A/N:

Before you read this chapter, please take note that when you see this mark ‘’ it represents the thoughts of the character. Now, you may proceed to the story. See you by the end of this chapter! Enjoy Swaglers!!!  ;)

~***~

Jessica’s POV

I open my eyes only to see in a blur image of a woman pacing back and forth in front of my bed. Her hands are clasping together looking like she was praying. I blink my eyes trying to replace my blur vision into a clearer one. Adding my right hand by rubbing it made me see clearly now. I sat up, slowly, and frowned when a towel dropped from my forehead. I look up again to the woman with a bewildered gaze in front of me who’s oblivious that I was back in my consciousness. ‘What happened?’ I asked myself trying to remember what happened that caused Tiffany to be worried like this.

Oh, sorry about that. It’s me, Jessica Jung who always forgot about some things that happened. But, don’t worry, after how minutes when you will only give me a time, I may remember it again.

Tik. Tok. Tik. Tok. Tik. Tok. Tik. Tok. Ding!

Yea right, I accidentally cut my finger with a knife because I gave my full attention to Tiffany that I forgot that I’m still cutting the meat. Then, there was a deep red liquid flowing from my fingers. Blood. I shivered again and brought my now trembling hand where the injured finger located, in my line of sight. I took a deep breath because of relieve when I saw the blood was gone and was replaced by a pink band aid.

“Oh my god, Jessica!” I cringed because of the loudness of the voice. I was about to look up at her but she pounced on me, hugging me tightly while I’m in between her legs. If I’m standing, she will definitely look like a koala in a tree. But nonetheless, a smile formed in my face, totally liking the fact that I am in her arms now. I hugged her back and she’s mumbling something like, ‘thank God you’re awake´, repeatedly.

We stayed like that for a moment until I heard some sniffling sounds that I immediately broke the hug. I got confused when I saw tears falling down in her face. I cupped her cheeks while wiping it. For unknown reason, I got hurt too when I saw her crying.

‘Stupid! It’s because you love her.’ I shook my head when that thought came across my mind. No, I don’t love her. And if I really do, I shouldn’t, I can’t, and I won’t. I shouldn’t because I can’t bring myself again losing someone special. And we better off friends so that I won’t hurt her.

I stop wiping her tears but remained holding her cheeks. “Hey, stop crying.” I said while looking straight into her orbs. I observed her face. Puffy eyes, reddened nose and cheeks moistened by the tears, and a messy hair. But above all of the things I mentioned, she was still beautiful in any angles.

“Stop crying okay? Why are you crying by the way?” I frowned, still eyes glued in her face. She looked away and even though her cheeks were already red because of her crying, the blush is still visible. “I was, I was- erm. Never mind.” She stuttered while loosening her grip from me. Yes, even though I already broke the hug a few minutes ago, her hands were still clinging around my neck.

I held her hands by mine. I turned her head to face me by holding her chin. My eyes are never leaving hers’. “I felt bad when I saw you crying, especially when I don’t know the reason behind those tears. Now, you don’t want me to feel bad, do you?” she shook her head and sigh. “I was scared. I know this sounds weird, but I thought it was my fault why you fainted.” She dropped her head low. I smiled. “Well, it wasn’t your fault.” “It was my fault! If only I looked away from your gaze, you won’t cut your finger. Or, blamed my eyes who caught your attention from whatever you’re doing in that time!” my smile was replaced by a big ‘O’. I pulled my hands away from hers and clasped it together. My natural gesture when I was embarrassed. She covered when she realized what she had said. I can feel blood rushed towards my face. And I think, she feels the same, or even worse. Well, maybe this is the time when I will call this as ‘TOMATO-HEAD TIME!’, but of course, I didn’t say that out loud.

It was a silence after that. Only breathings can be heard in the room. Sometimes, I will glance towards her, and she will caught me and vice versa. Well, I think I want her to know the reason why I fainted. “I have a phobia in blood. So that’s explained why I fainted.” I told her the truth. She gasped when I said. Finally, we have a different topic which also means I need to dig up some information from my past and tell her that. “R-really?” her eyes are widening unable to believe what I had said. I nodded and sighed. “How?” she muttered.

