Minho sighed as he wrapped his arms around Taemin's waist from behind, tying to hold him back. Taemin turned and shoved against Minho, his face twisted in absolute anger and... Something else. Always something else. There was always some secret that Minho couldn't know.

"Why are you so mad?" Minho asked as he held Taemin closer, the boy's fists beating on his chest. He couldn't believe this. He had tried so hard to not lose Taemin and had somehow succeeded in making Taemin furious.

"Because that was so embarrassing!" Taemin lied, the tears streaming down his face as he buried his face in Minho's chest. He heard the relieved chuckle, just like he knew he would. Minho was so gullible and dense and just... Why did Taemin have to love him?

You'll never figure out how much you hurt me, Taemin thought as he let Minho hold him. You'll never figure out what I wanted that kiss to turn into. You'll just see me as a friend, Minho.

"Is that all? I'm sorry, Taemin. I didn't mean to... I just wanted that jerk to stop hitting on you." He tilted Taemin's face up and saw a tear still stuck in them. Gently, he rubbed it away.

Maybe if Taemin wasn't so in love, he would have figured out Minho's own feelings. The fear of wanting Taemin, but at the same time wanting Taemin with all of his heart. Wanting any excuse to touch or kiss or just be with Taemin.

Still, because of his love, love couldn't blossom. Always. there was that voice in his head that told him, with all of its ing teenage wisdom (which was really nonexistent, but Taemin listened to it anyway), that Minho couldn't possibly like him. There was no way. Nothing meant anything. Just like Minho had once said, it was in the heat of the moment.

"I'm fine," Taemin insisted with a sunny grin, one that he knew Minho would believe. He quickly turned away, fumbling with the door of the car. Minho reached over and gave the handle a gentle tug.

"Are you really okay?" he asked worriedly, but Taemin just grinned and shrugged. He climbed in and covered his face for a moment, gathering his wits. He had to just smile. He just had to smile for a little longer.

"Can you pick me up later for the pizza party?" Taemin asked sweetly, turning to Minho and batting his eyelashes. "You know, since we're dating now." He was only teasing, but God he wished that Minho would confirm it, say that he'd loved Taemin all along, that he'd be with Taemin.

Stupid wishing.

"Sure, honey," Minho joked back, trying to ignore how his heart jumped to his throat and how his lungs seemed to skip a breath. Taemin smiled and leaned over, pecking Minho's cheek gently before sitting back down and looking out of the window. He hoped that Minho wouldn't hate him for it.

"Thanks, by the way, for lunch," Taemin said finally. Minho chuckled as he to the suburban streets. White houses, perfect yards, little fenced in blossoms, and trees that looked like frozen fire. Minho sighed as he stopped at a stop sign and looked around. Suddenly, his eyes fell on a little gray house and he saw himself, older, hugging a little boy with a backpack. A yard, a lawn. A normal life. A normal son. Then, the older version of him went to the door and all Minho could see was a pair of arms wrapping around his neck, a soft voice whispering—

"Drive," Taemin murmured. Minho blinked and looked next to him, looking at the boy as if he was an alien. Minho leaned over and hugged Taemin, feeling the curves of Taemin's waist and the softness of Taemin's skin. The warmth of Taemin's shocked breath next to his ear.

What the ?!

"I'm sorry," Minho murmured again, so scared that this feeling would disappear. He hated messing up with Taemin. He knew he'd felt this before, but he hated it even more, because suddenly, Taemin seemed like so much more.

Taemin seemed like something he couldn't be.

"I forgave you already," Taemin murmured, his lips pressing to Minho's shoulder. The simple action, not even a ing kiss but so close that Minho could almost believe, had Minho's mind reeling.

"I know, but... I'm really sorry." He straightened up and sighed, driving again as Taemin rubbed his arm gently. He didn't know anything anymore, it seemed. He didn't even know if he was really feeling what he was feeling. He didn't know if this was his head going crazy or his heart being a -up.

"You're gonna pass my house," Taemin's soft voice murmured. Minho snapped back to reality and saw Taemin's house pass his line of sight. He sighed and pulled over, backing up just enough to line up with the front door. He sighed and rubbed his eyes. Taemin's hand curled over his shoulder gently.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Taemin asked softly. Minho turned and looked into Taemin's eyes, seeing that concern that he'd heard in Taemin's voice. He sighed and shook his head, smiling weakly. Taemin leaned over, kissing Minho's cheek again, not knowing that to Minho, he was doing unspeakable things.

