I didn’t know it until the next day, but those girls had followed us home. They made sure I knew they’d seen me with a handwritten note taped to the door, demanding me to leave their ‘precious CAP oppa alone’ or they would make him leave me. I crumpled the note up and threw it away without a second thought.

The next day, instead of a note, there was a picture of me and Min Ki talking to Minho. I saw the term ‘idol-killer’ in the caption. I wrote them back and let them know that they would have to do better than that. Once I stood up to them, I didn’t hear from them again.

Things were going smoothly. I got a job at a magazine of all places. The pay wasn’t the best, but the job was interesting. I heard a lot of gossip, and even made some up my own, and Min Ki was doing well in preschool. He came home everyday talking about his new friends and what they’d done that day.

Speaking of Min Ki, his birthday was coming up. My mom and CAP’s mom decided to team up and plan a birthday party. They wouldn’t tell me anything they were planning, a fact that worried me. I had a distinct feeling they were going to go overboard.

Regarding CAP and the rest of the boys, the response was actually very positive, minus a few minor incidents. It seemed the fans were glad to see them growing up. A subunit of the fanclub actually sent a bunch of toys and stuff for Min Ki to headquarters. It was one of the nicest things anyone had done for me. The same group plastered their website with the pictures Chunji uploaded of Min Ki and CAP playing with the toys.

Now that I was working and Min Ki was going to school, I didn’t have as much free time as I was used to. I liked it for mainly the reason that I didn’t have time to think. Even so, we were both got a break at the same time so CAP and I took the weekend before Min Ki’s birthday and went off for a mini vacation.

“Stop!” I shrieked. “Stop it~” CAP continued tickling me as I tried to push him away. We had to leave early in the morning so we were trying to go to sleep at a decent time…or at least I was. For some reason, CAP was bitten with a happy bug and wanted to play around like he was sixteen years old.

I shrieked and wiggled, trying to get away but he held me tight with one arm and attacked me with his free hand. I tried to fight back when he suddenly stopped and practically pushed me away.

“Sorry,” he muttered hastily.

“Huh?” I was thoroughly confused. I moved closer to him and figured out the problem, namely that he’d gotten a bit . He kept muttering and trying to apologize so I just kissed him to make him shut the hell up.

When I pulled away we stared at each other, all mirth suddenly disappearing. His eyes were darker than usual. One of his arms s its way around my waist and pulled me closer to him for another kiss. It had been a while since I’d been this intimate with anyone in a long time so I was enjoying it more than I probably should have. CAP’s eyes met mine again with a question in them. For a moment I hesitated, but I eventually nodded and we spent the rest of the night doing anything but sleeping.

*****

It was Min Ki’s birthday and I was glad his grandmothers had taken charge of everything. Recently, my mind had been on overload so to only have to show up on time with the birthday boy in tow was a big weight off my shoulders.

The reason I was so out of it was because of CAP. Ever since that night the past weekend things between us had been different. I mean, he was the still great guy he’d been up to this point, but I just didn’t feel the same when he greeted me with a kiss as I had before. It just seemed like a routine thing to me and I was wondering if he’d been feeling the same. He was weirdly aloof sometimes when we were together. As long as Min Ki was around we were fine, but alone it was a different story.

I shook melancholy thoughts from my mind and got ready to take Min Ki over to CAP’s mom’s house. Min Ki was excited that he was going to a party. He chattered away without a care in the world as we made our way.

When we walked into the house, Min Ki was immediately snatched away. First CAP’s mom, then mine wanted to have him and take a thousand pictures. Then each woman had to go around and brag about him to her friends. I found a corner to just sit and watch it all. CAP’s mom was doing way too much right now and I briefly questioned whether she should be so active when she still wasn’t one hundred percent recovered.

“Hey noona.” I looked up to see P.O. standing over me. He grinned, pulled a chair up, and updated me on his group’s comeback. It was soothing to hear his voice even if I wasn’t being fully attentive.

“What happened this time?”

“Huh?”

He gave me a look that rivaled Chan Hee’s. “You have that look that says either something has happened or something is about to happen,” he explained.

“Really? Oh. It’s nothing.”

“You’re lying to me. Something’s going on with you and CAP hyung, but if you don’t want to tell me then I’ll understand. I mean, I was your only friend for three years…”

Damn this kid and his cuteness. He knew I couldn’t win against him. “Nothing happened per se, but…I don’t know. I’m not sure this is working out.”

“Wait, you don’t like hyung anymore?”

. I looked up to see L.Joe with a blue and green wrapped box in hand standing next to Chunji.

“I never said that. You shouldn’t be eavesdropping anyway,” I added.