I moved backward, leaned my back in the headboard and sighed sadly. I brought my knees towards my chest and hid my face by leaning my forehead on my knees. I recalled that incident again and tears started to fall from my eyes without her knowing. I tried to calm myself but it’s useless.

Suddenly, I can feel a hand touching my shoulder. I look up and saw Tiffany smiling. “You know if you don’t want to tell me the reason, its okay. You don’t have to force yourself in telling me. I understand.” With a gentle touched by her palm on my cheek, the heavy feelings on my heart suddenly disappeared. With her brightest smile that I witnessed in my whole life, the darkness that engulfing me was replaced by light. I can’t help but stared in her comforting eyes that maybe, somehow can drown me. It’s too deep that I can only focus on it. Not caring about my surrounding.

‘NO! This is wrong! I can’t love her.’ I closed my eyes breaking our gazing contest. I opened it again when I heard my doorbell rung. “Let me get it. Maybe it’s the delivery man.” She said. Delivery man? I saw her walking towards the door. I took this opportunity without her by my side to breathe normally. I got off from the bed and walked towards the bathroom to freshen up and calm the rapidly beating of my heart. I look at myself through the mirror and started talking into my reflection.

“You can’t love her. Even if you do, you can’t. You’re not ready. You would only end up hurting you both. And most of all, you don’t deserve her. She’s too much for you. You can’t Jessica Jung. Always keep that in your mind, Jung Sooyeon.” I washed my face using the non-injured hand and dried it with towel. I took a deep breath before stepping out from the bathroom.

I saw her preparing something on my table. She looked up to me when she felt my presence. She smiled. ‘Jung, just keep calm and act the natural self of yours towards her.’

“What’s that?” I asked while approaching her. “I ordered lunch for us. I think it was the best than waiting for you to wake up and continue your cooking.” I nodded. I sat on the chair and observed her, who is busy setting up the foods. “Thanks. But I really want to cook for you.” I pouted, unconsciously. I heard her chuckle and went to the nearby trashcan and threw the plastics. She sat on the other chair. ”You can cook for me anytime you want.” She gave me the spoon and fork. “So, that means you will come here anytime I wanted you to come?” I grinned and put the spoon filled with rice and chicken in my mouth.”Like I said, anytime except when my presence is required in the office.” She explained. I nodded like a child and she chuckled in return. “And, I’m expecting too much for your dish. Better make it delicious so I won’t be disappointed.”

~***~

After lunch, we decided to talk. I wanted to do something else like, I want to continue the ‘tour’ but she refused because of my condition. I said that I’m okay already but she said that it’s better to know each other first to avoid some embarrassment like what happened that night. And I got tongue tied with that. And now, we are sitting on the couch, with an awkward atmosphere.

“So, you’re Korean?” I broke the silence between us. “Yes. I’m sorry for not telling you sooner. I didn’t think about telling you that. I thought it wasn’t necessary. I’m really sorry.” She apologized while bowing her head. “No, it’s okay really. I was the one who couldn’t hid my feelings well. So, I just blurted out that I-I like you…” I paused, trying to read her face. I saw a tint of pink in her cheeks and that made me a little aloof. “You l-like me?” she pointed at herself. I nodded sheepishly. “Yes, I like you. I like you, as a friend. And I want you to be my best friend. I know that we just met, but I have the feeling that I can trust you.” I lied except from the first and last sentences. I have to do this. I know that there’s something growing inside me, and I know where it will lead to. It will lead me to feel what they called the most beautiful but at the same time, dreadful thing you will experience in your life, and that is love.

She sighed and I saw something, a little bit disappointment in her eyes. “Oh, thank you Jessica. I’m grateful to hear something like that from a person like you. I like you too. And I also want to be your close or like what you said, best friend. I can see that you’re a beautiful person too.” She smiled that caused my heart to skip a bit. “Y-you’re welcome.” I stuttered. Blame my heart for that. *sigh*

“So, how- I mean, I really didn’t have any clue that you’re a Korean you know.” She chuckled. “The same comment as my friends here in California. They couldn’t believe that I’m a Korean after I told them. Is it not obvious?” she asked me while leaning her back in the couch. “It’s not. By any chance, are you a half blooded?” I can’t help but doubt you know. She doesn’t have any Korean features. “I wish I am so that you wouldn’t doubt me. But, no, I am a pure Korean. I was born and grew up here in California and went to Korea when I was 17 and came back here after 4 years.”

