We both had agreed that kissing was a no no. We steered clear of each other for a whole day and a half before we both couldn’t take it any longer.

            I was folding laundry in the little room off of the kitchen when I felt him standing behind me. I kept folding waiting to see what he’d do, but he held back. When I finally turned he was gone and I slumped against the table in disappointment.

            I was staring down at the sheet I had been folding when his lips were suddenly against mine. I attempted not to let out a surprised sound, but failed as the force of his kiss pushed my head back. I was sitting on the table now as I tried to brace myself. The sheet fell to the ground forgotten as I wrapped my hands around the back of his head. My fingers convulsed in his silky hair as his tongue flicked over mine briefly. I made a soft purring noise into his mouth as I went in for more.

            I felt him pulling away and I tightened my grip on his hair, not caring if it hurt him. I was suddenly kissing his smile as he struggled to detach my hands from his hair.

            He finally got his way as he held my wrists together between one of his hands.  He brushed his thumb over my bottom lip quickly before he turned his flushed face from me and hurried out of the room. He left me breathless again.

            I felt electricity pulsing through my veins as I went outside to get some air.

            I was touching my lips and daydreaming outside the house when Woohyun, Dongwoo, and Sungyeol came up the walkway. They had been out shopping for dinner supplies. I could see from where I stood that there were some extra items in the bags too. Mainly sugary snacks and what looked like a bongo.

            “They sell drums at the supermarket now?” I laughed as the boys approached me.

            “Dongwoo stopped at a music store on the way back,” Woohyun said as he surveyed my face suspiciously.

            “Noona listen,” Dongwoo said as he started tapping a beat on the drum and free styling a rap.

            “Beautiful,” I smiled brightly.

            “Let’s go show Hoya,” Sungyeol said as they ran into the house to show everyone their new instrument.

            Woohyun stayed behind still watching my face with concern. He brought the back of his hand over my forehead and looked me in the eyes as he took my temperature.

            “I’m fine, Dr. Nam,” I joked as I brushed his hand away.

            “You’re flushed and you aren’t breathing normally. Were you just practicing or something?”

            Not dancing, I thought to myself with a small smile as I unconsciously bit my bottom lip.

            I stopped smiling as his face fell. Why was he so worried?

            “I’m fine Woohyun.” I used the most serious tone I could muster.

            He watched me like a hawk the rest of the day as I played with the others in the main room. I didn’t want to be in my room in case Sunggyu came out of his. Every time I looked at his door I saw Woohyun making a face in my peripheral.

            It was dark out by the time Sunggyu resurfaced. The moment our eyes met he stopped moving. I smiled brightly and beckoned him over with my hand, but he just nodded and went into the kitchen. I tried not to pout.

            Woohyun followed Sunggyu into the kitchen only to come out a moment later looking angry. He marched towards me and grabbed my arm, yanking me off the ground as I was dragged to the door.

            Woohyun led me across the street to the playground as I protested. He finally let my arm go and I rubbed it with a complaint as he pushed me down onto the swing. I clutched the chains as I tried not to fall backwards.

            “What is your problem?” I shouted as he started pacing in front of me.

            “What is my problem?” He repeated incredulously. “I’m not the one with a problem, but we are all going to have a big problem soon if you can’t control yourself.”

            “What are you talking about?” I said throwing my hands up in the air in exasperation.

            He stopped pacing and brought his face right in front of mine. His eyes were furious.

            “I am talking about you and Sunggyu and your total lack of concern for the rest of us,” he said coldly.

            I tried to formulate words. Any words would have helped, but I just stuttered for a moment as he regarded me.

            “I… how?”

            “He kissed you didn’t he? At the music video shoot the other day? I knew something was up with you when you were running around hugging everyone like it was New Years.”

            I didn’t say anything, but I didn’t need to. He saw the shame written all over my face.

            “I’m sorry, Woohyun,” I said sincerely.

            He covered his face with his hands and let out a sad sigh as his anger dissipated. He sat down on the swing next to me before he continued talking.

            “I’m worried about you, noona.”

            “You don’t need to worry about me. I’m supposed to worry about you,” I said quietly as I looked down at my bare feet in the dirt.

            “I can’t not worry about someone I love when they choose to walk down such a dangerous path.”

            The word love brought a pang to my heart. My head came up in surprise, but I remembered that they all loved me. This wasn’t news.

