They had landing, Chanyeol let out sighed. He excused himself first and went to hotel he had booking a day before. He patted Kris’s shoulder and ruffled Naeun’s hair. His family butler was already waiting for them. They followed him to car. Naeun wanted to start conversation, but she held herself because she knew it would be more awkward and Kris too drown in his own thought. Kris didn’t say anything even when they arrived at his house. After he hugged his mother and greeted his father, he walked straight to his room.

His mother shook his head in disapprove at his behavior. Naeun was on her way to her room when she suddenly heard noises from Kris’ room. Without gave much thought she ran to Kris’ room and found Kris stood there, his room was already messed up. She was familiar with this sense, same situation when she found Kris cried a long time ago. She closed the door and locked it.

She was still contemplated what to do the next. Something caught her eyes; Kris wrist was full of blood. The mirror was scattered. Naeun walked to his side and grabbed his wrist, but he yanks away.

Knock…. Knock….

“Kris, are you okay? What’s going on?” His mother voice was full with worry.

Naeun looked up to see Kris, but he looked away.

“Kris !!!! Open the door” His mother knocked forcefully.

“Lao Ma is okay, I just clumsily broke the vas” Naeun shouted ratherly cheerfully. Fake one, she could deal with the mirror latter.

“But I heard…….”

“It’s totally fine here, Lao Ma. Kri…. Yifan-ge is in the toilet now” She bite her lower lip as she lied.

“Okay then, just make sure you two are in good term”

Pabo, Lao Ma must think we have a fight.

Naeun let out breathe that she was holding unconsciously.

“Out” Kris said. Naeun shook her head. She didn’t care if Kris would be mad or hate her more.

“Let me take care of your wound first” Her voice was stern. She opened the drawer search for aid kit when she found it she kneeled down in front of Kris who sat on the bed.

“It’ll be hurt, bear with it”

Kris didn’t say a single words and let Naeun treated his wound. Naeun placed the aid kit back in the drawer.

“You can go now” Kris demanded when she saw Naeun reached the books and and another things that lying on the floor.

“I said out” Kris shouted. The book she was holding fall to the floor, she pressured tears from falling down. She continued what she was doing.

“Why you are so persistent?”

This the right time to confront him

“Why do you hate me that much?” She looked straight in Kris’ eyes. Kris was speechless, he didn’t hate her. He never hates her. Kris tried to find the good sentences, but words already disappeared from his brain.

She needed the answer. She couldn’t live with his cold personal without knew the reason behind it.

“I don’t hate you, I just don’t like you. What do you want me to do some intruder came to my peace live as only child and took all my parents attention; without my agreement  she will becomes my fiancée and soon to be my wife. And now she places herself as victim in front of me?”

He could see how hurt Naeun in her eyes. It’s hard for him to say that, he regretted what he said, but he wouldn’t take back his words. He decided pushes her away and another reason to pushes her has added, Jessica.

“I understand. You don’t need to through that if I didn’t come to your live at first place, that’s what you are going to say. I get the hind, don’t worry I fully understand” She turned her heels.

Kris was watching her walked. Her shoulder was shaking, she was crying. Kris took deep breathe and muttered “sorry” in whisper.

“Yi Fan ge” Her voice was shaky. He was sure she wiped her tears roughly, he could see the reddish cheek when he looked to her face.

She bowed 90 degree.

“Thanks for everything, Yi Fan ge” He could hear how shaky her voice, he watched till her back disappeared. He messed his brown lock.

Kris called Chanyeol and told him everything. Chanyeol was really mad at him.

“I will be there in 15 minutes”

Kris was lying on his bed; he closed his eyes and recall what happened earlier. He was too harsh.

“Chanyeol, you…..” It wasn’t Chanyeol who slammed his door. His father was standing there.

“Tsk…. She has already told you? How good she acts in front of me like she was feeling sorry, but behind me. I should have known her better” He shook his head in disbelief.

“You can blame me. I have enough with all of this bull” Kris added.

His father shook his head.

“We will cancel your engagement” His father walked away. Before he steps outside the room, he turned around.

“She didn’t tell us anything. As parents we can sense something odd happen. I came to get explanation; you have given me more than I need”

Chanyeol has heard everything. He bowed when Kris’ father saw him behind the door. He suppressed his anger when he saw Kris was sitting there with both hands on his face. He took sit on armchair.

“Satisfied?”

Uncomfortable silence envelopes them, but Chanyeol wouldn’t force Kris to speak. He didn’t know how long they just sat in there without letting single word. It must be long enough because Kris’ maid informed them that the dinner was ready. They walked beside each other in silent. His parents sat in the edge of table face each other. Naeun sat in the middle of dining table, Kris furrowed his eyebrows. Naeun usually sat beside his mother and his mother was nowhere to be seen, Kris took seat beside his father along with Chanyeol. The tense became unbearable for Chanyeol, too awkward for family diner, no one spoke just clang of knife and fork the source of voice. Chanyeol saw Kris’ father put his fork and knife down and wipes the remains food on corner of his lips. Chanyeol hold his breathe; he has prepared his self to face it. He ever saw how scary Kris’ father could be when he was in the edge.