Author’s POV

Jessica also inclined her back in the couch. “What did you do in Korea for those four years?” she asked Tiffany. They are completely comfortable with each other despite the short time that they spent together. “I forgot to tell you that we have a company there. My father called and told me that I’m going to continue my study in Seoul. I don’t know why he wanted me to study there because there are many universities here in California which are the best in the course of being interior designer.” answered Tiffany. “Maybe he had other reasons for you being there.” Jessica said. “Maybe.” “You said that your father called you? Why he didn’t tell you in person?” “He’s staying in Korea together with my brother. I came back here together with mom. Apparently, she went to Korea yesterday. And I’m waiting her to call me right now.” Tiffany took out her phone from her bag and checked it. “How many siblings do you have?” “I only have a brother.” There was a sad tone when she said that. Jessica noticed this but she decided not to ask about it. ‘Maybe they got into a fight.’ She thought.

“Hey, why you are the only one who’s asking me?” Tiffany sat up straight while frowning to Jessica. Jessica chuckled and shrugged her shoulders. “You’re not asking me. So I decided to continue my interrogation about your life. Sorry for being nosy.” Jessica grinned and stood up from the couch. Tiffany’s eyes were on her. “It’s okay you know. And why did you stand up when I was about to ask you? Are you going to leave me and my questions hanging?” “No, I’m just going to get some drink for us. Then you could ask me anything.” Jessica said and walked to the kitchen. Tiffany sighed and put her elbow in the armrest of the couch.

‘Oppa….’ She thought. No, it’s not Donghae. Donghae grew up in Los Angeles and even though he’s a Korean too, as far as she knew he hasn’t stepped in Korea. There’s only one person that she’s referring to as ‘oppa’.

Tiffany was snapped out in her little daydream when Jessica put the glass of orange juice in front of her face. She looked up and saw Jessica smiling at her. She smiled back and grabbed the glass. “You can ask me a question now.” said Jessica while taking a seat beside Tiffany. There was only one question that Tiffany wanted to know but she was hesitating. Besides, she doesn’t have any questions that she wanted to ask because Jessica already told her about her past. After a few seconds, she decided to ask what she wanted to know. “Well, I don’t know what to ask you since you already told me about your past. Except, I wanted to ask you about your- your lo-love life.” She asked sheepishly while shyly sipped her orange juice and lowered her head. Jessica’s eyes went wide and opened. She was shocked by the question.

Tiffany looked up when Jessica didn’t reply. “It’s okay if you don’t want to share it to me.” She was disappointed. Jessica finally recovered from the shock. “It’s not that I don’t want to share my love story to you. The problem is, I never been in a relationship. I-I never been in love.” ‘Until now that I met you.’ She thought. Now it was Tiffany’s turn to be shocked. She was speechless of what she heard. “A-Are you sure?” she stuttered unable to believe what Jessica told her. “Yup, I didn’t have interest into relationships before. I gave my full attention to my studies.” She answered truthfully. Tiffany smirked when she heard the past tense that Jessica used. Jessica raised her eyebrows when she saw Tiffany’s smirk. “What?” she asked. “You used past tense that means you have someone right now.” Jessica blushed and quietly cursing herself for being careless. “I’m not in a relationship right now!” she answered quickly. She hoped that it will make tiffany satisfied. Unfortunately, Tiffany is too clever that her answer will only make her burn because of embarrassment. “I didn’t say that you are in a relationship. Well, you said that you are not in a relationship, so I conclude that you have someone in your heart, someone you love. So, who is it?” Tiffany moved her face closer to Jessica in order to see if she was lying. Jessica gulped because their faces were so close right now. She can see clearly the beautiful features of Tiffany that she wanted to just confess her love in the front of Tiffany’s face. Tiffany’s hypnotizing her. She was already in her spell, there’s no way she can get out of here now. She was about to say something when her phone rang.