By his lips, Minho was torn down and rebuilt again.

"I'll see you tonight," Taemin promised, rubbing Minho's arm and leaning in for another kiss on the cheek. This time, however, Minho had turned to say something and their lips caught the others', warm and perfect and so ing confusing for both of them. Taemin pulled away immediately, looking down and sighing before hugging Minho and fleeing into the sanctity of his house.

Minho sighed. The kisses were mistakes. The ones on the cheek were okay, but not the ones on Taemin's lips. Those were unforgivable. What he hated about them was the fact that they were also utterly unforgettable.

Taemin watched Minho go and gave a sigh as he flopped onto his couch. Immediately, he heard movement. His face twitched and he looked up. There he was, smirking and pinning Taemin to the couch.

"Hey," Chang Sun said. He let his hand drift over Taemin's face, noting the slightly swollen lips and the wrinkled clothes. He forced himself to keep smirking, knowing that he and his baby angel were probably never sleeping together again.

"He kissed me," Taemin sighed. Chang Sun plopped onto the couch next to Taemin. Yep, he wasn't getting laid tonight. He watched as Taemin sighed. "I'm in love with him, Chang Sun..."

"Yeah, I know," the boy said, trying to act nonchalant. "All of us know, actually. You're not exactly discreet about it." He chuckled at the look on Taemin's face. "He doesn't know, though."

"Good," Taemin mumbled. Chang Sun sighed as he tilted Taemin's face to his. He gave Taemin a little kiss, feeling how Taemin still drew towards him. Gently, Chang Sun held Taemin close by the waist.

"I..." Chang Sun felt so close to a confession, his hands on Taemin's sides and his lips still brushing against Taemins' with every word. He opened his eyes and saw Taemin's confused face. He was so beautiful, so perfect...

And his heart belonged to Minho.

"I hope you get him soon," Chang Sub murmured, pulling away. Taemin smiled and hugged Chang Sun with his arms around the older boy's neck, kissing the older boy's cheek. Chang Sun sighed and scooped Taemin into his arms.

"You're so nice," the younger boy whispered again. Taemin smiled so happily as Chang Sun kissed his forehead before bringing him to the bedroom. Taemin snuggled into Chang Sun's chest like a small animal, not knowing that the heart under his hands was breaking with each step.

"Rest up, manager," Chang Sun murmured. Taemin smiled sleepily and nodded, kissing Chang Sun's warm lips again. The boy's hand slipped under Taemin's head, holding it up to cling to the contact, before Taemin gave an exhausted giggle and fell asleep.

Why? Why, of all the people in the world, did it have to be Taemin?

"You're in love with him, but I'm in love with you," Chang Sun whispered with a chuckle when he was sure that Taemin was asleep. He leaned down for another kiss, but he stopped himself to save his own heart. Instead, he just touched Taemin's cheek gently with his fingertips before standing up and exiting the house.

~

"Hey," Minho said, his voice trailing off as he saw what Taemin was wearing. The boy bounced down the steps, all alight with excitement. His freshly-done hair framed his face and flicked against his cheeks with each step, touching the corner of his smile. His skinnies hugged his legs with every step, his sleeveless shirt tracing every curve of his body, his denim-sequin-hybrid jacket winking against Minho's headlights.

The kiss seem to have been forgotten.

"Hey," Taemin said cheerily, slipping into the car. He giggled at the way Minho was looking at him. He flicked a strand of hair behind his shoulders and batted his eyelashes. He took in Minho's physique, which was practically bulging out of his t-shirt and casual khakis.

"You look... Nice," Minho said, blinking and trying to focus on the road. He got onto the main road, but he turned the other way, towards the larger businesses and the hub of night life in this small town. Taemin just sighed happily, his eyes on the vehicles that streaked past them.

"You're a very good football player. You're really strong and you obviously train very hard, and you look really good in a uniform," Taemin said out of the blue. Minho chuckled as Taemin laughed softly and blushed. "F-forget I said that," he muttered quickly.

"No, I'm flattered," Minho said, smiling at Taemin softly. He sighed as he stopped at a red light and gazed at the bright lights in the distance. He looked over at Taemin, watching the colors on the younger's face. They looked so ugly when he saw the pale skin underneath, Taemin's natural beauty outshining any artificial light.

