Hyukjae’s POV

I couldn’t sleep at all. He kept bothering my head.

I wanted to know what actually has happened. But, it’s impossible if I ask him.

I don’t want him to think that I still care to him.

I took a bath and went down.

‘Good morning young master.’

‘Morning.’ I went to the dinning room.

‘Where is Donghae?’ Yes, now I finally could say his name.

‘He has gone from 4.00 AM.’

‘What?!’

‘Yes, he has a new part-time job. He has to deliver newspaper in the morning, after that he will go to school.’

‘Deliver newspaper??’ I asked.

‘Yes.’

I ate my food, even though I know that this food is really delicious, I can’t feel it.

I’m full of curiosity of him.

NO! I’m not care to him. I am just curious.

I got up from my seat and wanted to go out from dinning room.

I went to university and parked my car.

‘Lee Hyukjae.’ I heard someone was calling me.

‘Oh hay Heechul hyung.’ I smiled to him.

He approached me and looked at me, but he didn’t say anything.

‘What?’

‘I just want to tell you something.’

‘Tell me about what?’

‘About Donghae’s schedule.’ He smiled to me.

‘What? Why I need to know that? And why you know about that?’

‘He wakes up at 3.00 A.M in the morning. He goes to deliver newspaper at 4.00 AM. At 8.00 AM he has to go to university. After that he will do part-time job at Sapphire Blue Café until 9.00 PM. After that he finally goes home. He has to clean the house until 12.00 AM and finally he can sleep.’

‘What do you mean about this?’

‘Nothing.’ He smiled to me.

‘He told you something right? Like I torture him, make him sad, bla blaa blaa…’

‘No. He didn’t, I just guess it and I think I’m true. I know you hate him because what he has done to you. But it’s not the Lee Hyukjae I used to know. Lee Hyukjae is a person that has a warm heart, beautiful smile, and never let people near him sad.’

‘He has changed me to become like this.’

‘No. You’re the one who has changed yourself. Every people have the reason about something they did before and I bet he has too.’

‘I don’t want to hear anything from him anymore.’ I never want to let him talk about his reason to me. Once he leaved me, it means that he has leaved me. Is there a reason or not, it’s not my business. He has ruined my trust.

‘What if that’s something important? You still don’t want to hear it?’

“Even though he tells me that he was dying until he wanted to die, so he leaved me, I still don’t believe him. Because I know clearly, he must be lying to me.’

‘How you can be so sure?’

‘Because I hate him from the bottom of my heart.’ I saw Heechul hyung and it’s the first time I saw him so sad.

‘I don’t want to see you sad again Hyukjae.’ He saw me. I could feel the sincerity in his voice.

‘Sad? Why? I will not be sad because I make him like this.’

‘You’re wrong Hyukjae. I will be not angry with you, because I know you have been through such a difficult moment when he leaved you. But, please don’t treat him like this.’

‘Since when the great Diva Kim Heechul begs with someone?’

‘Since I know I’m such a lucky person.’

‘What??’

‘Nothing, please you can ignore him. Act like he doesn’t exist at all, but don’t make him like that.’

‘I’m not the person who asks him to take many part-time jobs!’ I raised my voice and I know he will be angry in no time.

‘He takes it because he needs money.’ Wow! He’s not angry with me??

‘My mother always gives him a big amount of money! Is it not enough for him?’

‘Lee Hyukjae. I’m patient enough to talk to you, begging to you, and say nice things to you. But now, I will talk to you like a true Kim Heechul. He never uses your money. You can check at his room. He never takes even though one dollar from the money that your mom has given to him. He does part-time job because he needs some money to life. He never wants my help, even though I was desperate enough to help him.’

‘STOP HYUNG! I don’t want to hear such a nonsense .’

I turned my body and wanted to walk away.

‘He asked the maid to move his room to the first floor because he feels that he’s just a maid, a slave, and nothing in your house. And the most important thing is, he is scared of a big room. You know that very clearly, he couldn’t sleep if there’re not anybody beside him and sleeping in such a big room, alone, is his nightmare. He doesn’t want to take a car to university because it’s not his. He begged to me to pretend that I didn’t know him, because he didn’t want to trouble you. I love him so much! He is my favorite dongsaeng as always. I know him really well, but you know him more than me. You know what the things he doesn’t like or like, love or hate, scared or not.’