            There was something different about Woohyun, though. He seemed to understand me more than the others. He also treated me more like a close friend rather than an older sister. Other than Sunggyu, he was the only one who ever called me Julia. It was rare, but I’d noticed him say it before.

            “When you say love…” I let the question hang in the air awkwardly.

            He looked at me with sad eyes at first, but then he suddenly smiled as he pushed me a little; sending me off to the side on the swing before I came crashing back into him.

            “Noona, you think I’d have a crush on someone as old as you?”

            “Ouch!” I laughed as I held a hand to my heart; feigning a deep wound.

            His laughter wasn’t reaching his eyes the way it usually did. There was definitely something wrong with him.

            “You shouldn’t be so surprised that people care about you,” he said still trying to fake a small smile.

            “I care about you too Woohyun. You can tell me if something is bothering you. Is there anything going on with you that I don’t know?”

            He looked like he was going to say something. He had an odd look on his face as he searched mine. His gaze went from my eyes to my lips quickly before he got up.

            “I’m fine,” was all he said before walking back to the house.

            I stayed on the swing for a little while in thought. I had a terrible feeling in my gut. Something was wrong.

            Sunggyu watched as Woohyun and Julia talked from the window. At first the others had tried to crowd around and watch, but he sent them off to their beds while they grumbled like kids. He wanted to go out there, but he knew that he should just let them talk. His curiosity was killing him, though. Why was Woohyun so angry?

            That night at the club, Woohyun had practically told him that he knew about Sunggyu’s feelings for Julia. And then he had gone to comfort her in Sunggyu’s stead. Sunggyu wanted to follow her more than anything, but he had put his trust in Woohyun.

            After seeing those brothers putting their hands on her he had gone insane with fear. The rest of the night had been a blur as his fear turned into a frantic sort of passion he had never experienced before. He knew he shouldn’t have tried to kiss her. He had only wanted to protect her, but he had just hurt her instead. At least Woohyun didn’t hurt her, he thought glumly.

            Woohyun never told him where he had found her that night, but he knew Julia. She wouldn’t seek out warmth when she was upset. That was what scared him more than anything. Why would such a bright person be so drawn to the dark? It was him that drove her there and he didn’t want it to happen anymore.

            He didn’t regret kissing her at the video shoot, though. It was the best decision he had ever made. He would have never forgiven himself if he had let some empty headed actor who didn’t know or care about her be her first kiss. The thought still upset him. It was bad enough she had to kiss that guy at all.

            He had been watching them film the scene from afar. He watched sadly as her face scrunched up painfully when the actor was kissing her. The second time she had done better. He had noticed with a smile that her hand drifted up and touched his necklace during the second shot. He was still with her whether he was there physically or not.

            Nothing had made him happier than the moment he found her in the dressing room. He thought she would be upset with him or that she wouldn’t feel the same way he did. But what he found that night was the happiest person he had ever laid his eyes on. It made it hurt that much more when he told her they couldn’t be together, but she already knew. She knew as well as he did how serious their contracts were. And they both knew the punishment if they broke the rules.

            But kissing her was all he could think about after that night. How could something that was so pure be wrong?

            He knew that all of this would happen eventually. He had been struggling to keep his distance from her as soon as they met. The moment he saw her, before they were even a band and before they had even spoken to each other, he could tell she was special. His heart skipped a beat when he saw her smile and she had been throwing off his heart’s usually steady rhythm ever since.

            He was too weak. He wanted to be strong for her, but he couldn’t stay away anymore. He was like a moth drawn to a flame. Only her flame had engulfed his heart. It felt like a forest fire was raging in his chest and he couldn’t control it. And he didn’t want to.

            He understood why Woohyun was angry. This love that had developed between them was dangerous to the whole band. What he didn’t understand was why Woohyun was taking it out on Julia instead of him. Woohyun wouldn’t even look at Sunggyu, never mind talk to him. They were best friends. He should be coming to him with his concerns. He always had in the past.

            At that moment Woohyun came back in the house. Sunggyu tore his gaze from Julia as she still sat outside, so that he could meet Woohyun’s eyes. They met for a second, but then Woohyun just went to their room. He came back with a coat on and said nothing as he put his shoes on and left. He didn’t go back across the street, but down it. Sunggyu watched as he disappeared from sight. Where was he going?

            He was debating whether or not to go after him when Julia got up and made her way to the house. Sunggyu ran from the window and hid in his room like a coward. He almost slipped and fell in his socks as he slid into his dark room and leaned his back on his door.

