I froze at the door thinking it might never happen, but it happened.

"Shocked to see me?" She asked with a smirk on her face.

I blink my eyes couple of times.

No, it's impossible.

"Are you not gonna invite me in? Cause I'm going in whether you let me or not. It's freezing like hell here." That woman snorted in annoyance.

It can't be her....

"Yah! Fany Fany Tiffany!!" She's out of patience.

"Tae... Taeyeon? Kim Taeyeon?" I stammered in disbelief.

"No, my name is Hwang Miyoung you idiot mushroom!! Don't block my way!" And I was pushed to the side as she running in, hastily slapping the snow off her boots.

I close the door and turn around to see her short figure, this stupid midget hasn't changed at all. I let out a long sigh thinking either me or her will have a lot of explaining to do.

"Ho... how did you get here Taeyeon?" I asked in tremulous voice.

"Iron man took me here from Seoul in 10 seconds, what do you think? After like forever long in the plane, i took a cab of course."

"No... you know that's not what I mean. How did you know this place? How did you find here.."

"You and I are gonna have a serious talk about this later. Now, where's your toilet?"

"All the way in the kitchen then turn left." I pointed my finger at the kitchen way, and she stormed in fast leaving me dumbfounded.

I shake my head carrying her small luggage and put it near the couch before making my way following behind slowly. I take out a small cup from the kitchen cabinet, preparing another drink. A cup of warm sweet tea will be nice especially for the one who just got off the plane came from the other side of the world. She just came from Korea. I should've asked how she was doing since we hadn't seen each other for about a year instead of the question earlier, no wonder she looked pissed.

Seoul.

It would be a big fat lie if I wasn't curious about a certain person's well being.

How is she?

Did she ever miss me?

My fingers tighten gripping a tea spoon, the urge of questioning this midget right away is crazily hunting me. 

I miss her...

"So this is the place where you've been hiding this whole year huh?"

I turn around to see my best friend. She places her coat on a chair before taking look around, examine my old house. I used to live here when I was very young until my mother passed away which had given my whole family a big incureable wound, then we started a new life in New York. We never told people about this place.

"I'm not hiding, just wanted to be alone." I said.

"Your family?"

"They just went out." I place her tea on the table. "Here. Are you hungry?"

She knits her eyebrows before laughing instead of answer my question, it was a funny question anyway.

"I suppose you are, there's some leftovers this morning, I'll just heat it up."

"Owh c'mon, that's just not what you're really concerned about heh?" She grinned.

"Well, if you still can come out your usual sarcasm complete with an annoying smirk like that, i believe you're doing just as fine. No need to ask anymore right?"

"Nah... That's not it either. You know you have something to ask, my best friend."

"....."

"....."

"Ho... how is she doing?"

"Tiffany, don't you think you owe me something?"

"Okay, okay... I'm sorry. I left, I didn't contact you guys. I made you worry, I was wrong. Forgive me?"

"You're forgiven." She smiled finally after a long silence that feels like eternity. "As for your question... well, she's pretty good, remarried with a child and living her happy life now." She continued then took a sip of her tea while looking at somewhere else.

The sentence was like a big stab through my heart. I had already expected that, now it became true but I still can feel my heart thump painfully against my chest.

"Is that so...? Ni.. nice to hear that." I look down controlling something coming out from my eyes.

"Yeah, she finally found her own happiness, isn't that what you always hope for?"

I turn around pretending to find sugar near the sink though i don't even need it in my coffee.

"Ye.. yeah..." I replied trying to sound casually. "Did you do what I requested?" I asked again despite it's not what I really care about right now.

"What request? The list in the paper? Your house, all your shares of stocks in Korea, and everything would be under her name automatically?"

          She is living a happy life now...

"I don't know.... yeah... maybe..." I muttered feeling a single tear just rolls down my cheek and I don't bother to wipe it. My mind started go blank.

          The life that I couldn't give her...