Jessica smiled. “I need to answer the call.” She pointed at her phone near the TV. Tiffany leaned back and bloated her cheeks. Jessica chuckled before she went where the phone is. She looked at the caller and grinned.

‘Calling: KC; ShikShinSoo’ 

(A/N: KC=Kim’s Company. And I know that you already know who is ShikShinSoo)

It was her colleague from the Kim’s Company and also one of her best buddies. She answered the call. “Hello?” “AYO SICA!” she put her phone away from her ear because of the loudness of the voice. “Yah SooYoung! Can you lower your voice?” her friend laughed from the other line. “Okay, I’m sorry. I just miss you.” She knew that Jessica is glaring at her right now even though she cannot see her. “Correction, we all miss you Unnie!” another voice appeared in the other line that she recognized as YoonA. Jessica just smiled. “Okay, I miss you all too! By the way, what do you want SooYoung?” she asked. “aww, you hate us that much? We just wanted to know that you’re okay there.” Jessica glanced at Tiffany who looked away immediately. She chuckled. “I’m okay. Very okay here SooYoung-ah.”

Tiffany looked at Jessica again, and saw her still staring at her. If she looked away a few seconds ago, now, she held Jessica’s gaze who’s talking on her phone. She doesn’t know why she felt very comfortable with Jessica. She also doesn’t know why she was disappointed when Jessica said that she only like her as a friend. ‘Maybe you’re expecting more than that.’ She shook her head because of that thought. She broke her eye contact with Jessica. Then her cell phone beeped. She picked it beside her and opened the message.

To: Tiffany

Hey sis! You better come here in the office now. Your jerk ex-boyfriend is here making some commotion. So, hurry up girl!

From: Nicolle

Tiffany immediately stood up and started picking up her stuffs.

Jessica was laughing when she saw Tiffany rushing. “Soo, I gotta go. Just call me another time.” She talked to the other line where SooYoung and her friends were still laughing. “E-erm. Okay. Just take care!” “Okay, same with you all. Bye.”

When she hung up, she saw Tiffany approaching her. “Jess, I’m sorry but I have to go. There’s an emergency in the office. See you again! Just keep in touch with SMS. Bye~” she didn’t even give a formal good bye and then Tiffany was already gone. “Bye.” She mumbled and then smiled to herself. She went to her bed and laid on it. She started to recall what happened today and then ended up rolling in the bed while giggling. She forgot about the scolding-herself-part that she did in the bathroom.

~***~

It was already night time when Tiffany arrived at her quiet apartment. She sat tiredly in the couch while tossing her things away. She was exhausted physically and mentally after what happened in the office a few hours ago. It was supposed to be a perfect day but because of DongHae, it wasn’t anymore. She planned to spend the whole day with Jessica, but because of her jerk former boyfriend, her plan failed.

She walked to her room while thinking about DongHae’s words. She groaned while shaking her head trying to not recall those things for a moment. She entered her dark bedroom and switched on the light revealing the pink walls, bed and other things in her room. She began to strip in order to wear some comfortable clothes.

While changing, she caught a sight of her bra in the closet. She chuckled when she remembered about the ‘thing’ that Jessica hid from her. Yes, it was Jessica’s bra. The truth is, she saw it but kept quiet about it because she knew that it will only make Jessica shy. And an embarrass Jessica always wants to be alone. For sure, if she knew that Tiffany saw it, maybe it will be a super duper awkward day for them.

After changing her clothes, she walked back to the living room and sat back in the couch with a thud. She was searching for the remote of the television when her phone rang. She searched it in her bag and answered the call.

“Hello?”

“Sweetheart?” a husky voice called Tiffany with a gentle tone. Tiffany straightened herself in the couch while smiling widely.

“Daddy!” she exclaimed excitedly. The father and the daughter haven’t talk for so long. The man chuckled in the other line.

“Yes, this is your old man sweetheart. I miss you so much! I’m really sorry that I didn’t call you, I’m too busy. And also, blame your mother for separating us.” Tiffany giggled when she heard the childish tone of her father. But there was something grew inside of her heart when she heard the word ‘separating’. She was about to answer when another voice interrupted her.

