at where her mind was going.

 

“I—I know that.” She said unconvincingly.

 

“Do you? Do you really?”Jiyong took up the questioning. “While we would be thrilled to learn it was true we are not going to blame you and be upset with you if it is not true. I love you, Dear One loves you, nothing is going to change that. Look me in the eyes and tell me you believe that.”

 

Sinhae-a hesitated before looking at our Heart. She looked into his eyes briefly before busting into tears and nodding vigorously. “I believe that.” She gasped out.

 

“Good. Just don't forget it!” Ji told her softly.

 

“So when Dr. Lee comes back in here, no matter what he says, we will be okay. We will always have each other, for the ups and downs, agreed.” I asked them both.

 

They both nodded, “Agreed.”

 

“And thank you.” Our Little One told us softly. “I had been going round and round in my head, and I ended up in a bad place. Thank you both for taking my hand and leading me out of that place.”

 

“It is our job. Just the same as you and Dear One get me out of my head when I sink too far in.” Jiyong replied.

 

“And I am perfect so you do not have to do that with me.” I sassed back.

 

“Reeeaaalllyy?” Ji said, “You never have melancholy moods, where you do nothing of rethink past actions and drink a lot of wine?”

 

I laughed, “Of course I do, but that is part of my charm!”

 

Both of my spouses laughed and I felt happiness bloom in my chest at the sight.

 

“You are such a pabo!” Sinhae-a told me, lightly smacking my chest.

 

“Yes, but I am your pabo!” I answered blinking cutely at them both.

 

“I cannot believe that this fool may be a father.” Ji announced rolling his eyes. “I fear for the child's sense of humor!”

 

“Hey now!” I pouted, my bottom lip jutting out as far as I could make it.

 

“Oh, my...” Sinhae sighed dramatically. “None of us are fit to foster a child's sense of humor.”

 

“Now isn't that the truest thing I have ever heard you say!” Dr. Lee said startling us all as he came back into the room.

 

I felt Sinhae-a tense up immediately. Apparently, Ji noticed it too, as he spoke up, “No matter what, we will be okay.”

 

She relaxed a little, and I was satisfied with it, as all three of us were a bit tense with anticipation.

 

“Well, let me get to the point.” He paused to look at each of us. “The fast test came back positive. I have ordered the longer test and we are going to do an ultrasound as soon as they tell me our best tech is ready for us up here. There are several things that can cause a false positive, and with Sinhae-a's history I want to make sure this is what it appears to be. Are we in agreement with that course of action?” He looked at us as we all nodded, unable or unwilling to speak.

 

Positive...it was positive. My heart was beating so hard I thought surely it would do itself damage. Wait, there were things that could cause false positives? Dr. Lee seems eager to make sure it is really pregnancy and not the other things...that cannot be good...but he said positive!!!

 

The phone rang on his desk, Dr. Lee picked it up listened, thanked the person and hung up.

 

“Okay! Let's go have a look inside our Little Sinhae-a shall we?” He stood and gestured for us to follow him.

 

Jiyong stood and gave his hand to Sinhae as she stood. I stood and placed a hand in the middle of her lower back. Ji and I took a step forward but Sinhae did not budge.

 

“My brave Little One.” I prompted and she looked up at me with frightened eyes. “You are not alone, and we will be okay.” I said again.

 

“He said it was positive...Dr. Lee said positive.” She started to tremble. “Dr. Lee said positive.” She said again in disbelief.

 

“Baby, it is okay. We are going to go see what is in there! We are going to see our baby.” I told her, not knowing what was going through her head.

 

She smiled brightly at that for an instant before her face paled and she looked around frantically for a trashcan. She made it to the one by the door before dry heaving again.

 

When she was done she sat back and looked at us sheepishly, “Sorry.”

 

“No need to apologize. Here, take the water, and when we get to the ultrasound room I will go and get a syringe of nausea meds for you...don't worry they will be baby safe.” Dr. Lee said handing her a water bottle.

 

My Heart and I helped Little One to stand up, Ji tucking her hand into his arm while I kept my hand again at her back and we proceed down the hallway.

 

 

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Jiyong POV

 

I reach over to squeeze my Little One's hand where it rested on my other arm as we walked down the hallway together. I know she is in shock, she hasn't gotten past the fact that Dr. Lee said that the pregnancy test was positive. While I was excited to hear that, I also took in and understood his next words...there were other things that could cause a false positive, and Dr. Lee was concerned enough with our Little One's past medical history that he wanted to immediately do an ultrasound. The haste with which Dr. Lee was making things happen was also a red flag to me. Whatever it was that could cause a false positive AND cause vomiting had him truly worried, and that in turn worried me. I glanced over at Sinhae's face, still pale from the dry heaving but she wore a small smile on her lips and I prayed with all my might that the smile stayed there throughout the next hour, and beyond.