L.Joe walked away, but Chunji just stood there with this stupid smirk on his face. As much as I really wanted to smack it away I knew that not only would that be a bad idea, but there had to be a reason why he was looking at me in that way. I excused myself from P.O. and let Chunji pull me away.

“Hyung wouldn’t like you keeping things from him,” he said.

I rolled my eyes. “There’s nothing to keep from him. Besides, what happens in our relationship is none of your business unless it affects you and this has nothing to do you with you.”

“I’m not the bad guy here noona.”

“You sure are acting like it,” I shot back.

“Look, I’m just saying that you and hyung should have a talk soon. You might find out that you’re on the same page.” That statement had me confused but I didn’t get a chance to respond. CAP came to find me and when he did, kissed my forehead and pulled me away to cut Min Ki’s cake and open presents.

Although I’m a bit ashamed, I was sad through that whole part. I couldn’t believe that my baby was already four years old. He’d be going to kindergarten soon. I distinctly remembered those nights when he was first born, when I was trying to take care of him while not really knowing how to take care of myself, and here he was surrounded by all these people who really cared about him. It was the tiniest bit overwhelming for me so I went outside to get some fresh air (and to let some tears out without being caught).

The cool breeze helped me calm down, so I decided to stay out until someone came looking for me. I was beyond surprised that the person turned out to be none other than Cha Sunwoo.

“Baro!” My heart fluttered just a little when he smiled at me. “Sunwoo, what are you doing here?”

“Your mom called. I wasn’t sure if I should show up or not, but it was the only legitimate way I had to see you so I took the opportunity. I hope you don’t mind.”

My body moved without my brain’s consent. The next thing I knew, my arms were around his neck and I was breathing in his scent-warm and familiar and as comforting as ever. My eyes flooded with tears for a different reason. “I missed you,” I said quietly.

“I missed you too,” he replied. “I’m sorry too. I…I didn’t handle everything in the best way. Even if Min Ki wasn’t mine, I should have stayed close to you. Can you forgive me?”

I nodded. “I’m just so glad to see you here now. I don’t care about everything else.”

“How are you and CAP anyway?”

Guilt made its presence known in my gut. “We’re…together, I guess, and working on being the best parents we can be.”

“That’s good for the little one.”

An awkward silence followed. It had never been awkward between Baro and me before so I really had no idea what to do.

“There’s another reason I came here,” Baro finally said.

“Which is?”

“I’m going to the military.”

“What!?”

“I’ve been thinking about this a lot. I mean, I have to go anyway, but I think it would be best if I went now. I’ve been- You’ve been on my mind a lot and I’d rather leave before I do something I really regret.”

“Something like what?” I asked with a slight challenge in my voice.

“Like this…”

He had eaten a cherry er before coming to see me. I could faintly taste the candy as his lips pressed against mine. By habit, my arms went around his neck and I could feel his hands on my hips as the kiss deepened. My heart started beating triple time. When he pulled away we were both breathing hard.

“Do you regret it?” I asked him.

“No,” he answered immediately, “which means I really should go before I get you in trouble.”

I nodded. I stared at the ground as he walked away, sure that if I watched him I’d try to call him back. After counting to thirty in my head, I went back in to the party. Luckily, everyone was so wrapped up in spoiling Min Ki rotten that no one even paid attention to me. CAP came and stood next to me, threading his fingers through mine.

“You okay?” he leaned over and whispered in my ear.

“I’m fine. It’s just that I remember him as a baby and now he’s gotten so big.”

“You’re such a girl,” he teased.

“Oh hush up,” I said with a little push.

“Did you see Baro hyung? He was here just a second ago.”

My throat went dry. “Yeah, I ran into him.”

“Are you sure you’re okay? You look like you’re getting sick.”

“I’m fine, I promise,” I said, but inside I was having a mental war.

I can’t handle this! I can’t handle this! CAP…why can’t you just realize that you don’t like me like you think you do? Then I could go run after Baro.

No. Baro isn’t important. Maybe he was, once upon a time, but you are happy with CAP and Min Ki enjoys being with his father.

Min Ki didn’t even know his father until recently. What difference would it make? This is Baro. He loves me. He still loves me and no matter how much I try to deny it, I still love him too. I want Baro…I need him in my life.

What you need is to stop acting like a teenager and grow the hell up. You are stable and relatively happy. Don’t uproot everything because of that squirrel boy.

He’s a squirrel prince not a boy.

I shook my head to shut up the voices that were arguing inside it. I did not need to be going off on a tangent when I was already thinking in circles. Luckily, the party was starting to break up and it was time to go. The birthday boy was knocked out as we made our way back home, this time with CAP. When we got home, surprisingly there were a few fan gifts by the door. I took Min Ki to his room and put him to bed. CAP was sitting in the living room with a serious face on. I sat down next to him and he said four words that made my blood run cold.

“We need to talk.”