“Don’t say that Daniel! I’m not the only one who decided to separate them. Give me the phone.” Tiffany recognized the demanding voice as her mother. The smile disappeared from her face when she heard the ‘separate’ again. Now she recognized the feeling that she’s feeling right now, it was longing, for someone she missed so much. And also, hurt. While she was lost in her thoughts, her parents were arguing childishly in the other line.

“But honey, I’m still talking to her!”

“I don’t care! You won’t call her anyway when I didn’t tell you so. Give me that.”

“Wait, I’m just going to say goodbye to our daughter.”

“Well, hurry up you old man!”

“Hey! You’re old too you know!”

“Whatever. Just bid your goodbye already to our daughter.”

“Baby girl, I’m going now okay?” no response.

“Tiffany?” and that’s the time when Tiffany was snapped from her thoughts.

“O-oh. Yes dad.”

“I’m going now. Your short-tempered mom is on the period of her permanent cessation of menstruation. She wants to talk to you. Bye honey! I love you!” she giggled at the remark of her father to her mom.

“Okay dad. Good bye, I love you too. I miss you.” She replied while smiling softly when she heard her mother scolding her father by saying that she understood what he told to their daughter. And she denied that she’s on a menopause. Tiffany missed this, her parents’ childish arguments. She missed spending time together with her family.

“Hello dear?”

“Mom? What time did you arrive in Korea?” asked Tiffany.

“I’m sorry that I didn’t call you as soon as I arrived here. My cellphone had drained its battery. I’m sorry dear.” Her mother sighs.

“It’s okay mom.” Tiffany then heard someone calling her mother. She frowned.

“Mom? Are you in the office?”

“Oh, yes. We have an urgent meeting and I just sneak out for just a minute, that turns out to be how man y minutes because of your dad, because I want to tell you that I arrived already and I don’t want you to worry. I’m sorry dear that I can’t talk to you for long even though I want to.” Tiffany can feel the sincerity in the voice. She sighed. She’s already used to this situation. Her parents are always busy. The only thing that their parents differ from the other busy parents was they know how to make it up by spending weekends together. But now, she doesn’t even know if it will happen again.

“Yeah. Its okay mom. Don’t worry.” She answered sadly. She heard a sigh from the other line.

“I’m really sorry Tiff. You know that we have to separate you. I know that it’s hard for you, but we have to, okay? This is for your own good. And, see, it works. You already found a guy. I hope you’ll thank us after this. Good bye baby-girl.” Then her mother hung up. She sighed and then leaned her back again against the couch. Her tears are threatening to fall from her eyes. Her parents don’t know yet that she and DongHae were not in a relationship anymore.

She sighed for the nth time and went to her fridge to get something that could refresh her mind. She grabbed 4 cans of beer and went back in the couch again. She opened the can and drank the half in one gulp.

She remembers the threat that DongHae told her. ‘If you won’t come back to me, I will tell your friends about your little secret.’ She shut her eyes and emptied her can.

“Argghh!!!! I HATE YOU DONGHAE!!!!!!” she threw the empty can with full force in the wall and screamed while her tears started to fall. “I hate you. I hate you.” She repeated. She may be tough from the outside, but in the inside, she’s vulnerable. The truth is, she didn’t and will never love DongHae. She was only in a relationship with DongHae because for some important reason. For short, she only forced herself to be with him. When he caught DongHae cheating on her, she was only hurt because she was betrayed not because she loves DongHae. She hasn’t move on yet, and if she will love another person, it will never be DongHae. ‘Jessica’ the thought of the name comforted her a little. But the anger and pain are still there. ‘It was so unfair. Why is it when you’re already happy, something will ruined it? Why is it so wrong when for you its right? Life is so unfair.’ She thought before she opened another can and continued drinking. Spending the whole night solemnly and questioning herself what did they do wrong that they didn’t deserve to love each other freely?

~***~

A/N

I finished this chapter last Wednesday but I didn’t have the chance to update.

And I felt down lately because I remembered the days that I spent with my best friend (I don’t know if we still are) when I saw the letter which she gave me in my birthday when I tidied my things in my room. I couldn't help but to feel like crying because the friendship that i taught will last forver, ruined just because of pne story. well, we're talking about trust here. *sigh*