“We have cancelled the engagement. Tomorrow, you can back to New York. Naeun and I will take the morning flight and you take afternoon flight. I have got the tickets” Kris was about to ask a question why his father have to go to New York, but he kept his question aside. As if read his son mind, he added.

“Naeun will continue her study at Seoul National University from now on. I’ll settle down what she needs” Kris widened his eyes.

“Baba, she…… “

“I get full scholarship offered there and it’s good one. It’s also international class so it’s okay with me and I miss South Korea and my parents” Naeun looked up and smiled little to Kris.

Don’t try to smile when you cry

Kris stood from his seat and grabbed Naeun’s wrist. Naeun didn’t push him and just followed where he goes, she was too tired. They were in Kris’ bedroom, Kris made Naeun sat on the couch, he took place in front of her.

“Princeton is your dream, you were really happy when you received the letter from Princeton. What are you trying to do exactly? Want to make me feel more guilty than I am?” Kris finally admitted.

“Don’t be. You aren’t the one that must feel that way. I can’t pay back what this family gives to me, even if give all my live it’s still not enough. To be part of…no.. to ever live with this family is one I praised a lot. Don’t worry you have not to bear with this stupid girl anymore, okay?” She gave peace sign. Kris didn’t know what he should do or he should say.

If I didn’t tell Kris-hyung, it wouldn’t be happen.

Their conversation was clear enough to be heard because Kris didn’t locked even closed the door.

“Kris ge” Kris snapped back from his thought. It was first time Naeun called him using his English name not the Chinese one.

“Finally I can call you by that, Yi Fan ge. Thanks for allowing me to call you that way” She smiled little wider. She excused herself when Chanyeol came. She bowed deeply to him, like said good bye to him.

“How is your wrist? Is it better?” Kris almost forgot about the wound if Chanyeol didn’t ask him.

“You have hurt yourself bad enough even you haven’t heal at all. Then you have hurt the others with your reckless. I ever said I’ll stand by you no matter what, I think I’ll take back my words for this situation. You pushed Jessica away; it’s 100% I can understand. You push Naeun away is something I really can’t understand. You were the one said your feeling wouldn’t change anything, but look after I told you Naeun knew Jessica and Tiffany. You throw her away like she was the villain in miserable live you take role in. Revenge…. Is it your revenge because of what Jessica did? For the shake of our friendship I never tell you how irritated I am with your sudden change. Where is Kris hyung that I know that cold outside, but warm inside. He was gone. I’m the only one that stands by your side after you pushed the other a side. No, I’m the only one that you allowed to still on your live. Suho hyung, Baekhyun, Luhan hyung, Xiumin hyung, Lay hyung, you pushed them away and now Naeun”

Kris closed his eyes. He didn’t need all of this to add headache he felt.

“Think of this hyung is it Jessica worthy enough that you have suffered a lot? Is it Jessica worthy enough that you need to hurt Naeun? Think carefully before you regret for the rest of your live” Chanyeol closed the door and leaves Wu’s mansion.

Tiffany, I need something to do before come back to New York. I’ll be back as soon as possible

Chanyeol send message to Tiffany.

Kris couldn’t sleep that night. He closed his eyes, but Chanyeol’s words kept him wake. He closed his eyes immediately when heard someone opened the door.

Naeun kneeled down beside him and touched his wrist carefully. She smiled tenderly.

“Next time don’t injure yourself gege. You’re bad at treat injury. Don’t sleep too late because it’s hard to wake you up in the morning. I’ll like to try your black coffee someday when we meet again. I have another inspiration books you must read. I want to be close to you, but who I am to dream it” She chuckled. Kris felt his chest tighten. With both of his hands, she brought Kris’ palm until touched her forehead.

“Gege, I never tell everyone this but I want you to know Princeton isn’t my dream, I never dreamed it gege. I spent all my time to study at my high school and did everything to pass the exam entrance wasn’t because of I want to psychologist like anyone think. At my third year of primary school, junior high school I ever heard you it’ll be cool to have psychologist as girlfriend and you said maybe one of student of Princeton will be the nice catch. I knew it’s joke, but that time I want to make you proud of me because at least you have sister attend the major. When Lao Ma told me that I’ll your wife in future, I don’t know what to do I developed my feeling for you as brother, but then it changes I see you like man not as brother. Is it love? What is love, anyway? All I want is to see your happiness and this family happiness. All of you mean everything for me. I don’t want leave this family, but if this can make you happy, I’ll do it without regret. Just promise me you will be happy after I go. It’s enough for me to see you cry once and injured yourself. Promise me that, Kris ge”

She stood and kissed Kris on the crown of his head.

“I’ll always pray for you. Good night, Kris ge”

Kris opened his eyes after Naeun left.