‘HYUNG! PLEASE STOP!’ I really wanted to go out from there, but my body didn’t hear me.

I kept standing here and listen every word that he had said.

 ‘Treat him like this will not save you from your broken heart. You have to admit, like or not, love or not, even though it’s just a little amount, you’re happy that he came back to your life.’

‘What the hell??’ I turned my body again and faced him.

‘I’m not happy at all! I hate the fact that he had to come to my life again. I’m ok when he didn’t come back, but now!! The more I see him, the more I hate him.’

‘You’re disappointed, but you don’t hate him. The more you see him, the more you hate yourself because you can’t reach him, you can’t hug him, kiss him, love him, because you’re afraid that you will lose him again.’

‘You’re not me! I know my heart very well.’

He looked so sad. I knew he really wanted to be angry but he suppressed his anger.

‘Can you let him go?’

‘What?’

‘You know that he will leave you again in a few months later. You can let him go?’

‘It’s better if he never came to my life. Go or not, I don’t care, it doesn’t have any effect to me at all.’

I turned my body again and I kept walking before he was saying something again.

‘Lee Hyukjae!’ He shouted to me.

‘What’s again??’

‘Follow your heart and never let your ego takes your heart! Treat him well! I entrust him to you.’

I just kept walking. I didn’t have a mood to study, thanks to Heechul hyung.

I finally went home. I decided to take some rest.

But Heechul hyung’s word kept playing on my head. Is it true that he doesn’t use that money at all??

I went to his room and locked it from inside.

His room is small. It’s the smallest room in my house. There are not many things in this room.

I opened his cupboard and I didn’t find many clothes in there.

I opened the drawer and found so much money and his saving book.

‘He never takes the money, and I bet it’s all the money that my mom has given to him.’

So, is Heechul hyung true?

I got out from his room and met my maid.

‘Oh, good afternoon young master. Do you need something?’

‘Where are all the clothes that he has?’

‘Hmm?’

‘My mom has bought him so many clothes to wear, but I just found a little amount in there.’

‘Oh. He didn’t want to use it and asked us to save him.’

‘Why?’

‘I don’t know young master. He just gave it back to us and used to clothes that he has brought.’

I had to know what his reason is! I can’t life like this.

I took my jacket and drove my car to Sapphire Blue Café.

I made a disguise so that he could not recognize me. I came in to the café and sat down at the corner.

‘Excuse me sir. What do you want to order?’ I saw him was standing in front of me.

‘Strawberry juice.’

‘Ok. Please wait a minute.’

He went out from my sight. He still has some bruises on his face. But it’s not as bad as before.

I waited and waited until he has done his work.

‘Donghae, you don’t need to come tomorrow if you don’t fell well.’

‘It’s ok sir. I’m fine.’ I heard he was talking with someone.

‘Ahh… it’s freezing.’ He whispered but I could hear because I was not too far from him.

He walked and I followed him. As usual, he’s such a clues person. He didn’t know that I follow him.

He stopped in front of restaurant, he looked but he didn’t come.

‘Don’t eat something like that Lee Donghae! You don’t have enough money to eat something like that.’ I heard him saying that words to himself.

He kept walking and found a person who sells sweet potatoes, and finally he bought it.

Does he only have sweet potatoes as his dinner?

He stooped in front of bus stop.

‘If I take a bus now, I can’t take a bus to university tomorrow. It’s better if I walk to home this night.’

Walking through the house? Is he crazy???

He kept walking and walking, he sang a song along the way, but suddenly he stopped.

‘Waahh.. such a beautiful stars.’ He looked to the sky and smiled.

‘God, please protect Lee Hyukjae the one that I love, the person I treasure a lot. Give him much happiness to live on. Bring smile to him and make him always happy. And please let him has a greatest live in this world. Bring him back his gummy smile, his kindness, his sweet personality, his caring. I’m such a bad person who makes him like this. I don’t ask your forgiveness, but please make him happy…’

He smiled to the sky. Among so much prayer that he could say, why he has always put the interests of others than himself?

I walked near him and I saw him shut his eyes.

I saw tears flowing from the corner of his eye, he smiled and whispered something,

‘If I can exchange my life with his happiness, I will exchange it, if the only way to make him happy is to disappear from his life forever, and I’ll do it. And please make him forget about me.’

Hehehehe...

I updated again this story. I had so many ideas about this story, so I updated it first...

I will update my other story a few days later :)

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