It’s 11 pm. Well, really it’s 11.13 pm.

I should be at home. Nice and comfy in my bed. Dreaming away. With the fluffy clouds and bright, colourful rainbows. If only Katy Perry’s California Gurls video was a real place. Oh what a wonderful life.

But no. Here I am, in an empty library, stuck in front my laptop, staring at a blank page. Not entirely blank of course, I’ve typed two lines. Two lines when I have a 1500 word essay due tomorrow. What am I doing to my life you ask? I don’t know.

I think internally I’m actually going through a mental breakdown, but it hasn’t completely hit me yet. Or I’m just really delusional and think I’m on calm mode. The result of three coffees and two bars of Snickers. Coffee with two sugars and no milk.

The Snickers was unnecessary but I couldn’t help myself.

OK, it is official, I’m crazy. Crazy. Why aren’t my fingers typing! Why! Why! Why!

Maybe I should take a walk. Yes, I’ll do that. A walk to clear my mind and get my blood pumping. And maybe, I’ll see him again.

Who you ask? A-ha, that’s a secret. OK, not so much a secret because Hyosung found out and she’s been pushing me to talk to him. But how the hell am I supposed to do that? I’ve never uttered more than two vowels to him, ‘Hel-lo’. We’ve exchanged some eye contact. But that’s the only form of acknowledgement really. And he’s friends with Himchan. Kim Himchan. Majoring in traditional Korean music, he is tall, suave and extremely good-looking.

So you can imagine how this guy I walk past all the time looks like. Still can’t? Watched Twilight? Jacob and his wolf pack. Jacob is Himchan and his buddies are the wolf pack. Even though I was entirely enthralled by Jacob’s body, I do remember that his wolf pack had some fine bodies.  

Alright, so I’m at the corridor and I can’t see him. Or hear him. From the few (maybe not few, like… every day for the past two weeks?) times I walked past there was always some sort of music that came out from the room. I search the other rooms. 

Oh my God, is he not here? Why wouldn’t he be here? Of all days, why would you not be here! Now I sound like some stalker. And I can’t have him find me under such circumstances. Not that I truly care whether he sees me or not. Oh, whatever. I’ll just go back and delve myself into the misery of my 1500 word essay.

I freeze as I hear the slight creaking sound from behind me. There’s hardly any light. I reach into my pocket for my phone. I can’t find it. Oh my God, why did I leave my phone in the library? I’m going to be attacked. There aren’t any security cameras in this area. They were going to reinstall it over the weekend. Why did I decide to stay this Thursday night?

I can’t have my last hours in school. I have to send my last requests to my parents. I haven’t gone to Disneyland. I haven’t climbed Mt. Everest. I didn’t finish cleaning my room. I have an essay to hand in tomorrow!

I can feel someone coming closer. Oh God, I’m going to die. I’m going to-

 “Are you lost?”

I’m not going to die. Yet.

I turn around and I see him in front of me. Oh good Lord, that hair. I so badly want to run my fingers through and feel how fluffy it is. And those eyes. They’re so deep and brown, like Willy Wonka’s chocolate river. And oh my God, he’s so gorgeous.

 “I can take you back to the library if you’d like.” I stop checking him out as his voice interrupts me.

My mind is blank. All I can see are his lips moving. Answer him, Jieun, speak. He looks at me expectantly.

 “Ah… I’m not lost,” I finally say. “I… lost my phone.” I mentally slap myself. What a ridiculous excuse, Song Jieun. Well done.

 “Did you drop it around here?” His eyes are searching the dark floor. I’m still frozen in my spot. I’m taking in the moment. The moment whereby I realise how I am totally falling so hard for this man.

 “Do you want me to call it?” he says. I look at him in a daze. “Don’t tell me your battery is dying.”

I shake my head. “I think I remember where I dropped it,” I croak. He steps back a bit and he looks… relieved? Damn it, I should not have rejected that walk back to the library. I want to zip my mouth.

 “Should we go get it?”

I nod and quietly follow behind him. So many things are going on in my mind. But the main thing is I like Bang Yongguk.

I seriously like him. I mean I didn’t think I did before because I was just harmlessly stalking him but now that my face is heating and my heart is literally wanting to jump out of my 34B cup s, that tells me otherwise.

I did say I was crazy, but now I am borderline maniac. This is why I have friends like Hyosung. They break the ice. I don’t have an ice pick so I can’t do that.

 “You’re Jieun right?” he asks. My heart surprisingly calms. I nod. “Yeah, I remember Himchan mentioning you. He’s out with Hyosung right now.”

 “Oh?” What? Why don’t I know this? Hyosung is with the Kim Himchan?

 “I just got a text message saying he managed to get her number. About time too.” He chuckles. Dear God, even his chuckles are enough to melt me. But I keep walking. “Do you remember where you left your phone?”

We’re approaching the library. I need to think fast. I can’t have him find my phone by my desk.

 “Uhh, why don’t you check by the audio section and I’ll… search around?” I suggest. He nods and sets off.

I run to my desk and find my phone. Right where I left it. I place it in my pocket and continue searching for the already found phone. When a good five minutes has passed, I come out and look for him.

 “I found it! I left it by the shelves over there.” He walks over and once again I am in awe. “Thanks for helping me.”

 “Not a problem.” He smiles. Awww, his gums show when he smiles. It’s so adorable. “Hey, I’m heading down to grab some coffee. Do you want one?”

I shake my head with a small smile. I'm sad. I guess this ends our night affair, Yongguk. Goodbye. Farewell. Adieu.

He stares back at me. Why isn’t he leaving? I did say no, didn’t I?

 “Are you sure?” he asks with a slight urgency.

Yes I’m sure. Of course I’m sure. I still have a good cup of coffee by my laptop and so what if it’s cold. It may not be iced coffee but it’s still drinkable. And at the rate of coffees I have been drinking today I think I could pee a lake of caffeine and-

.

I realise what he’s getting at. I am so dense.

I want to kick myself. Five times and an extra one as a bonus. He’s offering to buy coffee, you dimwit.

 “Two sugars, no milk,” I say. His face lights up and I am totally gooey.

 “OK. I’ll be right back.”

As he sets off I return to my place. I won’t lie; I am doing cartwheels in my head across a marigold field. Although in reality I am cartwheel-less. I can barely do a forward roll.

I happily skip and grab the now cold coffee and throw it into the bin. I sit in front of my laptop and my fingers are typing away. Words appear across my screen as I wait.

I see him coming closer with two coffees in his hand. He hands it to me and then sits himself across me.

I am not prepared for this. Is he going to sit here for long? My brain is on overdrive again. 

 “So, what do you think about Hyosung and Himchan?”

I blink.

 “I guess they’d be a good pair,” I reply. He nods and smiles. Oh that smile. That smile makes my heart thump like Thumper does from Bambi. He speaks again, asking random questions here and there.

I silently remind myself to text Hyosung ASAP. Because boy do we have a lot of stories to share.

But I don’t let that bother me. Nor do I let my further delayed essay. That’s going to need an all-nighter. Which I’m not really looking forward to because my dark circles are crying for help.

But who cares when I have Yongguk here with me. We continue our conversation as we sip our coffees.

My hot coffee with two sugars and no milk.

Happy birthday Kim Himchan~! All those cakes look real good. Can't believe how many you got. :O 

Cannot wait for Secret's comeback ~! I am TOTALLY excited! :D