"Minho... I... For making me your team's manager, I have to thank you. I'll work really hard," he promised, smiling at Minho and holding up his hand. Minho high-five'd the younger boy and smiled as he wrapped his hand around Taemin's.

"It's so small," he murmured, causing Taemin to blush and smack Minho on the arm. Minho laughed and brushed his fingers along Taemin's wrist before turning back to drive. Taemin sighed and smiled, leaning on Minho's arm so casually, as if he were meant to do this.

"Thanks for being my friend," he whispered, closing his eyes. Minho chuckled and petted the top of Taemin's head as he pulled into the domain of bright lights and pumping music. Somehow, he wished that they would never reach the pizza parlor and always stay like that, wrapped in each other.

"Hey!" the coach exclaimed as the two walked through the door. The rest of the team was already there, sitting in at a circular table with cushioned seats all around it, gulping down soda and cheering over their victory. Minho laughed and sat down at the end with his arm around Taemin.

"Hey! The star and the manager shouldn't sit at the end!" someone shouted. A pair of arms snatched Taemin and passed him over everyone's lap as the boy laughed. Minho bristled as he watched those hands fumble over Taemin's body. He got up and nagged right into the boy's path, scooping him up into his arms.

"Don't let them touch you like that," he whispered into Taemin's ear, carrying the boy to the seat in the middle and sitting with the boy in his arms. The team cheered, laughing and pointing at the two red faces. One was red with anger, and the other was scarlet with embarrassment.

"Brilliant steal from Choi Minho, and TOUCHDOWN!" Jay commentated from the sidelines. Yuhno slid two drinks to the pair, and Minho smirked as he handed a cup to Taemin. The boy took a shaky sip.

"Loosen up," Minho whispered as he took his own mouthful of the sugary drink. "I'm here, so don't worry." He offered Taemin a small smile and watched as the boy grinned back.

"Hey, if you two are quite done," the coach said, a bit peeved at the isolated couple. Minho jumped and slid Taemin from his lap, the blood rising to his cheeks as the team roared with laughter. Even Taemin giggled, sipping his soda with relish.

"I think we owe these two a toast," Shindong said with mock reverence. Minho's eyes widened and he shook his head frantically. He shielded Taemin with his body as the menacing team closed in.

"No! No, toast me, but not him! He can't handle it!" Minho insisted. His 'friends' looked at each other and shrugged before grabbing him. They formed a ring around him as they pinned him to the cushions and wrenched his lips apart.

"Drink up, Minho, Jay said with a smirk before dumping a whole cup of coke into Minho's mouth. The boy tried to drink as quickly as he could, but some still spilled and got everywhere, from his hair to the cushions to down his shirt. The guys laughed as the bubbly fluid overflowed. Finally, Minho gave a hacking laugh and pushed his way through all of them, swallowing as much soda as he could as he ran through the door. Taemin's eyes widened as he heard Minho retching.

"I-is he okay?" Taemin asked as the guys drank their sodas nonchalantly. Jay smirked and shrugged, sipping his drink as he leaned back on the cushions, sighing contently.

"Yeah, he'll be fine. We do this to whoever scores the winning touchdown," he said, his smirk growing wider at the look of horror on Taemin's face. "Relax, Taemin. Our star quarterback is a big boy. He can take it."

"Take what?" Minho asked, walking in and looking at the team with confusion. The guys all laughed at his appearance, with his hair all sticky from the soda and his shirt drenched in the beverage. Taemin giggled and got up, taking Minho's hand.

"Let's get you cleaned up," he murmured, dragging Minho to the bathroom. They both tried to ignore the laughing from behind them. Taemin smiled at Minho as he closed the bathroom door behind them. It was a one-person room, with a toilet standing proudly in the corner.

"Thanks," Minho murmured as he took off his shirt. Taemin laughed as he took the soaked material, shoving it into the sink and scrubbing at it under the warm water. Minho stood closer, his abs brushed gently by Taemin's elbow as the boy rinsed out his top.

"Does this happen to you often?" Taemin asked, trying not to look at the glorious sight next to him. He knew that he'd start blushing if he did. Minho chuckled and threw a muscular arm around Taemin's shoulders, pressing his nose to Taemin's jaw. The boy seemed so far away to Minho that all he wanted was to sink into the supple body. He didn't want to lose this boy.