 

I looked over at Dear One as he looked my way and I recognized that he understood all that Dr. Lee had said as well. I winked at him and bit my bottom lip forcing myself not to show my concern on my face. He winked back, his eyes telling me all I needed to know.

 

He leaned down and kissed the top of Our Brave Little One's head and we came to a door. Dr. Lee opened the door and waited for us to enter. We walked into a light tan, warm feeling room. There in front of us was a table, or rather I should say a bed with a large piece of equipment to the left it. There was a tv screen on an adjustable arm for whom ever was laying on the bed to watch what was going on. There was also another TV screen mounted on the wall to the right of the bed. A pleasant looking woman stood beside what I assumed was the ultra sound machine.

 

“Hello, it is a pleasure to meet you, my name is Im Yoo-Ri, I am the ultrasound technician. Please come in. Sinahe-ssi, if you would be good enough to remove your pants, you can leave your underwear on, I can just pull them down as needed. If you would prefer a gown I can get that for you as well.”

 

Little One smiled at her and replied, “I have no problem with taking the underwear off as well if it make it easier for you, Dr. Lee you just need to turn around while I do so.” She smiled over at Dr. Lee.

 

Yoo-Ri-ssi looked confused but to her credit did not say a word. Seung-Hyun saw her confusion and asked, “Pardon me, Im Yoo-Ri-ssi, but have you signed the confidentiality agreement?”

 

“Ne, I have.”

 

“But nobody explained anything else to you?” He inquired.

 

“Explained what?” She questioned in return.

 

“Ummm, our unique relationship status.” Dear One said bluntly.

 

Dr. Lee spoke, “Yoo-Ri-ssi, I consider the three people in front of you now the same as my children. They are married and amaze me everyday with the strength of their marriage.”

 

“Okay, Dr. Lee...who exactly is married?” Im Yoo-Ri asked carefully.

 

“All three of them.” Dr. Lee answered.

 

“Wae?” Yoo-Ri asked perplexed, her face showing confusion and shock.

 

“Im Yoo-Ri-ssi, I would like to introduce myself,” Seung-Hyun-a began, “I am Choi Seung-Hyun, and this is my wife Sinhae-a Langston and this is my husband Kwon Jiyong-a.”

 

There was a moment of silence as poor Yoo-Ri contemplated this new information. We waited for her to respond in some way.

 

We had gone through this before, some smiled and accepted it at face value, some were obviously bothered by it but put on a happy face, some let the disdain they felt show through, others adopted a poker-face and we had no idea what they thought. What Im Yoo-Ri did next was a first for all of us.

 

She burst out laughing, not just a nervous giggle, but a full belly laugh. When she was able to calm down she managed to say, “Why in heaven's name would a woman want TWO husbands???? The ONE I have is quite enough for me!!!!!” She wiped the tears from her eyes and looked at us with a grin.

 

“You are one brave woman, Sinhae Langston! Not only did you marry two men, but two FAMOUS men! You are either brave or crazy! That has to be so hard, you all have my deepest respect! That I have never heard even the merest whisper of this is incredible...and I am a huge fan! I follow all the rumors! Mind you I do not believe them, but I follow them! Oh, all these rumors about that actress and G-Dragon, and here you are married to two people, neither of whom are that actress!!!!” She bowed a full 90 degrees. “I am now an even bigger fan, of all three of you! Now, shall we get back to business? Sinhae, off with the bottoms and up on the table, as I like to say.” She grinned and went back to getting the machine ready as we stood there in a pleasantly surprised stupor and no small amount of relief.

 

“While Sinhae strips down and gets settled on the table I will go and get the anti-nausea shot. I shall knock before re-entering.” Dr. Lee smiled and left the room quietly.

 

He left and Sinhae-a went over to the table to undress put the gown on and hop up. I took the opportunity to speak with Seung-Hyun-a without Little One hearing.

 

“Dr. Lee seems scared of what it might be if it isn't truly a pregnancy.” I blurted out in a hushed whisper.

 

“Ara, my love. But we cannot jump to conclusions. Let us just see what the ultrasound tells us before we go borrowing trouble. Okay?” He gazed into my eyes, and I felt the knot in the pit of my stomach loosen. The feeling of dread lifted slightly. “Remember what you said, nothing else matters and we will be okay.”

 

I exhaled deeply, “Yes. Okay...we can do this.” I looked up into his eyes and said, “In just a few minutes we might just get the first glimpse of our child.” I felt my eyes well up and I had to swallow back the emotion that threatened to engulf me.

 

“I know...” He pulled me to him and hugged me fiercely, and I hugged back just as tightly.

