-Chapter Eleven-

Denial

It wasn’t that she couldn’t feel what his actions were trying to say or not hear what his strong feelings are shouting to her. She could and she knew every bit about it, what his eyes were telling her every time, what his smiles for every time she sees them.

Dara fluttered her eyes slowly as she brought her hand to cover it from the leaking sunlight in her room. She tried to move only to feel someone next to her. She stiffened as she finally recalled what happened. She stared at him as he was sleeping there. He was facing her, his arm around her waists.

She blinked few times hoping that everything will soon fade before her eyes, that she was just dreaming something she must never dream. But then he remained there sleeping innocently right next to her, close to her that their bodies were touching. She quickly pulled herself away as she stood up raking her hair, eyes tightly shut.

How can she do such thing? She asked herself as she felt her breathing was getting heavy. She was his goddamn professor and he was her student and that alone draw a big line between them that should never be crossed! She raked her hair more in frustration.

 Why did she allow herself to be weak in front of someone and worst in front of her 19 year old student! For goodness’ sake, how would he interpret everything when he was infatuated with her?

She’s not blind and definitely no matter how she hated it, she could still feels. And she knew how he was infatuated with her. ‘Stupid,’ she muttered bitterly to herself as she was about to get out of the bed when Jiyong woke up sitting down, eyes widen and searching. She stared at him for a moment, blinking. Their eyes met and they were consumed by silence. They were staring at each other for almost a minute now, no one was talking and it was as if no one was breathing. Then slowly their silence started becoming awkward.

‘Are you okay now?’ he asked breaking the silence, stopping the atmosphere from getting awkward as he was rubbing his nape. Dara stared at him for seconds as she slowly nodded. ‘I guess,’ she answered as she averted her gaze away. Jiyong gently placed his palm on her forehead checking her temperature. He smiled as he stood up and started stretching. Dara just stared at him.

He tilted his head left and right as he threw punches in the air stretching his arm. Without any words he bent down grabbed the tray as he walked out of the room with her still staring at him. She was sitting on the bed still in disbelief when he returned to her room grabbing the small basin and towel then walked out of the room once more.

For the third time he went inside her room this time grabbing his things. ‘Good morning by the way I forgot greeting you,’ he smiled as she felt like she jumped a bit on her place. She stared at him and gave a tight nod face still lost of everything that was happening. ‘I’ll be going now, I still need to go home,’ he said as he spun on his heels and walked to her room’s door.

‘Let’s have breakfast first,’ she said as he looked at her shock written on his face, he was staring at her completely not expecting what she said. She got off her bed and he stood there stiffen staring at her still in big disbelief. She then grabbed her hair and tied it in a bun using the ribbon placed on the top of her working table.

She then walked out of her room as he was left there still standing in awe. He blinked once, blinked twice as he shook his head. ‘Aishh, pull yourself together it’s just breakfast,’ he hissed to himself as he ruffled his hair.  He soon broke into giddy chuckles as he walked out her room following her.

She was now on the kitchen with the refrigerator open as she was getting something form it. He stood there leaning on the wall watching her with a smile on his lips. If only he could wake up every day with this sight, he will never ask for more. Having her with him was more than enough. It was more than what he could ask for.

She grabbed four eggs from the refrigerator, ham and cheese then she started cooking while he remained standing there staring at her as she prepared their breakfast.

He walked to the chair and sat on her breakfast table as she was arranging the plates with eggs, ham, cheese and toast. She then placed the plate in front of him with a glass of milk as she took her seat right next to him. After saying a little prayer she started eating quietly, slowly like the way she had always been. He smiled as he started eating eyes watching her.

He could have sworn he was not eating on any five star restaurants. And his mother prepares something more than what he was eating but then he knew this was the best breakfast he had ever in his entire life.

And eating it right beside her made it more perfect that anything else.

After eating their breakfast Jiyong thanked her and left after bidding goodbye. She stared as his taxi went off. She heaved a sigh as she closed the gate and entered her house. As soon as she was able to close her door she raked her hair as she felt her back leaned on her door for support as she slid down on the floor.

Soon she started sobbing. She doesn’t know what was happening. She doesn’t know what she was doing. She raked her hair as she started feeling the pain that she was trying to forget, guilt squeezed her heart as she felt like she was choking.

She was betraying him. And she can’t believe on how she could even bring herself to do such cruel thing. God! She was betraying him! How could she let him, touch him, how could she let herself sleep with him, how could she let him make her feel better.

She hated how he could make her feel better, or how he could make her feel like she was not alone. He made her feel like she deserved to live, to be happy and to hope once more when none of those things will she ever deserve again.

She doesn’t deserve to be alive never will she deserve to feel things, to be comforted.

She doesn’t deserve to move on and be happy.

Jiyong was all smiles when he entered the school. When his classmates saw him and the smile on his lips they knew they were up to deal with another hyper Jiyong. They rolled their eyes and soon he took his seat what they were thinking came and they can only shook their head on it and laugh at the same time.

They were in the middle of their English class. Their teacher was reading them one chapter of Romeo and Juliet while priding so much on how poetic and beautiful it was like she was the one who wrote it. And they can do nothing about it but listen while following what she was reading in the photo copy of the said chapter that she gave to them.

The whole classroom was silent and the only thing you could hear was her voice, her pronunciation of every word with an accent knowing how of a terror she was. No one dared talking afraid of being reprimanded and buried in thousands of English words that they doesn’t even know that existed or was even written in dictionary.

The silent atmosphere soon was disrupted when a phone rang loudly. Mrs. Bae raised her brow as she slowly placed down the book she was holding. ‘You all know how I hated phones on class right?’ she asked sharp