"Why? Are you worried?" he asked, his face relaxed into a small smile. Taemin let out a loud scoff and pushed against Minho teasingly, smirking at the older male's surprised face.

"Why would I be worried about you?" he challenged, giggling as Minho pinched his cheek gently and splashed him with water. Laughing, Taemin held up the clean shirt, tossing it to the shirtless boy.

"Aish, what about my hair?" Minho asked, touching the sugary strands. Taemin laughed and kissed Minho's cheek, noting the taste of sugar on the skin. He pulled away and searched Minho's eyes briefly for any reaction.

"I'll wash it," he offered. Minho chuckled and ducked his head into the sink, letting Taemin scrub out the locks with soap, chuckling as Taemin's fingers rubbed against his scalp. Taemin hummed as he worked, making sure to wash out the suds.

"If someone walks in on us, they're going to call the cops or something," Minho said with a laugh as he felt Taemin comb through his hair with his fingers. Taemin laughed and pulled away, letting Minho raise his head. They dried Minho's shirt and hair under the tiny little drier.

"We're going to use all of the building's energy," Taemin joked, causing Minho to laugh. The older boy moved closer as they shook out the fabric a little, the warm hair pounding against their hands. Taemin was a little sad to see the shirt go on, to be honest. Still, he concealed his dour mood as he gave Minho a brief hug, tousling his fluffy hair before going back out to the awaiting team.

The pizza had arrived by then, and by the time Minho got out, half of the pies had been devoured. He roared and dived, getting back into his seat with two slices piled on top of one another. He laughed as he chomped into them, looking at Taemin as the boy blinked at the ravenous crowd. Taemin ate slowly, in awe of the rate of consumption of the team.

"Are you guys really that hungry?" he asked, watching the bulky players stuff up to three slices into their mouths. The boys weren't even bothering with etiquette. They just rolled everything up and the food into their gaping mouths, washing it down with coke.

"We're football players. We need protein! You should know this, genius!" Yuhno teased. Taemin couldn't help but blush as the surrounding crowd roared with laughter. Minho smirked and nudged Taemin with his elbow, inciting him to give a retort. He couldn't bear to see Taemin's face so red for these guys.

"Well, you're just gonna get fat like Minho here if you keep eating like that. Just saying," Taemin joked flippantly as he nibbled at his slice, batting his eyelashes at Minho to calm the older boy's fury. The surrounding team member gave out long "ooh"s to announce the burn that had just taken place.

"You know what, I think Taemin deserves a toast for that," Minho said with a devious grin, his eyes locked with the boy's. Taemin's eyes widened and he shot under the table, squirming out and running for the exit. There was a wave of laughter as Minho got up and scrambled over laps to get out. Taemin was quick, running through the cold night, around the building into the narrow alleyway that separated the pizza place from the bookstore next to it. Minho was quicker, though, and Taemin had barely gotten three steps into the darkness before Minho's arms were around him.

"I hate you, you sneaky little fatty," the boy chuckled softly, and Taemin laughed as he turned. The harsh words were nothing more than an affirmation of friendship now, a sign that they were closer than they'd ever been. The pair backed against the wall, leaning against it as Minho searched Taemin's face in the darkness and Taemin just enjoyed the warmth of Minho's body. He felt like he was a million miles away from anything and everything.

"I..." Taemin trailed off as he wrapped his arms around Minho's neck. The older boy didn't know what was driving him, but he had his hands on Taemin's ribs and they were going lower, until they rested and curved around Taemin's hips. Why was this boy so beautiful? So charming and funny and smart and perfect, and out here it was like the world didn't matter. All that mattered was Taemin.

"You what?" he asked as he pressed their bodies together. Taemin blushed and leaned his head on the brick wall behind him, looking into the darkness of the alley. It shocked him when Minho grabbed his chin and turned it back to Minho's eyes, gentle but firm. He wanted to hear Taemin's voice, see Taemin's eyes on him only. They leaned closer together, wondering about the other's heart, about the other's true thoughts.

"Minho... I... I want to—" Taemin started to say, but there was a suddenly clanging sound as the pizza parlor's doors opened. Minho's eyes closed in frustration as he was yanked back into the real world and had to realize that no, he could never want what he wanted. He didn't want to be gay. He couldn't be.