 

“Hey, now! Bring the hugging over here! I don't want to be left out!” Sinhae-a complained as she settled the gown over her shoulders, “Besides, I need help fastening this thing.”

 

She was trying to reach behind her to tie a myriad of strings, her brow creased in concentration and annoyance.

 

Im Yoo-Ri looked up from the ultrasound machine and smiled, “No, my dear, it fastens in the front, so I have easy access to your abdomen.”

 

“Oh. Now I just feel stupid.” Her cheek flushed a pretty shade of pink and she ducked her head in embarrassment.

 

“Please don't! I forgot to tell you...and when I forget to tell first time ultrasound patients they almost always do what you just did.” She soothed Sinhae as she helped her turn it around.

 

Seung-Hyun took my hand squeezing it in support leading me over to where they were now finished gowning our wife.

 

“Okay, hop up.” Yoo-Ri patted the table.

 

“Sure thing. I can't wait to--” Sinhae stopped speaking suddenly her eyes growing large and panicked.

 

“Trashcan!” I yelled. “Quick!”

 

With the reaction that bespoke of years of nursing Yoo-Ri quickly and deftly snatched her rubbish bin and handed it to Sinhae just in time to have the little bit of water she had consumed make a return appearance.

 

My poor dear wife didn't stop retching after expelling the water, her body just kept convulsing in on itself. Sinhae fell to her knees and Dear One and I went with her. I held her from the back my face turned away from the view and I hummed as loudly as I could, both to sooth her and distract me from the sounds. Dear One did much better her head, talking to her from the side and letting her know we were here with her. After what seemed like forever, she kind of slumped to the side exhausted, her body limp from the exertion. She was shaking and I realized she was crying. I turned my head back to look at her and our Dear One. Seung-Hyun had Sinhae's head on his chest, wiping the tears away as fast as they came. I sat up slightly so I could rub her back, knowing it helped her calm down.

 

“I'm so tired of this...my muscles hurt so badly from heaving when there is nothing left to come out.” She whimpered.

 

“If you two could manage to get her up to the table I can give her this shot, which should stop the heaving.” Dr. Lee said, startling me as I hadn't heard him come back in.

 

Seung-Hyun-a and I stood pulling Sinhae along with us. I silently told him that I could get her, and he released his grip as I swung her up into my arms. I carefully set her on the table where she stayed in the fetal position. I removed my arm from under her legs but I left my arm under her neck for the time being, pillowing her head.

 

I squatted down to be at her eye level and looked at my tired, weary wife and smiled, “I love you. I am so sorry you have been so sick.” I leaned my head to rest against hers, “Dr. Lee will help you...I am so sorry I haven't been useful to you during all the pukey times.” I kissed her forehead, which I noticed was warm and clammy.

 

I stood up after Dr. Lee had administered the shot. “I think she has a fever.”

 

Dr. Lee felt her forehead and nodded in agreement. “I agree. I will get some fever reducer in here along with some pain meds and an IV. Let's get you re-hydrated, and some vitamins and nutrients back into you. I hate to say it buuuuut...I would feel better if you stayed overnight no matter what.”

 

“I knew I was going to be stuck here when I walked in the door, so yeah...whatever.” My Little One said in defeat.

 

“Sinhae-ssi, I am going to need you to lay flat on your back with your legs flat for the ultrasound, do you think your muscles can do that or should we wait for the pain meds?” Im Yoo-Ri asked her.

 

“Give me a minute and I should be able to do that...I just need to get my muscles to relax.”

 

Her tone was was pitiful, it made me heart ache for her. I looked over at our Dear One, at a loss of what to do.

 

He came over to stand behind me, reaching around me lay a hand on our Little One's head. He didn't say a word, just let us both know with his touch that we were all here together.

 

Sinhae-a let out a long breath, consciously relaxing her muscles. “Okay, just let me shift around.” she said resolutely. I reached out to assist in any way I could and soon she was in position.

 

Nurse Im adjusted the gown before warning, “This is going to be cold, so brace yourself.”

 

Sinhae in her breath at the feeling but smiled up at us. “Are you guys ready for this?”

 

We smiled back at her, as Nurse Im spoke while staring at her screen, “Oh my...”

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A/N: Please forgive the long absence of an update. As you all know I had surgery on my wrist, and while healing well, I hit a rather large bump in the road when I was slammed into by a small well meaning child who was glad to see me...however the child knocked me off balance and I started to fall, I did what comes naturally and put out my hand to brace myself against the wall to avoid falling...not such a good thing to do. They had to go in again and suss out the damage. All that to say, typing hasn't been a pleasant thing for me. I will continue plugging away at the story a little at a time. It is frustration to have all this stuff in my head and not have hands to put it on the page. Please continue to support this work and I will do all I can to post as soon as I can get it typed.