            He listened with his ear against the door as she came in the house and approached his room. He could swear he could feel her hand resting on the wood as she tried to work up the courage to knock. After a moment of deliberation, he heard her shuffle away to her bedroom.

            He slumped down to the floor and sat for awhile in thought.

            Hours later he heard someone enter the house as he still sat on the floor of his room. He thought it’d be Woohyun, but this person was too heavy footed. He could tell that they hadn’t even taken their shoes off as they stomped up to his door and knocked.

            He opened the door to see Manager Jungryl. He was supposed to be at home with his family tonight.

            “We need to talk,” he said as he entered the room.

            “What’s going on?” Sunggyu glanced at his watch to see that it was nearly midnight.

            “I think it might be a good time for us to go over your contract again.”

            Sunggyu’s body went cold. “Why?”

            “I think you know why, Sunggyu,” Jungryl said sharply. “I expected something might happen with all you boys living with one girl, but I never thought it would be you to disappoint me.”

            Jungryl watched as Sunggyu tried to hide his horror.

            “Yes, I know about you and Julia. I can’t believe that you would risk your career and all of your band mate’s careers over a girl, but that is besides the point now. What’s done is done. Now you have to fix it before the Executives and the CEO find out.”

            “Y-you didn’t tell them?” He asked.

            “Sunggyu, I don’t know if you realize it, but my job is on the line here too. I don’t have a job without you guys and we all signed contracts. I’m not going to tell anyone about this, but you need to fix it. I don’t care how you do it so long as there is no relationship between you two other than a professional one.”

            He rested his hands on Sunggyu’s shoulders and gave them a squeeze. “End it before it destroys everything you guys have built. End it.”

            The manager left the room and Sunggyu fell to his knees in the middle of the floor. He was still there when Woohyun finally returned. He smelled like he’d been drinking, even though he wasn’t yet twenty one, but that was hardly the issue on Sunggyu’s mind.

            He was back on his feet in a second and he grabbed Woohyun by his coat. He almost lifted Woohyun onto his toes as he glared into his wide eyes.

            “You told the manager!” He knew he was loud, but he couldn’t contain his anger. He attempted to shake some sense into Woohyun’s glossy eyes as they widened in shock.

                Woohyun set his lips in a grim line as he stared into his best friend’s eyes. Sunggyu took his silence as confirmation of his betrayal. It was the most hurt he’d ever felt in his life.

            “Why would you do this? I’m supposed to be your best friend.” His vision blurred as his eyes filled with angry tears. He managed to hold them back.

            “I did it for you! You can’t keep doing this! You’ll get caught.” In his drunken state he was struggling to hold back his own tears.

            “So you told on me! On us!”

            “I only told manager Jungryl. He won’t say anything unless you give him no other choice.”

            “I still can’t believe you would do this though. What is wrong with you?”

            Woohyun kept his face blank as he met his eyes. What had gotten into him? He was hiding something.

            He let go of Woohyun’s coat when they heard a knock on the door. After a moment of silence Julia popped her head in. When she saw they were awake she came the rest of the way into the room.

            “What’s going on? I heard yelling.” The sweetness of her voice soothed his nerves. Her brown eyes were even larger than usual as she stared between them. Her hair already had knots in it from sleep. The cuffs of her pink bunny rabbit pajamas were balled up in her fists as she clenched them nervously. Her toes were still speckled with dirt from being on the playground without shoes. She was the most beautiful thing Sunggyu had ever seen.

            His breath had caught at the sight of her and he listened as Woohyun made a strange sound in his own throat.

            He tore his eyes from Julia. The look on Woohyun’s face was a familiar one. Sunggyu’s body froze.

            He knew what was wrong.

            “We’re fine Julia. Please go back to bed,” he said quietly still watching Woohyun’s face.

            “Okay, but if you need me call me,” she said as she signed a phone near her head with a cute smile on her face. When the door closed the smell of her shampoo drifted through the air and filled his head.

            “You go to bed, too,” he said to Woohyun as he went to his own mattress. He laid on his back and stared up at the ceiling sadly.

            He wasn’t worried about Woohyun. Anyone having a crush on Julia came as no surprise to him. He wished Woohyun had talked to him about it instead of going to the manager. He was hurt, but he understood. Woohyun was right. Only bad could come from the love they shared. He was almost relieved that Woohyun had feelings for her.

            It was Sunggyu that was going to hurt her again and she would need someone to help her find her way through the dark.