"Still in process. The paper says everything will be under Jessica's name after she sign it."

          She is happy, I should be happy too right?

"The thing is, she hasn't signed it yet."

          I should be happy too... what?

I snap from the thought and turn my head looking at Taeyeon. Did I hear her right?

"Yes, you heard me." She said with lips forming a curve. Another laugh again. "Haha.. got you!! You should see your face in a mirror now.."

If this wasn't my house I would probably think there's a hidden camera show by the way she pulls the prank and laughs like theres no tomorrow.

"Yah!!! Kim Taeyeon?!"

"Well, think it as my small revenge against what you did to us."

"You stupid midget! How could you..." My expression has changed from confused to angry. She then hugged me before I could get something to throw right on her face.

"Its nice to see you again my best chingu. How are you?" I gasped at her sudden attitude changing, but smile gradually. It's nice to know my midget friend is still the same the way she was.

"I'm good, but.. wait... what do you mean she hasn't signed it yet?" I carefully asked.

"Well, if you really think she would be happy after you left, you're wrong Fany-ah, so wrong."

"What happened?"

"We tried to find you, Tiffany. We went to every place you might possibly headed to, but we failed. Until jessica remembered about your old house you once told her. I have some contacts in California you know. They travelled around tracking your trace, spent a year. And now here I am. We've found you."

"But... why...?"

She handed me an envelope from her purse.

"This is why."

I quickly grab it to know it is a letter...

Dear Tiffany,

I wish I had a chance to apologize properly. I didn't know you would leave without a word, this kind of punishment is too much for me to take, but I deserve it. Sometimes I really wish I could see things just like the way you do, optimistic. Then today you would be here together with me.

I was a selfish stupid coward. I had never given myself a chance to try. Knowing you and your kindness could touch my heart deeply and slowly the walls in my heart started to break, all I did was to build more walls in between to protect myself. But the more defenses I made, they just hurt both of us even more.

I don't know when you will read this, probably never. But i decided to write it, to finally let you know how i feel for you. It might have been too late, by the time you read this you might have already found someone new, someone better, someone who deserves you more, at least you get to know i once had the same feeling for you too.

The things you had ever done for me, i hope you don't regret them. It doesn't matter if you finally moved on and have forgotten me entirely, i just wish you don't regret you had loved me once. If the paper you left on the table meant there's no chance for us to start over, do let me know please. If it's a real goodbye from you, I will sign it by then.

The memories I had with you are bittersweets, but I love them, they'll always remind I was truly loved by a girl and she was someone wonderful, I will never forget her for the rest of my life.

Yes, I have loved you too and will always do, until I die.

Jessica.

I cupped my mouth with my fingers. My tears just couldn't stop coming out. There's so many feelings mixed at the same time. I read it again and again and again. Is this true? She loves me too? It feels like a dream. I don't want to wake up if it's really a dream. Right at the moment I couldn't think of anything else again. Finally....

"Taeyeon... I need a ticket... now..."

***

I stand at the gate. After 12 hours long in the plane and 1 hour in a cab, normally I should be feeling exhausted right now. But the excited feeling overwhelmed my fatigue, it kept me awake even in the plane where other passengers would prefer slumbering in deep sleep instead of keep reading the same letter in passion over and over again, especially the last sentence.

I walk in carefully. I was crazily thinking how I should greet her. Will she be excited to see me? Will she be surprised? I take out a small mirror, making sure of my make up, shirt and hair look good before i press the bell.

No one answered.

I press again and hear the voice that always like a melody in my ear answering at the other side of the door.

"I'm coming."

I can’t wait to see her beautiful face so I ring it again without patience.

The door is opening with a girl wearing a thin white shirt and training pants, wet hair with a towel on her head signing she just came out from shower, and mouth uttering something in displeasure…

"I said I was coming Krystal... You are so impatient..." She then paused, shocked and stayed silent.

"Hi... Jessi.." I smiled.

T B C