He wasn't.

"Hey, what was taking you guys so long?" Jay asked as he looked at the pair. Minho glared at his friend and looked back at Taemin, not knowing what to do now that the world did matter and that he couldn't have this wanting for Taemin. He couldn't accept it in himself.

"I'll drive you home," he said curtly. He took Taemin's hand and dragged him away, not bothering to look at his friends. Taemin managed a floundering wave as he was kidnapped.

"I had fun!" he shouted as he struggled to keep up with Minho's pace. The whole team watched them go, and then Jay. They all collectively punched him in the right shoulder before marching off, with only Kris next to him.

"Ow!" Jay whimpered as he rubbed his arm. Kris sighed and watched the boy struggle to rub away the pain. He shook his head at Jay's density.

"Bro, didn't you notice that those two were having a serious moment?" Kris asked, groaning softly as Jay shook his head. The tall boy swung an arm around Jay and led him away, patting his friends shoulder.

In the car, Minho was angrily glaring at the road ahead. Why? Why did this happen to him? Why the did he have to see Taemin and see this ing perfect person? He looked over at Taemin to yell at him, to berate him for making Minho so confused and so conflicted and so—

"Mine," Taemin mumbled in his sleep, his cheek pressed against the heel of of his hand and his head leaned against the window. His breath fogged up the glass with each unconscious breath he took. Minho sighed as his anger melted.

"You're adorable," he mumbled as he went back to driving. He fixed his eyes on the road, trying to sort out his own feelings. Why? Why did he want Taemin like this? He even dared to say that he needed Taemin. But he couldn't need him, right?

After all, the kid was a .

He'd accepted Taemin as a person, but he couldn't ever accept Taemin's gayness. Homouals were freaks. Cold-hearted freaks who manipulated everyone else. They just ed around, never caring about anyone and just abandoning everything. They weren't human. They were mistakes.

But then, what was Taemin? Taemin wasn't just manipulating him, right? He couldn't be. He wouldn't... He was Minho's friend. he wasn't a mistake. He was perfect, and beautiful, and he was so... Minho would run out of words long before he ran out of feelings for Taemin.

Feelings? What feelings? Heart pounding, heavy breathing, jealousy, possessiveness, admiration.. They weren't feelings! Anyone who had feelings for a wad just ing asking for trouble. Begging for it, even, because feelings for a were about as useful as feelings for a cold-blooded killer. Loving one was—

Love? Who ever mentioned love? Who would fall in love with this freak? Why was Minho even thinking about love? He didn't love Taemin! He didn't love someone who wasn't even normal! He couldn't! His heart wasn't like that, or his body or his brain. He didn't... , he couldn't love this kid!

Minho didn't even notice stopping in front of Taemin's house. He looked at the boy, knowing that he'd have to bring Taemin in soon. He leaned over to wake him up, but Taemin looked so peaceful...

"I need your help," Minho whispered. "I want someone. I want this person more than life. I want to hold this person and keep this person and I don't want to see this person look away from me, but... I can't want this person. It'd be so wrong, Taemin... It'd just... It'd everything up."

"Pie," Taemin sighed happily in his sleep. Minho bit his lip to contain his laughter and the soft hair before kissing Taemin's chilly cheek. He couldn't help but want to hold Taemin before the boy froze.

"Tell me how to stop wanting you," he whispered, leaning even closer to pressed his lips to Taemin's head. Taemin squirmed and swatted weakly at something in front of his knee, and Minho chuckled. He took the frigid hand and kissed it before unbuckling Taemin.

Minho blew on his own hands as he got out of the car. It was colder than he'd expected. He circled around the vehicle, opening the passenger's door and scooping Taemin into his arms. Slowly, he made his way into the front door. It was a little bit of a hassle, getting Taemin situated into bed, but it was worth it. He loved the sight of Taemin, curl safely in his blankets and mumbling about food.

"Cake," he'd been saying dreamily when Minho left. The boy smirked at the memory of it as he drove himself home, his lips curled upward at the sweet thoughts of the younger boy.

Then, halfway home, he realized what the mystery person he'd seen in his vision had said. Lips pressed to his ear, arms so familiar around his neck, hands in his hair.

I love you.

A/N - Are the chapters too long?

More to come! Comments are love <3